Dumb things to tell a gun dealer


December 29, 2002, 10:08 PM
"Do you have any Ravens?"
"I'd like to trade in my Kimber for a Glock"
"I've got my gun and ear and eye protection with me, so if you've got a range down here, I'd like to tryout your bullet proof vests please"
"If it were all upto me, no one would have guns!"
"Do you have any "pre-ban" magazines for my revolver? I heard they were rare"
"Hang on, let me load this round in here and try it out- no, no, I know what I'm doing"
"I think there's something wrong with the ejector- the casing keeps getting jammed- The brand? It's a revolver, I think"
"Do you have any Black Talons? No? They're supposed to be strong enough to rip a full grown African Rhino in two and keep tearing it apart until there's nothing left- It's the best hunting round ever."
"I'd like to return my 1911- the trigger doesn't work. I have to cock the hammer? My gun didn't come with a hammer"
"You gave me corrosive and defective bullets. Whenever I fire, the bullet pops out the side, and the metal part somehow dissolves away."
"If I were to drive my Ford Explorer from that street down there to here at full speed, do you think those metal door bars would fall over?"
"Stick em up! Hurry or I'll stab you GOOD with this knife!"

Feel free to share your own ;-)

If you enjoyed reading about "Dumb things to tell a gun dealer" here in TheHighRoad.org archive, you'll LOVE our community. Come join TheHighRoad.org today for the full version!
December 29, 2002, 10:17 PM

"I'd like to trade in my Kimber for a Glock"


Hey, I have done that!

December 29, 2002, 10:19 PM
Oops- I didn't mean to offend you or anything- I'm one of those people who believe that Glocks are ugly.

December 29, 2002, 10:19 PM
Let's see, I've heard:

I just got outta jail this morning & learned how truly dangerous the streets of LA really are...what do I need to buy a gun? (Actually heard that once during one of my many trips into a gun shop)

Do you guys sell that adapter so I can shoot 9 mm from my 45?

December 29, 2002, 10:22 PM
Haha! How about a .50 caliber conversion- for a .22? :cool:

December 29, 2002, 10:31 PM
I'd like something with alot of power for a home defense gun. What kind of .22's do you have in stock? :D

December 29, 2002, 10:33 PM
"I can get it cheaper off the net"

December 29, 2002, 10:44 PM
After seeing an XYZ rifle in a dealers display case,look at him/her and ask.. "Will you order me one of those? I want to pay wholesale too!"

"Can you tell me the prices of other dealers in town on that exact same gun?"

:D :D :D

December 29, 2002, 10:49 PM
"How much? X? Wal-Mart sells it for X-5..."


Standing Wolf
December 29, 2002, 10:54 PM
"Do you have any idiot-proof guns?"

December 29, 2002, 11:39 PM
If their markup is unbelievably higher than either Shotgun News, Gun List, GunsAmerica, or Davidson's, darn right I'll let that dealer know they're trying to pay the shop lease, utilities, kid's braces, payroll, college fund, and insurance premiums on the sale of that one gun.

I'm not afraid to tell them. I also hold an FFL, it ain't exactly a big secret how things work in the gun retail business. ;)

December 29, 2002, 11:58 PM
-"Can you put put it back together?"
"-dunno how come it came apart...got home and thats the way I found it".
- "got a spring for my xxx, dog must have snatched it while I turned my back?"
-" Got a note from my mom saying its OK for me to buy a gun"

December 30, 2002, 12:04 AM
Never heard anything like those things at my favorite gun shop.

Do I need to find one that's more fun?

Would that be a fun gun shop?

December 30, 2002, 12:07 AM
Gewehr98 - I think I've been to the gunshops you're talking about! When I posted that I was thinking about the customer in the shop yesterday that bragged to everyone in earshot that he could buy nearly everything in the shop, from guns to bottles of Hoppes "cheaper on the net".
Before buying I usually check auctionarms, gunbroker etc. usually the sale price is a little under the local dealer but by the time you add shipping & transfer fees it usually evens out. If the price is a whole lot cheaper, darn right I'd let him know!

December 30, 2002, 12:12 AM
When one of our favorite gun shops closed down and asked why owner said "with some of this bunch that comes in here...my ribs hurt from laughing so much".

