A lawsuit to end all lawsuits...


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Preacherman
August 21, 2003, 11:41 PM
From the Middle East Media Research Institute (http://www.memri.org/bin/latestnews.cgi?ID=SD55603):

August 22, 2003

Egyptian Jurists to Sue 'The Jews' for Compensation for 'Trillions' of Tons of Gold Allegedly Stolen During Exodus from Egypt

The August 9, 2003 edition of the Egyptian weekly Al-Ahram Al-Arabi featured an interview with Dr. Nabil Hilmi, Dean of the Faculty of Law at the University of Al-Zaqaziq who, together with a group of Egyptian expatriates in Switzerland, is preparing an enormous lawsuit against "all the Jews of the world." The following are excerpts from the interview:

Dr. Hilmi: "… Since the Jews make various demands of the Arabs and the world, and claim rights that they base on historical and religious sources, a group of Egyptians in Switzerland has opened the case of the so-called 'great exodus of the Jews from Pharaonic Egypt.' At that time, they stole from the Pharaonic Egyptians gold, jewelry, cooking utensils, silver ornaments, clothing, and more, leaving Egypt in the middle of the night with all this wealth, which today is priceless."

Question: "What will the group of Egyptians in Switzerland do about this issue?"

Hilmi: "Dr. Gamil Yaken, vice president of the Egyptian community in Switzerland, came to Egypt to collect information. We set up a legal team to prepare the necessary legal confrontation aimed at restoring what the Jews stole a long time ago, to which the statute of limitations cannot possibly apply. Furthermore, [the theft] is based on their holy book, the same source on which they relied when they invaded other peoples…

"The Egyptian Pharaoh was surprised one day to discover thousands of Egyptian women crying under the palace balcony, asking for help and complaining that the Jews stole their clothing and jewels, in the greatest collective fraud history has ever known.

"The theft was not limited to gold alone. The thieves stole everything imaginable. They emptied the Egyptian homes of cooking utensils. One of the women approached Pharaoh, her eyes downcast, and said that her Jewish neighbor who lived in the house on the right of her house had come to her and asked to borrow her gold items, claiming she had been invited to a wedding… The Jewish neighbor took [the items] and promised to return them the next day. A few minutes later, the neighbor to the left knocked on the door and asked to borrow the cooking utensils, because she was having guests for dinner. Using this same deceitful system, they took possession of all the cooking utensils…"

Question: "It is clear why they stole the gold, but why the cooking utensils?"

Hilmi: "Taking posession of the gold was understandable. This is clear theft of a host country's resources and treasure, something that fits the morals and character of the Jews. Yet what was not clear to the Egyptian women were the reasons for stealing the cooking utensils, when other things may have been of greater value. However, one of the Egyptian priets said that this had been the Jews' twisted way throughout history; they seek to cause a minor problem connected with the needs of everyday life so as to occupy people with these matters and prevent them from pursuing them to get back the stolen gold...

"A police investigation revealed that Moses and Aaron, peace be upon them, understood that it was impossible to live in Egypt, despite its pleasures and even though the Egyptians included them in every activity, due to the Jews' perverse nature, to which the Egyptians had reconciled themselves, though with obvious unwillingness. Therefore, an order was issued by the Jewish rabbis to flee the country, and that the exodus should be secret and under cover of darkness and with the largest possible amount of loot. The code word was 'At midnight.' In addition, the Jewish women were told to steal the gold and cooking utensils of the Egyptian women, and that is what happened."

Question: "Did they leave individually or as a group?"

Hilmi: "They left in a convoy of 600,000, that is, about 120,000 families. There were a few wagons in the convoy, and a long line of donkeys loaded with the stolen goods… They crossed the desert in the heart of Sinai, in an attempt to confuse Pharaoh's army, which was on their trail… Later they rested and began to count the stolen gold, and discovered that it reached 300,000 kg of gold."

Question: "But the Jews can cast doubt on this story with their usual methods. What is the religious evidence you said is in the Torah?"

Hilmi:"Naturally, the Jews cast doubt on this story because that is in their interest. But the answer would be that the story is based on what is written in the Torah. It can be found in Exodus, [Chapter] 35, verses 12 through 36…"

Question: "So what arguments can be made in support of getting back our stolen gold?"

Hilmi: "There are two types of claims, one religious and the other legal. From a religious standpoint, all monotheistic religions have called not to steal… It is also in the Ten Commandments, which the Jews were ordered [to observe]. Therefore, they have a basic religious obligation to return what was stolen, if it exists.

