When No Means No...In the Shooting Sense


April 26, 2006, 01:39 PM
Hello Everyone,

I would imagine that the majority of people on The High Road are careful not to discuss their shooting hobby very much in their respective work environments due to lightweight Yuppies and their PC breatheren. Recently I accepted a position with a small company in which several members of management enjoy shooting. Initially I thought this would be a blessing and deviated from my long standing rules of mixing business with pleasure...little did I know!

The bad part is that these individuals are not truly shooters in the sense that this is their primary or only hobby. They don't sit down with Elmer Keith's books and read them over and over again, research new calibers, etc. They are golfers who like to go shooting sometimes. I went shooting with one of them ONCE and now the guy is all over me like a cheap suit.

Anyway, following our one shooting trip he started pestering me literally everyday about going shooting again. He has proven to be a rather rude individual as you get to know him who talks about others behind their back in very ugly ways. In fact, I know he has discussed a couple of my firearms projects with other people without my permission. He's also one of those individuals who isn't very bright, but fancies himself clever and intelligent. Further, he tries to lecture me about shooting and equipment when he's been doing it a few months compared to my 24 years of enjoying the sport. Then when he needs help he asks my advice. Combine this with a massive inferiority complex and you have this guy.

The first time I mentioned being interested in long range rifle shooting, he immediately suggests we buy the same kind of rifles, learn together, and go shooting every weekend. Yes, the first time! Further, if you put him off about going to the range he starts suggesting ways you could go or equipment you could use. He's like a leach or someone of the opposite sex who won't take "no" for an answer! We're talking "no life" in a big way when it comes to this guy while I have a very full one that I eek out time every couple of weeks for a big trip to the range...and I don't want to spend it with him! I've got a regular group of shooting buddies and a very talented disabled student I have been teaching for sometime.

Ignoring him and the subject didn't work so I finally told him that I was not single and living in an apartment like him so I did not have as much free time. Further, when I did get time it was very last minute. So I would not be planning any future shooting trips with him. He alluded to the coming day light savings time shift, but I did not take the bait or give him any hope. I've simply kept our discussions to business unless he asks for shooting advice and that's it. I've reversed some of the things I have said about my shooting projects or interests just to snub any stories he has spread about me and my hobby. I'm a very private individual by nature and have gotten used to other shooters being the same way.

The worst part is the guy now shoots where I shoot on a regular basis as he lives near the range. If he were to come over and try to "train" my disabled student like so many men I have chased off (she is rather attractive) all hell would break loose. This guy is friends with individuals in the executive suite of our company and I do not wish to be mean to him, but he's working on it pretty hard here.

The other day he says to me, "You know, for someone who is really into shooting you don't go very much." I replied that there was more to shooting than the act itself and left it at that.

Anyone ever have a similar situation or humorous story along these lines?

How did you handle it?

Currently I am auditioning other ranges to start frequenting just to get away from this guy and hope to find one soon.

In closing, I would like to say that although I was never one of them I feel for all of the ladies who had the deadbeat guys who would never stop calling you and bothering you to go out with them.

Now I know what that feels like!

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Mongo the Mutterer
April 26, 2006, 02:14 PM
How did you handle it?I'll tell you how I would. Very carefully.

You are the newbie, he is the old hand at the company. Also you said he has low self esteem. My first advice is watch your six!

Then, although I wouldn't go shooting with him, I would provide him with shooting stuff (magazines, etc.) and discuss firearms with him. It seems your goal is to away from range trips with him. If you discuss opinions, and respect his (when you can), you will be better off.

You already said he is a backstabber, so don't turn your back to him. Hold your enemies close.


April 26, 2006, 02:38 PM
Anthony said: The other day he says to me, "You know, for someone who is really into shooting you don't go very much."

Reply with, "You're right, I don't. These guys here at work keep me so busy, and with spring coming I need to spend time doing projects and family activities. Sorry. Why don't you go on out there and have fun. You don't need me to come along to have a good time, do you?"

