The "expert"


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NotQuiteSane
February 22, 2003, 04:56 AM
I live across the street from a real, um, uh, something.

I've learned a lot from this guy. Supposedly ex navy, & sherrifs deputy. things like:

CSI is a reality show.

All firearms in Oregon must be registered

by federal law, a revolver may only hold 6 rounds, pistols, & long arms 5, including one in the chamber. Due to this law, there are no weapons made that do not conform.

Bobby Kennedy was shot with a semi-auto (and not the 9 shot H&R found in sirham's hand)

The Marine corps makes air rifles based on the m14 (true), which is the favorite weapon of the recon teams, because it is silent

Almost every police department in the United States uses S&W revolvers. those that don't use Colt revolvers.

S&W provided funding to start Colt, Schofield, Frontier and Ruger

The .30 carbine is the best deer rilfe you can buy, but a 32-20 is a good second choice

Teh 10mm cartridge is illegal because it is armor peircing. It will also blow a man's head clean off

I'll get 10 more MPG if I put dual exhaust under my truck (ever hear of the guy who put every gas saving device he could find on his car? he had to stop every 5 miles to bail the gas out)

16" rims will not work on my scout, they're too big

The aids virus is a secret plot by the iranian and vietnamese governments, they invented it, infected their agents, then sent them over here to infect us

and my personal favorite:

Some people are really good with computers. like that little retarded 8 year old boy who broke into the russians system, found the codes for the rockets the russians have on the moon. He re programed them so they'd hit russia instead if they're launched. got an award from the president for doing that.

Unfortuantly, the last time the russians were up there, they discovered what happened, and pointed them back at us. But don't worry folks! that kid will break the codes again, and then we'll be safe again

I keep looking for his crack pipe, but I can't spot it.

NQS

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Jack19
February 22, 2003, 06:10 AM
What planet does he live on? :D

Airwolf
February 22, 2003, 06:25 AM
http://flymeaway.net/images/eek2.gif

http://flymeaway.net/images/Chair.gif

El Tejon
February 22, 2003, 06:48 AM
Ask him about the Glock 7!:D

Tamara
February 22, 2003, 07:20 AM
...most of us have to pay for quality entertainment. ;)

Nathaniel Firethorn
February 22, 2003, 07:36 AM
Why do I suddenly have The Ramones' "Lobotomy" playing in my head? :scrutiny:

- pdmoderator

Quantrill
February 22, 2003, 07:39 AM
Just keep an eye on this guy and keep him away from your loved ones and your home. Quantrill

dakotasin
February 22, 2003, 08:25 AM
this is the kind of guy that i loved to see at work. serious entertainment and break from daily monotony. usually wouldn't take much to get some really great stuff out (quotes). shotguns are usually a great topic w/ these folks, as is big bore hunting (375 or 416 for deer)...

the downside is that if you spend much time w/ him at work, he'll think of you as a friend, which isn't so bad, but then he'll think its ok to stop by your house <-- (this is undesireable).

enjoy, and don't worry about making corrections - wouldn't sink in anyway.

Cliff
February 22, 2003, 08:53 AM
Yeah, what dakotasin said, Remember that movie "The Cable Guy"?

hksw
February 22, 2003, 09:25 AM
Like some have said, keep our distance from him. But, IMO, I wouldn't ignore him, he is a great source for a little comedy.

3 gun
February 22, 2003, 01:04 PM
I think he works with me or he has a brother:what:

Skunkabilly
February 22, 2003, 01:21 PM
Ask him if he has a 'Deagle' or an AWP? :D

Old Fuff
February 22, 2003, 01:44 PM
Gee ... I thought I was a "gun expert" (self-apointed) but I didn't know any of this stuff. Wait until I tell the rest of the guys .....

NotQuiteSane
February 22, 2003, 01:50 PM
Hey,

Did you guys know if you shoot someone with a .45, they'll fall down, but if you use a 9mm, it'll physically pick up the guy and toss him forward?

or that there was never any such person as George Luger, and that walther invented the p38 luger (there's also no such gun as the p.08 luger) after wwII? (damm time traveling Nazi agents, going back in time to resupply their troops!)

