Conversation with my mother-in-law


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pax
January 31, 2003, 03:16 AM
I had an interesting conversation with my mom-in-law earlier this week. She asked me, with somewhat elaborate casualness, "Bob tells me you've been taking a lot of shooting classes...?"

"Yep," I told her, "I've got another class coming up in March, an advanced class which I'm taking over because I didn't do as well on the test at the end as I'd hoped. It's pretty challenging stuff."

She shot me a weird, sidelong glance, and then said, "Well, as long as you enjoy it. You know, guns really scare me. I like shooting at paper a little bit, but ... I'd never be able to shoot it, like at another person I mean. And guns really do scare me."

I nodded. "Yeah, I know what you mean."

"My husband kept telling me I should carry one, back when I was doing all that driving every weekend by myself. But I thought, you know, I'm not going to use it, I really wouldn't."

I told her, "I understand what you're saying. I think you're safer without a gun than with one, if you aren't sure you could use it, if it came to that."

She said, "Yeah, that's it exactly. It really would get taken away from me and used against me, if I wasn't willing to use it."

"Well, that's true. If you don't think you would use it if you needed it, you shouldn't carry a gun."

She nodded. "Anyway, um, er (stammer stammer stutter), I wanted to ask you. Do you think you could use a gun, like that? Really?"

She obviously expected me to say no, or to have some problem answering. Deep breath. "Ah, yeah, I could." She blinked. I said, "I wasn't sure at first, but I got thinking about the kids. If someone tried to hurt or kill one of my babies --"

She said, "--you'd tear his head off!"

Laugh. "Yeah, I would, too. Wouldn't have to think about it at all. Don't touch the kid."

"But, what if it was just you?"

"Just me? Well, growing up without a mom would hurt the kids, wouldn't it?"

She was quiet for a minute, then said, "Yeah, I can see how you could get there that way." Then she changed the subject so abruptly that I had to wonder if she'd just decided that she had the moral equivalent of an axe-murderer as a daughter in law. :D

pax

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city. -- George Burns

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DadOfThree
January 31, 2003, 03:34 AM
pax,
Then she changed the subject so abruptly that I had to wonder if she'd just decided that she had the moral equivalent of an axe-murderer as a daughter in law.
Seems to me you were just making her have some thoughts about the legitimacy of her previous stand. Good for you!! No reason to pound someone over the head with your beliefs, just plant a seed. BTW, my mom-in-law just recently asked me to teach her how to shoot. While she wasn't really an anti, she was too afraid of them to learn. Let's change the world, one at a time.

JimP
January 31, 2003, 03:54 AM
Good work guys. Trained the wife how to shoot when we were dating (we both spent a week with a professional trainer so she wouldn't worry about me doing the usual crap boyfriends do). She carries a Ruger GP-100 - can do speed loads faster than most guys can change magazines.

Trained her mom on a visit. She now has a carry permit and is active in shooting. I just love it when a plan comes together.

Jus a thought, I think it is selfish of people to sacrifice their lives in the hope that a killer won't rape/pillage/kill/insert-crime-here____ again. When given the chance - clean the pool; especially if your life is at stake.

sensop
January 31, 2003, 04:26 AM
Good show, Pax. I sense a lot of patience in that conversation.

voilsb
January 31, 2003, 05:01 AM
sounds like it was probably a pretty hard conversation to have. but then again, maybe not. for me, it would have been. but that's because I'm a fairly quiet person and my family doesn't really do much talking, only casual conversation stuff

Viking6
January 31, 2003, 07:44 AM
I don't know the usual dynamic between you and your mother-in-law but it sounds like she was curious (maybe a little concerned) and ended the conversation with at least a partially open mind. You did a good job of articulating your position.

Marshall
January 31, 2003, 07:58 AM
She was testing the water. ;)

mpthole
January 31, 2003, 10:52 AM
PAX: That was A W E S O M E ! ! ! ! ! :D

TallPine
January 31, 2003, 10:58 AM
Yeah, isn't it funny how someone would "tear somebody's head off" to protect their children, but couldn't imagine pointing a gun at them and pulling the trigger?

I guess tearing their head off is cleaner and less painful ... ?

:rolleyes:

MonkeyMan
January 31, 2003, 11:04 AM
Great job PAX. I suspect that the conversation ended the way it did not because she was uncomfortable with you but with the thought process that was forming in her mind. No slam on your mother-in-law but from my experience a rational thought is anathema to the anti-gun mind. Slow and steady wins lots of races.

Patience and pax.:)

4v50 Gary
January 31, 2003, 11:07 AM
Good for you Pax. Your struck her maternal instinct of protecting the offspring.

lostdog
January 31, 2003, 11:30 AM
From those of us with mothers...thanx. your political incorectness is inspiring

Blackhawk
January 31, 2003, 11:32 AM
Well done, pax! :neener:

Harold Mayo
January 31, 2003, 12:03 PM
Sometimes they just can't put two and two together, can they? And, when they do, it shakes up their world so much that they can't really face it.

GregoryTech
January 31, 2003, 12:09 PM
...I had to wonder if she'd just decided that she had the moral equivalent of an axe-murderer as a daughter in law.

It actually sounded to me like she "got it."

:)

Good job!

Calamity Jane
January 31, 2003, 12:25 PM
Goodonya, Pax! Well done. :)

Maybe someday she'll come to the realization that even a person who is not a parent has the right to protect his or her own life, too.

That is, EVERYONE - parents and non-parents alike. :cool:

King
January 31, 2003, 12:35 PM
Well done Pax...I'm betting that she's gone from being worried to at least feeling more comfortable with it. You handled it well and she'll be more and more comfortable with it as time goes on.

:)

BogBabe
January 31, 2003, 05:05 PM
Excellent handling of the conversation, Pax! You at least got her to think about the issue from a different angle than she ever did before.

Agreeing with her that she shouldn't have a gun if she's not sure she could pull the trigger was wise in multiple ways, too.

My future mom-in-law likely won't be a problem in that arena -- she wants to get an assault rifle purely because DiFi and Chuckie don't want her to have one. :)

JohnK
January 31, 2003, 05:35 PM
From those of us with mothers...thanx. your political incorectness is inspiring

I agree well done, but who says it was politically incorrect? By allowing those who oppose us to define something we're already giving in to them. In our point of view this was completely "politically correct".

It's a tough mindset to overcome, but one we should strive for.

JohnKSa
February 1, 2003, 01:22 AM
JohnKSa's Mother-in-Law: I could sure have used one of your guns at work today, some people are SO difficult to deal with.

JohnKSa: I don't lend my guns.

JohnKSa's Mother-in-Law: Well then maybe I could pay you to shoot them.

JohnKSa: (Laughing) I'm VERY expensive.

JohnKSa's Mother-in-Law: (Immediately changes subject and never brings it up again.)

I joke around a lot and she's never really sure when I'm kidding and when I'm not.

Lisa and I still laugh about this. I can't talk about my work and I often wonder what people think I do. I think I have an idea what my Mother-in-Law thinks... :D

rick458
February 1, 2003, 01:28 AM
The Father of one of my closest friends
feels he could not kill a person for any reason
including the protection of his life or any others
the big difference with him is that he does believe other people have the right to defend themselves and their loved ones (and no he does not think others should do his killing for him)
I respect his point of view as he does mine
BTW one of his sons is an ex Marine, and the other is a CHL instructor go figure

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