[Holly76201]

have a big problem getting gun purchases approved by your wives?

My Dearly Beloved doesn't even ask me. He just brings in new guns, usu rifles, and sometimes I notice and sometimes I don't.

Of course money isn't an issue, usually. And as long as the bills are paid and we have some disposable income I don't have a problem with it. He makes more $ than I do, and he deserves to spend it as he sees fit. [as long as its not on wild women other than me, lol]

I know a lot of the comments here about wives being angry or begrudging gun purchases are tongue-in-cheek, but I hear some others that sound more serious.

Anyhoos, I was just wondering.

Holly

[sm]

...I'll throw in my expert opinion. :D

I believe finances are at the top of marriage problems if not in fact #1. I feel this is usually indicative of relationship problems moreso than the items the monies are spent on, in this case firearms.

When I was married She and I had our own accts, we also had a joint acct. for house, utilities, taxes, ins....etc. We had no problem if the other brought home a new firearm ,clothes, jlry or decorations for the new home.

ACTUALLY worked in favor of each other. She'd really want something for the new house, maybe she really wanted a new pc of jlry, anything personal, I either surprised her with it, or contributed funds to allow her to get it. She in turn surprised me, maybe she knew I wanted a certain firearm and had it on lay-a-way, she contributed to the lay-a way, paid it off, and all I had to do was pick it up. She has even just surprised me with it outright. Instead of 1# of powder, she'd put the 3# or 8# on the counter and just said "hush, get it and don't worry about it".

Granted we didn't want for much, she really didn't want much for herself, so I was really attentive when she did. Now she had a son...the joke was the kid cut into our play money... Firearms pale in comparison to Band/ Band trips and Drums...then came car ins...:uhoh: :D

I drew short straw on teaching the stepson how to drive...I'd rather look at paint swatches, furniture , take the Missus shopping...anything...just don't make me teach him...please! :p The boy could play drums, didn't know a steering wheel from a radio antenna. :uhoh:

[Hoploholic]

You mean you are supposed to ask? This throws a hole new light on the subject for me. ;)

[PAshooter]

Of course money isn't an issue, usually. And as long as the bills are paid and we have some disposable income I don't have a problem with it. He makes more $ than I do, and he deserves to spend it as he sees fit. [as long as its not on wild women other than me, lol]

You're a good woman, Holly - and you sound a lot like my wife. She's not really a "gun person" but knows that I enjoy them and so she supports my "hobby." So long as there's food on the table, a roof over our heads, and the bills are paid (my first priority as well) she's perfectly happy to let me indulge myself :D

Your husband's a lucky guy!

[The Reaper]

No problem here. My wife buys more expensive guns than I do.:D

Oh, but she does buy fewer of them so it pretty much evens out. ;)

[Lennyjoe]

Sometimes I have to back door the weapon to the gunsafe. After that Im pretty safe.

She did raise an eyebrow when I brought in the GPS though. That was only $200 bucks. :confused:

[keyhole]

Mine used to throw a fit about me buying more guns. Told me I had just two hands, and could hold that many. Told her that was why God created holsters, slings. Now I have too many for the safe, but she doesn't throw a fit anymore!:D

[Standing Wolf]

My former wife used to complain about the money I spent on guns.

[Okiecruffler]

The wife actually looked at me the other day and said, "You know what we need?" I had just been flipping through the channels and had stopped abit longer than I should have on a Victoria's Secret commercial, so I figured the answer was marrage counciling. But no, she has decided we need "one of those M16 looking rifles". And she didn't stop there, she thinks we need a red dot sight on it, or maybe a laser, but definately a good light. She told me to figure up how much everything she wanted on it would cost so she could work it into the budget. You just gotta love that woman.

[Dave R]

I discuss all firearms purchases with my wife. Trust is a beautiful thing...

We tend to agree on most things of this nature. I know when we can and when we can't.

[Dain Bramage]

Okay, my wife is a lot like Holly, and Mdshooter's response could have been my own...

...but, please. Okiecruffler's response must be like those Penthouse letters I used to read as a teenager; maybe true, but not happening on my planet! :D

If the story is true, his wife, she's Morgan Fairchild by the way, is a gem. Lock her up and have Sasquatch and the Loch Ness Monster guard the key!

[7.62FullMetalJacket]

I just take her along. I always get something I want, but she does have veto approval, not on price, but on usability. If she doesn't like it, or can't shoot it, then I can't have it.

However, I do not have veto power. I can only "advise and consent."