Also, any LEO's on board, IF you ever aspired to getting a college degree in your field, sorry, but there are none avadiable. If you have a degree, well, then obviously, you're lying.

NQS

4v50 Gary
February 22, 2003, 02:31 PM
I for one am glad that that "expert" lives in your neighborhood and not mine.

cratz2
February 22, 2003, 02:32 PM
I think he nailed pretty much all of them except HIV was engineered by the French to control the population in their colonies in Africa.

Ohh, and the 8 year old hacker was autistic, not retarted. ;)

Guess this guy needs to get a job in the hunting department of a large sporting goods store.:D

dairycreek
February 22, 2003, 02:38 PM
Not K-Falls. Good shooting;)

coonan357
February 22, 2003, 02:46 PM
NQS , Thanks for the tip Off... hey guys he's in oregon!!! another escapeee from the liberal suburbs of chicago now caught ...:D

bogie
February 22, 2003, 03:42 PM
Oleg - can we add smilies to the list? We need a tinfoil hat one...

Quartus
February 22, 2003, 04:30 PM
Bobby Kennedy was shot with a semi-auto (and not the 9 shot H&R found in sirham's hand)


Well of course, you idiot! Just put your brain in gear and think about it! He couldn't have been shot with a 9 shot revolver because there aren't any! Du-uh! He just told you that a minute ago! Ijit! :rolleyes:


:D



Hey, why not splurge a little. Locate a gunstore that carries 10mm on the shelf. Take him for out for lunch at Denny's one day. On the way, run an "errand". Stop by that little store and buy a box. If you can find a shop that has a 9 shot revolver on the shelf, so much the better. Don't rub it in, don't say "I told you so!". Just buy the ammo in front of him, fondle the 9 shot a little. Maybe ask the proprietor something like, "Hey, isn't that stuff illegal? I heard it's armor piercing." Don't direct your comments to the expert - don't challenge his 'expertise' directly. Just play it cool.


I'll be you don't hear much more from him for a while.



:D

Ed Brunner
February 22, 2003, 05:01 PM
Facts won't change the guy.

ahadams
February 22, 2003, 05:19 PM
Hey nqs - have you thought of talking this guy into applying for one of those 'survivor' type TV shows? could give a whole new meaning to the phrase "reality television".

JamisJockey
February 22, 2003, 07:33 PM
Sure this guy isn't a bonafide Marine Sniper?
Last guy I met like that claimed he was...so I introduced him to a friend that really was...it went downhill from there...
:neener:

mons meg
February 22, 2003, 09:02 PM
A guy at my last job probably believed everything you said, plus he told us with a straight face that the cloud lines streaming behind high flying aircraft are actually gases the Government sprays to make the population more docile.

He also wore sweat pants with very little...ah...support. *shudder*

Zundfolge
February 22, 2003, 09:25 PM
I take it he's one of those guys who thinks the shockwave from a .50bmg is powerful enough to kill you if the bullet travels within a foot of you. :neener:

Quartus
February 22, 2003, 09:30 PM
the shockwave from a .50bmg is powerful enough to kill you


WHAT?!?!??!?

You mean it's not???!?!? :what:





:D

Gewehr98
February 22, 2003, 10:13 PM
Ask him if he has a 'Deagle' or an AWP?


Think I heard some gang-bangers referring to one of those, once. :(

larry_minn
February 22, 2003, 11:26 PM
I take it he's one of those guys who thinks the shockwave from a .50bmg is powerful enough to kill you if the bullet travels within a foot of you.


