[Joe Demko]

Gunboards, like bars, seem to be places where folks feel free to, shall we say, stretch the truth a bit in the interest of a good story. I've read some real doozies over the ears, but let's just list our real favorites.
Mine was on AR15.com several years ago, when I still frequented that place. In a "Samurai vs. European Knight" thread, a gentleman who claimed to be an expert in use of the katana jumped into the discussion. He claimed to own a number of handmade katana, one of which would "slice beer bottles" in half. He claimed that he would hang the bottles by the neck from a string, and then slice them with the sword. He was emphatic that the sword was actually slicing the glass, too.

Edited for clarity.

[Preacherman]

I seem to recall a thread on TFL where some idjit claimed that either he, or his brother (or something like that), had converted a Glock to fire .454 Casull...

:what: :rolleyes: :scrutiny:

[Sean Smith]

The original Mall Ninja thread, the one where the guy claimed he duct-taped armor panels to his back.

Another one, obviously a joke, was where folks kept making up more insane fictional handgun calibers.. I think I eventually claimed victory with the .700 CrazyBastardMagnumButtStomper, which could destroy an entire building full of ballistic gelatin blocks. It might have been related to the ".454 Casull Glock" thread, I forget.

[Mark Tyson]

"Concrete piercing M-16 bullets that can sever a human being's limbs."

[Greg L]

Mall Ninja is at the top of my list.

Greg

[Navy joe]

Yep, definitely the .454 Ragin Glock with Titanium! barrel. Kid on GT (Doomfish) never did 'splain how the rounds fir in the magwell.

Or, anything that Gunkid, Hardin, Commando, Gomer, et. al ever said.

[HankB]

I remember a discussion concerning a gunshop (with a fancy website) that was advertising an "accurizing" service. They had a testimonial about a target shooter whose .308 bolt gun came in for their special treatment.

After the rifle was rebuilt, the owner was delighted - he routinely started shooting five shot, one-hole groups with the "new" rifle.

He was doing it at 600 yards.

And was using iron sights.

Worst case, with all the shots strung along one axis, that's still less than 0.2 MOA . . . which is mighty fine shooting. :rolleyes:

[45R]

Glock Perfection. :D

[El Tejon]

Anything with bears, especially the mutant zombie kind that know martial arts.:D

[Oleg Volk]

"Of course I fight for freedom! I buried my rifle out back, didn't I?"

[Mike Irwin]

Some jackass either on TFL or the old Compuserve Firearms Forum who claimed to be able to shoot sub 10" groups at over a mile.

With a .308.

[Outlander]

I love it when everyone who owns a .22 says straight out of the box they'll shoot 1/2" groups at 50 yards ... with iron sights.
1/2" seems to be the magic number with CZs, 10/22s and Remingtons, not to mention the high priced rifles.

[MJRW]

"I shoot 1/4" groups


at 150 yards


off hand


with a Hi-point


and eyes closed


between the legs


while a violent monkey dry humps my shooting arm


standing on my head


while playing a piano with my other hand."

You get the idea.

[Preacherman]

MJRW - forgotten to take your meds today, have you?

:neener: :p :D

[Mike Irwin]

"while a violent monkey dry humps my shooting arm"

He's not joking, Preacherman.

I've seen how he shoots! :what:

[Hkmp5sd]

In the opening battle, the tank unit fired two 120 mm high velocity depleted uranium rounds straight down the main road,creating a powerful vacuum that literally sucked guerrillas out from their hideaways into the street where they were shot down by small arms fire or run over by the tanks.

[sm]

-"Millon Mom March"
-"Assault Pistols".
-" Evil Black Guns"
-" We are here to Protect You".

[GySgt]

Hkmp5sd.......

Now that one I like !!! I wonder how many kids he got to believe that one in Home Economics class !!!;) That's priceless!!

[Dave Markowitz]

SkunkApe's thread about CCW at a nudist colony.

[Cosmoline]

The katana seems to attract bizarre fanboys. Go to any "Kill Bill" forum and you'll find them in droves.

I've found this bio thread on the guns.ru forum to be most amusing:

http://ub8.homepagetools.com/modern_firearms/UltraBoard.pl?Action=ShowPost&Board=offtopic&Post=8&Idle=10&Sort=0&Order=Descend&Page=0&Session=

http://groups.msn.com/_Secure/0TADUAqQXZaBQh7OPaf2XTX7YVv*IKQQ437vcenhObqbIN*hInyaEH*ozM6mAQJ7d96ntXY02fhuGwQPoDICbi7SNY0oMvfAnlOjXrKW*Ux9qgSE5gvs2Mg/NinjaScott.JPG?dc=4675414285709980399

http://groups.msn.com/_Secure/0TAD7AjAXmYFoWJv!WW0IYSVWsfA62hde*wCnoove3se1V8wj9Q6Hg0tMrcnZIsn*8lPMzDbQRH4Hi72O1HfMhfDiMXHU6hdiU07ayS8da2wRNaaqCa9!9w/cool%20guy.JPG?dc=4675419783517084217

[Mark Tyson]

There's fuel for your nightmares!

[RTFM]

Not a gun board thread, but from a maintenance manager I worked with.

Said in "Nam" His huey was crashing and just before it hit the dirt he jumped out with his M-60 and fired at the dirt. The recoil slowing his fall, and the rounds impacting the dirt made it like a 'soft bed of feathers'

I laughed so hard at him I damn near passed out, then I raised the B.F. flag and split a gut again.

He was so pissed at me for calling him on that, when I said he probably was no where near Vietnam, ever,he did not dispute the fact.
(A real Vet would have kicked my a$$ for telling them there were never there)

RTFM

[Skunkabilly]

"You Might Be a Tactical Poser If...." on Cult of the P7 and Koga Shuko's poser photos on HKPRO.

Cosmoline, how'd my picture get up there? :scrutiny:

[Checkman]

Cosmoline-

Well the masked Ninja is fourteen. I seem to remember having some oddball ideas myself when I was that age. Boy has it been over twenty years already? But you're right, that bio and some of the others on that thread are pretty funny. I feel downright puny. I was military intelligence when I was on active duty in the Army and I spent more time mowing lawns and working in the motor pool then I did battling evil secret agents.

[Ed]

Cosmoline, that link was hillarious:D "I have never held a gun, but here is a list of 529 that I have looked at" :D

[QuarterBoreGunner]

Ohhhh the mind reels- if only I could remember them all.

The one I just saw on another board while discussing the S&W 500:

"What's the big deal with a 50? Colt has been making the 50 caliber Desert Eagle for years. Rounds used to sell for $5 each, though. "

Made me alternately laugh and cringe.

I was saved from the chore of correcting him when a gang of 12 - 14 year old CounterStrike junkies, most eloquently and politely, related to him that, he was in fact, misinformed.

[spacemanspiff]

ooo ooooooo! i got one!

"i carry a walther p22. its mad concealable and has stopping power."

and...

"i'd send you a gun in the mail, but since i dont really know you plus the feds could get me in trouble for doing so, i wont".

[Correia]

From a thread in Rifles awhile back:

"Snipers in vietnam could hit targets from a mile away, they used a .50 machine gun caseing necked down to a 7mm(prolly a special one). My dad talked to two snipers at Doung Wan with this set up and said the best shoot was almost 2 miles (clean head shot), the thing they were worried about was someone walking in front of the target because it takes so long to get there."

[Moparmike]

I shoot half-inch groups at 3 miles with my 16in main turret gun (Iowa class) necked down to .17...

