Mice Will Play Crazyness


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Redlg155
July 18, 2011, 01:35 PM
Ok Gents,

It is time to absolve yourselves of your sins by confession. I shall start.

It all started one gloomy Sunday when my dear wife had to leave town for a few days to attend a funeral. How would I know that nature would conspire against me and pour out buckets of rain from the skies? How is it that all the necessary ingredients would come together for an improvised indoor shooting session? One .22 bolt action rifle, more specifically, a Savage MKII SVSR and a sweet shooter might I add. 2 boxes of Aguila .22 ammo "sans poudre"- fancy for primer only and no powder. 1 stick on Birchwood Casey target and ahhhh...2 phone books. And finally, one nice long hallway.

Add these ingredients and you have one fun afternoon. It was that or watch the Spice Girls movie. I'll take my makeshift indoor range. By the time I was finished shooting the phone book looked like some crazy hamster had attacked it.

As always, we men leave some trace of our crime. My wife noticed a couple of tiny dots of "confetti" left on the carpet in the hallway. "Strange " I say.." I have no idea where that came from". Of course she knew that I had knew perfectly well where the offending bits had come from, but it would be futile to attempt to question me.

I only confess this because I felt a slight twinge of guilt from the last bow season range...but that's another story. I ask you brothers, to absolve me of guilt and blame, for surely I cannot ask wifey for this favor. I fear the punishment will me more than I can bear.

Other (un) mentionables...
-cupcake pan lead ingot melting on the kitchen stove...i never had a lisp until after that episode.
-Why do my dishrags smell like gun oil? I would have fessed, but technically Break free is not gun oil!
-Did you take your daughters snoopy? No..I did not. The coyote took it before I could fire. Decoy..duh!
-What's that clanging noise in the vacuum cleaner?
- Women get kinda touchy when they find out the dirt smell they have been looking for is a dark earth scent wafer. Hey..you wanted to clean anyway..right?



Anyone else care to share something they may need a bit of forgiveness for?

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dirtykid
July 18, 2011, 01:42 PM
I told my wife the 3-crows i shot were with my pellet-gun and they were "right in the back-yard, up in the tree",,,, ok so they were oficially about 140-yards out in the wooded-area behing my house and yes, i did lay prone on the dining-room floor with my Savage93 .17 and shot thru a cracked-open sliding-door,, but hey, nobody but me was there so it's my story, im sticking to it !! by the way Febreze dosent exactly cover ALL odors,(gunpowder for example)

NoobCannon
July 18, 2011, 01:53 PM
....I may or may not have culled the stray dog population last year by means of a bolt-action .22 and sitting in the back seat of my dad's old crew-cab. A wild, human-fearing pack of 7 or 8 dogs, that tried to maul my sister-in-law. I managed to take care of 5 of them, which has since made living here much more bearable. Less dogs tearing up the trash in the burn pit, less dogs hassling my own, which are both tied to big, shady oak trees.

But the nice old lady next door doesn't know what happened to them.

SharpsDressedMan
July 18, 2011, 03:58 PM
Thank God, someone else is as disturbed as I am! Short on time or I'd list a bunch. Maybe later..................

JustinJ
July 18, 2011, 04:07 PM
"A wild, human-fearing pack of 7 or 8 dogs, that tried to maul my sister-in-law."

"...my own, which are both tied to big, shady oak trees."

Leaving a dog tied up to a tree all day is a good way to turn it into the type that will maul people.

robhof
July 18, 2011, 04:15 PM
The only thing I'll admit to currently is my personal vendetta against grackles, when they got wise to me poking my pellet gun barrel out the back door and fled, I started removing back screens and gently lowering the window enough to shoot, forgot to replace a screen after a great evening of shooting and the wife was wondering why it was against the house. Quick reply was I had to replace the torn screen and got interrupted by a call.

beeenbag
July 18, 2011, 04:54 PM
Yeah I shot a crow out of the garden with a semi auto 22 through a cracked back door. I couldn't find the spent shell casing afterward, wifey did though, under the washer. Wasn't made into a big deal though because she knows what I am capable of when she isn't around.

malakili
July 18, 2011, 05:14 PM
I would never set up a makeshift range inside the house while wifey's at work. I promise.