__________________

It won't kill you but if it happens to me I think I will have to find a shower and new cloths.
Might as well get a Colanoscapy as well as I am sure I would be clean........

goon
February 23, 2003, 12:02 AM
"I take it he's one of those guys who thinks the shockwave from a .50bmg is powerful enough to kill you if the bullet travels within a foot of you. "

Even if it ain't, who would want one passing within a foot of you?;)

NotQuiteSane
February 23, 2003, 01:44 AM
Well of course, you idiot! Just put your brain in gear and think about it! He couldn't have been shot with a 9 shot revolver because there aren't any! Du-uh! He just told you that a minute ago! Ijit!

Yeah, Yeah, Well, see, at first I thougt this was part of the '68 GCA, but no, this law was passed in the 50's

Don't rub it in, don't say "I told you so!"

If he really ticks me off, and I decide to be a A-Strings-Strings, I'll find out if as a retired sherrif he has arresting powers still (or if he's willing to do a citizens arrest)

I've had my eye on a 10mm witness for a while, too low on funds right now, but when I get it, I'll walk over, and let him examine it. when he points out the 2 illegal things, I'll tell him to arrest me. then I'll have him by the short ones.

But probably won't. Other than his "expertise", he's not a bad person, and besides If I can get some money together before tax day, I might be buying property from him

NQS

NotQuiteSane
February 23, 2003, 01:50 AM
Jason,

Sure this guy isn't a bonafide Marine Sniper?

Oh, no. this guy was RECON!

The Seals (Or perhaps the Seels?) wanted him to join, and because he was RECON!, he wouldn't have to go through training. but he turned them down.

NQS

Waitone
February 23, 2003, 03:51 AM
Just off hand I'd be checking my six.

Quartus
February 24, 2003, 07:00 PM
Oh, fer crying out loud! All this time you've had us thinking this guy is a phony! Why didn't you tell us he's RECON! ??

Of COURSE he's right about all this stuff! As a RECON! he is REQUIRED to be an expert in all these areas!


Have you been pulling our leg, NotQuite? :scrutiny:


:D


Say, after you complete the property deal, why not drop a dime on him to one of the phony buster organizations?


Just a thought...

JamisJockey
February 24, 2003, 08:55 PM
:rolleyes:

keep your eye on this one, Joe. He's probably not stable....

Elmer Snerd
February 24, 2003, 11:07 PM
Let slip a few "Fnords (http://www.weasely.com/personal/fnord.html)" or Illuminati references in casual conversation.

Fnord. (http://www.sjgames.com/secret.html)

NotQuiteSane
February 25, 2003, 02:11 AM
Jason,

What do you mean "probably"?

I've learned that every part of ford & chevy's are made in America (and none in Mexico), Like wise, Toyota does not have a plant in Tennesee (I could be wrong there, but I know it's in a SE state), all their stuff in made in China

Despite what it say's here (http://susefaq.sourceforge.net/commonquestions.html#AEN509) and the German adress on the CD case, it is actually pronounced Soo- see, and is a product of Japan.

But the good one was I tried to ask him where I could get case histories of gun fights. the conversationwent like this (as near as I recall)

"Paul, Do you know where I can get info on gunfights?"
"huh, whatcha want that for?"
"well, I try to learn from others mistakes..."
"Oh, well, if you do cowboy shooting you'll do that"
"no, no, I want modern stuff, like post 1980, from street fights"
"oh, the Texas Rangers and the soviets did that to see who was better"
"Were they trying to kill each other?"
"What? no, they use blanks"
"I'm looking for when people are trying to kill each other"
"They can't do that, they use blanks!"

NQS

NotQuiteSane
February 25, 2003, 02:13 AM
Have you been pulling our leg, NotQuite?

I'm gonna see if I can get tape recordings, can anyone here transfer from a mini-casset to .mp3/etc?

Say, after you complete the property deal, why not drop a dime on him to one of the phony buster organizations?

Got Link?

Steel
February 25, 2003, 10:05 AM
When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.

I Corinthains 13:11

Quartus
February 25, 2003, 12:47 PM
Got link?


Ask and ye shall receive!


Cyberseals (http://www.cyberseals.org/)


Did a Google on "phony seals" and found a bunch of sources, actually.