Keep turning him down, avoid extracurricular discussions, and make yourself into a very boring person to spend time with. He'll give up.

And you've learned not to make that mistake again. I passed up many opportunities to develop this kinship at work. Many . . .

I can make a choice of being discreet and not getting hassled, or let everyone at work know (because once the gossip hound finds out, everyone knows) and then have to make choices about carrying and the negative light it puts me in among those who despise my interest.

I bet if this guy's a jerk, and everyone knows he's a jerk. Act like a gentlemen around everyone else, and politely downplay and dismiss with an incredulous look the subject when anyone brings to you what he's said around the office. You can do damage control, an eventually folks will forget. But you have to make an effort now to dissassociate yourself with him, and appear to concur with everyone else's opinion the guy is over the top, you just didn't know it until you spent an afternoon with him.

I bet he isn't 30 yet, not even 25? Eventually he'll move on to another company. Just don't encourage him. At all.

April 26, 2006, 02:42 PM
Would you believe more like 50 years old?

High Planes Drifter
April 26, 2006, 03:04 PM
Well, if you keep avoiding him and make it a point not to at least be sociable with him in the office, he WILL begin to resent you and start unwanted rumors about you. I'd handle this with "silk gloves". Socialize with him at work a bit, but make it a point to bring up how you have a home project going on, or how you have big plans for the weekend with your wife + kids. Bring this up first so he wont ask you to go to the range or anywhere else. What Im getting at is - if you feel he has stroke with upper management - then dont just give him the cold shoulder; dont just completely shut him out. So he's an a$$h*le, its not going to kill you to be friendly to him.

Or if you have the cahunas' and are confident enough in your sexuality, you could grab his butt and smile seductively at him when he turns around. That'll get him off your back.;)

April 26, 2006, 03:09 PM
Highplains Drifter: LMAO!!! I'm afraid I am knuckle dragger deluxe...I could never do anything of the kind.

Actually I recently came into a mountain of work so I have a good excuse to be remote for awhile and this is common knowledge.

I do associate with him and agree with your "silk gloves" point.

He's not so much of an @sshole as he is just pathetic.

April 26, 2006, 03:28 PM
"I would imagine that the majority of people on The High Road are careful not to discuss their shooting hobby very much in their respective work environments due to lightweight Yuppies and their PC breatheren."

I have pictures of myself hunting and shooting as well as myself on the company sponsored trap team on the walls of my office. Do the rest of you really hide the fact that you shoot?

April 26, 2006, 03:28 PM
Employ bullseye shooting competitions at $5.00 a round. i.e. he shoots 4 bulls and you shoot 6, he pays you $10.00.

He'll go away when he's broke and you'll have more money to buy guns.

April 26, 2006, 03:43 PM
"Do the rest of you really hide the fact that you shoot?"

I've got my favorite target -- the one day when I shot like I knew how -- hanging on the wall by my desk next to a list of phone numbers, a Thomas Jefferson quote, an AzCDL sticker, and various to-do lists.

April 26, 2006, 04:46 PM
I don't hide the fact that I shoot. I have gun rag's on my side table, a collection of bullets I picked up from the range, and a NRA calander hanging up.
Actually, there's at least seven people on my floor besides myself that have a CCW permit, not to mention all of the hunters, IPSC shooters, etc, that work here. I once dropped a dummy .45 acp round in my bosses office and a vendor found it. She knew exactly where it came from. :evil:

April 26, 2006, 05:23 PM
it seems like a good idea to acknowedge your shared hobby in a nontimeconsuming, noncommital way.

One way would be to give him a book on the technicals of shooting you enjoyed. Be aware that you may never get the book back, but really, $20 is a small price to pay for getting him off your back for a while, but not having him turn on you (chalk it up to a stupidity tax for getting in there in the first place)

mention in passing 'a guy I know mentioned getting gun XYZ the other day' something that can get him exited, but give you the easy out of 'i don't know why he wants it' or 'youd have to ask him, I won't see him again for another 3 weeks' etc. Again, you are allowing him to spend lots of mental time 'with' you while you are actually free to do your own thing

Standing Wolf
April 26, 2006, 06:08 PM
I've never been ashamed about the fact that I exercise my Second Amendment civil rights.

