When I become Dictator...


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sm
March 12, 2009, 04:58 AM
...every new born is going to get a single shot .22 rifle, ammo, eye/ ear protection, spinner target.
Ah heck, I'm even gonna toss in a couple of cases of Popeye Spinach so they will have tin cans to shoot as well.

Every newborn is gonna get a pocket knife, with carbon steel blades and pocket stone. Parents are gonna parent, and mentors are gonna mentor kids on shooting, knife use, and other mindsets and skillsets that will enable to them to be self reliant.

Folks are not going to be dressed without a pocket knife.
Knives will be back in Schools, and every teacher's desk will have a sharpening stone/diamond stone for sharpening.

Kids will not only have guns in schools to shoot, they will also be encouraged to bring guns to school for Show-n-Tell, Shop ,History and Speech Classes, Archery will be in schools too.
Those simple Ben Pearson archery sets ...aw...heck, granted the schools will have these, I might as well make this part of the "newborn kit".

<frames hands>

Whatcha think about Mumbley-Peg Contests? The schools will have these for each grade, and the winners compete against the winners of other schools?

Yeah!

Me too!
<makes notes to add this to agenda>

Ya know, I ain't ever robbed a train, or shot from a Train.
When I become Dictator, trains are gonna have the Caboose!
A twain is supposed to have a Caboose!

When I become Dictator, Chicago is not going to be anything like the Chicago today.
Keep the ball fields, museums and stuff like that.

Have a neat dealie in Chicago where folks can shoot from trains. I am sure we can come up with some neat Targets, of all types, for any firearm platform.

Some serious fun, with folks getting to rob trains. Then some serious lessons on Strategy & Tactics on how to rob a train, and how to defend one being robbed.

I figure Chicago has some political buildings that will convert into some indoor ranges.


When I become Dictator...
You know Alan Jackson set a record for the longest line dance with his hit "Good Time".

I want to set a record for the longest firing line.
Just along the border.
Targets will be placed South.
You figure it out.

When I become Dictator...

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CoRoMo
March 12, 2009, 10:10 AM
Now that is art!

Now where's my voting ballot?

MikePGS
March 12, 2009, 10:29 AM
You know I'm surprised that you didn't mention changing the standard issue round of the military to 28 gauge :neener:

hlq
March 12, 2009, 11:41 AM
Good post, thanks for the laugh this morning!

Every newborn is gonna get a pocket knife, with carbon steel blades and pocket stone. Parents are gonna parent, and mentors are gonna mentor kids on shooting, knife use, and other mindsets and skillsets that will enable to them to be self reliant.

One year at the school Christmas party we exchanged names for gifts and my bud got my name. When I opened the present low and behold a nice little two blade folder! Even the teacher thought it was a pretty cool gift. The only caveat was that she made me put it in my pocket until I got home. :eek:

The good old days..

PTK
March 12, 2009, 12:10 PM
Folks are not going to be dressed without a pocket knife.

I still don't consider people who refuse to carry a knife as "adult".

I've said it before, I'll say it again: Steve has some dang good advice and really has his head on straight regarding the world.

KBintheSLC
March 12, 2009, 02:15 PM
When I become Dictator

The only problem is that the things you described would not enable a dictatorship to occur. You really have to disarm the people if you want to be a dictator.

Texpatriate
March 12, 2009, 02:21 PM
He's a benevolent dictator though. :D Not too many of those in history.

How about some yard darts for the kit?

sm
March 12, 2009, 05:42 PM
When I become Dictator...

Ford is gonna make the 70's era Brono, the "Bullitt" Mustang...
Chevy is gonna do the '61 and '73 Vette, '69 1/2 Camero, '69 Chevelle, ...
Mopar (Chrylser) is gonna do '70 Challenger with 340 Six Packs, Chargers with 440 magnums and Baracuda's...

Last one to the shooting range is a rotten egg. And I is gonna blow the doors of that 'Cuda again, you'll see.


When I become Dictator...

This Old Thang is gonna be a Firearm Mfg for Ladies firearms, and related equipment.

It Was On Sale is gonna be a Ammo company for Ladies too.

Well, heckfire, them ladies been trying to tell us guys since the dawn of time what they want, and ain't nobody been listening.
Its about time someone did, and I "are" the one to change all this.


When I become Dictator...

I am going to set up some land, and all the criminals are invited with Free Guns, Ammo, Dope and whatever the heck else .