Mute
February 25, 2003, 01:19 PM
Ha! Some expert! Everyone knows it's the .50 S&W that blows your head clean off!

TheFrontRange
February 25, 2003, 01:31 PM
I seem to run into people like this neighbor on a semi-regular basis.

Once while working a second job as a weekend security guard, a fellow guard told me a novel's worth of things he knew about guns...like how in Vietnam he had worked with the Green Berets to develop a 9mm round that worked the destructive power normally attributed to a LAW rocket. He also claimed to possess some sort of new-fangled AKM variant that a close friend of his in the SEALs had recently liberated from its Russian owner just for him. Oh, he and his "squaw" as he referred to his wife/girlfriend/significant other also belonged to some ancient order of Native American spirits or something...by this point in the conversation I was so wierded-out I was just trying to back slowly to my car to get away.

Next was a guy working behind the counter of the local gas station. He launched into story after story of his clandestine work in 'Nam using all kinds of ultra-secret weaponry that he "probably really shouldn't even be talking about" and about how he'd personally killed untold dozens of VC, NVA, and never mind how many "punks" who had ever gotten in his way since the war.

Correia
February 25, 2003, 02:16 PM
.30 Carbine for deer? You guys must small deer out there.

I love experts like this. I had one as a roomate in college. Holy crap they can spew some nonsense! :D

NotQuiteSane
February 25, 2003, 06:01 PM
Now he's saying his Late Brother was a SEAl.

also, he's a big bruce lee/ chuck norris/ etc fan, thinks a bunch of those still living (every time he mentions lee, he looks up, raises his hand and says "God rest his soul". It's hard not to laugh) should get together and make RECON! movie.

Now, I'll admit I think highly of many who were real SF /Seals/ etc. Now I have read many books, but none on the Marine Recon teams, but isn't the idea of Recon to gather intelligence, and not to pick fights? a "rambo" wouldn't last 5 minutes in the units, assuming he even made it through training, no?

NQS

Quartus
February 25, 2003, 06:42 PM
I my experience, the Real Deals don't usually talk much about their exploits, except among themselves.


I did some time in the Reserves, after a rather routine 4 years in peacetime mech infantry. (Just after Nam.) I joined the reserves to do what I should have stayed in to do - become a Green Beret. I was assigned to a Special Forces reserve outfit with the understanding that I would later attend airborne training and Special Warfare school. (There were a half dozen of us 'legs' in the unit.) So let's be clear - I am NOT claiming to have been a Green Beret. For personal reasons, I didn't stay with it long enough to go to training. I did spend quite a few weekend drills with them, and got to play one summer's war games with them.

But I got to walk among them, and most of the guys were Nam vets. I got to listen to their stories, and some of them were pretty amazing. One of the guys had been Recon in Nam, and they did NOT just gather intel! They lived to fight! Not too bright, sometimes. Our company commander had been an A team leader in Nam, and his team got dropped into what was supposed to be a quiet DZ, with the intent of going quietly about their business. Oops. Seems there was a Recon team already there - involved in a firefight with an NVA battalion. Well, what was left of them - they were down to 3 men still living. The captain called for evac immediately. When the choppers got there, he had to pull rank and order the Recon guys to get on board. They wanted to stay and continue the fight against a BATALLION! :what: :rolleyes:



BTW, that unit was C company, 1st BN, 11 SFG(A) out of Ft. MacAurthur, California. They were later moved to Los Alamitos Reserve station, which had previously been the Los Alamitos Naval Air Station. Most of the guys, in their civilian jobs, were cops of one kind or another. From Federal Marshalls (don't ask about his work!) to a rookie at the L.A. county jail. My two immediate supervisors were Long Beach vice cops. Tough hombres. One of them was a real nice guy, though. :D

TexasVet
February 26, 2003, 12:10 AM
------------------------------------------------------------------
the Real Deals don't usually talk much about their exploits, except among themselves.
------------------------------------------------------------------