Heck we'd go buy and place bets as to how long before the dumb question of the day was asked;)

December 30, 2002, 12:15 AM
"Can I see that one? How much? Wow,I can get that $15 cheaper on the net"

"well how are you gonna get it transfered to you"

"Dont you do that?"

"Yes, its $25"

"Wow, you have a lot of nerve trying to charge me"

What caliber is that 45/70?

December 30, 2002, 12:16 AM
I was at my local gunshop a few weeks ago. It happened to be the weekend of a local gunshow. The phone was ringing regularly with people asking how to get to the gunshow.
The workers answering the phones were helpful and patient but, man, it takes a lot of nerve to call a shop and basically say "Hello, I have money to spend on what you are selling. Could you please give me directions to your biggest competitor so I can spend it there and not with you?"

December 30, 2002, 12:38 AM
I told a pawnbroker the other day that the like new Kiber he has was priced to low(about 4to500 dollars to low)STUPID(ME)

December 30, 2002, 01:20 AM
Hey..can I see that gun on your hip?

Watch this neat trick I learned....

You have any "Cop Killer" bullets for sale?

My dad has a Glock just like that he brought back from Vietnam. Got it from a NVA Colenol.

I want to buy this gun for a freind of mine who can't buy a gun. It's a bogus charge of course, so that's why I'm buying it for him.

Good Shooting

December 30, 2002, 01:23 AM
Can I get that pistol in sky blue? You know, to bring out my eyes.

December 30, 2002, 01:47 AM
It gets curiouser and curiouser!;)

December 30, 2002, 01:51 AM
Thanks for taking the time to show me all the different guns. Now I know exactly what I want, and I'm going to have my friend order me one.

Usually followed by...

I bought this gun, but I need someone to show me how it works.

And my favorite...

This gun I bought isn't working right, and the guy I bought it from won't help me.

1st runner up...

What do you mean you want $50 and 2 weeks to put a pad on this gun? You said it would cost $10 and be ready when I got the gun if I bought it from you. Why should I pay more and have to wait?

December 30, 2002, 02:00 AM
"I’d like something for my wife that’s small, powerful, easy to use, and doesn’t recoil for under $100.00."

December 30, 2002, 02:10 AM
While on a recent trip to the local gun shop, I heard someone asking about 1911's:

"Well I heard 1911's are a bear to take apart, and I'm half stupid anyway"

Me and the employee who was on the phone calling in my NICS check just looked at each other dumbfounded. I swear he almost dropped the phone.

December 30, 2002, 02:27 AM
Non verbal....picking up that new custom 45 on display, pulling back the slide to ensure that its unloaded, then simultaneously hitting the slide release and letting the slide slam forward on the empty chamber while rotating the pistol 90 degrees to the side in the best gangsta style.....

December 30, 2002, 02:30 AM
Hold my beer and watch this......Don't worry, I know what I'm doing..........

December 30, 2002, 06:01 AM
Hold my beer and watch this......Don't worry, I know what I'm doing.......... http://www.stopstart.freeserve.co.uk/smilie/moreek.gif


December 30, 2002, 06:01 AM
"you got any of those kind that so-n-so used in that one movie?"

"if this one isn't what I really like can I bring it back?"

"this one's a little too heavy,you got one just like it that weights less?"

"Ok I'll take this one,now what kind of bullets does it take?"

"why is the Kimber so much more than the Lorcin?"

"you want how much for it?"

December 30, 2002, 06:23 AM
Originally posted by Schuey2002
After seeing an XYZ rifle in a dealers display case,look at him/her and ask.. "Will you order me one of those? I want to pay wholesale too!"

"Can you tell me the prices of other dealers in town on that exact same gun?"

:D :D :D

I hear this EVERY day! Although not with guns but with cars!:)
I've gotten very used to the question.

December 30, 2002, 06:51 AM
there's no such thing as a stupid question should work a gun counter for a week. I have a friend that worked our store for a few years. Asked him why he quit. "I had all the stupid questions I could handle"

the "why can't you sell cheaper than Wal-Mart?" is rather common

absolutely unbelievable how many people don't even know what ammo their gun takes

the thing about the gun shows rings very true,

BUT THE BEST.......I love the chimps that are going on a multi-thousand dollar trip out West....."I need some 30-06 ammo for my elk hunt...leaving tomorrow, first thing"

what ..brand...bullet????

