Proofread please


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ambush
April 18, 2008, 12:15 PM
Letter sent - Thanks for the help.


and add/detract anything that may help. I want to send this today, thanks

Concerning Friday’s article about a child being shot in Deptford by his father, a Wenonah police officer, while cleaning his firearm.

While we would all agree it was a tragic event, let’s label it what it really was. Most folks would call this an accident, however, your knowledgeable firearm enthusiast would call this a negligent discharge. The first rule of cleaning any firearm is to clear your weapon. Considering the outcome of this event, the officer neglected to do just that. The firearm no more accidentally fired by itself than your automobile can accidentally start itself and run you over. A round must be chambered and the trigger must be pulled. In very rare instances, the firearm does malfunction, such as a slam fire when put into battery. In any case, the user in this instance neglected to follow one of the simplest rules of gun safety, empty your weapon before cleaning. Calling it anything but a negligent discharge only perpetuates the myth that all firearms are inherently dangerous and that nobody should have them.

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bnkrazy
April 18, 2008, 12:38 PM
Hey, from the looks of it you're the same ambush from 2A. If so, good to see you and thanks for asking about Monty and all your support. :)

As far as editing, I think the main points are well covered, I'd maybe change only a few things:

While we would all agree it was a tragic event, let’s label it what it really was, negligence. Most folks would call this an accident, however, your knowledgeable firearm enthusiast would call this a negligent discharge. The first rule of cleaning any firearm is to clear your weapon. Considering the outcome of this event, the officer neglected to do just that. A firearm can no more fire itself than your automobile can start itself and run you over. A round must be chambered and the trigger must be pulled. In very rare instances, the firearm does malfunction, such as a slam fire when put into battery. In any case, the user in this instance neglected to follow one of the simplest rules of gun safety, always point the gun in a safe direction. This simple rule would have kept this negligent discharge just that, instead of turning it into a horrible tragedy. Calling it anything but a negligent discharge only perpetuates the myth that all firearms are inherently dangerous and that nobody should have them.

ambush
April 18, 2008, 12:41 PM
Thanks bnkrazy, yea, its me. I'm sending it in now, your edits helped a lot. see ya over there!

Elza
April 18, 2008, 12:46 PM
Most folks would call this an accident, however, your knowledgeable firearm enthusiast would call this a negligent discharge.
Most folks would call this an accident. However, your knowledgeable firearm enthusiast would call this a negligent discharge.

It reads a bit easier this way. Otherwise you've summed it up clearly and succinctly.

ambush
April 18, 2008, 12:46 PM
Thanks, letter sent.

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