You got that right. I've got one in the family right now and his emails from "somewhere in southwest Asia" sound like he's kicking back and getting some sun. Hah!
I was once in a Navy hospital with a real Seal during the VN war who tended to ramble when he got his demerol shot. Scared the heck out me to be in the same room with him til I got to know him a little!:what:

Admiral Thrawn
February 26, 2003, 12:30 AM
I hate idiots like that... I have had the displeasure of knowing several. (Or perhaps, I regret them ever knowing me? ):p

Minute_Of_Torso
February 26, 2003, 12:37 AM
Ex-Navy . . .


That about says it all! :neener:

Powderman
February 26, 2003, 06:31 AM
Yeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaah..................


I knew one of those guys once. While I was in the Service, I ran into this guy who always had one up on you. When I talked about the cars I liked, he told me about his special Pontiac LeMans.

With the 70 gallon gas tank.
That would do a quarter mile in about 4 seconds.

Then, we talked about reloading. He told me about his favorite .357 load.

With 158 grain bullets.

On top of 33 :what: grains of Green Dot.

I asked what kind of bullets, and he said that he used 158 grain JHP, with mercury in the tips.

I said that the load must develop a lot of velocity; did he lube them? :evil: He replied, "Of course".

Ho-kay........................:confused:

sanchezero
February 26, 2003, 05:07 PM
I love the idea of Force Recon tiptoeing around the MiddleEast with a bunch of BB guns.

:D

NotQuiteSane
February 27, 2003, 12:37 AM
Today I learned that machine guns & sawed off shotguns are not legal to own anywhere in the US

Forgot to ask him about the .50 passing withing a foot

NQS

Mike Irwin
February 27, 2003, 01:07 PM
Invite him to join up here, Sane.

NotQuiteSane
February 28, 2003, 04:23 AM
Dunno. He keeps saying I should get DSL, I point out it's not avadiable on our street, he counters with "Q-west (he insists thats the proper pronouniation) sent me a card offering it, so it's avadiable"

I learned today the .44 Russian was not Produced by S&W for the Russian market, insted, it's named for the country that produced it.

NQS

Quartus
February 28, 2003, 08:21 AM
Wow, NotQuite, we are BOTH getting an education here! I worked for 'Q-West' for a year and a half, in fact, during the period when it changed from US Waste to ''Q-West". (Well, got bought by 'Q-West'.)

We all thought it was pronounced like Quest! I mean, all those commercials, and the announcements about the name change and everything! Who'd have thought we could all be so wrong? :what:


I wonder if Joe Nacchio knows this? :D

Killians97
February 28, 2003, 11:34 AM
Dick was here in Arlington, VA 3 weeks ago and he too was wrong with the way he pronouced it! I didn't have the guts to correct him. :D

NotQuiteSane
March 6, 2003, 09:15 PM
I take it he's one of those guys who thinks the shockwave from a .50bmg is powerful enough to kill you if the bullet travels within a foot of you.

I asked about this today. No, it can't. but Why would you want a .50 Browning, when a .357 is "so much more powerful?"

I also learned that IHC never made a longbed crew cab PU (so this pic http://tigger.tmcom.com/~tsm1/scout/jpg/74tette/7_5_2001/tette01.jpg of my freinds truck is a fake) Also, IHC boughyt the design from GM, instead of doing as I had previously though and having their own version be the first (1959)


I have so much to learn....
:neener:

NQS

voilsb
March 6, 2003, 10:10 PM
sounds like you've got some funny stories coming from this guy. keep 'em coming, but don't get mean on the guy asking him questions. and like Mike Irwin says, invite him here so he can learn some stuff, too. it really is a shame to have gunowners living in quite so much ignorance.

NotQuiteSane
March 26, 2003, 12:23 AM
Well, this thread was fun, so I hate to post this here.

The Expert (Paul) has been in the hospital unconcious since yesterday morning. he's been very inactive for the past 2 weeks, I understand he wasn't getting o2 to his brain.