"Hell, it don't matter...whatever the cheapest is you've got"

December 30, 2002, 07:50 AM
"This question asks if I was ever committed, it was XXX years ago, does it still count?" Dealer told him to write 'NO' and sold him the gun.:eek:

December 30, 2002, 08:10 AM
"....My ex-Brother-In-Law's 4th cousin is supposed to be paroled from [insert prison name here] tomorrow. Said he wants to visit with the judge and some members of the jury for a 'shoot-around'.
Whatcha got that will take 30+ round clips?....."

December 30, 2002, 08:59 AM
"Hey Meester, if I buy a gun do I really have to feel out the form?"
"Then can my girlfriend fill it out for me?"
No joke, I've heard that one.

2nd Amendment
December 30, 2002, 10:22 AM
I wanna trade this rifle for a pistol...

How much ya want out of it...

I don't care, I'm gonna trade regardless...


Dear God, I said that once!

Don Gwinn
December 30, 2002, 11:00 AM
Remember a couple of weeks ago I came in asking about an 870? Well, Wal-Mart had it for $20 less last weekend, so I bought this Remington 870 at Wal-Mart, and the stock cracked. Wal-Mart tried to send it back, but Remington wouldn't take it in this Winchester box that Wal-Mart sold it to me in. Wal-Mart won't give me a Remington box, even though they sold me a Remington shotgun, and they won't send it back to Remington. Would you box it up and send it back for the warranty repair for me?

(This one is a real example. A customer actually said this, paraphrased of course, in Gwinn's Guns and Tackle sometime in 1995.)

December 30, 2002, 11:06 AM
I need one of those bullet clip things for my gun, Its about this long & fits in the handle , I don't know the make or model, That one looks like it will fit, its about a 9 guage size......:p

Don Gwinn
December 30, 2002, 11:09 AM
The worst thing a customer can say is not to the owner. The absolute worst, in my humble opinion, is the idiot who wants to sit on a barstool at the counter for hours each day drinking free gunshop coffee and tell everyone who looks at a gun how it's too expensive and he'd be getting cheated if he bought it.

Or "you wouldn't want to try to handle that caliber, it's a bear."

Or "you don't want something that fancy."

Or "Those are cheap junk."

December 30, 2002, 11:20 AM
Don Gwinn I'm guilty of that one on several occasions.

I can't help myself when I'm sitting there and I see a young couple come in and go right to the wrong gun for them.

Yeah, it's prolly none of my business but I want gun owners to train with eir guns not waste money and end up huring themselves because they don't feel comfortable with what they got stuffed into.

I've never had the onwer or any of the staff tell me to shut my pie hole so I guess they all feel the same way too.

P.S. I pay for my coffee.;)

December 30, 2002, 11:37 AM
Gun shops are good entertainment. I go and just listen to the wannabe buyers.

Especially at a gun show, it really gets good. And not only from the buyers.

Don Gwinn
December 30, 2002, 11:43 AM
Orion, maybe you just waited until it made sense to say something, and the owners figured it was OK since they would have said it too.
This guy didn't.

Neal Bloom
December 30, 2002, 12:24 PM
Actually had a gunshop owner tell me that I could find a gun cheaper on the Internet. He would bring it in for me for $25.00. Sort of took me by surprise.

December 30, 2002, 04:20 PM
Was in a gun shop a few years ago, and was by myself just browsing. In walks this obvious gang-banger walks to the counter and asks for a box of 38s. The Dealer says 38 what? I dont know 38s, says the gang-banger. The dealer says" 38 special, 38 super, 38 what???." Gang banger says " 38 super yeah thats it." Dealer sold them to the guy. Now I am not familiar with 38 Super (shoot 9mm and 45auto myself ocasionally dable in 44 mag-deer hunting) but I wonder what the consequences would be by loading 38 super into a revolver that is caliber 38 special. Would they even fit properly?? I thought what an idiot, I would never put rounds in a firearm unless I knew what they were and where they came from. I heard a guy blew the cylinder out of his 44mag firing rounds he got reloaded from a friend. Sheeple.

Nathaniel Firethorn
December 30, 2002, 04:36 PM
"I want to special-order an HK."

