Don't Think I Was Out Of Line But I Pissed The Guy Off.

chicharrones said:

This is an interesting thread.

I have seen the Scaatylobos out there in the world in street clothes or in another job after retirement. The no BS mentality is ever present. I think the criminal element recognizes it immediately.

Also interesting is the way people move and the face that God gave them. That video is pretty good at making fun of that. Kinda like the kid growing up that looked tough whether he was in reality or not.

Myself, I have one of those friendly approachable faces and I used to be quick to smile to anyone. Living in this huge city almost all my life has hardened me towards other people when it comes to trust and the way I respond to them. Firm, polite, but not friendly, and no smile is the best I can do for strangers on the street these days. If I have to interact with another person, I will be the first to offer a greeting though. It puts others at ease to some degree.

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Thank you , I think that was a compliment [ if you see the world as I do ].

And it is also THE reason I still get " made " as a cop.

And the reason I can spot another cop, or possible hostile.

I truly try to avoid conflict as I have seen too many times the outcome in court and jails.

Sadly,there is no such thing as EVER 'winning' a confrontation,just the possibily and hope that you walk away alive .

THEN = get to s'plain it to the grand jury etc.

Trunk Monkey said:

Nope, dude was offended by my behavior.

I realize this isn't a manners forum but I tend not to pick up on social cues and if I'm blatantly doing something that could unnecessarily escalate a situation from nothing to a confrontation it's probably good tactics to stop doing it.

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Which is more important to you. Offending the guy or you being a victim?

Simple as that.

Make sure you have some OC spray at the minimum in case they get violent. And if possible a surveillance camera nearby that can show what really went down. Just don't start any argument. If they look po'ed at you, just say 'howdy'. Never ever get into an augment if you can help it.

Deaf

Which is more important to you. Offending the guy or you being a victim?

Simple as that.

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Why would it be as simple as that? Why would those be the sole available options?

Only the most socially stunted person would look at an interaction between two strangers passing on the street and see only those two possibilities.

Sam1911 said:

Why would it be as simple as that? Why would those be the sole available options?

Only the most socially stunted person would look at an interaction between two strangers passing on the street and see only those two possibilities.

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"I had to run back to work last night (09/02) to return a key I accidentally brought home. I walked out of my building (the upright of the L) just as someone came around the corner of the next building. Since I didn't know the guy I just stopped on the steps and kept an eye on him until he walked around the corner of my building then I got in my car and left."

Night time, coming out of an apartment ('my building'), going around the corner. It's situations like this that one thinks ...

Which is more important to you. Offending the guy or you being a victim?

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That is why.

Deaf

Oh, well that doesn't explain it. Thanks!

Sam1911 said:

Why would it be as simple as that? Why would those be the sole available options?

Only the most socially stunted person would look at an interaction between two strangers passing on the street and see only those two possibilities.

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Its as "simple as that" and as complex as you could EVER imagine.
Your interaction is for a split second or so,that allows you to do VERY little .
IF you avoid a confrontation for ANY reason [ he thinks your hand in your pocket indicates your armed ] then you WIN ---- IF you avoided a confrontation.
The type of person looking for a victim,is just that LOOKING FOR A VICTIM.
NOT a possible threat to their health,and ability to be on the streets and active.
IF that person is a real innocent,they will not even notice you or your attitude.
Only another alert and active person will see that your on alert and being situational.
AND no one who is so inclined,would take umbrage at anothers "situational" manner.
Leastwise not happened to me in my 69 years on this planet ------- Thank the good Lord.

scaatylobo said:

Its as "simple as that" and as complex as you could EVER imagine.
Your interaction is for a split second or so,that allows you to do VERY little .
IF you avoid a confrontation for ANY reason [ he thinks your hand in your pocket indicates your armed ] then you WIN ---- IF you avoided a confrontation.
The type of person looking for a victim,is just that LOOKING FOR A VICTIM.
NOT a possible threat to their health,and ability to be on the streets and active.
IF that person is a real innocent,they will not even notice you or your attitude.
Only another alert and active person will see that your on alert and being situational.
AND no one who is so inclined,would take umbrage at anothers "situational" manner.
Leastwise not happened to me in my 69 years on this planet ------- Thank the good Lord.

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No, there is another type of person who isn't looking for a victim, yet is not innocent. Some punk who was going about his business (can't be mugging 24/7), but sees an interaction like this as a challenge, a threat to his ego and provokes a confrontation.

Again, probably not an issue for a 69 yo as the punk a. probably won't think you are challenging them due to your age and b. won't get any street cred from beating you up or provoking something. All factors matter and things change as our age, environment, and experience changes. I also get "made" as a cop on occasion and I've never been one.

If you take an interest in people you won't piss them off. You are treating these people with contempt. People naturally feel offended when treated with contempt. I always greet people with a smile and some very light comment, usually about the weather. You are in the same boat with these people. They are not "potential threats", Don't look down on them. This is "Christian" advise. You may not like it.

If I was walking and seen someone coming around a corner, stand still and stop what they were doing and wait for me to leave the area, I'd assume THEY were the suspicious one. What if he stopped what he was doing and did the same back to you? Would it be two guys just staring at each other both waiting for the other to leave?

If your neighborhood is bad enough that you have to stare at everyone until they leave to ensure your safety I'd move. It's one thing to be aware of your surroundings, it's another to assume everyone is a threat and stare them down.

Trunk Monkey said:

I'm begining to think I'm posting in Chinese. What's most important to me, as I have stated numerous times, is not provoking a needless confrontation if I can avoid it at all.

Best block no be there

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You said it was "I had to run back to work last night (09/02) to return a key I accidentally brought home. I walked out of my building (the upright of the L) just as someone came around the corner of the next building. Since I didn't know the guy I just stopped on the steps and kept an eye on him until he walked around the corner of my building then I got in my car and left."

So, did you stare them down or just casually check them over and not turn your back on them? Did you give him the 'evil eye'? Furrow your brow? Clinch your fist?

If you don't want 'needless confrontation' why not turn your back and ignore everyone? Not a real good idea, especially at night, right?

So what are you gonna do?

You see, it being night time, coming out of your apartment, going around the corner, well that's a situation that calls for a bit more alertness than just walking the streets in daylight. If you ignore them you just might get that confrontation, real sudden like. The trick is to acknowledge their presence, like nodding your head, mentally keeping track of them, and not staying in dangerous conditions.

Think about it.

Deaf

Traffer said:

If you take an interest in people you won't piss them off. You are treating these people with contempt. People naturally feel offended when treated with contempt. I always greet people with a smile and some very light comment, usually about the weather. You are in the same boat with these people. They are not "potential threats", Don't look down on them. This is "Christian" advise. You may not like it.

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It 's your butt, do as you please.
BUT please don't give me religious lectures.
My faith has NOTHING to do with my street survival and my street cred's and general knowledge.
Born & raised in NYC & 26 years as a cop, and still have no scars to show for that.
So,I will keep to my actions and thoughts as to how to act on the streets.

Just don't walk through bad neighborhoods wearing a Trump tee shirt...

All manner of criminal mindset exists out there. Watchful is the order of the day. I carry everywhere I go and encourage the wife to do likewise, whenever possible.

I am especially vigilant after my wife (cancer patient) was punched in the face while sitting in our car by a street punk in broad daylight, at 3 o'clock on a Friday afternoon during rush hour traffic in downtown Denver.

I teach "condition yellow" (situational awareness) at all times while in public and presume nothing...

M