I'm not the kind to engage in religious superstitions, being an athiest, but if you feel diffrent, he'd probably appreciate your prayers.

He's an onery old crudmodgen, and all of us in the area would miss him

NQs

Mike Irwin
March 26, 2003, 12:39 AM
Athiesism is, in its own way, a religion, Sane.

So you needn't feel badly about asking for intervention for your neighbor.

Weimadog
March 26, 2003, 12:41 AM
Russian Missiles on the Moon?
Russian Missiles on the Moon?
Russian Missiles on the Moon?



You have made it very difficult for me to sleep tonight! :cuss:

Weimadog

Weimadog
March 26, 2003, 12:55 AM
"no, no, I want modern stuff, like post 1980, from street fights"
"oh, the Texas Rangers and the soviets did that to see who was better"
"Were they trying to kill each other?"
"What? no, they use blanks"
"I'm looking for when people are trying to kill each other"
"They can't do that, they use blanks!"

Hmmm, that's plausible...

Somewhere in the heart of Texas "Fellow Ranger, I wonder how we would do in a real gunfight."
"Why don't we call up the Soviets, challenge them to a shootout."
(dial, dial, ring ring ring)
"Helloski?"
"This is Patrolman Hammond, of the Texas Rangers, would you like to have a gun fight?"
"Da! American Imperialist always come up with such good ideas for fun! Brother Ivan not want gore and death, so fight with only blanks, okay?"
"Good! Come over around noon tomorrow, we'll do some shootin' and have a barbeque!"

It could happen...

Weimadog

S_O_Laban
March 26, 2003, 12:59 AM
Weimadog, sleep tight my friend, we all "know" those are pointed to the "least and left coasts". Thoses of you on the coasts "watch your six":D :D

Strings
March 26, 2003, 06:38 PM
I had someone at the local coffee shop come up with the "50 BMG shockwave" thing last night. And here, I always that people who believed that one were just a myth...:rolleyes:

Greg L
March 26, 2003, 06:51 PM
The Expert (Paul) has been in the hospital unconcious since yesterday morning. he's been very inactive for the past 2 weeks, I understand he wasn't getting o2 to his brain. (bold mine)

Well, it would explain quite a bit. :rolleyes:

Good thoughts heading his way.

Greg

NotQuiteSane
March 27, 2003, 12:18 AM
Well, he opened his eyes and squozre his wife's hand, but he's still not in the clear

NQS

Carlos Cabeza
March 27, 2003, 02:12 PM
UNCLE PAUL !!!!!! I wondered where you moved to........:D

JamisJockey
March 27, 2003, 02:21 PM
Joe,
Glad to see you're out and about again. Things getting back on track out there?

Bonker
March 27, 2003, 02:52 PM
I have a buddy like that. I've just learned to let him talk and not to try and argue because you can NEVER convince some people of anything.
Some people just have pretend to know it all.

2nd Amendment
March 27, 2003, 03:44 PM
A question that might have been asked elsewhere: Are you sure the old guy isn't just pulling everyones leg? I knew a fellow a few years ago who was like this and I generally just nodded and went along. One day he asked me "Hey, kid, you know I'm not serious 'bout all this crap, right?"

I said "Huh?" I really had no clue where he was headed this time.

He just shook his head and said something like "I get a kick out of watching peoples faces when you bury 'em in bull****, especially when they believe half the load I feed 'em".

I said "So it's all just you having your own personal joke on the world?"

"Yep"

He told me he'd deny it if I ever told anyone...and that everyone would believe him if he did deny it because, after all, everyone knew he either knew it all or was crazy...and nobody could ever be sure which. :D I'm not sure of much else about him but I do know the old SOB was definitely enjoying himself and all the consternation he caused.

Glamdring
May 9, 2003, 12:29 AM
My buddy ran into an "expert" working at a gun shop. Told him that you couldn't shoot 44 specials in 44 mag.

