So this is what your supposed to do, because guns are inappropriate.

Not to mention a billionaire with access to high end R&D toys.

I just use the force.

I just plan on asking the home invaders to please not steal my stuff and rape my wife. Politely, of course. After all, we live in a civilized society, right?? Everyone we all meet on a day to day basis is reasonable and sane, yes??? We have to give criminals a chance, cause after all, they're people too........

Not to mention it's a comic...

I have a readily swingable blunt weapon. It's made by Springfield Armory and says 1911-A1 on the side. It's heavy too. Once I bludgeon the intruder with it I can put in a mag to defend myself against the "authorities" that will come to arrest me for owning a gun and having the nerve to defend myself and my family with it as they take the perp to the hospital to be fixed on my dime so that he can then sue me because he only broke into my home to take stuff, not hurt me.....

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Screamin' Eagle, I'm glad I'm a signature contributor!

My "improvised weapon" is the bayonet on the end of my Mosin. I just identified my precise stab point with the muzzle flash.

My "improvised weapon" is the bayonet on the end of my Mosin. I just identified my precise stab point with the muzzle flash.

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I really don't even want to imagine touching off a Mosin in a house.

I have a monitored alarm system, outside motion detector lighting, two attack trained Yorkies, and I keep all doors and windows locked. Also, I keep a Winchester 12ga Home Defender loaded with buckshot under my side of the bed and my better half keeps a Colt Det. Spl. .38 on her night stand.This is how we do it. I couldn't care less what liberals do.

Oh wow.

I'm used to stupid people. There are a lot of stupid people. But this is on a whole new level.

Is it bad to write an article about how to protect your home with particular focus on the non lethal? No. Is it bad to chastise people for using a gun? Is that a question that even needs answering?? Maybe the author was born without self preservation tendencies, but that doesn't mean he should endanger the lives of others by talking to them like they have the fighting skills of a DC superhero.

If going toe-to-toe with a potentially drug-crazed home invader while armed with little more than a large stick and some adrenaline doesn't seem like a situation likely to work out in your favor, ranged chemical weapons like pepper spray, mace, or bear repellent can help you even the odds.

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He admits that his self defense advise is bunk, and then suggests "evening the odds" by adding a ranged weapon.. You guessed it! Mace! Because mace is definitely going to stop a home invader so high he can't even feel pain.

Suprised they didn't advocate for putting up gun free zone stickers.

"ranged chemical weapons like pepper spray, mace, or bear repellent can help you even the odds."

Umm I am not using any of those indoors.

"You should avoid excessively long or thin weapons like bo staves or kendo swords as they will inhibit your movements in the close quarters of your apartment"

Does he realize a baseball bat is just as long as a Kendo Stick? Yet he reccomends a baseball bat.

Brilliant!!!!!!!!

I love seeing articles like this. it reminds me to dry fire and do another "walk through" of my house.

By the time I got to the end of this article I still couldn't tell if he was being serious... I like how he admits that home security systems simply alert people something has happened, they don't actually prevent anything or have direct response capabilities. It just boils down to some people choosing to protect themselves and others choosing to trust other people to protect them... personally I'm in the first camp.

I'm all for helping your fellow man, but I absolutely refuse to rely on someone else to be there when I need them and I'm far more comfortable having the option to help myself.

I like my chances with a gun, thank you.

EDIT: I also think it's ridiculous how people don't want to acknowledge the deterrent effect of a gun. Any burglar in a house is going to leave a hell of a lot faster if he hears a 12 gauge being pumped down the hall versus hearing some little yap-dog sniffing him begging for a treat.

Okay, any time someone cites a comic book as a basis for their serious argument, they've automatically lost credibility.

Course I've seen similar "logical" thinking before... a while back, regarding the women-in-combat issue, someone stated that women can be effective in combat because the sniper in Full Metal Jacket was a girl!


And these people vote?!

