Doom. The lawyers got involved in our war.


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Quartus
March 12, 2003, 06:32 PM
Sent to my by a friend, but I don't know where it came from. Hmmm. Somewhere that doesn't teach spelling, I guess. (It's 'heel'.)

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America's Achilles Heal
Jim Bramlett
Mar 11, 2003

Dear friends:

I have been optimistic about America's ability to quickly disarm Saddam and put him on the retirement rolls until I read this shocking
article in USAToday headlined:

"U.S. ATTORNEYS DISPATCHED TO ADVISE MILITARY"

The article is at http://www.usatoday.com/usatonline/20030311/4934032s.htm

That's it. It's all over, folks. With lawyers advising them, our powerful military doesn't have a fighting chance. Too bad.

Some see the Iraq war as judgment on America. It's ironic but not surprising that the judgment would come via our own legal profession,
which has already ruined our judicial system and health care system. Now it threatens to ruin our national defense.

Can't you see American commanders in the heat of battle asking for legal counsel before they blast on-coming (or retreating) Iraqi tanks?
They might ask, "Am I being nice enough?"

Can't you just see an army of American lawyers out there reading Miranda rights to tens of thousands of desperate Iraqi soldiers as they
throw up their hands to surrender (French-style).

Can't you just see Johnnie Cochran frantically trying to put gloves on Iraqi prisoners, gleefully shouting, "If the glove doesn't fit, you must
acquit!"

Can't you just see the tons of business cards being passed out to Iraqis so they can sue the U.S. and have representation?

Okay, so I may be slightly exaggerating. But I am concerned that our litigious society is now sending lawyers to advise our military
commanders. This is too much.

But it is probably a good thing because America's humaneness in this war will probably be reviewed and judged closely by the United
Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights, whose members set such a high example of humans rights, and include such countries as
China, Cuba, Sudan, Syria, Uganda and Vietnam (see http://193.194.138.190/html/menu2/2/chrmem.htm). (Doesn't Syria chair this
exalted, very moral committee?)

You know -- the United Nations is that organization and standard of morality, according to the Pope, that for decades has ignored blatant
human rights violations by the former Soviet Union, China, Cuba, Muslim nations, Cambodia, Rwanda, et al., as many millions have been
slaughtered Now they are trying to protect one of the greatest murderers of all -- Saddam Hussein. The sad part is that, so far, we are
letting them.

Jim :)

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Peetmoss
March 12, 2003, 07:03 PM
Wouldn't those Attorneys be working for the US Gov? Trying to make sure that we don't voilate the rules of egagment? However I do see your point. I believe if it was good enough for our now "friends" it's good enough for the Iraqi's. Carpet bomb the whole country.

Standing Wolf
March 12, 2003, 09:27 PM
Maybe we could drop lawyers on Iraq.

joebogey
March 12, 2003, 09:32 PM
Standing Wolf,


That my friend would be cruel and unusual punishment. :evil:

Quartus
March 12, 2003, 09:49 PM
To the Iraquis or the lawyers? :confused:


Oh. Duh. The Iraquis.



:D

Waitone
March 13, 2003, 09:49 AM
The problem ain't the lawyers (can't believe I just said it).

The problem is the existence of world courts claiming jurisdiction on America and Americans. It is made worse by people and organizations in the US who agree.

foghornl
March 13, 2003, 10:33 AM
Hmmmm

Could we use the lawyers as human shields for OUR front-line troops? ? ? ? ?

Just a thought :evil:

DeltaElite
March 13, 2003, 10:39 AM
Lawyers, the reason I believe in abortion. :evil:

seeker_two
March 13, 2003, 10:42 AM
Could we use the lawyers as human shields for OUR front-line troops? ? ? ? ?

Naah. They'd be much more useful as Iraqui human shields. We'll even give them the laser-target-designator system so that they can "earn their pay"...:evil:

Leatherneck
March 13, 2003, 11:30 AM
There probably is good reason to have lawyers available to high commanders in theater, given that potential participants are: of many and sundry religions, some of which encroach on secular governance; citizens of one nation, born in another, resident in a third; wanted in various countries for various offenses; likely to be captured or killed by one or more of several countries; in the case of the U.S. participants, a mixture of civilian and military operating under an extra-constitutional order from the C-in-C. I can imagine a lot of unusual situations arising.

Me, I lean more toward the kill 'em all etc. school. ;)

TC
TFL Survivor

waterdog
March 13, 2003, 12:48 PM
Whos dumb*** idea was that?

Freakin bureacrats!

waterdog

Waitone
March 13, 2003, 01:43 PM
Is the term "fragging" still in the military lexicon?

Henry Bowman
March 13, 2003, 02:38 PM
As a lawyer myself (who is as pro-gun, pro2A as anyone on this site!), I must point out that it is only 99.99999999999999% of lawyers who give the rest of us a bad name! :evil:

spartacus2002
March 13, 2003, 07:29 PM
As a lawyer myself (who is as pro-gun, pro2A as anyone on this site!),



That sounds like a challenge: I'm the most pro-gun pro2A lawyer on this board, and I'll fight you for that honor!

But if I lose, Henry, PLEASE don't feed me to the hogs!:D

benewton
March 13, 2003, 09:00 PM
Dropping lawyers would be an environmental crime!

Even burning oil wells are cleaner.

Also, the sharks who live there have to make a living too.

ahadams
March 13, 2003, 10:45 PM
hey look guys, seeing as my brother is a lawyer (and a JAG officer who is back on AD again) I can say with some degree of certainty that lawyers know more lawyer jokes than the rest of us even know exist. THEREFORE I HEREBY PETITION the THR lawyers to do their THR duty and publish an only-loosely-related-to-RKBA thread of lawyer jokes to which the rest of us may refer from now on. By numbering them we can save tremendous time by simply refering to the appropriate joke number in response to dumb legal situations.

Spartacus, Henry, whaddaya say?

spartacus2002
March 13, 2003, 10:59 PM
THere are no lawyer jokes; they are all true stories!!!:cuss:

Matt249SAW
March 13, 2003, 11:10 PM
here's an idea... lets send all of our attorneys to Iraq. (except the two here) once there they would begin sueing... I can see it now... a complete Iraqi governmental shutdown.. We have had decades to get used to this problem.. Imagine if it was unleashed on some helpless country like Iraq...

Talk about weapons of mass destruction....

:D

ahadams
March 13, 2003, 11:12 PM
doggone Spartacus, and here I thought you were going to say "there are no lawyer jokes here - they're all in DC"!:D

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