I had told that buddy about how my 4" 629 did everything for me EXCEPT CCW. And made a nice nightstand gun loaded with 44 specials.
Since he had CCW guns already he was looking for something a bit more powerful for deer hunting and plinking.

Feanaro
May 9, 2003, 02:04 AM
I believe we need a new term for such a person as this. "Armchair Commando" and "Mall Ninja" don't cut it. I think "Mallchair Super Commando" sounds good to me. ;)

I thankfully have never met such a person. And would gladly never do so. :)

dinosaur
May 9, 2003, 05:43 AM
The guy I absolutely despise is ex CIA:rolleyes: who last year sold his father`s WWII Gov`t Model for $200 and it wasn`t to ME!!!. :banghead:

jacketch
May 9, 2003, 06:25 AM
I work with an 'expert'. He is constantly making subtle remarks about his service exploits; you would think he has been everywhere and done everything. Then if you ask for any details he will quickly say that he cannot divulge anything because it was all top secret stuff and he would go directly to jail if he spilled the beans.

He also has owned every hypervelocity uberarm ever made but no longer has them.

Sounds like a bunch of BS to me!

Sisco
May 9, 2003, 06:51 AM
This guy your talking about has got to be my brother-in-law.
Don't tell him you know me, when we moved we didn't give him our new address.
:evil:

citizen
May 9, 2003, 08:06 AM
How the heck did I miss this before???????:uhoh: :what:

Partisan Ranger
May 9, 2003, 04:23 PM
I think you need to buy your neighbor a couple gifts:

- a roll of tin foil for his hat
- and a camera to take a picture of those black helicopters only he sees

NotQuiteSane
May 28, 2003, 02:37 AM
The Expert comes home tomorrow. be patient, in a week or so I may have more for you guys

NQS

OEF_VET
May 28, 2003, 07:32 AM
I work with a similar guy. When I first met him, he was saying he was an active duty E9, attached to the TN Homeland Security Office from Special Ops Command. He told everyone he had an issue M4 in the trunk of his privately owned car (against regs), used his personal laptop to store Top Secret data (highly against regs), and went on drug raids with local LEO's (also against regs - Posse Comitatus Act). After I started working for the company and was able to put the holes in his stories, everyone else woke up to his BS, now he's a running joke at work. Turns out, he was active Army during Gulf 1 as a Vulcan ADA crewmember, got out, went AF Reserve as a medic, then transferred to a TN Army Reserve unit, also as a medic. He's actually an E-5 and is his units Retention NCO.

I call people like that 'Special Feces' cause they're full of it.

Frank

Sarge
May 28, 2003, 08:00 AM
that he's on the prayer list. BS'er or not, he don't sound like somebody who'd vote for gun-banners, and I think we are more or less obligated to overlook a few 'personality warts' anyway. Feet generally solve more personal issues of this sort than harsh words do, and if the guy annoyed me too much I'd just avoid him. Jerry Springer would be out of business if people took this to a happy extreme.

I have been asked (for the court record) if I am a firearms 'expert'. The question itself is irrelevant because we all know that there are so many individual areas of expertise that no one person is an expert in all of them. My pat answer is that I don't consider myself one, but I'lll leave that for the lawyers to argue, and the court to decide.

That answer is based largely on a definition of the word that I learned when I was about 10 years old. Like so many other great thoughts, it was penned by Mark Twain-

"Expert- the village idiot, ten miles from home."

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Don Gwinn
May 28, 2003, 10:37 AM
Turns out, he was active Army during Gulf 1 as a Vulcan ADA
crewmember, got out, went AF Reserve as a medic, then transferred to a TN
Army Reserve unit, also as a medic. He's actually an E-5 and is his units
Retention NCO.

See, that's what makes no sense about a lot of these wannabes. Is he not proud of that? That's a lot of service. Why would a guy who did all that need to make up stories?

Coronach
May 28, 2003, 10:43 AM
Lemme see if I get this right...