Fair trade:D

[OEF_VET]

The PITA formerly known as the wife used to give me a ration of crap every time I even mentioned a new gun. The only exception was when I reenlisted and got a bonus. After the bills and any household expenses were paid, we each took $1,000 for ourselves. She actually let me buy a couple guns without griping. Heck, she complained when I spent $50 to buy a Lorcin .22, for a cheap plinking gun.

Now, my fiance on the other hand, is a totally different story. She's got the right attitude. As long as the bills get paid, if I want to spend some money on guns, ammo, reloading supplies, etc., then so be it. Ya gotta love the woman. In fact, my Christmas present last year turned out to be a SAR-1. Heck, she even goes to the gunshows with me when she has the time.

Frank

[Mike Irwin]

What wife?

My dogs don't care, though, as long as they have kibble...

[Okiecruffler]

"...but, please. Okiecruffler's response must be like those Penthouse letters I used to read as a teenager; maybe true, but not happening on my planet!"

When I asked her what she wanted for christmas, she said a tennis bracelet, and a 357 snubby with laser grips. All I can say gentlemen is marry well and remember you are unworthy.:neener:

[rayjay]

I collect guns and my wife collects cats. I open my mouth about the cats and she points at the gun safe.....my mouth shuts.

[Greg L]

I just point out that the BBT driver (Dave, we've become quite familiar since the C&R :D ) is dropping things off in sets of three & point out the gang of three roaring around the house and mumble something about inheritance... ;) .

(actually any long gun that comes into the house she either ignores or does one of these :rolleyes: . If a pistol shows up and is smaller than a 6" 686 I usually hear "Oooh pretty" and never get to see it again :eek: :D ).

Greg

[Rembrandt]

....marriage is full of compromises, I don't meddle concerning Avon, Tupperware, or other nick-naks....and she pretty much feels the same way concerning firearms. Money is not an issue.

....easiest way to buy guns was to tell her they were for our boys to hunt with....what Mother would want to deprive her children of quality time with their Dad?....of course now that the kids are grown and gone, I'll have to extend that same point to the grandkids...:p

[DeputyVaughn]

I just let Mrs. DeputyVaughn read this thread and she is, of course, interested in my reply. She is definitely the fly in the ointment when it comes to my gun purchases. I walked out of a gun show with an M-1 Carbine slung over my shoulder once and she didn't speak tome for 3 days. She knew I was looking for one when I went in but I was suppose to discuss it with her before finalizing the deal. She didn't show up by 1645 and I made the decision without her. Lesson learned: Don't by without discussion first.

Yesterday, I was at the gunshow in Huntsville. I found a Cetme .308 Sporter that really had my attention. I negociated a deal that would have cost me my Compact Witness 45acp and some cash. (I love that Witness too) I was on the verge of doing it, or at least giving it a lot of thought, when my cell phone rang. (Reminder to self: Turn off cell phone in gunshow.) It was my better half. She must have sensed what I was thinking. When I told her about the deal she didn't like it. Trading the Witness was OK but the cash....... Anyway, needless to say I still have my Witness. I will also be able to get the kids something for Christmas without straining the budget as much.

Real point here is.......my wife is much more frugal than I. I'm the one more likely to impulse buy. I need her to temper my judgment. Although the Cetme was a good deal it would have definitely strained the budget to get it. On my salary even a small miscalculation can be major problem. I also must point out that this is the same woman that approved the purchase of a Bushmaster AR-15 in July and didn't fuss when I bought my issued Sig 226 last month when the department bought us new guns. She figures 2 guns in one year is enough. She's a very wise lady....... just no fun at a gun show.

I guess this is what a working marriage is really all about. A little give and take and a lot of understanding of the others point of view. I certainly respect and rely on Wanda's in many of my decisions (she'll be reading this so I'd better say that). She often can see something I can't or has a different take on it. It sure takes the fun out of gunshows though.

Scott

[TallPine]

She buys books, I buy guns.

[Jack19]

My wife used to opine about purchases.....now she just rolls her eyes. lol

[W Turner]

Like someone else here said, my wife is a lot more frugal than I am. We work together on my purchases, I have a copy of my "list" on my safe and as long as it is on the list, and we can squeeze it in financially, she is ok with it.

I am more of an imulse buyer, but I have gotten a lot better since I first got into guns. I used to trade constantly and it is because of that that I have to be more careful now...:banghead:

The good thing is that if I come to her and say I absolutely must have -this- gun for whatever reason, she is usually accomodating as long as it is not prohibitively expensive ($600+).

Mino

[Smoke]

WIfe has money she can spend with no questions asked.
I have money I can spend with no questions asked.

Guns come out of this fund.

If I dip into another fund (or she does..) questions get asked.