Gonna be a Perimeter set up, once the criminals are in, they stays in. Part of the perimeter will be manned by trains...
They have to put up with one another and deal with each other. They will not be able to escape...

I mean , for instance, we gots that training dealie in Chicago with the Trains set up for a reason , remember?
...how to rob a train, how to defend against being robbed...

Yeah don't tell me I don't knowed about Strategy & Tactics...

This here Criminal Colony gets low on guns and ammo, from killing each other, just fly over and drop what they need.

I gots other idears about crime too...


When I become Dictator...

Mot45acp
March 12, 2009, 08:48 PM
tag.

skeet king
March 13, 2009, 12:00 AM
Just remeber a democracy is the worst kind of government, except for all the others

mnrivrat
March 13, 2009, 12:33 AM
Just remeber a democracy is the worst kind of government, except for all the others

That's why we were establishesd as a Republic !

sm - Ya got my vote ! ( As long as you bring back the Studebaker Hawk and Alvanti so's I can compete with the Cuda's & Mustangs)

sm
March 13, 2009, 01:03 AM
No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the sources of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed, and love of power.
- P. J. O'Rourke

When I become Dictator...

I figger we can run some test on some folks we currently do bidness with overseas, and then by imposing a stupid, and greed tax our Nat'l debt will be paid off in short order.


When I become Dictator...

While the Criminal Colony is taking care of crime stuff...

All the former crooked politicians housed in a structure designed to capture hot air and bull chips, will-
- No shortage of energy during the winter.
-Fertilizer bidness gonna do real good.

slabuda
March 13, 2009, 01:28 AM
The trouble with "when I am dictator" "The People" will be worse off than they are now.

Dictatorship is to Freedom as Satan is to Christ

In a dictatorship no mater how much you agree with the ruling party you are still not free. The followers of Chavez in Venezuela, Nazis in Germany and Marxists in 1930's Russia, while agreeable with their rulers were still not free.

Even though I may love to have everyone have guns I would be saddened by not giving "The People" the choice to have guns.

The greatest words ever penned by man begin with "We the People..."

PS it still is a fun thread though ;)

Tinman357
March 13, 2009, 02:42 AM
I don't often say this.... But you and I are of like mind. I do miss some of the past times.........:(

sm
March 13, 2009, 03:29 AM
I am using the term Dictator as a fun thing, in case some have not picked up on it.

Besides, a buddy of mine is using the expression When I become King...
So I cannot use "king"

I know a gal that uses the expression When I become HBIC...
[Head ...err...lemmee edit hers...Head Broad In Charge...]
So since I am guy, I for sure cannot use that expression.

--

When I become Dictator...

I'm gonna have some kids show up, gather around, and I will read The Old Man And The Boy by Robert Ruark to them.

Civil Disobedience by Henry David Thoreau is going to be read to me, and others gathered by bigger kids.

Any and all books that have been placed on a Banned List for Public Schools, are going to be put back in Schools.

Reloading Shotgun Shells and Metallic Cartridges will be added to curricula as "shop classes" in schools.

Proud Boer
March 13, 2009, 03:37 AM
sm,

Can't wait for the advent of your dictatorship! I will move to your country immediately.

Please dont forget as part of your social program to supply,for free, all comlibs and other assorted socialists with microwave ovens......those 60 seater models!

ThrottleJockey
March 13, 2009, 04:00 AM
I wouldn't want to be "dicktater", nor king, as I am already Emperor. My Empire Includes you as dictator of this particular planet! But I rule over many others as well, with my super black evil laser cannon full auto drone army(just to keep the "aliens" at bay)......LOL

cliffy
March 13, 2009, 04:18 AM
Hopefully, America will not become a "third world power" as we approach the twenty-first Century in earnest. Computers have "enslaved" us all more swiftly than we could have realized. Shooting from the hip has quleched most ability to do so. "Problem-Solvers" have been replaced with computer-problem-solvers. I believe computers resent our attempts to "correct" their flaws. cliffy

gvnwst
March 13, 2009, 11:16 AM
So, how do we go around nominating this guy? I can't wait to vote!

Are you going to get rid of the ATF, it would make some dandy convienance stores...:D

sm
March 13, 2009, 11:49 AM
When I become Dictator...
My stimulus package is gonna be the acronym FATC (pronounced "fats")

Firearms, Alcohol, Tobacco & Caffeine.

Snag what you need, no tax, no paper drill...and plenty more where that come from.