Although I've read somewhere that a .22 CB short from a Savage Cub is quiet indeed, and furthermore that a simple 2x4 makes a perfectly adequate backstop for such a cartridge.

VA27
July 18, 2011, 05:52 PM
Instant Spackle is handy for patching up arrow holes in the drywall.

Once I set up a cardboard box in the garage to do a little practice with the old Speer plastic bullets and cases. I forgot to put some old carpet in the box, resulting in the need for a new masonite panel in said garage door. Who knew that those plastic pellets had that much penetration?

FROGO207
July 18, 2011, 06:49 PM
The nice neighbor lady feeds the red tree rats daily. So when she goes for mail a couple or three disappear every lunch hour that the timing is there.:D I even buy an occasional bag of sunflower seeds and give them to her seeing as she's on a fixed income and all.:evil:

mokin
July 18, 2011, 07:00 PM
I set up a range upstairs and spent an evening with a .22 and a box of shorts while the wife was out of town. Then there was the time with the chipmunks.... I don't know how the dog could have even got close to one of those guys.

cambeul41
July 18, 2011, 07:01 PM
a couple or three disappear every lunch hour

How do you prepare them?

dovedescending
July 18, 2011, 07:03 PM
Before we had kids... boxes of ammo followed me home from Walmart when I went to pick up toilet paper... the back wall of a closet satisfied my curiosity as to how well my Mauser bayonet would penetrate drywall... I'm sure there have been a few more...

FROGO207
July 18, 2011, 07:26 PM
Never did like the taste of red tree rat.:barf: There is a neighborhood fox that will show up shortly after I start shooting and act as my retriever of sorts. We make a great team. The record is seven in a 1/2 hour:D

Reflecting now I might have to try them grilled with Texas hot sauce, That stuff will make almost anything edible.:D

Ole Coot
July 18, 2011, 08:10 PM
Couple of weeks ago, wife shopping I was reading leaning back in a recliner and decided to dry fire a little. I dropped the mag, pulled the slide and the cartridge popped out and disappeared. I was comfey so I did my double check and dry fired for awhile. Then I couldn't find the round I had ejected and I was in the living room, not my usual loafing place. Never could find it and after a couple of days had to tell the wife who couldn't find it either and refused to vacuum around the chair or piano where I was sitting. Have yet to find it but I am getting darn good with a vacuum cleaner.

wally
July 18, 2011, 08:55 PM
2 boxes of Aguila .22 ammo "sans poudre"- fancy for primer only and no powder. 1 stick on Birchwood Casey target and ahhhh...2 phone books. And finally, one nice long hallway.

Hate to say it, but unless they are lead-free primers not a great idea to be shooting them indoors.

A properly designed indoor range will have the ventilation designed to keep you from breathing the residue, not likely to have such airflow in your home.

SharpsDressedMan
July 18, 2011, 09:12 PM
I guess my best story about shots made with disapproval goes to the time my great uncles and great aunt (brothers and sister) from upstate NY came to visit my folks in Ohio. Mom & Dad lived in the country, and Dad routinely shot from the front door at a bird feeder when squirrels came around to raid it. On this day, my daughter and her little friend were in the living room, all the adults were seated around the round table in the kitchen. Dad looks out, sees a squirrel, and quietly says to me, " Go shoot that squirrel." This involves ever so gently pushing the front door open, and carefully and stealthily sticking the muzzle of the Remington 581 just out the door for a clean shot. All the while, the other adults are oblivious to what is about to happen (or so I thought). Meanwhile, the two girls have a CLEAR idea of what is about to happen, and my daughter's little friend is bursting into tears, ever the little animal lover. The two grils are screaming, crying, etc, but I am focused: I have a loaded gun, the squirrel is in my sights, and anything less than an earthquake or a tap on the shoulder goes completely unnoticed as I concentrate on the shot. Pop! I now can let the rest of the world back in, and I find two girls crying, and all the adults laughing and crying. Apparently, my great uncles, long time hunters, knew what was about to happen, but my great aunt, who was looking out the window, sees this squirrel fall, and exclaims, "Look at that! That squirrel just fell out of the tree!", causing my Dad, Mom, and uncles to bust up. I walk in, see the two girls crying, everyone else laughing, and just say "What?"