Sad to say, the world includes altogether too many dependent, pestiferous people who have no idea how boring they are. Television was invented for them, but many of them seem not to know how to make good use of it.

April 26, 2006, 06:20 PM
I think you've blended a couple of words: Or if you have the cahunas' and are confident enough in your sexuality

Kahuna is the Hawaiian word for priest, teacher, expert, or advisor.

Cojones is the slang Spanish word for testicles.

Of course you could have been referring to a Hawaiian priest well endowed in the testicular region.


30-06 lover
April 26, 2006, 06:25 PM
I had a buddy (for about 6 months) that I thought was a cool dude, but the more I went hunting and shooting with him, the more he opened up to me. He started expressing sexual fantasies that has about his mom and juvenile sister.:what: Well after he dropped that one on me, I have had little contact with him. I still see him around where I used to work, and when I see him, he begs me to go shooting with him or take him hunting. I just say that I can't because I don't have the money, time, transportation, etc. He getting the hint and now doesn't ask me to take him, but he will call and invite me to go with him. I politely decline and thank him for the offer. It sucks knowing what I know, and not have aything I can do about it becuase he has not done anything to his mom or sister...yet.:barf:

April 26, 2006, 06:57 PM
Migoi, Migoi, Migoi . . . what am I going to do with you??? :eek:

:evil: :D :neener:

April 26, 2006, 07:34 PM
I have the answer:

Point him to www.thehighroad.org

It will consume so much of his time, he wont bother you anymore.

April 26, 2006, 07:57 PM
most of the people at my work know I shoot, own guns, and any who have started the gun control stuff have gotten the gun control doesn't work speech. Now if it actually had effect or bored them so much that they don't want to endure it agian I'm not sure, but it has gotten those few people off my back. Honestly, other then a few people none have had anything bad to say about guns. And of those few none have been downright hostle twoards guns.

April 26, 2006, 08:08 PM

I think High Planes Drifter gave you some good advice - except for that last paragraph. I did laugh at that, but wouldn't consider it as a practical solution. What if he smiled back?

In any case. Yes to silk gloves. Maybe one or two more times, tell him your're going to the range, actually shoot with him. Don't cut him dead on this if he's truly the type you've made him out to be. Not to say you can't recieve a phone call 'bout an hour into the shoot & have to leave.

In other words, distance yourself, but do it nicely & slowly. Consider this a real world intelligence test.


April 26, 2006, 08:24 PM
Or if you have the cahunas' and are confident enough in your sexuality, you could grab his butt and smile seductively at him when he turns around. That'll get him off your back.Bad idea. He may also increase his attention 4-fold. How do you get out of that one?:uhoh:

April 26, 2006, 08:32 PM
Just tell the guy the truth.
He's heard it before, he needs to hear it again.
If everyone treats him with kid gloves he won't learn.
You will be doing him a big favor by taking him aside and telling him what you
told us.
Your co workers allready know he has a problem and that will lessen any negative impact.

Or you could just start telling people that while you are flattered by his constant attention, and you have no predjudice against homosexuals you wish he would stop asking you out because your hetro....I did that once in a similar situation and it worked like a charm.

April 26, 2006, 08:42 PM
I don't make it a secret about owning and shooting guns, but I am very reluctant to get into details about what I own and how many guns I own. Just goes against the grain.

April 26, 2006, 09:16 PM
I used to have that problem when people would find out that I like to bass fish. "Well, when are we going fishing?" My usual reply was "I prefer to fish by myself. I can go when I want to, stay as long as I want to, come home when I want to. I couldn't tell you "I'm going tomorrow, because to tell you the truth I don't know if I am or not. I won't know until tomorrow."