*i-are-gonna-be-good-at-dictatorship*

Robert
March 13, 2009, 11:52 AM
sm is loose again, somebody get the net...

sm
March 13, 2009, 12:14 PM
When I become Dictator...

County Fairs are going back to having "gallery guns" and real "turkey shoots".

For you whippersnappers:
-.22 rim-fire rifles shooting various targets.
-tie a live turkey behind a log and pop that sucker when his head pop up out from behind that log.

-
Hardware stores, bait shops, fillin' stations, grocery stores...etc., will again sell loose ctgs, to anyone.

For you whippersnappers:
- back in the day a kid could turn in a soda bottle for 2 pennies, then later 3 pennies.
So a kid could could buy however many .22 rim-fire ctgs they could afford with the soda bottle return money.

-Kids went to the store for parents, or neighbors, and sometimes for running these errands, a kid could pick out however many of what kind of ctg, or shell they were told they have for running this errand.

-Anyone could buy loose ctgs, or shotgun shells. Even just one .22 rim-fire to replace the one used to fell a squirrel, one .410 to replace the one used to pop that dove while hanging clothes on the clothesline, one .38spl used to put down a cow, or the one "thutty-thutty" that felled a deer.

Which reminds me...

Open day of Dove season will be a National Holiday. No school, no work, no nuttin'.

Them "gray missiles" need felling and cooking up...

Glasstream15
March 13, 2009, 12:33 PM
"Ford is gonna make the 70's era Brono, the "Bullitt" Mustang...
Chevy is gonna do the '61 and '73 Vette, '69 1/2 Camero, '69 Chevelle, ...
Mopar (Chrylser) is gonna do '70 Challenger with 340 Six Packs, Chargers with 440 magnums and Baracuda's..."

Don't forget that we will need a '49 Ford Flathead. Not the baddest but definitely the best sounding engine ever created on God's Green Earth. And we need a rebirth of the '53 Studebaker Lowe Coupe. Shove a Caddy V8 in and you have the most beautiful car ever built.

chinacave
March 13, 2009, 03:02 PM
All cell phones will permanently set on vibrate ONLY!!!!!!!!

OAKVILLE SHOOTER
March 13, 2009, 03:41 PM
It is not too late to get your name on the 2012 ballot. In fact you would probably be the first one.

You got my vote without even seeing the competition.

Brian Dale
March 13, 2009, 04:29 PM
Mmmm...something with a 454 engine, and an International Scout. Texpatriate beat me to it: lawn darts for gym class. Marksmanship, science and math all required before high school.

I'll vote for ya.

sm
March 13, 2009, 07:55 PM
When I become Dictator...

Gauge: 28 gauge

Bird: Quail

Fruits : Fried Apple Pies, Blackberry Cobblers, 'Maters,

Song for when ijit countries come to visit:
Pissing in the Wind by Jerry Jeff Walker

Sandwich Hot : Bacon & 'Mater.
Sandwich Cold : Peanut Butter and Blackberry Jam.

Centerfire Rifle Ctg: "Thutty-Thutty" .

Hot Drink: Coffee black.
Soft Drink: Dr. Pepper and Royal Crown (otherwise known as RC).

Lighter: Zippo

Salad: Spinach, with the hot oil bacon dressing

Rimfire: Rimfire period, including the Winchester and Federal crimped brass case "rat shot"

Sunglasses: Ray Ban Aviators

Bikini: Yeller, and Teal blue

Dawg: Black Lab

Cookware: Cast Iron.

Cat: Dead Feral

Walkalong
March 13, 2009, 10:36 PM
Folks are not going to be dressed without a pocket knife. I did for grade school, and I still do. :)

Keep it coming, your doin' fine. :D

CapnMac
March 13, 2009, 10:49 PM
Bikini: Yeller, and Teal blue
Naw, polky-dotted can be fun too--how 'bout a rul of no 'kini's bigger'n oh size 15; and a colateral rule about no miniskirts sold wider than they are tall (HTG, wallyworld has 'em in 28 <aiaiaiaiaiee-ick>

sm
March 13, 2009, 11:41 PM
When I become Dictator....


Re: Publik Skools.

-None of this uniform bidness.
I will respect Parochial schools as they have done with boys wearing ties and girls wearing skirts.
Ditto for Military Schools

The rest of this touchy feel good stuff is like Communist countries having "good little citizens" in school.


-Special Dress Days.