:evil: :neener: :rolleyes:


The more savvy among you will be racing to remind me that the 16in guns didnt have cases to neck down, and used enough powder to reload for a batallion of Marines...:scrutiny:

[spacemanspiff]

this thread is classic. (http://66.80.73.51/showthread.php?s=&threadid=17797&perpage=25&highlight=stopping%20power&pagenumber=1)

[Mark Tyson]

This entire thread is hilarious. It reinforces the old adage: Better to remain silent and appear ignorant, than open your mouth and remove all doubt.

[Zundfolge]

Some of my favorites:

The shockwave from a .50BMG is so powerful that a bullet flying by your head will kill you.

Being shot by [insert caliber larger then .22 here] will knock you back 10 feet.

Bullets from an M16 "tumble end over end" thats why they cause so much damage.

And every time someone tells me they found [insert famous and/or expensive gun here] at a gun show or estate sale for $50 I have to laugh.

[Mark Tyson]

Bullets from an M16 "tumble end over end" thats why they cause so much damage.

I actually heard someone say that on a History channel special. The speaker was a guy at the Army ordnance museum - can't recall his name.

[Stickjockey]

Anyone here that also surf FALFiles remember this guy? (http://www.falfiles.com/forums/showthread.php?=&threadid=69759)

[ceetee]

If you get shot with a .50 DE anywhere in the body, the shock wave will travel through your blood vessels to your brain, and kill you...




No, really!



I mean it! I saw it on the Internet!

[Bainx]

"Shootin' um with a .32 is only gonna make um mad!"

[HABU]

Any of lawdogs stories.:neener:

Sorry lawdog, I couldn't resist!:D

[Ryder]

I visited a gunboard where everyone thought Taurus revolvers were awesome and Ruger's were trash. Couldn't quite figure that one out for a while. I was most perplexed :confused:

Then I discovered the board owner was getting free Taurii for field testing and writing reviews for them.

[Dr.Rob]

Heard at a shooting range BY a guy shooting a Desert Eagle .50:

"5.56mm M-16 rounds were designed to travel in bone marrow.. that's why they are so lethal."

Heard at a gunshow from a guy that wanted to buy my 1954 Colt Commander in 95% condition:

"It's worth at least $250 but I can go as high as three." (It wasn't for sale I was shopping for a holster)

Another gun show classic:

"Oh yes these are very rare and were carried by The Rough Riders at San Juan Hill" (noting rusty SW model 10 M&P's)

Commonly heard/misunderstood:

"You can't own/don't need semiautomatics!"

Still misunderstood:

"The army did away with the .45 long ago." (Well the marines, and other JSOC didn't and a buddy of mine, a Bradley Commander in Gulf war 1 was issued an M-1911A1.)

At the range:

"You can't hit that from here!"

In the woods:

"That's gotta be 600 yards!"

Online:

"I have a federal ccw permit" (But I'm not in the FBI/DEA/US Marshalls/FAM/FEMA/etc etc etc.

In general over the years:

"Savage Rifles are cheaply made and innacurate, real shooters use a Remington (or insert other brand here)"

At TFL/THR:

"Last night while preparing my rural home against 3 hombres my wife chose a 3 inch 44 special loaded with silvertips.. meanwhile I had a shotgun and a boarding cutlass and was on the phone with the local PD.. how did I do?"

"M-16s are jammomatic piles of aluminum and plastic, thay aren't even lethal."

"AK's are crude clubs that happen to fire bullets and only an illiterate third world farmboy would call it a rifle. You can't hit a manhole cover at 100yards with one."

Glocks are perfect.

1911's are devine.

All roads to self defense can be solved by a bunch of us typing safely from our desktops.. but should the need arise a fully loaded array of arcane and dangerous weapons awaits all those who would cross our threshholds.


and my fave:

"The scout rifle is the best thing since sliced bread.. hell since the invention of bread!"

[treeprof]

On a board? Too many to even count on the .223 vs. grizzly thread here on THR a while back.

At a recent gunshow:

Customer looking at Oly ARs: "Is the barrel chrome lined, like on the Bushmasters?"

Vendor "Chrome lined? He** boy, this is a chrome-moly barrel - the whole dam* thing's got chrome all through it, and its STILL cheaper than a Bushmaster".

[grampster]

Gawrsh, I really didn't read anything here that was unreasonable.
Why, I remember the time that I shot that 'loper on the dead run at 800 yards with my trusty lever action .32.......

:what:

[Camel]

Well it wasnt on a gun forum but it was pretty funny. Guy claiming he was an NSA assasain/spy/international man of mystery. He got a royal smacking down from none other than the game's developers, one of whom really is an international man of mystery (Or Army SF at least:p ).

Ill see if I can dig up a link.

[Skunkabilly]

I think it was on the Rainbow Six or Ghost Recon boards. It was a M9 vs M1911 thread, but with gamers instead of 1911 and Beretta cultists.

[Billmanweh]

Read this earlier this week, the poster was claiming to have seen the following happen;


"Draw a revolver.
Shoot six shots at a man-sized target 21 feet away.
Reload.
Fire six more shots at the same target.
Hit the target 12 times.

In 1.2 seconds.

This is 600 rounds/minute!"


:rolleyes:

[Thumper]

Actually, Bill, it took Jerry 2.99 seconds to do that.

http://www.smith-wesson.com/Products/Firearms/pc/records.htm

[TXBera]

Some of ya'll can recognize where this little doozy came from...:rolleyes:

and lets not even consider what would happen if they had a chance to fire my Mauser.

"no, hold the stock an inch away FROM your shoulder, to reduce recoil."

[BluesBear]

Mopar Mike,

We know about that top secret .17 cal turret gun and of course, ot doesn't use a necked down case.

It uses a SABOT ! :neener:

[HankB]

Actually, Bill, it took Jerry 2.99 seconds to do that.When I saw a video of Jerry M. doing this, the time "only" included the interval from the first shot to the last shot - no draw.

It takes me a "little" longer to do the same. ;)

[Gandalf]

ANYTHING written by DScottHewitt, the original windbag...

[eatatjoes]

running around and firing desert eagles in each hand is a legitimate tactic and is taught to israeli special forces.

[Hatchett]

I remember on another board, not a gunboard, thank god, where someone was talking about the Desert Eagle. He told us a cheerful story of how he was walking down an alley one night with his girlfriend and three thugs jumped out, one grabbing his girlfriend and putting a knife to her neck. He responded by drawing his ".44 Desert Eagle" from under his coat and shooting the thug in the exposed shoulder, throwing him backward, sliding him across the road, and knocking the knife out of his hand. He dealt with the other two thugs by shooting them in the chest, throwing them backward into walls, but "not shooting at any organs so they survived and ran away," while he reloaded and slipped the ".44 Desert Eagle" back under his coat.

A few guys praised him.

I and three others told him that that was the biggest load of crap we had ever heard.

Everybody laughed at him and he didn't reply back.

[Cosmoline]

This thread is even funnier. It turns out that many of my new "tactical" pals are antis! I find something ironic about a kid with a sniper avatar who has never even fired a gun trying to preach to me that firearms and the NRA are evil! I'm starting to lose my patience with them.

[P95Carry]

Cosmo ........ OMG!! I made it all the way down but reached close to ''cerebral shut-off''!! I applaud you for your rational tenacity but - I fear - the ''Raptors'' of this world are beyond saving.

