Southern Folk in the Marines...


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Ironbarr
January 11, 2003, 02:04 PM
In my mail today:

Dear Ma and Pa:

Am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marines beats working for Old Man Minch a mile. Tell them to join up quick before maybe all the places are filled.

I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 5
a.m. but am now getting so I like to sleep late.

Tell Walt and Elmer all you do before breakfast is smooth your cot and shine some things -- no hogs to slop, hay to pitch, cows to milk, mash to mix, chickens to feed, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing. Men got to shave, but it is not bad cause they git warm water.

Breakfast is strong on trimmin's like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, toast and coffee, but kind of weak on real biscuit, potatoes, ham with red eye gravy, or steak with milk gravy, fried pies and most other regular food. But tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit between two city boys that live on coffee. Their food plus yours holds you till noon, when you get fed again.

It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much. We go on "route
marches," which, the Sgt. says, are long walks to harden us up.
If he thinks so, it is not my place to tell him different. A "route march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys all get sore feet and we ride back in trucks. They ain't so smart I guess.

This country is nice, but awful flat and dry. The Sgt. is like a
schoolteacher. He nags some. The Capt. is more like the school
board. Cols. and Gens. just ride around and frown. They don't bother you none.

This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for shooting. I don't know why. The bull's-eye is near as big as a chipmunk and don't move. And it ain't shooting at you, like the Higsett boys back home. All you got to do is lie there all comfortable like and hit it. You don't even have to load your own cartridges. They come in boxes.

Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellows get onto this setup and come stampeding in.

Your loving daughter,
Betty Jean

PS. Speaking of shooting, enclosed is $2000 for barn roof and ma's teeth. The city boys shoot craps, but not very good.

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4v50 Gary
January 11, 2003, 02:26 PM
Funny and except for "your loving daughter, Billy Jean", it almost sounds like something from the Civil War.

sm
January 11, 2003, 02:31 PM
This is GREAT!! Kept getting better and better and then the best:

quote;
Your loving daughter,
Betty Jean

ROTLMAO

umm got me in the mood for scratch biscuits and red-eyed gravy.

sasnofear
January 11, 2003, 05:17 PM
hey, i thought the daugter thing, swas the only funny bit

MitchSchaft
January 11, 2003, 06:16 PM
That sounds made up to me.

4v50 Gary
January 11, 2003, 06:45 PM
I think so too, but it was one heckuva a good and funny read.


Reread the part about feuding with the Higsett. Kaint be rite since we don't have feuds no more. Drive bys n' gang shoot'ens mebbe, but no feuds.

TallPine
January 11, 2003, 10:00 PM
That sounds made up to me.

Well, duh !

Lone_Gunman
January 11, 2003, 10:02 PM
If this parody had involved a black man writing back to his homies in the ghetto, it would be considered racist.

TallPine
January 11, 2003, 11:12 PM
If this parody had involved a black man writing back to his homies in the ghetto, it would be considered racist.

Yeah, but some people are able to laugh at themselves.

George Hill
January 11, 2003, 11:33 PM
Let's not take things too seriously.
It was funny.

If your offended... lighten up.

echo3mike
January 11, 2003, 11:40 PM
Pretty accurate 'cept for the coffee....recruits don't get any in Boot. Sucked big time.


Ahhh...a day in the Marine Corps is like a day on the farm...every meal a banquet...every paycheck's a fortune...every formation a parade... I LOVE THE CORPS!!!


S.

O.K....so hindsight's a little blind...

Bob Locke
January 11, 2003, 11:55 PM
Oh my...

Art Eatman
January 11, 2003, 11:56 PM
Thinking what the U.S. was like before 1942, there were a bunch of farm and ranch kids who could relate to that letter when they went off to WW II! :)

The bit about the dice held true into the 1950s, anyway. :D A squad leader in my outfit in Korea had two pairs of those little half-size dice. One pair red; the other pair, white. He'd take all four in his hand. Shake 'em good, but you only heard one pair rattle. He'd roll out the red pair; pick 'em up; shake, and then out would come the white pair. Pretty good at dealing seconds and bottoms, too. Just a little country Mexican kid from down near Laredo...

Art

Lone_Gunman
January 12, 2003, 09:21 AM
Oh I am not offended just making an interesting point.

Telling me to "lighten up" works just fine, but would cause a street riot in other situations.

capbuster
January 12, 2003, 09:46 AM
You all know the difference between the marines and the boy scouts? The boy scouts have adult supervision.

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