Mea culpa, mea maxima culpa...

- pdmoderator

December 30, 2002, 05:55 PM
Guy lays away nice .38, makes payments, big day arrives and he pays it off. He goes home and that evening commits suicide with the .38. True story, so much for the waiting period.:(

December 30, 2002, 06:24 PM
Originally posted by DevilMayCry
Was in a gun shop a few years ago, and was by myself just browsing. In walks this obvious gang-banger walks to the counter and asks for a box of 38s. The Dealer says 38 what? I dont know 38s, says the gang-banger. The dealer says" 38 special, 38 super, 38 what???." Gang banger says " 38 super yeah thats it."....

DevilMayCry, 38super is a popular caliber with the hispanic folks, mostly gang bangers, either 38super or 7.62x39.

December 30, 2002, 11:40 PM
-"Can you put put it back together?"

Hey re1973: I had to do that last year, and I may have to do it again with another one. So, I guess I can be "dumb."

Do you know my wife? She sees me with a screwdriver and asks "Are you sure we shouldn't just call someone?"

It pains me to admit it, but you're probably right; this is one area where I can be pretty dumb. It is really embarrassing to have to bring a gun back and ask if they can put it back together. In my limited defense, at least I'm not one of those guys may who reassemble a gun, find two "extra" springs and a "whatchacallit," and shoot it anyway.

I'm really good at taking them apart, though.;)

December 30, 2002, 11:55 PM
"Did you know your pistol is cocked?" said to me many-many-many times carrying a cocked-n-locked 1911 while working behind the counter.

December 31, 2002, 12:14 AM
Bringing a rifle up to the counter and asking if they had it in stock. I did this, actually.

January 1, 2003, 06:19 AM
Origianlly posted by Traveler:

"1st runner up...

What do you mean you want $50 and 2 weeks to put a pad on this gun? You said it would cost $10 and be ready when I got the gun if I bought it from you. Why should I pay more and have to wait?"

Um, I'm a bit foggy on this, could somebody explain? Customer sounds like he's got a right to be angry, unless I'm missing something or took it out of context. Thanks.
Cheers, everyone.

January 1, 2003, 07:30 AM
Griff -
I don't run a gun shop, but I have worked retail. Guy wants to buy from me, i get to turn my inventory and get a new customer; I can dig a bit deeper to make the sale. Guy announces (by his actions) he places no value on long term business relationships, there is no reason I should make an investment in him; he gets the regular repair desk price.

Guy in Piedras Negras calls for help setting up copier he bought from a jobber in New York. I find he put the developer in the toner hopper (kinda like filling the gas tank with oil) and laid a full hand print on the drum (effectively ruining a $150.00 item). Yeah - I added our special 'necio' (ashpole) fee to his bill.

Customer proudly reveals (as I am debriefing a service call due to the spitty quality of their copier paper) that they buy it from Quill because shipping is free. I mention that our normal store price is better than what they pay, and the paper is better quality; and mentally cross them off my good-guy list.

January 1, 2003, 07:39 AM
Sometimes it's the other way around, especially with Pawn Shops!
I found a Chinese T53 Mosin-Nagant carbine at a local pawnshop - tagged as "Japanese Rifle"! I asked to see it, and told the clerk what it really was - he asks me "Is it a rifle or a shotgun?" :rolleyes:

I bought it as much to save it from such idiots as to add to my collection. ;)

January 1, 2003, 10:26 AM
Re: buying local instead of off the net
a little OT

[for the last 3 years I have always checked locally. first
I'd much rather keep the $ here, then send it out of state
in all, but one case I've had to go elsewhere for my firearms
some of the mark-ups around here are just incredible :rolleyes:
even when figuring in shipping, transfers, etc.
10-20% more, does add up
makes me wonder how some of them stay in business
but then, there's one born every minute
and it does pay to ask the right questions]

"...do you mind if I shoot it while I'm here? I want to see if it works, I brought my own ammo..."

have tape, will always try again...

Don Gwinn
January 1, 2003, 11:17 AM
Griff, shop owners get a little tired of customers who won't spend money with them but want their level of service.

