Best lines used at the range??


October 8, 2006, 02:55 AM
:D :scrutiny: I was at the range tonight talking w/ one of the other members and got to wondering...what are some good lines you've heard at the range??? :scrutiny: :D
Now, I am not going to count "is that a gun or are you just happy to see me?" :rolleyes: Tough to use anyway if it's a guy talking to a girl ;)

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October 8, 2006, 03:19 AM
it wasn't a range, but a gun shop (which could be a whole separate thread). now i was looking at some revolvers, and this kid, who was definitely not 18, asked for something i have never heard of in my life..."yeah i need a grip for my smith and wesson glock." as the owner and i looked at him oddly, he said, "yeah, for a colt glock i mean."....well glock was used twice so we kinda guessed thats what he wanted, something for a glock. gotta love it... i actually laughed out loud once he left.

October 8, 2006, 03:23 AM
Glock is becoming the new nickname for gun. I hate that. I took a buddy to the range a while back and we were firing my old Kimber. He asked me if it was a Glock? I asked him to leave.:D

October 8, 2006, 04:01 AM
when the old man a few benches down says " i normally keep em in the x- ring, but the sun is my eyes" and it is mid day the sun is high in the sky, and he is under a covered firing line. his groups looked like a shotgun pattern!:D

October 8, 2006, 11:47 AM
"Nice sniper rifle," said of a CZ .22 rifle with a centerfire scope.

October 8, 2006, 12:18 PM
if you can hit a paper plate at 100yrds you can kill a deer

October 8, 2006, 12:26 PM

I have had people say the same of my 10/22.

October 8, 2006, 12:27 PM
Any tool-blaming

"I'm not used to this kind of ammo"

"I'm used to a scope, not sights"

"It must be a sticky trigger"

"Must not be clean"

October 8, 2006, 12:48 PM
"why doesn't this crappy mag fit?"

me, after trying to put a s&w 908 mag in to my 1911.:D

October 8, 2006, 01:01 PM
"I hate Glocks" my friend Johnny said after removing the center 3/4" of his target at 7 yards with 15 rounds from my G19. "I hate you", I replied.

October 8, 2006, 01:12 PM
My friend Tony, and I were shooting my SW99, and this old guy comes up to the line with a revolver. My friend, was really new to shooting, and had only shot autos. I asked the guy if my friend could shoot it. He says "Sure, its a .357". So Tony shoots it, and is really impressed. After the old guy leaves, Tony says "Whoa, a .357! That had some kick to it. Can you imagine what the magnum one feels like?" It took a while before I could calm down enough to explain it to him.
We still laugh about that one.


October 8, 2006, 01:17 PM
Wal-Mart had HUGE cans of beans on clearance. My shooting buddy and I picked up a few. We took them to the range. I liked up my AK on one and popped it, beans flew about 10 feet in the air and the can bounced about 5, I didn't one side of the can was in spanish till my partner looked over and said "holly frijoles!"

I laughed so hard I had to clear the AK and step away from the line.

October 8, 2006, 01:17 PM
Once I went to a fairground with my girlfriend (as she was at the time) and she urged me to go do the airgun stall where you knocked down little metal plates to win prizes. "Nuh uh," I said, "Those things are always rigged so you can't hit a thing."

"Go on," she says "just for fun." I agreed and paid my 20p or whatever it was. The target was perhaps 4ft from the muzzel. The target consisted of a metal box, a bit like a picture frame, and inside was a row of 5 metal plates, hinged so that they fell when hit. I took aim on the leftern most plate and fired. The plate on the far right fell over. The lady working the stall gawped at me and said "How did you do that?"

"I curled it," I said.

The Cavalry
October 8, 2006, 01:33 PM
Overheard at a range:

"I learned to shoot this good when I was a Ranger in the Air Force."