Stress_Test said:

Okay, any time someone cites a comic book as a basis for their serious argument, they've automatically lost credibility.

Course I've seen similar "logical" thinking before... a while back, regarding the women-in-combat issue, someone stated that women can be effective in combat because the sniper in Full Metal Jacket was a girl!


And these people vote?!

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Yeah, if superheroes were so great then why has Phoenix Jones gotten beat up repeatedly? Hehehe

"Okay, any time someone cites a comic book as a basis for their serious argument, they've automatically lost credibility. "

THIS!!!!!

Ms_Dragon said:

I wonder if Timmy wrote that article?

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So his legacy lives on... Timmy was actually fairly logical in most approaches and was willing to listen to reason. This author is on a different tier.

So, what, you think you're better than Batman? The Caped Crusader's out there protecting an entire city without packing heat but you can't defend your little abode without a gun? For shame! Here are four methods for protecting you and yours without exercising the Second Amendment.

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Batman is a genius with decades of martial arts training, unlimited wealth, wonderful toys, and a traumatized psyche that drives him to beat criminals to a bloody pulp night after night. I don't think anyone else is.

With a sense of smell 100,000 times more sensitive and hearing range four times that of a human's, not to mention superior low-light visibility, dogs make for wonderful intruder early warning systems. And even if you opt for something as small and unintimidating as a Bichon Frisse, its high-pitched yipping will easily rouse even the deepest sleeper and ward off all but the most determined burglars.

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Wait. When did Batman have dogs? Wasn't that Superman's thing?

He admits that his self defense advise is bunk, and then suggests "evening the odds" by adding a ranged weapon.. You guessed it! Mace! Because mace is definitely going to stop a home invader so high he can't even feel pain.

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Should have suggested supplementing the Mace with an actual mace; 1d8 piercing and bludgeoning damage works great to deter aggression.

Course I've seen similar "logical" thinking before... a while back, regarding the women-in-combat issue, someone stated that women can be effective in combat because the sniper in Full Metal Jacket was a girl!

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Now if he had talked about female Soviet snipers and pilots during WW2 on the other hand...

I am not entirely convinced the article was written seriously. The writing style, for one, is on par with an 8th grader's. Actually, I'd rather just believe it's a joke, anyway. :banghead:

I could get on board with the article if it was more along the lines of "what else you can do to supplement your security in addition to firearms," though.

"ranged chemical weapons"

My ranged chemical weapon dispenses lead.

Fake and lame. The person who wrote that article HAS to be a troll or someone who thinks it's possible to do the matrix and dodge bullets. NOBODY can be that stupid unless they are related to Chris Mathews.

Layers of protection
LAYERS
with one of those layers being my long distance 0.357" hole-punch.

Besides the anti-gun slant, I find it to be a useful article. Many people make the gun the only part of their home defense plan. When in reality there are many other aspects that should come into play way before the gun does.

The whole Batman thing is silly though. Kinda points to the antis delusion when they talk about Batman like he's an actual person "out there, protecting a whole city" Sure I don't need guns, I'll just use my giant mech-suit to fight the bad guys like in <insert favorite robot anime here>
Apparently me using a gun is horrible and immoral while blasting through a city in a tank and a motorcycle equipped with cannons is totally cool.

BSnyder said:

I really don't even want to imagine touching off a Mosin in a house.

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Upside is you'll only have to endure it for one shot. Won't be much of a house left after that nuclear explosion of a muzzle-blast. Plus if you miss you'll both be deaf and blind so that fight is pretty much over

miller.lyte said:

I am not entirely convinced the article was written seriously.

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Pretty sure the first line of it wasn't written seriously. I have read a lot of tech sites over the past few years. HardOCP, Dailytech, anandtech. The users and in the case of HardOCP, the administrator are usually pretty pro gun, or if not pro gun they are very Libertarian and believe in all the amendments. HardOCP is run by some guys who are as fanatical about their guns as they are about their tech.