NoobCannon
July 18, 2011, 09:34 PM
@JustinJ - If I had a choice, I'd put my dogs somewhere else. But the property doesn't have a fence, the landlord doesn't want to put in a fence, and he doesn't want the dogs inside. The key is to spend plenty of time with them to ensure they're comfortable around humans. My dogs also don't happen to get under the hotwire and harass the calves in the surrounding pastures.

TCU
July 19, 2011, 09:09 AM
i hardly laugh at things people type, but this is the best and funniest thread ive seen on here so far. I used to set up a makeshift range in my parents basement before i went in the USMC. I used to shoot a wayne county michigan phonebook with my dad .22. I thought it was thick enough but it wasnt and i caused damage to the walls pretty bad. Now my wife hardly leaves me home alone, so there goes the range idea. I did shoot my pellet gun in the backyard though last year and i decided to try to shoot a bird. My wife is an animal lover and was pissed. She asked what happened and i told her i tried to scare it by shooting the tree itself but my sights were off. Then she went over and picked up the dead bird and threw it at me while she was crying, i guess she was pretty upset. Then told me i better never shoot anything that im not going to eat so i told her i was planning on cooking up the bird to try it, that story didnt fly though. Wives are crazy!!!

EmbarkChief
July 19, 2011, 11:05 AM
TCU said

Then she went over and picked up the dead bird and threw it at me while she was crying, i guess she was pretty upset.

LMAO, that's the funniest thing I've read in a while.

I've done the "crack the window/door" thing quite a few times utilizing either a pellet or paintball gun here in town.

Kingcreek
July 19, 2011, 11:35 AM
My wife was away with the garden club ladies touring some gardens somewhere. I decided to spend a little of my time stalking the elusive gophers that were becoming a yard pest. I had already shot 2 of them with a Browning Buckmark 10" Silhouette model scoped with a Leupold 4x LER. The wife returned earlier than expected and was about to give a little tour of our yard to 4 garden club ladies. They weren't expecting a dirty, sweaty, armed man hiding prone in the flower bed.

USAF_Vet
July 19, 2011, 11:38 AM
They weren't expecting a dirty, sweaty, armed man hiding prone in the flower bed.

LMAO! Thats some funny stuff right there. I'm curious to know their reaction to such a sight!

natman
July 19, 2011, 11:39 AM
a couple or three disappear every lunch hour

How do you prepare them?

An offer of a blindfold and a cigarette is traditional. :D

HOOfan_1
July 19, 2011, 11:46 AM
They weren't expecting a dirty, sweaty, armed man hiding prone in the flower bed.

http://blogs.seattleweekly.com/dailyweekly/spackler.jpg

Stope Rat
July 19, 2011, 06:41 PM
"An offer of a blindfold and a cigarette is traditional."

Just launched coffee out my nose!



I once used a bullet puller to unload some 7.62x51 cartridges, and then had that moment of inspiration/brainfart that says "Hey! I bet a rubber buckshot round would just fit. And with only a primer pushing it, how bad could it be?"

Ever been trapped in a garage with a hypersonic SuperBall?

lono
July 19, 2011, 11:19 PM
Great thread guys. Love the hypersonic superball.

XM855
July 19, 2011, 11:22 PM
I once used a bullet puller to unload some 7.62x51 cartridges, and then had that moment of inspiration/brainfart that says "Hey! I bet a rubber buckshot round would just fit. And with only a primer pushing it, how bad could it be?"

Ever been trapped in a garage with a hypersonic SuperBall?

That is fantastic.

Just launched coffee out my nose!

Not so fantastic.

TCU
July 20, 2011, 05:08 AM
Stope Rat brings up another funny story of me in high school with your superball story. Me and my buddy made one of those "the works bombs" where you mix the works with aluminum foil and put in in a bottle. So we were in the garage a made one of those things and without thinking and threw it and and it landed right by the door. It started to expand while we were watching it and we realized that we were stuck in the garage with that thing. So we had to run and jump over this sucker without it blowing up, it was pretty hilarious and we barely made it, but we did make it. Ive got a lot of stupid highschool stories.

MikeNice
July 20, 2011, 05:27 AM
I found out my hi-cap 10/22 mags suck. I did it by shooting at skunks from a window in the living room. The things wouldn't feed more than one shot without jamming up. So, I pulled out the Heritage RR and put a .22WMR round through each of them.

