Write the best AWB sunset headline!


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Nathaniel Firethorn
September 10, 2004, 09:54 PM
The media are cranking up the hype on the AWB sunset even now, 75 hours before the ban ends. Time to help 'em out a bit. :evil:

ASSAULT WEAPONS RAMPAGE THROUGH THE STREETS!!!!

Bayonet lugs turn honor students into werewolves shock horror!!

What's yer favorite? :D

- pdmoderator

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Roc_Kor
September 10, 2004, 09:57 PM
"IMPENDING DOOM AWAITS AS ASSAULT WEAPONS HIT STREETS"

a week later

"STILL WAITING FOR THE IMPENDING DOOM THAT WILL COME"

a week later

"OUR VIGILANCE IS KEEPING THE CRIMINALS FROM DOING ANYTHING... YEAH, THAT'S IT!"

:evil:

Preacherman
September 10, 2004, 09:57 PM
How about "Ding, Dong, The Witch ('s Ban) Is Dead" ?

:D

possenti
September 10, 2004, 10:04 PM
Evil Black Rifles Flooding the Streets!

Ice Cream Trucks now serving Uzi's!

I've actually thought about writing a letter to the editor with a very sarcastic tone like this. I plan on waiting about a week or two after the sunset and then asking why I didn't see any AK-47's floating down MY street. I'd been standing there since the 13th with a fishing net....

I doubt it would get published, but I might try anyway. Sometimes I'm surprised.

Norton
September 10, 2004, 10:06 PM
Blood in the Streets.....film at 11.......

SodiumBenzoate
September 10, 2004, 10:29 PM
HURRICANE IVAN RAINS BLOOD!!!!1!

Standing Wolf
September 10, 2004, 10:35 PM
September 13, 2005:

BLOOD BATH IN STREETS STILL EXPECTED!

Moparmike
September 10, 2004, 10:35 PM
Assault Weapons Flood Streets!
One man prepares by securing a fishing net accross the street

ACP230
September 10, 2004, 10:49 PM
Despite Sunset
Drive-By Bayonettings
Remain Rare

It's a bit too long, but I used to write headlinea and make 'em fit.

PMDW
September 10, 2004, 10:53 PM
Assault Weapons Ban expires, guns turn against their owners, 1000+ die of bayonet wounds.

Assault Weapons Ban Expires, Streets engulfed by rivers of blood, damage nears $4M

Assault Weapons Ban Expires, plantet explodes, billions die, Brady Group -"We told you so"

chetth
September 10, 2004, 10:55 PM
Blood in the Streets, Dewey Defeats Truman.

snug
September 10, 2004, 11:00 PM
RIGHTS OF THE PEOPLE RESTORED!!!

Foreign Devil
September 10, 2004, 11:00 PM
Assault Weapons Fall From Sky

Deer Population Plummets as Hunters Take Up Uzis, AK's

ZeroX
September 10, 2004, 11:04 PM
AK-47 DEATH MACHINES SOLD AT SCHOOL CAFETERIAS AND TOY STORES, CHILDREN PLAY "SHOOT THE INFIDEL" ON THE PLAYGROUND....terror, streets, flood, gangs, crime, DEATH!

Phantom Warrior
September 10, 2004, 11:13 PM
"ABOUT DAMN TIME"

That's what I'd like to see...

nhhillbilly
September 10, 2004, 11:27 PM
How about WE got some FREEDOM.


I also like it's about time.



OR

"IT's a good start"

Now the 1986 full auto ban, Gun control act of 1968, 1923 gun control act.

xdoctor
September 10, 2004, 11:34 PM
Liberals beware: They're back.

Thousands of children slain with crude, last ditch effort spears.

Got flash?

Free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty we're free at last!

schizrade
September 10, 2004, 11:49 PM
"Assault Weapons Ban Expires! Country faces great peril!"
...one week later...
"Country in the grip of peril! Assult Weapons coming!"
...week after that...
"Peril at it highest level in years! Assault Weapons to blame!"
...sometime in december...
"The peril has grown so great, that it must not be shown to you! It would be far too perilous!"
...sometime 20 years from now...
"Unending peril envelops the world! Peril so great it is perilous to even mention the peril!"

*edit - somebody HAS to see the nod here.... Anybody?

Little Loudmouth
September 10, 2004, 11:50 PM
AWB EXPIRES; CARNAGE WILL BEGIN

PMDW
September 10, 2004, 11:53 PM
1923 gun control act.

Wasn't it 1934?

Finch
September 11, 2004, 12:08 AM
OMGZORS!!!11! TEhY ASSALT WEPonS BAN Are EXSPIERING!!11!! aLl ur aK47 r BeLONG 2 US!!1!1 We'z R Teh D()()/\/\3|)

SouthpawShootr
September 11, 2004, 12:11 AM
Assault weapon ban ends, manufacturers making magazines at capacity.

berettaman
September 11, 2004, 12:24 AM
"Our Long National Nightmare is Over"
free citizens regain rights illegally siezed.

Rawlings
September 11, 2004, 12:52 AM
"Brady Group Caught Throwing AK-47s Out Back of Speeding Van"

jefnvk
September 11, 2004, 12:57 AM
Bayonetting and Grenade Attacks Remain at All-Time Low

MAURICE
September 11, 2004, 01:34 AM
BOOYAH! :D

Moparmike
September 11, 2004, 01:37 AM
schizrade, I think the Holy Handgrenade of Antioch could take care of all that pointy-teethed peril. But it must be between 2 shrubberies for full effect...:D :rolleyes:

Telperion
September 11, 2004, 01:41 AM
Ok, I'll bite :)

"Assault Weapons Flood Streets; cause Traffic Snarls"
"Police on Edge over Prospect of Bayonettings"

:D

Amadeus
September 11, 2004, 02:51 AM
A Headline for the Antis:

"Blinded by the Sunset: Visions of America's Chronic Gun Condition"





A Headline for the pros:

'Sunset' Bringing a New Dawn for Gun Rights

Fingolfin
September 11, 2004, 03:09 AM
"Assault Weapon Ban sunsets, Rosie O' Donnell still fat"

You can have my spoon when you pry it from my cold dead hands!

:neener:

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