What Gun for LLAMAS!


PDA






Cosmoline
November 26, 2005, 12:00 AM
And please, don't tell me "a llama" :D

http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/05326/610474.stm

The first hint Dale Airsman got that his morning's chores might end badly was the unusual growl from Charlie, a 4-year old llama.

The noise graduated to a high-pitched squeal, whereupon Charlie spit, flattened his ears back and bared his teeth, including the three sets of razor-sharp "fighting teeth," which llamas use to rip the scrotum from male competitors in the wild.
----

Jesh! I've run into small groups of llamas up here over the years--there's one or two outfits that use them to pack for tourists. I had no idea my nethers were in danger! Though in truth I've never trusted them. Too foreign and shifty-eyed.

I never trusted the llamas very much either.

If you enjoyed reading about "What Gun for LLAMAS!" here in TheHighRoad.org archive, you'll LOVE our community. Come join TheHighRoad.org today for the full version!
MICHAEL T
November 26, 2005, 12:04 AM
Thats what Llamas were designed for Llama protection :neener: . It your..........:what:

Rupestris
November 26, 2005, 12:10 AM
Well, I had planed to move to Montana and become a Llama farmer.
I guess I'll raise me a crop of dental floss instead.:p

I've heard of sheep farmers useing llamas to defend the heard from wolves and coyotes. They're pretty good at stomping the beans out of a predator.

Like any animal, they are to be concidered unpredictable at best. Bears, dogs, deer, koalas, llamsa, etc... Expect the unexpected.

Preacherman
November 26, 2005, 12:14 AM
"If you're too huggy-kissy with them, a male who has not been castrated can turn on you."

Somehow, even in my wildest fantasies, I have never been tempted to get "huggy-kissy" with any male animal, of any genus, species or breed... :what:

Cosmoline
November 26, 2005, 01:46 AM
Awww shucks
http://www.thehighroad.org/attachment.php?attachmentid=31813&d=1132987597

jsalcedo
November 26, 2005, 02:31 AM
40mm grenade launcher.

Anything else would be unsporting.

Good thing charlie didn't try to do the scrotum ripping thing.

Wiley
November 26, 2005, 06:58 AM
As the great 20th Century philosopher Ogden Nash wrote:

"The one L Lama, he's a priest.

The two L Llama, he's a beast.

Bet you've never seen a three L Lllama."

Dave Markowitz
November 26, 2005, 10:25 AM
The llama is a quadruped which lives in the big rivers like the Amazon. It has two ears, a heart, a forehead, and a beak for eating honey. But it is provided with fins for swimming.

Llamas are larger than frogs.

Llamas are dangerous, so if you see one where people are swimming, you shout...

Look out, there are llamas!

:neener:

Don Gwinn
November 26, 2005, 11:13 AM
. . . . and they can complete a film on time and under budget, even if all the previous staff have had to be sacked.



including the three sets of razor-sharp "fighting teeth," which llamas use to rip the scrotum from male competitors in the wild.
I have no words.

Biker
November 26, 2005, 11:17 AM
I've always wondered why most of the llama ranchers I've known had high-pitched voices.:uhoh:
Biker

El Tejon
November 26, 2005, 11:41 AM
I would use whatever they used in Napoleon Dynamite.:D

ALASKACAJUN
November 26, 2005, 11:56 AM
Sounds like a job for the "Holy Hand Grenade!"

- Clint :D

Capt Charlie
November 26, 2005, 02:05 PM
It ain't the teeth I worry about. The male's fighting teeth can easily be cut out just using string as a saw. In fact, I don't know anyone with llamas that leaves them intact. It's the spit I don't like. When that head points to the sky, ears go flat back, and you hear that gurgling in their throat, watch out! They can spit clear stuff, not too bad, or they can reach way down deep and pull up the most disgusting, vile, nasty stuff you can imagine and plant it dead center bullseye (in your face) from 7 feet away! We have five of them on the ranch where I help wrangle horses and guide trail, and we haven't lost a lamb to coyotes since we got them. Llamas are smart, really smart. They learn to do things after only 2 or 3 times. They are also usually laid back and gentle, but they do have a strict pecking order, and owners have to stay at the top of the order. Otherwise you get what happened there. I can't picture getting "kissy feely" :rolleyes: with them, but some folks try to treat them too much like a pet, and with llamas, familiarity really does breed contempt. They're extremely independant critters with a personality somewhat like a cat. They are outstanding pack animals for backpacking and small children can ride them. The fun thing is how they greet each other (and you). They rush up and plant their nose right up against yours. Always good for a few laughs when you introduce someone new to them and they don't know what's coming :what: :evil: :D .

Jamie C.
November 26, 2005, 03:00 PM
Hmmm.....

I used to have a sister-in-law that, rumor has it, got into a sorority or some other "group", while in college, by castrating a lamb with her teeth.... :eek:

She never confirmed or denied this, and would only smile when asked about it.... Which I always found more than a little scary. :uhoh:


J.C.

The_Antibubba
November 26, 2005, 07:44 PM
That llama spit sounds even better than pepper spray!