Spaghetti Western Day.
Kids can show up with their lever actions, coach guns, and six shooters.

Godfather Day.
Violin cases with Thompsons, Lupra's, ...
Contests for doing the best impersonation of Marlon Brando...

70's Era Day.
Kid wear tie dye , bell bottoms, and parents bring kids to school in Muscle Cars, and HS /College kids have street racing in Muscle Cars.

The kid that shows up with the best single shot .22 rifle and single shot shotgun with tie dye paint job that shows under blacklight, gets a slew of ammo and copy of Allman Brothers at Fillmore East.

Bee Gee's Day.
Barney Day.

This is the day there are no lessons, just kids shoot Bee Gee album covers, albums, 8 track, cassette...anything Bee Gee...

Barney Day runs in conjunction with Bee Gee Day. Kids have all sorts of Barney stuff for parents, adults, anyone to shoot. From Targets to stuffed animals, to cassette tapes, to ...
Adults pay a fee to shoot.
Kids get all the money to use for whatever they want firearm related.

Kids are gonna be rich , I tell ya!

Studypuppy Day.
This one is for the girls/ladies.
See the guys dress like the dude in the Diet Coke commercial, or Tom Selleck, or Sam Elliot, or whatever StudPuppy the gals determine.

Guys have to carry the guns, ammo, and basically cater to the gals while they shoot that day.


Scarface Day.
This one is planned when the weeds and brush need taken care of.
Flamethrowers will be provided.
Contests on whom can "clear" their area the fastest. Prizes of guns, ammo, knives, archery...whatever.

hadmanysons
March 14, 2009, 12:03 AM
Let me tell you about my friends moon base...

jbkebert
March 14, 2009, 12:04 AM
Hail to the Chief. I hear the music playing now.

miconoakisland
March 14, 2009, 01:27 AM
Hey y'all, Cuba's kinda iffy about now! How 'bout y'all show up en-mass and take over and create a brand new country?! The inhabitants will revel in their new found freedom, and the new US influx will guarantee wealth for everyone.
You want a utopia? Cuba is just waiting for a US-favored takeover.

Restorer
March 14, 2009, 02:43 PM
Song for when ijit countries come to visit:
Pissing in the Wind by Jerry Jeff Walker

Cat: Dead Feral

Bee Gee's Day.
Barney Day.

This is the day there are no lessons, just kids shoot Bee Gee album covers, albums, 8 track, cassette...anything Bee Gee...

Barney Day runs in conjunction with Bee Gee Day. Kids have all sorts of Barney stuff for parents, adults, anyone to shoot. From Targets to stuffed animals, to cassette tapes, to ...
Adults pay a fee to shoot.
Kids get all the money to use for whatever they want firearm related.


Your campaign promises better include a new keyboard on every desk, because you owe me a new one. Mine is now coated with coffee.

I formally nominate you as the THR (non)party candidate.

Titan6
March 14, 2009, 03:53 PM
How are you going to stay dictator if you give away all those guns? Don't you know the first rule of becoming a dictator is to take the guns away from people? Especially the kids.

Brian Dale
March 14, 2009, 04:04 PM
Don't you know the first rule of becoming a dictator is to take the guns away from people?Sometimes you just gotta break the rules. :D

Brian Williams
March 14, 2009, 10:13 PM
Can I be your Sec of State I will promise to take a battalion of Marines where ever I go... and maybe one Texas Ranger.(a real honest to goodness one, not some bozo kicking people).

2RCO
March 14, 2009, 10:27 PM
SM always has some good stuff...occasional ramblings but always interesting.

newdude
March 14, 2009, 10:30 PM
I formally nominate you as the THR (non)party candidate.


I vote, i vote!!!!!

sm
March 15, 2009, 12:21 AM
When I become Dictator...

...public hangings, firing squads, gas chambers and electric chairs are going to be put to use.
Gonna televise these killin's too.

Granted we gots a Criminal Colony, and that is where some of the folks in prison will go when I become Dictator.
As said before, some criminal will have an "invite" and some ain't gonna have a choice.
They made their choice, now they can just fight to survive as long as they can, or get it over with quickly.

Deterrent.

Now a typical teenager that sneaks out a car, and sneaks a bottle out the bar at home and is apprehended...

Ain't gonna be none of this DUI and tying up time and paperdrill ...
Ain't gonna be none of them WWADD (whiny women against drunk drivers) carrying on about "somebody gotta do something!". Not gonna have any of this crap about "gubmint gotta make vehicles with breath machines..."