Dad was not an expert on handguns, but when it came to shotguns, rimfires, .22 mag and fishing tackle he was the local genius. If you had no idea what you wanted, you could walk into dad's shop and leave with the right stuff. He's not a gunsmith, but he would do very small stuff like replacing sights--stuff he'd done on his own guns forever. When a gunsmithing job came in he'd recommend a gunsmith a couple of towns over.

Wal-Mart, on the other hand, puts kids who know nothing about firearms behind a counter because they had too many people in housewares and somebody quit in sporting goods.

So everyone would come to dad and spend an hour or two of their time picking his brains, then they'd go to Wal-Mart to buy what they'd decided on with dad. And it was honestly surprising how many people bought the wrong gun, or the wrong barrel length, or whatever. But when that happened, did they go back to Wal-Mart?
No, that would be pointless. They came to dad, and if he wouldn't bend over backward to do the work for them or trade even up for the gun they'd wanted in the first place (because, although Wal-Mart was a lot cheaper, they didn't actually have the gun the goober had wanted) they'd stomp out mad.

Everyone from Microsoft on down gives breaks for their customers. There's absolutely nothing wrong with it, and if someone is mad about it then he's got a long hill to climb.

January 2, 2003, 03:49 AM
I've used the "I can get it cheaper off the net." statement before. The gun dealer wanted about 160 over the MSRP. I told him point blank that with his transfer fee, shipping+ insurance and gun cost I could get the gun for 300-325. He shrugged his shoulder, smiled and told me if I put money on the counter I coulds have it for 25 over what I stated(actually 354 out the door). I bought the gun from him. I have, since that time, taken 4 different people to his shop to buy guns and everytime he tells us what price he will take for the gun instead of trying to push the marked up price he has on it. I have seen guys run in and pay the tagged price....wish I could afford to do that.

January 2, 2003, 09:54 AM
I have used the "cheaper to order one" line too, when I saw a Yugo 48A (issued, in very good condition) for $399 :scrutiny: :scrutiny: I offered to buy it for what they paid + $25 + taxes and shipping from the distributor, and also would buy a military type sling and some ammo for retail money. They declined and told me that someone would pay what they wanted and had no interest in doing low margin sales. Last time I went in there, and recommend to others that they not go as well.

January 5, 2003, 09:41 AM
Oh, so it's an ethical thing. Thanks everyone.

Hk Paul
January 5, 2003, 12:06 PM
I can get it cheeper over the net.

Also my co-worker was with a coustomer for like 40 mins. The coustomer came back a coupple of weeks later with the same gun they where talking about...

January 5, 2003, 12:55 PM
I want that stainless steel gun (due to the misconception that people have about stainless steel not rusting)

Then seeing the same person coming back to the shop wondering why there is brown spots on the gun.:what:

The Cheaper on the net thing....hehehe
I was at a shop in the Sacramento area, they have this huge shop, but havent been in business for very long. To my surprise in the pistol cabnet I saw a NIB Kimber TLE for $899. (usual price for this gun around town is 700 and change) This was the advertised SALE PRICE!!! First thought was what kind of sucker would spend close to 1K after taxes and DOJ fees for a slightly modified stock Kimber. I looked at an XD40 for 500 dollars. (4" garden variety). I said hey I just got one of those. He said what did u pay. I said something like a little over 350 and some change. Kid said dude I could have beat that price by at least 50 bucks and given you a box of ammo.
Then precedes to tell me how to modify magazines for the XD40 and how he can special order me anything I want but wont give me a set price for anything...due to market demand. But claims to beat any game in town. I left and will never go back.

I have done many sales online. Probably the best service that I have ever recieved. Keeps the small FFL dealers in business. I would never say to a gun dealer I can get it cheaper online, but Why spend more when you save the money to increase your collection.

To the stores credit the owner is a really nice guy too bad the "kid" is giving him a bad name by his arrogance.

Flash Hole
January 5, 2003, 01:32 PM
I dont want to wait a week, I'M MAD NOW !
Homer J. Simpson

January 6, 2003, 06:40 AM
I've done the "uhh, I need help putting it back together again" routine (Ruger MkII).

I also walked into a paintball store and announced, relatively loudly, "I took apart my gun and attempted to modify it and have pretty clearly f**ked it up. Could you help me fix it, please?" Apparently I was a fairly rare breed -- most people do the "Uhh, I don't know how that happened" schtick.