"From a legal standpoint, fleeing with the Egyptians' goods could be for the purpose of borrowing or for the purpose of stealing. If it is for the purpose of borrowing, legally it has a temporary dimension, not a permanent dimension, and therefore they must return [the gold], with interest, to its owners.

"On the other hand, if the Jews took the goods from the Egyptians not for the purpose of borrowing it but to keep them for themselves, by legal norms this is theft, and therefore they must return the stolen goods to their owners, in addition to the interest for its use over the entire period of the theft."

Question: "What do you think is the value of the gold, silver, and clothing that was stolen, and how do you calculate their value today?"

Hilmi: "If we assume that the weight of what was stolen was one ton, doubled every 20 years, even if the annual interest is only 5%. In one ton of gold is 700 kg of pure gold – and we must remember that what was stolen was jewelry, that is, alloyed with copper. Hence, after 1,000 years, it would be worth 1,125,898,240 million tons, which equals 1,125,898 billion tons for 1,000 years. In other words, 1,125 trillion tons of gold, that is, a million multiplied by a million tons of gold. This is for one stolen ton. The stolen gold is estimated at 300 tons, and it was not stolen for 1,000 years, but for 5,758 years, by the Jewish reckoning. Therefore, the debt is very large…

"The value must be calculated precisely in accordance with the information collected, and afterward a lawsuit must be filed against all the Jews of the world, and against the Jews of Israel in particular, so they will repay the Egyptians the debt that appears in the Torah."

Question: "Is a compromise solution possible?"

Hilmi: "There may be a compromise solution. The debt can be rescheduled over 1,000 years, with the addition of the cumulative interest during that period."


[I]And good luck getting the State of Israel and the Jews throughout the world to pay that one... :D :D :D

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4v50 Gary
August 21, 2003, 11:55 PM
Bwahahahahahaha! Then the Jews will countersue for reparation for all their years of enslavement. Since Cain slew Abel, nobody gets along in the Middle East. :D

one-shot-one
August 21, 2003, 11:57 PM
:rolleyes:
just point out that all "that" gold was taken by the babalonians (sp) when they invaded.

Futo Inu
August 22, 2003, 12:22 AM
not to mention the thousands of wrongful deaths Moses caused when he let the Red Sea empty back on the heathens chasing him after parting it - that's actionable, but the phrase statute of limitations comes to mind.

NewShooter78
August 22, 2003, 08:02 AM
Has anyone even read Exodus 35, 12-36? Where is there mention of stealing? Not one mention of stealing in those verses. There's mention of people making clothes and bringing offerings to God, but not stealing from the Egyptians.

And I'm not even a religious person! Sheesh! :rolleyes:

C.R.Sam
August 22, 2003, 09:45 AM
Some delay is expected in setting date for trial while attempts are made to locate witnesses.

Sam

XLMiguel
August 22, 2003, 09:58 AM
Just when I thought Slave Reparations was the stupidest thing I'd ever heard, now this.:rolleyes:

Tamara
August 22, 2003, 10:10 AM
Just when I thought Slave Reparations...

Speaking of which, doesn't this kinda set Hilmi & Co. up for a whopper of a counter-suit? Will the Great Pyramid be moved to Tel Aviv?

Leatherneck
August 22, 2003, 10:35 AM
Now where did I stash that smilie face with the jaw that drops waaayyyy down? :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :D

TC
TFL Survivor

buzz_knox
August 22, 2003, 10:56 AM
I'm thinking of filing a class action lawsuit against Adam and Eve for disobeying God and eating the apple, thereby subjecting humanity to a eons of torment and suffering. Who's with me?

MJRW
August 22, 2003, 11:00 AM
He's trying to get interest? Man, I can't wait until Israel asks for the back rent on the pyramids.

BigC
August 22, 2003, 11:36 AM
I have it on good authority, That all that gold is sitting in a bank in the middle of Beverly Hills. In sombody else's name. :p

M67
August 22, 2003, 01:50 PM
Some delay is expected in setting date for trial while attempts are made to locate witnesses.

Sam Sam, if I was to ask all THR members who are expecting a subpoena, to raise a hand... would that be impertinent? :D

OK, I would like to take this opportunity to submit my application for the "Get a Life Award": The total amount of gold produced in the history of the world is some 120,000 metric tons. Of this an estimated 2% was dug up before 1492 AD. That is 2400 tons. How much of that before 1500 BC? Shall we be generous and say half? If so, the claim is that Jewish housewives stole 1/4 (one quarter) of all the gold in the world from Egyptian housewives. Wow.

The real jaw-dropper here is that the Mother-of-all-lawsuits involves Egyptians living in Switzerland. Surely no real American can let foreigners beat them at their own national sport? Who is going to take up the gauntlet? :neener:

Standing Wolf
August 22, 2003, 02:28 PM
Well, if it keeps a few assault lawyers off the streets for awhile...