Listen Toots, ain't no way in hell a 70's era Bronco , or a Bullitt 'Stang gonna have such nonsense. You got it!

Officers will have that "chat" with that teenager.

Teens are teens, always have been , always will. Good grief, some folks done forgot them years bodies changed, hormones raged and studying anatomy by the glow of the dashboard light.

Teens are gonna get "that one" free ticket on some stuff.


That said...

Open season on anyone sexually assaulting anyone, battering, beating and abusing...
Just shoot the sumbitch, call it in , and the bodies will picked up and disposed of.


Folks gonna be civil and polite.
Early on some serious cleaning and straightening up will be need to done...after a bit, light dusting from time to time is all that'll be needed.

ThrottleJockey
March 15, 2009, 12:47 AM
I volunteer for sec of interior!!!

I think the best policy to deter crime and save money would be for you to require everyone over 18(drinking age, old enough to die for it, old enough to drink in it) to carry a .45 , I mean, who in the hell is gonna use it in a crime knowing good and well everyone else has one too, and will likely plug his/her azz.

newdude
March 15, 2009, 12:54 AM
Hey, can't you at least make it a 10mm auto, i mean, while the .45 is great and all, you get more mag capacity with the 10mm....:neener::D

sm
March 15, 2009, 05:12 AM
When I become Dictator...

Dept of Grins: Art Eatman.

His jukebox in his home office, will double as a rifle rest. Gonna put wheels on this here jukebox, as the boy might wanna shoot outside.

Terlingua Three Step:

1.Drop a dime in the jukebox.
2.Critter in crosshairs.
3. Misty...


Dept. of Caboose & Cardinals: Jeff White.

He'll be taking care of trains and baseball.

Now them ball players are gonna play ball like in the old days.
Be good role models and all...
Oh...being Dictator and all, I gets to play the 'hot spot' as I was damn good at shortstop. Just from time to time. Oh I could field a ball, so I might get a wild hair and play any position like Left Field when a long hitter comes to plate.
I ain't that old, and it helps I never grew up...

Gonna have to get Jeff White up to speed on them Trius One Steps though.
Tunnels gonna have to be sure they tall enough for ...

...picture a train going around a curve.
Trius One Step on the Engine and Caboose for sure, other cars too.
Folks can stand atop the train cars and shoot them clays.
They can stand on them flat cars, or from within box cars and shoot too.

This ought to be a hoot!

We could have fun tripping Trius One Steps and launching clays into the Criminal Colony, from the trains that run around the Colony and driving them criminals nuts too!

"How far do you lead a crack-head?"
"About 3 "coke" bottles".


Dept of Clays: Will Fennell & Dave McCracken.
I ain't worried about what them boys have in mind.


Dept. of E.S.P: hso and JShirley.
I figger them boys can handle anything Edged, Sharp, and Pointy.


Dept of Southern Belles: springmom

I ain't had the gal's fish tacos, homemade preserves, or anything else she cooks.
I figure if'n I give her a Dept, I gets free samples.

I might be Dictator, still gonna be a dumb old southern boy at heart, working his southern charms.

"Darlin' I needs to sample them brownies before we allow them in publik skools".


That is just for starters.

I figger illegal aliens will take one look at what all is going on and run back home.

"Them folks are nuts! It is like one big Redneck Event over there! Folks shooting clays from trains, shooting clays at criminals in a colony, jukeboxes that double a shooting rests, and some gal baking brownies with Miranda Lambert"s Gunpowder & Lead cranked up!

Yeah well so be it...
Folks not from around these parts tend not to unnerstand stuff anyways...

Bill_Rights
March 15, 2009, 12:03 PM
I had forgotten about Mumbly Peg! Whatcha think about Mumbley-Peg Contests? The schools will have these for each grade, and the winners compete against the winners of other schools? Had to look it up! This version of the game (http://www.inquiry.net/outdoor/games/beard/mumbly_peg.htm) is much more extensive than I played....

servantofinari
March 16, 2009, 03:52 AM
God i Love the Swiss, god willing we will one day see this in colorado.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/5/53/Caroline-Migros-p1000507.jpg sorry about the size...:confused:

ThrottleJockey
March 16, 2009, 04:15 AM
SM, don't forget to burn all the WallyWorlds!

ThrottleJockey
March 16, 2009, 04:16 AM
oops

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