I recently purchased a gun on the net for the first time. I did the math and found that I saved about 30% ($419 vs. $607 -- and yes, this includes the shipping fees, dealer fee, etc).

January 6, 2003, 06:18 PM
i went to pick up my Mauser at lunch today from the pawn shop/ffl, and decided to take a look at their shotguns and pistols. i could see a few decent shotguns, like a mossberg persuader and winchester 1300. but they wanted retail prices for VERY used hardware. the persuader didnt have a front sight, the heat shield was scuffed up, and they didnt have the pistol grip to go with it. $285 was their price tag. I can go to walmart and buy it brand new for just a few dollars more.
their winchester 1300 is the one that has 'alaska' and a picture screenprinted on the side of the stock, and walmart has that for $300, without the screen printing, $270. the pawn shop is asking $350 for the one with the screen printing on it.
looked at some of their colts and springfields, and decided to put them down when i discovered gooey substances oozing from betwen the frame/slide.

oh, and the guy at the counter, he said "Anything bigger than a .40 will persuade my attention."
i asked "so, a 9mm doesnt get much response from you?"
"nope. too many people walk away after getting shot with a 9mm. the boys in Vietnam found that out quickly."

they had a glock .40, first generation, i mentioned something about how i didnt realize just how big the frame is on it, he says "yeah it has to be, to accomodate that large .40 caliber bullet."
in my mind i go "hmmmmmmmm"
then he goes to show it to me, and says "prison guards love this glock. cops too." he pulled out the HK in .40; once again, "hmmmmm"....

btw, the Mauser, from CDNN, very nice! a few scrapes and dings on the stock, but the wood has a nice feel, and is in far greater condition than anything i've seen locally.

Average Guy
January 7, 2003, 01:19 AM
I've done the "uhh, I need help putting it back together again" routine (Ruger MkII).

What I did was take it to the local gunsmithery and have them reassemble it for me (I was afraid if I kept messing with it, I'd throw it across the garage). So what did I get for my $35? Some rather condescending advice that I didn't need to take the gun apart so much to clean it. Thanks, pal--won't be seeing you again.

Hey, I can field-strip and reassemble an M16A2 blindfolded, suckah! :neener:

January 7, 2003, 01:41 AM
I'm with some of the folks in here with the "I can get it for less directly..". Visited a few gun stores with overpriced guns.

Me: Good afternoon Sirs.

Gun store owner/employee: uhh

Me: I'm looking for an FMP G3 receiver

Gun store owner/employee: uhh.. we don't the have the FMP but here (pointing to a few stacks of G3 receivers) these are made by Hesse, cost $350. This here is made by Special Weapons, they don't make 'em anymore, you can have it for $499. :eek:

Me: You know what? I can get those POS for a hundred bucks from your distributor.

January 7, 2003, 04:23 AM
Goober: "uh... do you sell the guns that shoot the bullets that kill people?"

Clerk: "No... we're not allowed to sell those to the public. Only cops can buy those..."


January 7, 2003, 04:38 AM
I actually said this one:

Dealer (as I'm finishing my yellow-sheet): "You need any ammo or anything else while you're here?"

Me (as I'm buying new handgun): "You don't sell ski-masks, do you?"

Dealer (looking pissed): "I hope you're joking"

Me: "Yeah, I'm joking. I have panty-hose in the car".

He wasn't amused. At all.:fire:

January 7, 2003, 10:38 AM
"So what do you think about (enter gun model here)?"

January 10, 2003, 12:32 AM
Anybody else? I'm positive some of you have a story or two. :D

I for one have a great deal of respect to most FFL dealers out there, most of them are honest and good folks but there are a few who are out to rip off gun owners, one of the reasons, why I took the time and hassle to setup an extra office space within one of our network operations center for our current 01 FFL and soon to be class 2, SOT.

For C&R types, I use my type 03 FFL. Save me a bunch and I don't have to deal with some dealers out there who are nothing but a bunch of "scammers". Like I said, most of 'em are fair but there are quite a few that shouldn't be in the business, ripping of hard working folks like you and me.

If you enjoyed reading about "Dumb things to tell a gun dealer" here in TheHighRoad.org archive, you'll LOVE our community. Come join TheHighRoad.org today for the full version!