A very strange assortment of ''minds''?? :rolleyes: .... in that place ...... sanity preserved only by the ''Cosmo'' factor.

[Hatchett]

"No, the NRA was not at fault...but guns...really do somthing to the human mind,"

This from a guy who spends his time talking on a message board dedicated to talking about firearms? That's a wierd board, Cosmo.

[George Hill]

If Glock made a .454... would you fire it?
Me? Sorry... I wouldn't even test fire that thing. I've broken my hand/wrist before. Aint worth it.
Wasn't that the same kid that was talking about firing lathed slugs made out of tungstin or alumininum or something else silly?

Actually, my personal favorites was the comments from PlusP about how you really don't need handgun training and practice is a waste of time and money and all you need is his finger shelf for the side of your gun so you could pull the trigger faster with your middle finger.

[mtnbkr]

I poked around that board a bit. Seems to be a lot of "snipers" and "operators" there. How many are older than 15?


Chris

[Checkman]

What I like is the fact that so many of the posters have "pictures" of themselves, but they all consist of personel wearing masks, helmets with visors etc. I had no idea that all the special operation personel in the entire world have their own forum.:what:

[Cosmoline]

It is indeed an odd board. As far as I can tell 90% of the posters are gun fans from other parts of the world. I'm interested in seeing how they view things.

Most of these kids are from the "Janes Tactical" school of firearms. They are absolutely fascinated with the latest H&K G-whatzit but don't have any knowledge of real firearms.

[Jonesy9]

Glocks all kabbom, .45 is the best round ever made

[Sam1380]

Girl in the bar trying to pick me up. "I'm an undercover secret agent."

[Billmanweh]

Girl in the bar trying to pick me up. "I'm an undercover secret agent."


Pics?

:rolleyes:

[berettaman]

I think I read it on the old TFL,some guy was having a real bad day on duty. It seemed that when his cruiser was hit by some RPG's and caught fire or something that his Glock melted,but that was ok because he had his Beretta as a back up,but the slide flew off and penetrated his forehead.He wasn't detoured by that and went with some kind of Black Tactical 2X4 with titanium nails.:neener: :evil: :evil: :evil:


(I think we all know who I'm thinking of)!!

[BluesBear]

"I'm an undercover secret agent."
Wearing the Official Secret Agent Uniform kinda ruins the secret part doesn't it? :rolleyes:

[cracked butt]

Not really a humorous one, but there's nothing like a cowboy reloader to stand my hair on end. I just happened to run across this today.

http://battlerifles.com/viewtopic.php?t=20753

[BluesBear]

WOW Cracked! That guy is an IDIOT.

I sure hope they have some extra life jackets at the shallow end of the gene pool.

[P95Carry]

Cracked Butt ........ this pic .....

http://www.thehighroad.org/attachment.php?s=&postid=49766

is one of OURS here!!!! Look at the properties. I seemed to remember seeing it before... but forget who posted it originally.

Now - is it possible that that poster is having a ball windin everyone up ... I mean .... loading UP until the bolt sticks! And he says .. I have overloaded .223, .243, 25acp, 257 Roberts AI, 32acp, 32sw,
32S&WLong, 32-20, 7.62x25mm, 7.62x54R, 8x57mm, 9x19mm, 9x23mm, 357 Sig, 38 sp, 357 mag, 38sw, 40sw, 10mm, 10.4mm, 45acp, 45Colt, 452/70, .410, and 45/70. Well ...... is this a guy with a death wish .... or just havin a loada fun at the expense of others? :p

[Navy joe]

Actually Clark is a member of this board too, and I don't think idiot is the label for him. He is a very smart reloader, it just seems that destructive testing of reloads is what floats his boat, he likes to know how, why, and when guns and loads fail. He seems to have safety procedures such as remote firing in place. I personally find the "after" photos he posts entertaining and instructional. However, it would have been better in that thread had he posted a warning to the newbie that his methods ain't exactly SAAMI. Come to think of it, he needs a "Do not try this at home" sig line :D

[P95Carry]

Oops! Oh, sorry Clark .. my bad (embarrassment!) ............... hell .. that is pretty, hmmm .... extreme!!! No wonder I recognized the pic but had forgot the originator.

Well ... yeah, guess it would be wise to add on that stuff ....... ''not a recommendation''!:p

I must remember ... (thinks) .. do NOT buy a used firearm from Clark!

Sorry bud .... :o

[Standing Wolf]

My faith in humanity is restored.

[cracked butt]

He no doubt knows what he is doing, loading up to 100,000 psi without getting bitten. I keep thinking that that thin bit of brass that makes up the cartridge case is my friend, not something one should purposely try to destroy.:eek:

BTW, Brimic is a member of TFL also;)

[vertigo7]

A snippet of a caliber-wars story I've seen around a few boards:

Obviously more proof that a 9mm or 40sw has no knock down power. Looks like he walked to the phone. Had that been a .45 it would have blown his arms off, drank all your beer, gone through 5 walls and killed all your next door neighbors pets.

[Matt G]

P95Carry--

That's why I'm not posting my list of bigger whoppers that I've seen; too many folks around here to take offense! :)

[JohnKSa]

A guy on AssaultWeb tried to convince everyone that if the trigger return spring on a Beretta 92 broke the trigger pin and trigger could fall out because it had happened to him during a match.

After I called him on it (there are a couple of reasons why it's impossible for the trigger to fall out of a Beretta 92), he posted some involved story about how he found out later that his gun had been modified by a previous owner so that it was actually possible in his case.

Problem was, his posts made it clear he still had no clue how a Beretta went together--kept talking about the slide stop spring and the trigger return spring like they were the same thing. The odd thing is that he could have easily found out the truth by field-stripping the Beretta he claimed to own.

He also posted a gem about how he could never figure out how to replace a broken trigger spring and had to return the gun to the factory to have it fixed!!!

I still don't know exactly what to think about it...

He still posts as a regular on both AssaultWeb and the Beretta Forum.

[Joe Demko]

berettaman,

Do you mean this thread? (http://www.thefiringline.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=88272)

Frankly, it does contain some of my best work.:evil:

[cracked butt]

I just read that thread. I laughed so hard it hurt:D

[rangerbill]

was braging about being a firearms instructor at a state training academy. an academy that i have attended as a student on and off for the past twenty of it's 21 year history. he claimed to have personally fired every weapon the department owned state wide and trained the tactical teams for this department.

i kinda thought i knew the guy and posted saying so and commended him on doing such a good job. BUT to test him and/or to let him know i was ligit i posted a string of last names. 6 or 8.

any way this dude posts back accepting the compliment and stateing he wasn't none of those people he taught there BEFORE THEM.

the punch line is that string of names were the names of the 70 year old buildings on the academy campus. anyone thats ever been there would know that. well i never corrected him, him being a mod and all, didn't want to stir the muck ya know.

[zahc]

"Concrete piercing M-16 bullets that can sever a human being's limbs."

5.56 should be able t penetrate concrete, a little bit. I'm sure it'd penetrate a concrete block to some extent. And a skinny person getting hit through both bones in his/her wrist might very well have a limb severed....

[eatatjoes]

"semiautomatic assault rifles"

:rolleyes:

[Master Blaster]

My favs, are the posts I read claiming the Kerry, or Dean are in favor of civilian gun ownership, and support the RKBA>

[P95Carry]

In the end, I shot him 30 times in the heart/lungs and 15 times in the head. I was using a mixture of 147 grain subsonics, Winchester Silver Tips, and Glasers as I hadn't yet settled on a duty load. Golgo ..............

http://www.bedford.net/design/images/smilies/lol.gif

...... you excelled yourself.!