Graystar
August 22, 2003, 02:43 PM
Has anyone even read Exodus 35, 12-36? Where is there mention of stealing? Not one mention of stealing in those verses. There's mention of people making clothes and bringing offerings to God, but not stealing from the Egyptians. Didn't you see the movie??? Get with it man! :neener:

Bainx
August 22, 2003, 03:17 PM
Well, if it keeps a few assault lawyers off the streets for awhile...

Please don't get me started on lawyers again!:banghead:

Art Eatman
August 22, 2003, 03:37 PM
It's only fair that all Jews now living who left Egypt with that gold, should repay all those Egyptians now living who lost gold to them.

:), Art

RON in PA
August 22, 2003, 04:05 PM
This Jew has all that gold and I'm not giving back until the Egyptians reimburse me for my ancestors' slavery.

On a more serious note, this should be viewed as an example of the antisemitism that spews forth from the Arab press on a daily basis, note the stereotypical portrayal of the Jews as unethical and thieves. The Arabs have learned well from the Nazis and communists.

Skunkabilly
August 22, 2003, 04:09 PM
LOL. Next thing the Sea Creatures (Loch Ness, Lake Champlain (sp?), etc.) will sue the government for not protecting them from asteroid strikes that wiped all the other dinosaurs out.

Waitone
August 22, 2003, 04:34 PM
Maybe if we can get the lawyers to fight it out, normal mortals on both sides can take a breather, drink a beer, plant a fig tree, and enjoy the martial sight of lawyers trying to gut shoot each other. Maybe the Palestinians can get the concessions franchise.

Sounds like progress to me.

rock jock
August 22, 2003, 04:47 PM
Next up: Trial lawyers sue God for allowing man to have free will, which inevitably led to the Fall and the introduction of evil into the world. A spokeman for the trial lawyers stated: "We have have always believed in our heart that we were divine. Now, we are asking the Almighty to convey upon us His powers and possessions as compensation."

gun-fucious
August 22, 2003, 05:12 PM
but the egyptians stole the gold from the nubians

spartacus2002
August 22, 2003, 05:22 PM
[B]but the egyptians stole the gold from the nubians[?B]


"What's a nubian?" (name the movie).:D

Skunkabilly
August 22, 2003, 05:38 PM
I dunno but doesn't El Tejon always use that word? :D

Quartus
August 22, 2003, 05:54 PM
the phrase statute of limitations comes to mind.



SPOILSPORT!!! :D


Actually, I was kinda wondering about jurisdictional issues....

MeekandMild
August 22, 2003, 06:08 PM
Yea, right. This is really from theonion.com, right?

MJRW
August 22, 2003, 08:07 PM
Spartacus,

Shut the f$%& up! Now Vader, he's a spiritual brother, with the force and all that s$%&. Then this cracker Skywalker gets his hands on a light-saber, and the boy decides he's gonna run the f$%&*@g universe - gets a whole Klan of whites together, and they're gonna bust up Vader's 'hood the Death Star.

NewShooter78
August 22, 2003, 09:42 PM
"You're chasing Amy."

"***** what you don't know about me I could just about fit into the Grand ******* Canyon!"

4v50 Gary
August 22, 2003, 09:55 PM
The wait for witnesses will end with the Second Coming & the Resurrection. :D Hopefully the case is dismissed by the Power that B.

Langenator
August 22, 2003, 10:46 PM
the phrase statute of limitations comes to mind.

Actually, this nut's way around any statute of limitations is the theory the "the Jews" are somehow still in posession of all this loot (does that mean Prime Minister Sharon is cooking with 3000 year old cooking utensils?) and that since they are still in possession of said property, they can still be sued. Of course, and my history may be off a bit here, but wouldn't the Romans have taken said gold (and kitchen utensils, of course) away from the Jews when they got fed up with the Jewish rebellions and destroyed the Temple and scattered the Jews?

And for anyone who is interested, Exodus 35:1-36. I included the extra verses because it includes the context. I think they're talking about how they built that portable Temple ("Tent of Meeting") that the Jews humped around the Sinai Desert for 40 years.

http://www.biblegateway.com/cgi-bin/bible?passage=Exodus+35%3A1-36&NIV_version=yes&language=english&x=13&y=12

Now, the lawsuit I'd love to see: a class action, on behalf of "the Jews" against this Egytian idiot and all the state sponsored media in Muslim nations that spew this kind of anti-Semitic BS, for defamation of character, maybe even libel.

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