My wife came in with the baby as I was putting the guns in the closet. She, just gave me the, "you'll hear about it later" glare. By the time she got the baby down I had all the brass in my pockets. She asked me what was going on. I just looked innocent and said, "cleaning up."

She let it go. She knew she would never get it out of me. The jingle in my pockets when I walked away must have been a give away.

Is it bad I shoot a revolver more accurately than a rifle?

Redlg155
July 20, 2011, 09:02 AM
'll share another story involving my mother several years ago. She has since passed away, but I still laugh when I reminisce.

My mother, being of Asian heritage, more specifically, Thai is not afraid of things that would scare the typical mother. Being the first generation out of Thailand, she has experienced things that would make the normal person cringe in fear. Therefore it was no surprise when she decided to take on the swamp rat problem in our screened in back patio. For those of you who don't know, a Florida swamp rat can grow to over 12 inches in length and weigh a pound or so. Just think of a white lab rat in camouflage and on steroids.

Late one evening we set up our ambush point in the back of the house. My mother chose a broom stick and I chose a pellet rifle as backup. No African elephant hunter had as much excitement as I did that day as I peered through the curtains, our makeshift “blind”. After a short wait we were finally rewarded by a giant swamp rat coming out of the gloom, climbing along the ceiling rafter. This beast was a He-man among rats, a particular specimen to be envied. Surely he had a letterman jacket stashed among his belongings. My mother and I silently approached the beast, my mother in front to gain his attention, me in the back, ready to take the shot. My mother silently nods her head and I take the shot. The world stands still for a moment, time has stopped and I learn two valuable lessons that day. Number 1- sight in your rifle before shooting dangerous game, and 2- Swamp rats are not timid creatures.

It’s strange how you have a moment of clarity before all hell breaks looks. In high definition super zoom vision I see the pellet impact on the beast, hitting his right rear toenail, 3rd toe –rear leg. Whether it was a reaction from his wounded toe causing him to jump, or an extremely agitated state causing him to attack, I’ll never know. What I do know is that I was jolted out of my tunnel vision with my mother screaming and running around with a rat on her back like a little animal backpack! I will say that she remained a brave soul, screaming “shoot it!...shoot it!”. I feel helpless because I knew shooting my mother would be a worse fate. It is far better to not add insult to injury. Ever watched swamp people where the guy keeps hollering “Shoot-em Elizabeth!! Shoot Em!”? There ya go. That’s how I felt.

I do the right thing and scream like a girl, my piercing scream causing the rat to abandon his attack. I retrospect, I’m not sure if the creature was afraid, or that he thought he heard the 8 second buzzer. Ty Murray never had a bull ride as fine as the one that rat had that evening!

Asian people can be a funny lot sometimes. You would think her anger would be towards the rat who attacked her. As fate would have it, I became victim #2 of the broomstick.

NoobCannon
July 20, 2011, 03:10 PM
Well, I'll drag out a story of my youth....

I was about 10 or so, just gotten home from school, and all I wanted to do was watch cartoons. My brother was 13 at the time, and he was getting into that macho-man-of-the-house phase, and he wanted me to go empty the dishwasher. Like any other little kid enraptured by cartoons, I didn't listen. Like any other hormone-addled teen that didn't get his way, he got mad. So He started beating me up until I went and did the dishes.

I wasn't about to let this go unsettled though. I knew my dad kept a BB gun in the downstairs closet, and old Daisy pump-action.

I snuck down there to go get it, and I must've put 10-15 pumps on it, with one little, itty-bitty steel BB as my ammo. I decided to make that shot count when I found my brother talking to one of his friends on the phone in the Den.

From the stairway in the foyer to the den must've been about 20 feet, and I lined my shot up carefully. Tears in my eyes and welts on my upper body, I lined up...

...right dead-center on his backside.

The BB gun popped, he jumped and screamed.

You ever hear the song "BB Gun" by Roger Alan Wade? If not, check it out, and you'll see what I mean.

My mother was furious when I got home. My dad, however, could not stop laughing. I got him right dead center of his soft-target. the BB travelled through his shorts and underwear, and ended up where I'd rather not think about.

Since then, My brother's learned I'm not one to let him get away with punking me around.

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