Lawdog files??? .... I think the ''Golgo Files'' are a distinct possibility!!

[sturmruger]

I have been a member of Packing.org (http://www.packing.org) for about three years. A couple of years ago there was a user who called himself Capt Blood . he came up with some of the most wild storied. He kept talking about how he had been followed by some gang bangers, he pulled in front of their car and "racked the slide" and then pointed his gun at them because they were following him. He made the mistake of spouting off about a bunch of very not kosher things he did with his gun. The guy used his work email as his listed email address. We found out he worked as a security office at a State College in TN!!! Kind of scary.


I felt bad for him because he thought we would all get off on his unsafe, borderline illegal actions. He should have read all the posts on Packing to realize that is not the mood on that board. I think he might have even lost his job. Does anyone else remember this guy??

EDIT found post

Link to Captain's bosses post (http://www.packing.org/news/article.jsp/6837/)
The guy did loose his job.

[SodaPop]

Everything "Pretty Boy" at TFL ever posted. He was a Navy SEEL at one time.:rolleyes: He shot bullets that could desolve in human flesh.

[Cosmoline]

DId anyone mention the Mall Ninja thread yet?

[Silent Bob]

I can't believe that anyone here hasn't mentioned the infamous dw 35 from Glock Talk and his wild yarns of Glock invincibility! Read more here:

A story about a hamster, a foundry and a Glock 22 (http://www.glocktalk.com/showthread.php?threadid=132397&highlight=Hamster)

[Unisaw]

10,000 lb. wheel weights for a 747? I hope those planes have a very, very long runway! This is too funny!

[goon]

I don't have any favorite in particular, I just find the guys who pretend to be veterans when they have no idea what they are talking about to be amusing.
I was only in for a year and a half, so I usually let it to some retired E-8 or something to correct them.
I haven't earned that honor.;)

[LeonCarr]

Double Mustard Whopper w/cheese, no onions :).

Just my .02,
LeonCarr

P.S. That, and the guy that said he killed a whitetail buck, one shot one kill, off hand, at 850 yards, with an open sight Mauser 98 8mm rifle. I asked him if he would come to West Texas and duplicate the shot on a range at a paper target, and he refused :).

[Barbara]

The mall ninja. Someone sent me the link to whichever board it was on at the time and I laughed so hard I cried.

Unrelated to guns, there was another one I was sent from (I think) jeep forums about a guy and his adventures with rhinoliner.

[Navy joe]

For those that missed the tacticla electric powered mall bus the first time, some fella out there preserved the Mall ninja thread from GT for posterity.
Here ya go.

about:blank

http://www.geocities.com/suketh.geo/gun/mall_ninja_1.html

[Ant Mod]

actually heard someone say that on a History channel special. The speaker was a guy at the Army ordnance museum - can't recall his name.

I remember him saying that. He was deferring ot the fact that they do this when they hit the body and thats why they are just as effective as the .308. Thus the army switched.

[berettaman]

Goglo-13
You my friend are the King of the GunBoard Woppers!
:D :D :D

[mtnbkr]

P.S. That, and the guy that said he killed a whitetail buck, one shot one kill, off hand, at 850 yards, with an open sight Mauser 98 8mm rifle. I asked him if he would come to West Texas and duplicate the shot on a range at a paper target, and he refused .

Ooh ooh, you reminded me of a fellow that sometimes shows up at hunting camp. He claims to have shot a whitetail deer at 800yds in the Eastern US mountains (where a 200yd shot is rare due to the terrain and brush). He did it with a .270, so he claims. Said the bullet was against the skin on the other side.

That's the biggest whopper I've had told to me personally.

Chris

[Prodigalshooter]

Cosmoline, that board you posted a link to is a little scary. You just can't argue with the "logic" of teens who know everything, so secure in their views. It was funny to notice how easy they get angry, that is usually the first sign the poster is pretty young.
I have to admire your tenacity, the guy repeatedly calling the NRA convention a "rally" and then defending the use of the word, is clearly
too busy talking to listen.

[son of a gun]

This is a good one:rolleyes:





asianthug
Group: Veteran Member
Posts: 2,164
Member No.: 815
Joined: 5-August 03



hey folks,

some of you know that i got my own range now. just the other day i went over there to target shoot my .22 rifle. it has been over 2 weeks since i visited my land and over 3 weeks since i fired any gun due to work. when i was at the range, i saw someone was using the range by himself. i didn't recognize him and i never got a call from anyone saying that they will be over. i don't charge people money to use the range, but i expect a call in advance to ask my permission. i make exceptions for cops and pow, but i still have to know who they are by name and stuffs. anyway, i drove my suv up to the shooting line and this dude turn around and saw my vehicle coming. his face went white as a christmas snow and he turned tail and accelarated his truck out of there faster than jeff gordon on race day. i hope i didn't scare him because i was just going to ask him who he contacted prior to shooting on my land. anyway, he left all his guns and gears behind. there are 3 glock handguns, an chinese preban ak47, an 30-30 lever gun, and a lot of ammo. i called the local cops to come and wait with me for the guy to come back so i can give him back his stuff without him trying to shoot me or something. we waited for 2 hours and noone came back. i asked the cops what i should do with all the stuffs and they said i can keep it if i don't file the report of trespassing. however, if i file a report then the stuffs will be taken for evidents and be destroyed after the crime is solved or after a certain period of time of unsolved result. i chose not to file a report and loaded all the stuffs in the back of my suv. i left a note at the benchrest stating that i'll be glad to give everything back if he comes and verify them and explain why he was there and why he ran.

it has been a over a week and i got no contact regarding these guns. the ak47 turns out to be a legal preban. it was verified by the gunshop. i am now in the process of registering it because the local district court found no link between it and any crime in the tri-state areas.

should i sell this ak47 or keep it. it is in excellence condition everwhere, but te rifling has seen good usage. i am keeping the 3 glocks for sure. i don't know what i am doing with the lever gun. is it my jackpot? has anyone has this happened to them.


--------------------



http://www.hk94.com/hk/index.php?showtopic=1665

[BluesBear]

And yet they say that kids today have no imagination. :rolleyes:



BTW on above story, Flesch-Kincaid Grade Level 5.9

[BluesBear]

Just found this one. Posted just a short while ago. :rolleyes:

This is the truth

Ejected brass create mini K-Boom

While I was emptying a magazine at the range, I hear a sound behind me and to the right. It sounded like a small firecracker going off. I figured it was an echo and shot the remaining rounds in the clip.

I turn to the table (behind me and to the right) to reload my clip, and my open ammo box is blown in half, with rounds scattered on the table and ground.

A nice round 45 hole in the bottom of the box, and no hole in the wooden table.

A hot, ejected case actually set off a round in the ammo box, by landing on the primer ! That case must have shot up in the air like a rocket.
:scrutiny: Oh Puulleeeezze.