I had one guy who kept telling me, "That doesn't matter. Just call me anytime. I called him one morning at 0530 when I knew he had worked the 3pm-11pm shift. "Hey, You ready to go to the river?"...... Huh? You mean NOW? Ok. I gotta take a shower, and get something to eat....Ok. The boat is leaving the ramp in 30 mins. Be there if you want to go.

Never heard anymore noise from him about going with me.

evan price
April 27, 2006, 01:07 AM
You could try going the other way entirely. Start bugging the guy about going shooting more often. Only take one gun like a .22 or something. Then start long boring conversations involving the relative merits of the .41 Action Express Versus the modern .40 S&W cartridge and go in to great detail ballistically. Bore the guy to tears.

I had a fella liked to do the same stuff that I did, I would let him make "appointments" like, next Saturday at 7am, then I just would turn off phone ringer and leave cell phone in truck and sleep in. Next week at work Iwould get the "Hey man where were you?" thing, I would just say I overslept. Do this often enough they ge the message.

evan price
April 27, 2006, 01:41 AM
If all else fails, tell him he isn't professional enough.....:evil:

April 27, 2006, 01:42 AM
Just put him in the car and drop him off in the country...

another okie
April 27, 2006, 08:06 AM
Give him information about some shooting leagues - bullseye, IPSC, IDPA, three gun, SASS, etc. That way he can shoot without you.

April 27, 2006, 11:22 AM
Oh God! LMAO!!! Your ideas are great Evan and Cajun...that's very much my style. Turning the phone off and sleeping in is so me on Saturday. If this guy wasn't "connected" I'd do it in a heartbeat.

Trust me, Evan. I've thought about telling him he's not professional enough about a billion times.

For example, can you guess what kind of ammunition he carries in the guns he keeps for self defense (i.e., SIG)?

Try "Tungsten-Nytrilium Fragmentable Explosive Entry Fang Face Round (FFR) - Jacketed Hollow Points" from Extreme Shock ammunition, and trust me he likes to use the whole name sometimes and other times just "Fang Face" with this blank glazed stare in his eyes that just show his stupidity even more.

Yep, it's those Mall Ninjas from the magazine ad jumping through the pyrotechnic explosions! He likes to point out his rounds over and over and over again. He was really impressed with the attached photo showing what the round does in what appear to be Duct-Seal which has been known for years to give inflated reuslts from a wound ballistics perspective. He's fired maybe 10 rounds of this stuff through his guns to see if it is reliable. Can you say L-O-S-E-R?!?!

Then he shoots nasty reloads and other low quality ammo through his SIG and wonders why it isn't 100% reliable!

I've already given him the information on the local IDPA and other leagues so he can go shoot more on his own. So far it seems to be working, but not fast enough for my taste.

April 27, 2006, 12:21 PM
I wouldn't be suprised if this guy knows how to use a computer, and given his intrest in guns he may just join some gun forums, he may already be a member you never know.

April 27, 2006, 12:28 PM
If he is I certainly did not tell him and am not worried about it.

Neither this thread nor my profile have enough information for him or anyone else to identify me.

I'm being careful.

April 27, 2006, 01:18 PM
The "Insured By HK" bumper sticker on my car kinda gave me away, but then again where I work is pretty open anyways. The last place I was at was really anti-gun, so I kept my mouth shut for the most part. I still play it safe & don't talk about what I have or how many, only because I don't want to be harassed into having to show 'em off. The local gun shop knows, but that's because they sold 'em to me-and they like me a lot!

April 27, 2006, 10:30 PM
I contracted for about 6 m onths to a place which wasn't anti...just so long as you didn't make a big deal out of it. The one rule was to not mention guns or shooting on the floor where the assembly went on. The ladies on the assembly floor figured me out the first time I took FirstInLine's car in and they saw her bumper sticker.

"A Lady with a GUN
Has more FUN"



April 27, 2006, 11:41 PM
"Just put him in the car and drop him off in the country..."

Me: "Hey, he's not a stray cat!"
Did I say that out loud?


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