October 8, 2006, 02:19 PM
My friend and I were at a range shooting a wide variety of rifles. A man and his son came in while my friend was shooting his WASR-10 and the son started to set down his .22 rifle at the table to his left. The father said "no, dont sit next to him, he's got an Uzi" :confused:

October 8, 2006, 03:07 PM
Taking my BAR to a public range is always good for some kind of comment.

Most start with "You're not supposed to have one of those" or "We don't allow .50 Cal here" (Even though it's just "lowly" '06).

October 8, 2006, 03:17 PM
Why would anyone think a BAR is a .50 cal? :confused:

October 8, 2006, 07:38 PM
Why would anyone think a BAR is a .50 cal?

I guess 'cause it's long? You'd have to ask the old fart that made me leave the range :evil:
Several other High Roaders were with me and witnessed the hilarity....

Standing Wolf
October 8, 2006, 09:42 PM
!@#$%^&! ammo, anyway!

October 9, 2006, 01:20 AM
I always get some interesting looks when I bring the (admittedly semi-auto) Browning M1919 belt-fed to the range.

It's fun to hear folks behind the line taking about it ("Yeah, that's one of those .50 caliber machineguns! They're not legal in California anymore!" - when I lived in California), and I always chuckle a bit.

Or "Holy sweet Jesus?! What are you shooting?!" from the Range Safety Officer when I was shooting crappy Olympic .30-06 from my Remington 700. That ammo produced a stunning concussive wave and a >4ft fireball out the front of the gun while shooting at night. Absolutely a spectacle to behold. I've not seen fireballs like that from thumpinblitzenboomin' ultramags. Of course, I don't shoot that ammo anymore...

Beetle Bailey
October 9, 2006, 01:38 AM
To the guy who accidentally covered me with the muzzle of his pistol:

"Please don't do that anymore. I'm not wearing my body armor today."

To the buddy who tried to simultaneously line up the BUIS (both front and rear) and a red dot while shooting another buddy's AR:

"The back-up sights are for back-up only!"

You'd have to ask the old fart that made me leave the range

I don't get it. Couldn't you have just shown him the ammo you were using? Or is this one of those situations where they just plain didn't want you there and were just making up stuff in order to ask you to leave?

October 9, 2006, 08:26 AM
One day when I was sighting in a scoped AR15 at the rifle range I had a strange guy comment on how great of a shooter he was though he didn't even have a firearm there with him.

Then, he offered to "turn my knobs" for me. :eek: :what: :barf:

October 9, 2006, 08:40 AM
I don't get it. Couldn't you have just shown him the ammo you were using? Or is this one of those situations where they just plain didn't want you there and were just making up stuff in order to ask you to leave?

This range is owned and operated by one of the grumpiest people on the planet. It caters to deer rifle sighters that fire 8, maybe 10 shots then go home.

When we High Roaders showed up with BARs, piles of ARs, AKs, K31s, SBR's etc the guy was already in a foul mood so who knows.

It was also the only time I've ever been asked by anyone for the paperwork on an SBR or he would "have to call somebody".

It's also the last time I will ever be at that range.

Working Man
October 9, 2006, 08:59 AM
Then, he offered to "turn my knobs" for me.

Ha-Ha!! I almost lost my gum on that one. :D

Not at the range but at a gun show with a buddy.

This was said by an old-timer while I was looking at a Ruger Redhawk .44, 7.5".
"You'll have-ta brace yourself against a tree to shoot that thing".

I just smiled as my buddy did his best not to laugh (we were both trying to
be polite). The day before we had shot about 10 rnds each out of my
.45-70 BFR. Half of them were single handed. :evil:

October 9, 2006, 09:06 AM
"That's what I get for buying that crappy Blazer ammo" after getting failures on most every shot and having "groups" that barely hit the 4'x8' backboard at 10 yrds. Then he realized he was shooing 9mm ammo in a .40 S&W!