[tommytrauma]

There's a yahoo posting on ar15.com under the name of ten_reb. I'm still not sure if he's purely full of crap, or if one of the board members is using an alter ego to pull peoples legs, but the posts are hysterical. An example:

first off dad was not a CIA sniper.... His MOS in Vietnam was a door gunnner on a chopper when he got back to the states then he be came a sniper in a long range ranger partol then when he screwed up his ankle he became the instructor ,,, he was taughtin snipering with m60 in nam from a CIA sniper called Smith, only name they would let the guys know him as... my statements on here are all true just you guys gettting the screwed up and turned around. the docunmentations on his train are in his personal file which i have read his copy of of them.
tommy i am not self taught swordsman i have learned basics from others but taught myself the rest. 16 hours day working is not that hard try 19 buildin and installin cabinets then come off that job unloading trucks ,,, told ya'll where i am like i said i working to get rn lic and with teaching JKD (jeet kun do) for those who ain't man enough to used your hands, having a girl friend and to many other friends around here to spend time with i can think of something better to do then to have to prove myself to bunch of guys who think you know everything.
hell my momma could shoot better than ya'll. personal i don't care if you think i can or can not do what i have said on here and it really does not matter what ya'll think to me cause there are two things in life that ya'll gotta learn that i already have. that imma let ya'll figure out.
Friends and Family here in Winchester know my talent for shoot and fatal combat as well as cripplin ability. I ain't a betting man ,, like i said before i putting my money to better just RN lic and girlfriend but ya wanna bet that a woman shooter 20 years military can shoot a bottle rocket out of the air ya can bet my momma but right now my kid girlfriend and school are more important.

In other posts, he describes his incredable martial arts experience, his use of a sword as a defense against bears, his ability to lift a pickup truck, etc. He's killing me!

[Jick42]

Over on Snipersparadise, this kid claimed that he or one of his buddies once put 14 shots all in the same hole from a Mini-14, LOL............

[Mike Irwin]

one of my favorites...

"This thread is arbitrarily closed at the whim of the General Discussion moderators, who have jointly decided to raise the signal-to-noise ratio on the forum. Please feel free to help out by posting a few serious threads now."

:evil:



Tommytrauma,

You know, the writing style on that bit that you posted is VERY similar to that of the individual who wrote the Mall Ninja thread...

[tommytrauma]

Tommytrauma,

You know, the writing style on that bit that you posted is VERY similar to that of the individual who wrote the Mall Ninja thread...

Yeah, the only thing thats keeping me from being completely sure it's a parody is some of the "serious" advice he offers such as working out in order to reduce a shoulder dislocation.

Either way, it's great material.


the best shot with a rifle don't need every possible thing ya can get for the rifle,,, just know your rifle inside and out and practice your shooting skills and you and hit any target...
I started out learnin how to shoot with a flintlock muzzle loader and now i can hit a bird in flight with it at 300 yards with right bullet and the right amount of powder now i have got my skills to where i can pick up any rifle any handgun and with first shot i can hit the target dead on just know the weapons and ammo you have ,,, first thing is learn the weapon and how the bullet drops after every shot

[longtom4570]

Best one i've heard was that the S&W 500 was the weapon of choice for gang members every where:what:

[Moparmike]

Mike Irwin, the sad part is that one you most recently posted isnt some joke.

My crystal ball sees alot of similar and mundane and boring posts being posted by new and old members alike, and then most being shut down with the explanation of "the information you are looking for can be found in the archives. Please use the search button to find your requested info.'' I see the livelyness being taken out of The High Road. Taking The High Road doesnt mean posts that are bereft of livelyness and excitement, as well as bereft of a little goofy humor now and then.

My crystal ball also sees this thread being shut down with the explanation being the quote you posted Mr. Irwin.

Like I said in the Tech Support forum, I really liked it here before.:(

[BluesBear]

I started out learnin how to shoot with a flintlock muzzle loader and now i can hit a bird in flight with it at 300 yards Ladies & Gentlemen...

WE HAVE A WINNER !

[Balog]

I wonder how big a bird that is? Must be one of them Kentucky rifles.

[BluesBear]

I was born & raised in Kentucky and there ain't nobody there that can do that.

[Balog]

Ah c'mon, I done heered about them thar Kaintucky raifles. Why, my Uncle Cleetus was a tellin' me that during the Revolution, them boys was a-shootin them Redcoats at over a mile! An he'd know, to. He's the smarterest one in me whole family, what wif his GED an all. Ain't none o' the raist uh us ever done got none o' that higher edumacation afore.

[444]

That thread with Golgo-13 on TFL was very good; I had forgotten about it. But that mall ninja thread was hilarious. I was roaring with laughter while my dog laid here staring at me. The replies were funnier than the original posts. "If Plan A is to take .308 rounds in the back, you should work on a plan B (or something to that effect). "If you get multiple perps you can put them on the choo choo train and take them to mall jail". :D :D :D

[Don Galt]

I don't believe anyone who says they are "ex-special forces" (and why do they always claim to be SEALs? No Rangers? Hmmm?)

I choose to believe that anyone who really was one would have enough self confidence to not need to appeal to that authority for whatever it is they are claiming.:rolleyes:

[Mike Irwin]

"I choose to believe that anyone who really was one would have enough self confidence to not need to appeal to that authority for whatever it is they are claiming."

Man have you said a mouthful of truth right there...

I lived next to my neighbor for over 3 years before his son told me that he was a decorated F-4 Phantom pilot in Vietnam with at least 1, and possibly 2, kills to his credit.

I worked for a guy in a gunshop for over a year before I saw a picture of him in his Green Beret get up. He was also in Vietnam, according to a good friend of his, very heavily into the thick of things for almost 5 years.

Neither of them said much about it even when directly questioned.

[Girlwithagun]

That "Mall Ninja" one cracked me up. I can just picture that guy up on the mall roof at Christmas time, making sure no one dips their hand into the Salvation Army collection bucket. :D

[Phil Ca]

Back in 1957, in Germany, some older guy in the unit was extolling the virtues of the .45 ACP. He claimed that one shot from a .45 took some guys arm, "clean off" with one shot. He did not see it himself and I think it was a hand-me-down story too.

This story has been handed down in my family. My great-grandfather was a hunter and used to sell meat in Denver from deer and elk he shot out on Cherry Creek. The meat sold for .08 cents a pound.

When he was hunting for camp meat in the Big Horn Basin in Wyoming he was on an elevation overlooking a watering hole when he saw a large buck drinking water. He fired a single shot and ended up with three deer. There was a doe and a fawn on the other side of the buck, and all fell to the single shot.

Of course I wasn mot there to witness it, but I know that all the men in my family were good shots and with the exception of me, they all shot meat for the table. Great-grandfather Frank was at one time known as the greatest rifle shot in the Rocky Mountains. He used to have contests in Denver with man named Gove, who was a gunsmith. They would set up a metal circle on a post and back off so many paces and shoot. After each shot, they would back off and shoot again, untill someone finally missed.

One day I was in Denver visiting our field office. I took an afternoon and went to the main library and spent several hours of research. I was getting weary and about to give up. I told myself I would look for 10 more minutes after a break to rest my eyes. When I sat down at the reader again I started scanning old papers and the first page was about him. He had collecterd some specimens for inclusion in a natural history display. I need to do some checking and see if any are still there.

:cool:

[Horsesense]

" I don't believe anyone who says they are "ex-special forces" (and why do they always claim to be SEALs? No Rangers? Hmmm?)
I choose to believe that anyone who really was one would have enough self confidence to not need to appeal to that authority for whatever it is they are claiming."



If you want to buts some big windbag go to http://www.phonyveterans.com/index.html

[JimJD]

One of my favorites that I still hear from time to time:

"When hollow point bullets come out of your body, the hole is the size of a watermelon!"

:scrutiny:

[Balog]

Don Galt: do you apply that standard to the THR members who are/claim to have been Spec Ops? I know of at least one member who claims to have been a SEAL.

