Critique my letter, give statistics


June 10, 2004, 09:01 PM
I write to you today to implore you to vote against the upcoming renewal of the ineffectual Assault Weapons Ban of 1994. This law is based solely upon hearsay and conjecture about military-pattern semi-automatic firearms, conjecture that says that these are dangerous and somehow different from normal hunting rifles. The only difference from normal hunting rifles accepted under the ludicrous notion of “sporting purposes” is the ability to accept a larger magazine, which is very handy at the shooting range; a pistol grip, which makes firing the firearm more comfortable; a bayonet lug, for authenticity, as I can find no reports of drive-by bayonetings and can confirm that it does not aid in firing from the hip accurately; and a flash-suppressor, which shields the shooter from the blinding nature of the gun’s exhaust. These cosmetic features are what are being banned, and because something is “scary looking” is no reason to write a law, much less aid the continuance of an unConstitutional and useless law.

In fact, the only thing this ban has done is to make the price of ten-years and older military-pattern rifles skyrocket simply because they are rare, much like fully-automatic firearms that have been highly restricted since 1934 by the National Firearms Act, despite what the Violence Protection Center and the Brady Center for Gun Violence might infer with its confusing anti-gun propaganda. Terms like “rapid fire” and “fires multiple rounds in seconds” are very misleading, when in reality any self-loading firearm not regulated by the NFA of 1934 is a semi-automatic. One pull of the trigger per bullet fired.

(CRIME SECTION, STATISTICS) <---I need help with this section

In closing, I once again beseech you to look into this issue very carefully, study the facts, ignore the propaganda that passes off lies and fear of inanimate objects as fact from those with a slanted anti-freedom agenda, and remember that the Second Amendment states that “the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.” The Assault Weapons Ban is the biggest infringement of the individual right to keep and bear arms of the last 40 years, one that your constituents will remember your position on in November.

Well, I need some facts for the crime section. I seriously doubt that it will be read and taken seriously, but what the hell. This one is specifically written to Sen. Lincoln, and I will tweak it for Sen. Pryor.

For my Rep, I will be sending a letter of thanks for the great job he has been doing, thanks for his assured vote against this massive stupidity, and that he has my vote in November.

Thanks for your help!

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Standing Wolf
June 10, 2004, 10:33 PM
I write to you today to implore you...

I once again beseech you...

"Implore" and "beseech" aren't the right verbs. I'd use "urge" and "ask."

June 11, 2004, 12:29 PM
...of the Gun Owner Protection Act of 86, which froze the number of such guns in civilian hands. Therefore, the price went through the roof. The '34 act just made it darn difficult to buy them legally.

June 12, 2004, 09:17 PM

June 12, 2004, 09:42 PM
My visual image of "implore" and "beseech" is that of a man on his knees asking for a favor. Don't think this is the case.

Consider "Don't vote to renew the AWB."

Consider "The AWB is a fraud and hoax which you have voted for (if true) in the past. Don't compound you initial error by doing it again.

Can the details of the features banned by the AWB. Make the entire letter straight to the point. Ruthlessly edit out all but the essential message.

No smaller font than #10, one inch page margins, and no second page.

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