Black Knight
October 9, 2006, 09:33 AM
Yeah tell me about the Glock thing. Yesterday I was open carrying a six inch Colt Python and was asked by a 17 year old kid if it was a Glock. When did Glock start making revolvers or did I miss something?? Just kidding. Seems that the kids watch too much TV and that seems to be the prevailing pistol on TV now a days.

October 9, 2006, 10:36 AM
I remember an article on the BBC talking about the 'problem with replica guns' ("Oh no, I might get scared to death!"). They talked about how easy it was to get your hands on these 'replica weapons'. "For instance, one website we found was selling a Glock revolver gun for just 20" :banghead:

October 9, 2006, 10:41 AM
"My 1911 keeps jamming. And the rounds don't extract."

First of all I told the customer the "casings" are not extracting and you're using 40 S&W in a 45 ACP. This might be part of the problem...:D

He worked at shooting the 100 rounds of 40.

October 9, 2006, 11:02 AM
While shooting at an outdoor range, an older couple came and occupied the lane next to me. The man loaded a shotgun and handed it to his wife and was giving her some instructions. She obviously didn't handle guns much and finally got into position and squeezed the trigger. Nothing happend.

He said, "OK. Pull the trigger."

She tried again. Nothing.

"Are you pulling it?"

"Yes! I am pulling it! I think you forgot to turn it on!"

From then on I always thought about disengaging a safety as turning a gun 'on'.


October 9, 2006, 11:10 AM
if you can hit a paper plate at 100yrds you can kill a deer

Hey! I've lived with this one for years! (And, BTW, I think it's true, too!)

October 9, 2006, 01:20 PM
When did Glock start making revolvers or did I miss something?

What, you've never seen one of these?

Essex County
October 9, 2006, 01:36 PM
My favorite of all time is "This Scope is a piece of junk". " I didn't need one when I won Whimbleton when I was I was on the Navy team back in 19XX. Honest to God, I'm not lying. The rifle in question was a -Mart Marlin with an el Cheapo scope. My friend who was a lot more forgiving than I got him " lined up ". It was a couple of day's before deer season....Essex

October 9, 2006, 03:10 PM
me, my father and my uncle and cousin were at the range with a variaty, 22's. 223 and our 7mm Rem mag. down the range was a man with a pistol ( glock or some thing plastic) anyway. we took a shot with the 7mm and looked over and the guy looked liek he was waiting for the line to go cold to retrieve targets. since we had been shooting 22's and 223 for a while we had some targets out there too. so we cleared weapons looked over and asked if he wanted to get targets, after a couple "what?! HUH?!" we realized this poor guy had only brought cheap little ear plugs ( since he was only shooting pistol and its not a big range) anyway. his response to us was "no... il stay on this side of that thing!" said in jest obviously

October 9, 2006, 04:00 PM
the fella in the next booth asked me what I think is wrong with his brand new XD 45. The rounds weren't feeding. Sometimes not ejecting.

I checked the ejector, cleaned the feeding ramp, swapped magazines with him, all but gave up.

We spoke to the range officer who took one look at the hollow points the guy was shooting and said, "try the ball ammo."

No failures or anything. Smooth shooting from then on.

Sometimes it really was the ammo. :p

October 9, 2006, 05:41 PM
One of my co-workers is a big time deer hunter (took his first deer at age 8) but had never fired a handgun. I took him to the range, tacked up a paper plate, stepped back about 7 yards, and put my 642 in his hand. He fired 5 shots, and there wasn't a mark on the plate. He said, "You put blanks in it!" I told him to load it himself and try it again. He did, and again, there was not a mark on the plate. I reloaded, gave the gun to my son (who was 11 at the time) and he put all 5 onto the plate in a group about the size of my hand.

My friend was staring open mouthed when my son, with all the innocence and sincerity of youth, turned to him and calmly said, "You were doing it wrong."

Since then, anytime someone does something stupid here at work, we say "You were doing it wrong."

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