Your handle is "NotQuiteSane"?

I...wonder what his would be? :uhoh:

Mike :D

Quartus
May 29, 2003, 10:51 PM
his units Retention NCO.

"Retention NCO"??? What is THAT?!!? I was the Reenlistment NCO for a short time, but what in the Politically Correct :barf: world is a Retention NCO?!?!?


:barf: :barf: :barf:




I call people like that 'Special Feces' cause they're full of it.




Hmmm. I think a cliché is born! :D

NotQuiteSane
June 18, 2003, 12:11 AM
Well, I told you guys to be patient.

today I learned the Expert has killed a grizzly bear with a revolver chambered in 375 wetherbhy magnum. I mistakenly assumed he meant 357 win mag, but no, it was a 375 weatherby mag, same gun issued to the police

NQS

pax
June 18, 2003, 01:04 AM
NQS,

I'm glad he's feeling better and up to his old self again. The world would be a poorer place without him.

:D :D :D

Thanks for the tales.

pax

For every credibility gap, there is a gullibility fill. -- R. Clopton

hksw
June 18, 2003, 12:32 PM
Should have asked him for pics.

Skunkabilly
June 18, 2003, 01:35 PM
Glad he's doing better! Has he dropped a black rhino with a .9mm cop killer yet?

El Tejon
June 18, 2003, 02:06 PM
NQS, that's great. Please keep them coming. Which gun rag does he edit?

RandyB
June 18, 2003, 08:08 PM
You know if you provide him with an aluminum foil hat to keep his brain from being bombarded by radio signals from the U.S. Govt. he would begin to feel much better..... :D

OEF_VET
June 18, 2003, 11:28 PM
Quartus -- Reenlistment NCO / Retention NCO = same creature, different name, still tries to con people into forgetting everything they've griped about for the past several years, so they'll sign on for another several years of griping.

Ryder
June 18, 2003, 11:45 PM
I've only ran into one guy like that. In the end I couldn't figure out what his problem was and just chalked it up to him being a lefty. Is "the expert" a southpaw by any chance?

Hehe, just testing a theory ;)

stevelyn
June 19, 2003, 10:09 AM
Expert

Ex-is a has been.
Spert- is a drip under pressure. Do the math.:scrutiny:

iapetus
April 13, 2004, 07:24 PM
Whenever someone in the UK threatens the police/public with replica firearm, and gets shot by police marksmen:

Someone will write to the papers / phone in to TV shows saying:

"The police are trained marksmen. They should have shot the gun out of his hand." (Or shot him in the leg, etc)

(And usually followed up soon after with "We should ban replica firearms!")



[i]Editeded: Oops - wrong thread. That was meant to go in the " What is the silliest thing you've heard in a gun discussion?" thread.[i/]

itgoesboom
April 13, 2004, 09:11 PM
Whats funny is that I used to know someone like this, back when I was in high school. He didn't say as much about weapons and such, but he claimed to be CIA/FBI/SEEL/RECON whatever.

Well, I decided my senior year in HS to enlist in the reserves, and lo and behold, I scored well enough on my tests to get intel analyst (96B i believe). Well, due to physical injuries, I was unable to go to basic, so obviously never got into the service. But I was going into the delayed entry program, so it was several months before my injuries became severe enough. It was only like 60 days before I was supposed to ship out.

Well, I think it was the day after I enlisted, this guy comes into my work place and says "hey, congrats on getting intel, I hear that you are going to be down @ so-and-so base, with so-and-so unit".

But I hadn't told anyone yet, cuz I didn't want anyone to know that I was going to be in a position to get a TS clearance (i figured I would get all sorts of gruff over that).

So what still bothers me today, How the HELL did he find out and know??:scrutiny:

I.G.B.

BluesBear
April 14, 2004, 03:57 AM
Hmmm NQS seems to have gone missing.

Mizzoutiger
April 14, 2004, 02:55 PM
Beware the undead thread!

It's a zombie!

:D

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