[Don Galt]

Balog--

You trying to start a conflict?

I spent 20 years on military bases. I know enough to take anything said by military or ex-military with a grain of salt.

They're no better informed than the average member of the public on a lot of things, and far less likely to think independantly.

So yeah, any member of THR who claims to be a Seal in the process of trying to sway something to his or her point doesn't get any respect from me for that claim.

Either they weren't a seal or they are making the logical fallacy of appeal to authority.

[ninenot]

You don't have to be on the gunboards---

Best whopper of the last century: "Lee Harvey Oswald used a cheap Italian import rifle, aimed and fired 3 shots in 7.3 seconds, hit his target twice, while Oswald was aiming down and the target was both moving and accelerating."

Some versions of this whopper have LHO's bullets entering from the front of his victim, while LHO was behind the victim.

[ninenot]

ON this thread: "Girl in bar tries to pick me up."

Even better than the LHOswald stuff.

[ninenot]

Finally, in re: 5.56 "tumbling" inside the body: I first heard that from an ex-USMC doc who served with the 1stMarine mechanized in Vietnam.

Dunno how he knows about this because I don't know if he operated on VC victims of the 5.56.

[tex_n_cal]

I will have to vote for the guy who went by the tag of "Wild Romanian".

He stills owes me a date with one of those visiting wild girls from Romania:evil:

[SMLE]

This thread is so funny that I do hope the moderators will leave it alone. I haven't laughd so hard since I don't know when.
When I worked in a gun shop a few years back, a fellow was trying to sell us a beat up 1911 for about five times retail by claiming "This gun was present when Che Guevara was killed".

My other favorite is "The gooks could shoot our ammo in their Aks..."

[ElToro]

one word...

GunKid

I dont try to inflate myself too much becuase you may end up running into one of these fine folks in person. i had been corresponding via email and postings on another board and then we met face to face ata gun shop one day... good thing i hadnt said i was a 6-6 ripppling muscle bound ex seal/ranger/CIA-NSA-FBI whatever... he would have laughed so hard and passed out, I would have had to use my MD degree i earned at age 19 to save him :)

Thanks for the link to the national archives i do want to order records on my grandfather who died when my dad was only 14 and see if i can get his records on stuff he did in the USN in the 30's. i have his name, SSN and birthdate and approx dates of service. sposedly was a fleet champ boxer and had other exploits in the south china seas... although these are tales my dad was told when he was a kid so they may have been embellished.. all i have from him is a few firearms he owned..

[bad_dad_brad]

Used to be a guy on The Firingline that liked to tell tales, very opinionated fellow, and often I agreed with his opinions. He called himself the "Wild Romanian". Well he posted this whopper on THL that I thought was kinda funny. Needed polishing, but humorous nevertheless.

http://www.thefiringline.com/forums/showthread.php?threadid=72402

[Chris Rhines]

My two faves:

"Rights aren't absolute."
"You must be paranoid if you carry (some place where I don't carry...)"

- Chris

[MountainPeak]

Not funny like many of these posts, but I've read several over the years where CCW(claimed) holders are looking forward to having to defend themselves. I don't know if these guys are just pretending they are macho, think it makes them look brave, or are idiots. My guess is idiots.

[P95Carry]

I've read several over the years where CCW(claimed) holders are looking forward to having to defend themselves Hopefully just macho dreams .... and best kept that way!!:rolleyes: :p

[Horsesense]

A guy comes into the office last week and wants to "wax eloquent" with his knowledge of the JFK assignation. He proceeded to tell me about the entrance wound to the front of the head and exit wound in the back….I kept a strait face, and didn't miss a beat when I said " ah but most folks don’t know that the CIA loaded the bullet backwards, in the casing, to create confusion" a guy that works with me piped in and said "it’s true, I seen it on the internet"….the guy bought it, hook line and sinker!

[elkhunter]

I was out deer hunting this fall and had a guy tell me that a .44 mag will "glance" right off the skull of a grizzly bear. :banghead:
Said he was out hunting in Colorado in bear country and decided the .44 wasn't enough and bought the .454 Cassull. Must have been hunting in country with the new genetic strain of super bears that have ceramic plating for a skull. :evil:

[illuminatus99]

it wasn't on a message board but this guy told me he owns a suppressed HK-Mk23, which isn't illegal but it's quite expensive, the thing that made me laugh at him though was that he claimed he was a government contractor and that it was issued to him and that he had a special government permit to carry a suppressor.

[Newton]

How about:

"Gun crime in Britain would be reduced if more people over there had guns".

That always gets me rolling.

[BluesBear]

"Gun crime in Britain would be reduced if more people over there had guns". Why not? It works here.

[Newton]

Britain 68 firearm related deaths per year.

USA just under 12,000.


You're trying to tell me that flooding Britain with legally owned firearms would REDUCE their total to what, say 67 :rolleyes:

Come on, I like guns as much as the next Montana compound dweller, but we have to show that we are capable of rational thought.

[macman37]

I find that gunboards may have some doozies on them but when you get people together in person the whoppers come out just as they always have...

I had a guy at a Dunhams insist that his dad and uncle were taking out VC with headshots at a mile using their M16s... and that they were WAY more powerful than the rifles the Cong were using. And when I kind of laughed him off (and his coworker told me he'd been trying to talk the guy out of it for a while) he got more insistent that his dad and uncle were right. He even grabbed a loaded .223 round and put it on the counter with this smug expression as if I would be completely convinced just by this action...

I had to laugh.

-M

[BluesBear]

The things some people will fall for. :rolleyes:

http://www.smith-wessonforum.com/ubb/Forum21/HTML/005721.html

Maybe he can trade it for one of Hitler's bunker guns?

[Weimadog]

Maybe he can trade it for one of Hitler's bunker guns?
No, he can't. I own both of them.



Weimadog

[ny32182]

Britain 68 firearm related deaths per year.

USA just under 12,000.



The USA has over 30,000 per year, and I'd bet a million to one that Britain has WAY more than 68.

Britain's violent crime has been going straight through the roof ever since they enacted their gun bans. Now they are even banning toy guns trying to stop their surge of violence. The only question in Britain now is, what are they going to ban next?

Britain stands as a perfect example of exactly what would happen in this country if the Dems get their way.

[roscoe]

Elkhunter,

I don't know specifically about grizzly skulls, but bullets will glance off an (African) lion skull because of the shape of the skull. I would be willing to bet that a .44 mag shot that hits any part of the zygomatic, maxilla, or frontal bone from directly in front would hit at a pretty obtuse angle and bounce off. In the snout, mouth, or eye socket or something, the round would plow right in, but much of the skulls of big carnivores are angled steeply back, and the bone is pretty thick to resist the strain on the teeth while chewing through the bones of prey:

http://www.sculpturegallery.com/sculpture/grizzly_bear_skull.html

I wouldn't aim at a grizzly's head, anyway. The wound might kill the bear eventually, but I probably wouldn't be around to derive any satisfaction from it.

[444]

BluesBear
That link isn't working for me: it sounds good though

[BluesBear]

444

Looks like it's been pulled.
It was on the S&W forum. Some guy had a S&W model 61 Escort pistol for sale. He was saying it belonged to David Klorish, he even called him the Wacko from Waco, and was purchased from David Klorish Sr. :rolleyes: Even came with a business card from Mr. Klorish Sr's gospel music store in California.
He was asking WAYYyyyy too much money for this littlepiece of history.