"well honey...I just figured we'd be safer with another 870 instead of 5 smoke detectors; the dog will wake us up if he smells smoke.....":D :p :neener:

[ksnecktieman]

I had two wives, as long as finances were not strained they did not complain. Security of them bothered the first one a lot, because we were raising three kids, and she was and still is antigun. I KNOW I have to vote in every election just to cancel out her vote.

I am single and have been for many years now, and one of the first things I share with a new woman is shooting. If she likes it or is neutral to it, it is a good foundation to start from. I have only stopped dating two because of their anti-gun opinions. I am too old to change my ways, and any woman old enough for me probably is too.

[Atticus]

I quit buying guns years ago. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
My wife did suprise me the other day when she suggested that I buy a REAL gun safe....so now the search is on before she recants.

[mod12]

my wedding present almost 34 years ago was an skb 200e dbl. bbl. [ithaca] shotgun. she's often said that it was her first mistake. the second was something about saying i do. that's her story and she's sticking to it. still have both of them and they're in pretty good shape.;)

[Mute]

I have found that it is indeed easier to ask for forgiveness than permission.

[Mauserlady]

I'm definitely not a guy but can still give my .02 right??? :D

David and I (like someone else that already posted) have a "household account" that we each put money into every payday. We also have our seperate accounts and that money is ours to do with whatever we want... He wants a new gun and can afford it I say go for it... And he's the same way with me on anything I want to purchase...

I may tease him a little about certain purchases/trades (OK there's one that he sold that I'm still not happy about) but that's all it really is...

[Archie]

was when I didn't tell her I bought one.

She wasn't angry about the money (we have a good living and I'm not a wastrel), or even "another gun". It was because I ignored her.

She's too good a partner to screw up the relationship with something that small.

[Soap]

I've never had the slightest problem.

[Series 70]

For our 20th anniversary, I took her to a jewelry store and let her pick out a diamond ring. She took me to a gunshop and let me pick out a J-frame. I teased her about having spent more on her, but she retorted that I'd probably go through a couple holsters and at least one pair of grips before I found the right combination, so it'd all work out.

I hate it when she's right.

[CZ-100]

My wife could care less.:neener:

[mtnbkr]

She's not really a "gun person" but knows that I enjoy them and so she supports my "hobby." So long as there's food on the table, a roof over our heads, and the bills are paid (my first priority as well) she's perfectly happy to let me indulge myself

That's my wife in a nutshell. Though, she is starting to become a gun person... :evil:

Chris

[ceetee]

It's funny, even though my wife is in law enforcement, she's one of those "One gun is enough" types... So, like many others here, we have one account for all the "household money" then she gets an allowance, and so do I. She gets to use hers on hairdo's and such, and I get to buy ammo...

[rock jock]

I discuss all large purchases (incuding firearms) with my wife, as she does with me. The day I start hiding stuff is the day we need serious counseling.

[Guy B. Meredith]

Julie's stated position is that everyone needs a hobby or interest and she would worry about me if I didn't have one. Though her comments few years back about looking into self defense weapon gave me my opening to the first purchase she is not interested in firearms. She is not against firearms, just sees them as any other hobby items--coins, stamps, books--and they become a part of the household knick-knacks.

On the other hand, in our house I am the frugal one. Julie is an impulse buyer and brings home an endless stream of items--mostly new age or decorative. I could probably put a guilt trip on her and just buy what I want, but again I am the frugal shopper so discuss anything over a trivial price. The implied guilt trip is probably the reason that she always leave the final decision to me.

[PAshooter]

That's my wife in a nutshell. Though, she is starting to become a gun person...

Good for her! How'd this come about, if I may ask? I'd love for my wife to come over to the dark side, but she shows no interest... she's one of those "afraid of guns" types. I keep gently pushing... trying to get her to at least come to the range with me once and try out something "gentle" but so far nogo. Don't want to push too hard.

BTW - my wife is also the frugal one in the family, except when it comes to spending money on me (and others, particularly at Christmas)... go figure. She buys stuff she wants (mostly foo-foo candle stuff and home decorating knick-knacks) but never spends much money on them... makes her feel guilty - which I always tell her not to. I used to be the same way (guilty about spending my money on myself... came from many years in a crappy first marriage where I was taught to feel that way... another story). She's finally cured me of it... which is why I now need to find a second gun safe :D

Hands down, my wife is the most wonderful woman in the world... and not just because of this.

[mtnbkr]

How'd this come about, if I may ask?

I don't really know for certain. She's never been interested in guns until recently, right before our daughter was born. I think it's because she now understands the defensive use of guns. She (we actually) have something more important than ourselves to protect.

I doubt she'll ever get into them recreationally, but she did enjoy our first trip to the range. She also asks a lot more questions and actually browses around when we go to gunshows.