Does anyone know if you can carry a llama in NYC? :D




"Old llama herders never die-the just get sacced"

Sheldon J
November 26, 2005, 08:03 PM
The daughter was given a baby Alpacka mostly dead 2 days old and the mom had abandoned it. She now has a 6 month old very valuable animal. One problem she has been dealing with is something called "Crazy Llama Syndrome". Basically it boils down to you bottle feed them they think of you as part of the flock, so when they mature they want to fight. How do you fix this, well... you fix them..:evil:

Gunpacker
November 26, 2005, 08:54 PM
Saw a film clip on one of the "funniest" shows. In the clip, a reporter went into a fenced area with Llamas. One of them came up to the reporter who wasn't afraid, proptly kinda grabbed him between his front legs, and pushed him forward for 20 yards or so into a sewage trench. Llama stopped short. I am not sure, but the Llama appeared to be laughing.:evil:

Capt Charlie
November 26, 2005, 10:32 PM
I saw that clip! I'll bet that if that reporter knew what that (male) llama REALLY had in mind, he never would've let that clip go beyond the cutting room floor! :what: :D :D

stratus
November 26, 2005, 10:55 PM
You people must have all been drunk at the time of posting. I read some of these posts and... oh my hairy lord.

I did not know llamas have beaks and fins. I just think of Napoleon Dynamite. "eat the FOOD!"

Shorts
November 26, 2005, 10:57 PM
I think the protection you're looking for is called a "cup"

heisler
November 26, 2005, 11:58 PM
http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/llama.php

Justin
November 27, 2005, 12:12 AM
http://www.ilovealpacas.com/

Preacherman
November 27, 2005, 12:21 AM
Hmmm... So, if I have a Safepacker (http://thewilderness.com/catalog/product_info.php/products_id/18) specially made out of llama hair, does that make it an Al-Packer?

:neener:

Justin
November 27, 2005, 12:33 AM
AAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!

:)

nfl1990
November 27, 2005, 12:48 AM
Well since noone has said it yet, I'll say it, a FA .50bmg

loose cannon
November 27, 2005, 01:11 AM
and god kills another kitten.oh the humanity!

weapon for llamas? how bout the righteous rpg?

Andrew Rothman
November 27, 2005, 02:55 AM
As the great 20th Century philosopher Ogden Nash wrote:

"The one L Lama, he's a priest.

The two L Llama, he's a beast.

Bet you've never seen a three L Lllama."

Actually, it goes like this:

The one-l lama,
He's a priest.
The two-l llama,
He's a beast.
And I will bet
A silk pajama
There isn't any
Three-l lllama.*

*The author's attention has been called to a type of conflagration known as a three-alarmer. Pooh.

And yes, the footnote is Nash's.

Wiley
November 27, 2005, 06:39 AM
Thanks, Andrew!

I knew my third line didn't sound right.

rwc
November 27, 2005, 02:48 PM
I had planed to move to Montana and become a Llama farmer.

Be careful - I have it on good authority that a couple years ago a gentleman showed up at a game check station in central Montana with a llama in the back of his pick up. He thought it was just a really ugly deer...

spooney
November 27, 2005, 05:48 PM
Be careful - I have it on good authority that a couple years ago a gentleman showed up at a game check station in central Montana with a llama in the back of his pick up. He thought it was just a really ugly deer...

I was living in Montana at the time. This is a true story, the worst part is it wasn't even an out of stater. To this very day I still get weird looks from people when I see a Llama and remark about what a nice looking whitetail that is.

Capt Charlie
November 27, 2005, 06:08 PM
I had planed to move to Montana and become a Llama farmer.
Careful on this too. A little over 10 years ago, a grade female llama went at auction for an average $5000., (males cheaper), and a show champion could bring as much as $25,000. Today, you can commonly get them at auction for around a hundred bucks. That's the problem with "pet crazes"; it dies down quickly and you can loose your shirt. Now alpacas are the rage, going for unbelievable amounts, but I'm betting the same thing will happen there too. Invest in something proven and solid, like cattle or horses.

np15cgg
November 27, 2005, 06:31 PM
for llama ranchers. The same research geneticists that cloned the sheep Dolly have now been able to clone llamas. The first success was, of course, the Dolly llama.

Firethorn
November 27, 2005, 06:39 PM
I was living in Montana at the time. This is a true story, the worst part is it wasn't even an out of stater. To this very day I still get weird looks from people when I see a Llama and remark about what a nice looking whitetail that is.

In nebraska one year the game warden caught a guy gutting a thouroghbred. With his deer tag already attached to the ear...

Though in that case, from my possibly flawed rememberance, it was a lawyer from chicago who was doing that.

rwc
November 27, 2005, 11:37 PM
Now alpacas are the rage

Last year my wife and I spent a few weeks in Peru. We ate a lot of Alpaca. Good eats.:D

If you enjoyed reading about "What Gun for LLAMAS!" here in TheHighRoad.org archive, you'll LOVE our community. Come join TheHighRoad.org today for the full version!