He seemed to be unaware of the fact that the real wacko, David Koresh, was born with a different name and never knew his father.

Now the ad has disappeared but he has a new ad posted selling all of the accesories from the gun, but not the gun itself.

I guess I threw a little Seattle rain on his Tennessee parade? :neener:

I wish I has saved his ad.

[Billmanweh]

The USA has over 30,000 per year, and I'd bet a million to one that Britain has WAY more than 68.


the cdc figures from 2000 are 28,663 firearms deaths in the U.S. (10,801 assault/homicides, the rest are accidents, suicides, etc)

I've seen the figure quoted of 97 firearms deaths in England for 2001. I don't know if I'd say 97 is WAY more than 68, but anyhow...

:D

[StuporDave]

the cdc figures from 2000 are 28,663 firearms deaths in the U.S. (10,801 assault/homicides, the rest are accidents, suicides, etc) I've seen the figure quoted of 97 firearms deaths in England for 2001. I don't know if I'd say 97 is WAY more than 68, but anyhow...

I'd bet those numbers wouldn't be nearly as dramatic if looked at on a per-capita basis. There's a lot more people here than there.

Dave

[P95Carry]

There's a lot more people here than there. Actually Dave ... in approx terms .... that tiny lil island is crowded up with about 1/5 of our figure. Call it 60 mil ..... and ours 300 mil!

I seriously think tho their methods of recording and displaying stats is most unreliable ..... there are maybe many gun related deaths within the ''gangsta'' community that prolly never hit the record books. Other thing too ..... I think there is a sorta ''Russian'' factor too ... whereby in the absence of gun's availability - homicides with ''other'' weapons are way up .. knives, blunt objects etc ..... so in fact actual homicide figures, across the board, would probably mean more. I mean .. a death is a death is a death!

That tho is somewhat academic when considering those poor serf's inability to do much at all to defend themselves, without gettin arrested!:(

[Billmanweh]

I guess in terms of rate, the U.S. figure would have been 281,421,906/28,663 or 10.185 per 100,000.

If you say there are 59,000,000 people in Great Britain, you get a rate of .164 per 100,000.

Crazy, huh?

In 2000, the overall murder rate in the U.S. was about 5.5 per 100,000 and in Great Britain it's around 1.0 (this is from memory, so feel free to correct me if I'm off here).

[P95Carry]

Bill - I have no figures to hand .. and am too damn lazy right now to go look ............. but it would be of interest to factor in the Russian figures .... cos altho for most part ''gun-free'' homicides, I do believe the figures are higher than here ... sure I saw that somewhere. (I know the ubiquitous somewhere!! :rolleyes: )

Right now .. I do NOT find the UK figure holds much truth in fact ... can't prove that tho .... just the ''ole phart cynic'' thang!!:p

[mod12]

those brits never could shoot straight! :what:

[BluesBear]

Actually, the death rate of people who were shot by someone holding a firearm is not a gun board whopper since that tired old "argument" was not something created by someone in la-la land on a firearms forum.

Instead it's something created by someone in la-la land in the real world with a political aganda.

There's a BIIIGG difference between a gun-board whopper and an anti-gun whopper.

[Billmanweh]

yeah, I've read that the GB figures might be somewhat skewed because of how homicides are reported there, but I've never seen it presented as anything other than just an anecdotal observation. so who knows...

[Billmanweh]

but it would be of interest to factor in the Russian figures .... cos altho for most part ''gun-free'' homicides, I do believe the figures are higher than here

yeah, I can't find them handy either, but I think you're right. The Russian homicide rate is just insanely high, even comparing it to ours.

it still seems odd to me that our homicide rate would be so high compared to otherwise very similar places like canada, germany, great britain, italy, etc. maybe it is the video games??

[urbanden]

Not from a board, but from the campfire when the guns are put away and the whiskey comes out: "Had a .292 Zingthingy I built up oncet, never did know how fast she went, but she'd shoot plumm flat fer 6-700 yards, then she clumb a little...."

[ZeroX]

Not from a gun board but:

Just before we went to Afghanistan, this guy posted that he was worried about what would happen to our soldiers. He said that, because they'll burn tires when we come, the smoke will cause our helicopters to crash. Also, our Abrams tanks will be very vulnerable as our enemies drop grenades on top of them from windows above. That was a just the tip of the iceberg but I can't remember much else.

Turns out a lot of his opinions came from seeing Black Hawk Down one time and misinterpreting just about everything. :rolleyes:

[JohnKSa]

I've read that the GB figures might be somewhat skewed because of how homicides are reported there, but I've never seen it presented as anything other than just an anecdotal observation.Seem to recall reading that at one time in the not too distant past, a homicide in GB wasn't counted until there was an actual conviction. They may have changed that by now.

[mbs357]

Me and my uncle were having conversations about guns...
We got onto the subject of pistols and then good pistols.
He mentioned he wanted a 'Deagle' in .50AE for home defense.
I said "Well, that's seven rounds and I've heard that the .50s jam pretty badly."
He said, "But, dude, you only need one shot!"
I nearly cried.

[Mannlicher]

I like the 'cult' threads. You know, "My MilSurp Mosin shoots .25 MOA at 250 yards with the issue sights", or "My KelTec has fires 35,000 rounds with zero malfunctions".

[96Eunos]

"A guy comes into the office last week and wants to "wax eloquent" with his knowledge of the JFK assignation "

Which one? :)

[BigSlick]

Over and away by FAR, was the following declarations by a well known C3 dealer in the southwest, early in 2001 ...

Hell, screw getting an MP5... just by a 94 and a tie wrap - SAME THING. You do know all transferrables are going to be outlawed within two years anyway. I am the guy the gov't calls when they want advice about how to outfit the black ops and HRT's on the parkway. I teach the guys at HK, how their weapons work *and* how they should work. HK turns out crap, but with enough of my time, they can finally get a somewhat functional piece in production.

Oh yeah, the SP89 is the same thing as the MP5, but buy the 94 instead and put a tie wrap across the disconnector if you want to shoot FA. The REAL buy on the street right now is the Sig551, I have four of the 10 ever legally imported, all sequential serial numbers. If I wasn't connected so well I would have never gotten them.

Don't believe all the BS you hear from internet idiots man, I am your best chance for getting a correct weapon, unless I decide I don't like you and trust me man, you don't want ME as an enemy..... yada yada yada... I'm superman... I'm invisible... I talk to dead people... I was in 'nam with Carlos Hathcock, I spotted for him for five years in the bush...

No kidding, this guy is a Class III/SOT

I have heard a few wild ones on the 'net boards, but trust me... there's NOTHING that comes close to this guy..

BigSlick

[bogie]

A fellow a few years back... Oh, probably at least 10 years ago... on WWIVnet (sort of coexisting bulletin board system with Usenet's rec.guns) claimed that the round nose lead bullet was the absolute best for the .45 long colt.

When extensive pressed, he backed it up by saying that it doesn't cause a lot of tissue damage, but has good penetration.

When pressed some more, it turned out that he liked to play fast draw cowboy, and had shot himself with a .45 long colt, but didn't think there'd been too many bad after affects.

Oh, and he'd done it TWICE.

[Black Majik]

Funniest thread I've read was the one on Glocktalk.

Some kid asks how to take scratch marks off of his slide. Apparantly, he was in the woods, had some matches and wanted to smoke a cigarette. Well... he used his Glock slide to light the matches so he could light his cig. The marks on his slide wouldn't come off... :D

I was rolling when I read that thread. Too bad they deleted that thread.