I try not to push the issue though. I don't want to be overbearing, nor do I want to overwhelm her with facts, figures, tips, etc. Right now, we're concentrating on being comfortable with shooting and just enjoying the activity.

Chris

[Holly76201]

Chris,
Sounds like your wife's conversion is similar to mine. Becoming a Mother turned on my 'tiger' gene. Keep hoping she will get into the recreation side of firearms, I did.

Holly

[cool45auto]

My fiance's pretty cool. If I handle a gun long enough she'll just roll her eyes and say "Go ahead!":D

[Strings]

the problem with my wife isn't "permission". So long as the bills are paid, her only gripe is that the next one is hers. Right now, I'm looking at getting her Kimber to get her off my back...

[NavajoNPaleFace]

My wife, having grown up on the reservation, had little contact with guns until she met me. And that did concern me some way back when.

But, she doesn't even bat an eye if I pick up a new gun.

I have two safes chocked full with more behind clothes in the closet. I'm waiting for after Xmas to get the thrid, and probably my last, safe.

She has shot every gun I have including the 8MM mausers, 1903A3s, the Swedes, the Steyr M95, etc. without even a flinch.

However I can't say she is a BIG gun shooter but rather just shoots when she goes with me.

But, she did surprise me not too long ago. Seeing she has a 70 mile one-way trip to work (and back) through some pretty serious traffic and, sometimes isloated areas, she came to me saying she wanted her own CCW/purse gun. I let her pick it out and she went with the Sig 239 in 9MM.

Personally, I would've gone with a heavier bullet but it's her gun and she can shoot it, too! LOL

I guess I'm like many in here in that I have a keeper.

[MuzzleBlast]

Considering how much money she feeds to those damn horses, my wife is arguing from a VERY weak position.

[Jick42]

There is nothing that is not discussed together in our house. With that said, my wife knows the love of guns i have and is behind me all the way. We only have one account in the household, and we both work, so theres always plenty of money. When i am ready to buy a new gun, i always tell her which one i am getting and how much it is, just so we are both always on the same page. The great thing is she like to go out with me to the range as much as i do, and she gets very upset if she hasnt gotten to go for awhile. I think the only place we really differ, is i have no problem spending a couple thousand on one gun, and she begins to cringe at that. But, that hardly ever happens, only when i've been saving for sometime.

[hillbilly]

I really want to echo that three bank account idea.

That has prevented a lot of potential conflicts in my household.

We have the household account. Both our paychecks go into that account.

Then, we pay ourselves an agreed-upon amount out of that household account, and that money (flexible amount, negotiated, and depending upon number of bills that month, size of paychecks, etc) goes into our own separate personal accounts.

In fact, my wife has both her own checking and savings account. I just take it in cash........of course, that means I have currently about $70 in completely my money, whereas wife has about $1500 in her personal savings account.

But that three bank account system works!

And there are no questions asked when I order a case of ammo, or she brings home a new pottery wheel. It's done with "personal money" only.

hillbilly

[tcsd1236]

My wife always asks how much the gun costs and what I will buy her that costs the same amount of money. Yes, she is serious when she asks.

[mod12]

good gravy, if we had 3 accounts i'd have a service charge on each for "low minimum"

[Gus Dddysgrl]

I'm with Mauserlady. I am a female but I'm still gonna add my .02.

My fiancee is not as into guns as I am, but he likes the fact that I have convinced him to go shooting with me. He has fun and wants to get more into it when we have time and money. I am the only one to have my own gun, but I got money from my b-day for it.

To be honest I didn't discuss it with him since it was my money and we're not married yet. When we do get married I think it will be joint purchases. We don't have much $$ since we are in school and getting married.

Like my father I had to tell my mom. (well he doesn't really tell her all the time since he borrows the money from me. I'll let him talk about her.) She freaked out cause she thought I could have bought a fishing pole instead(it would have been "safer"). Go figure. I think she was more upset that I spent my gun money on a gun and not save it for my wedding. I don't think I'll be telling whe I get a gun, but I will have to wait to buy another one till I move out and don't have to tell her.

Oh well. moms will be moms. It's just my mom is Perfessr's wife.

[SteveS]

I like the 3 accounts idea. We might have to try that. This has never really been a problem. We always discuss any major purchase. If I am interested in a gun I just say so. We'll see if we have the money and I'll get it if we do. This works well because I am more of an impulse buyer. Before we were married, I had 1000's in credit card bills, decent income, and cheap rent. I had no excuse to be in debt. Now, we are pretty much debt free (except for a house payment and student loans), so I trust her judgment when it comes to finances.