[jsalcedo]

The guy who told me he shoots .44 magnums out of his uncles WWI Colt 1917 revolver all day long.

[richyoung]

"it still seems odd to me that our homicide rate would be so high compared to otherwise very similar places like canada, germany, great britain, italy, etc. maybe it is the video games??"

The United States is host to a number of circumstances that unfortunately increase the number of violent incidents. Two long, mostly undefended borders - the southernmost of which is routinely penetrated illegaly by millions of people -some of whom want to harvest crops and wash dishes, and some of whom wish to ply their criminal trade on richer targets than they have back home. A bitter legacy of racial tension that eventually led to a bloddy civil war - a tension that still echos in our political and economic discourse. A war on drugs and a war on terrorism. Not to mention a uniquely American tendancy to take our anger out on others, as opposed to the more European method of doing one's self in.

[Cowgunner]

My manager says he was a Navy "Sniper" but not in the Seal Teams, deployed too Somolia in 2000, punched a Marine Colonel, shoot hundreds of people, is casonova, received the Bronze Star, and is better than any man who walked the earth........needless to say I'm not impressed.......

[ajkurp]

This fella walks into my country pawn/gunshop/c-store and asks for cigarettes. Said he just returned from a big construction job in Bend, OR. You know, "Keeping several crews at work." Looked at my pistols and said while in Bend, an old gun collector guy had died, leaving the gun safe to his grandson. Well, the construction tycoon bought the safe from the grandson for $55. Inside were 15 guns, including- hey! a Taurus .357 just like the one you have there! He then proceded to search his car in vain for 50 cents to finish paying for his cigarettes. I dug into my pocket just to get rid of him.

I love this job! :)

[Librarian]

The USA has over 30,000 per year, and I'd bet a million to one that Britain has WAY more than 68.

CDC WISQARS (http://webappa.cdc.gov/sasweb/ncipc/mortrate10_sy.html)

2002, United States Suicide Firearm Deaths and Rates per 100,000
All Races, Both Sexes, ICD-10 Codes: X72-X74

Number of Crude Age-Adjusted
Deaths Population Rate Rate**

17,108 287,974,001 5.94 5.91

2002, United States Homicide Firearm Deaths and Rates per 100,000
All Races, Both Sexes, ICD-10 Codes: X93-X95, *U01.4

Number of Crude Age-Adjusted
Deaths Population Rate Rate**

11,829 287,974,001 4.11 4.06

2002, United States Violence-Related Non-Firearm Deaths and Rates per 100,000
All Races, Both Sexes,
ICD-10 Codes: X60-X71, X75-X84,Y87.0, X85-X92, X96-Y09,Y87.1,Y35(.1-.9),Y89.0, *U01(.0-.3,.5-.9),*U02,*U03


Number of Crude Age-Adjusted
Deaths Population Rate Rate**

20,440 287,974,001 7.10 7.06

The British Home Office reports
There were 853 deaths initially recorded as homicide by the police in 2003/04.

There were 68 homicides involving firearms in 2003/04, 12 fewer (15%) than the previous year. Eight per cent of all homicides in 2003/04 involved firearms.

Statistics UK (http://www.statistics.gov.uk/census2001/pyramids/pages/64.asp) says there were 49,138,831 people counted in the 2001 census, giving about 1.7 reported murders per 100,000, about 0.14 firearms murders/100,000.

Note that the US non-firearm murder rate is more than 4 times the total England/Wales murder rate.

[DRZinn]

While I was emptying a magazine at the range, I hear a sound behind me and to the right. It sounded like a small firecracker going off. I figured it was an echo and shot the remaining rounds in the clip.

I turn to the table (behind me and to the right) to reload my clip, and my open ammo box is blown in half, with rounds scattered on the table and ground.

A nice round 45 hole in the bottom of the box, and no hole in the wooden table.

A hot, ejected case actually set off a round in the ammo box, by landing on the primer ! That case must have shot up in the air like a rocket.That might be possible. I saw a dropped 9mm case explode one time - the bullet rose about 3 feet; the case was peeled back.

Maybe if a casing hit just right....

[DSRUPTV]

My brother in law told me that he shot a deer on the run in the head at 450 yards across a field. This is coming from the a guy who brags about hunting on posted land and also out of season. Some people do more to hurt the image of hunters and gun owners than the antis.

[Elmer Snerd]

This thread (http://www.thehighroad.org/showthread.php?threadid=11039) started by dfariswheel.

.50 Caliber Rifles Can Shoot Down Satellites.

Violence Policy Center Claims .50 Caliber Rifles Can Shoot Down Satellites

The Violence Policy Center (VPC) released another new report calling for strict regulation on the .50 caliber rifle. The VPC's new report, "Hotter Than a Heat-Seeker, More Devastating Than a Death Ray", claims that .50 caliber rifles can shoot down U2 spy planes, damage military satellites, and may have played a role in the recent unexplained crash of the space shuttle Columbia.

"These are extremist weapons of nigh-inexplicable power," explained the VPC senior analyst Tom Diaz. "We've fabricated - er - found evidence that this extremist super-weapon, which is shockingly under-regulated, may have fallen into extremist terrorist hands and played a role in the tragic Cold War downing of U2 pilot Gary Powers. These extremist rifles can swat aircraft from the sky just like hunting birds, and pose a great risk for our unprotected International Space Station."

"Look, I'm really quite at a loss for how to deal with these ridiculous claims," began exasperated Fifty Caliber Rifle Association spokesman Johann Brett. "You cannot shoot down a large airplane, let alone a satellite, with any caliber rifle. In World War II, fighters equipped with many heavy machine guns and cannons put hundreds of rounds of incendiary ammunition into slow-flying bombers and they often still survived. No one has ever been killed by a criminal with a .50 caliber rifle. They cost thousands of dollars and weigh more than two bowling balls, but in the end they're just rifles, not super-weapons. And anyway you don't hunt birds with a rifle, you need a shotgun."

Diaz dismissed Brett's response as biased gun lobby propaganda. "These gun industry extremists have long hidden the truth about the extremist weapon's power," he insisted. "For example, there are indications that the asteroid belt was produced by a stray .50 caliber round from a gun extremist's rifle impacting on what was previously a perfectly bucolic and peaceful world. And we suspect that the planet Alderaan, Princess Leia's homeworld, disintegrated under the extremist wrath of an extremist's extreme .50 caliber bullet."

For his part, Brett described the VPC's claims as "lunacy". "The asteroid belt was not caused by the .50 caliber rifle," he insisted. "It took a moon-sized Death Star to destroy Alderaan, and anyway that was a movie, not real life."

"I can't understand why the press considers this constant stream of fantastic,concocted reports credible and prints them," Brett fired back. "The VPC is an anti-gun organization with a million-dollar annual budget from the Joyce Foundation, no actual academic researchers, and a tiny staff of propagandists. Why do you print this insanity?"

"Extremist extremist extremist extremist gun lobby extremist," countered Diaz. "Anyway, the New York Times prints anything we write, so it'll get printed." Diaz noted that the VPC has sponsored new bills to ban the .50 caliber rifle in numerous states. "This threat to public safety cannot go unchecked," Diaz asserted. "The .50 caliber rifle must be banned to reduce crime, or fight terrorism, or, you know, whatever."

Legislative battles involving the .50 caliber rifle are expected to continue throughout the next coming years.

from the Simon Jester project - bringing levity to the insanity!