Dr. Seuss visits THR

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Seuss it out

I will not shoot you with a Glock
I just don't thing the durn things rock
I will not shoot you with a Glock
At the dock
on the clock
behind a rock
I will not shoot you with a Glock
I just don't think the durn things rock

No, I will shoot you with a Colt
I'll have to plug you if you bolt
Yes, I will shoot you with a Colt
In your coat
by the moat
Please take note
That I will shoot you with a Colt
I will plug you if you bolt...

I may pick up a Smith & Wesson,,,
An older J-frame I'm confessin'...

Stop me before I rhyme again...

Cheers, TF; who was forced to read "Green Eggs and Ham" to his first grade class...
 
Geeze, you guys just blew the "gun owners are all ignorant red necks that can barely read and write" theory. That's kind of a mean thing to do to the antis. :D
 
[grins, looks down, shuffles feet]

Aw, shucks. T'waren't nuthin' Wrote itself.

[/grins, looks down, shuffles feet]
 
A very minor correction...

sm,

Thanks so much for the accolades! I'm really glad you enjoyed it. It was fun to write.

One thing in your post really caught my eye, though...
You wrote:
<David Allen Coe>

LWGN re-wrote his poem, and posted it for all to read.
He done posted the perfect Dr. Suess THR Poem.

</off>
Click to expand...

I've made a teeny tiny pronoun correction - I hope you don't mind:

<David Allen Coe>

LWGN re-wrote her poem, and posted it for all to read.
She done posted the perfect Dr. Suess THR Poem.

</off>

I have been told that I'm an honorary guy on more than one occasion, and I guess it must be true, LOL! (Just don't tell that to my husband...he'll be heartbroken.)
 
LWGN

Damn Internet!

My most sincere southern gentleman apologies ma'am. *tips hat*

Oh, please call me Steve.


<David Allan Coe>

...and she never even called me by name - Coe



Darlin',...oops...Ma'am, how we coming on that poem for THR, done up like Edgar Allan Poe's The Raven ?

<sets down pail of chocolate>

*Please!!*

What is that?
Oh yes ma'am, I stay in trouble around here, how did you guess?


*smile*
 
Steve,

I thought your original request for a Poe-style poem was directed to someone else. If you want me to work on one, I'd be happy to, but it might not get finished until next week - now that the holiday weekend is over, I don't have nearly as much time on my hands.

I think it would be fun.

Maybe THR needs a gun fiction and poetry forum ...
 
Ma'am,

My request was directed at you.
I know I speak for other THR members when I type, how wonderful your work is, and we really appreciate you taking the time in doing these, and sharing with us all.

You are fairly new to THR, and I did not know you had this gift, as did others not know.
We know we have some other gifted members, and some of them posted their works because of you.

As long as the thread is firearm related, work such as this is allowed.
THR keeps sub-forums to a minimum, so in General Discussion is where literary works are posted.

THR Mission Statement is about responsible firearm ownership.
We never know whom is reading, whether they are Anti, or Fence Sitter, or even Pro Gun, RKBA.

As others have posted in replies, your works, and those of others, do attract folks to responsible firearm ownership, and RKBA - while at the same time dispelling myths and stereotypes Anti Gun and Anti RKBA promote about us.

We all have talents and gifts, and these all work toward a common goal.

Thank you and welcome to THR.

Steve
 
Here's what I got for Poe, but now I got writer's block.

Once upon a midnight stormy, while I read a shooting story,
Over many a long and drawn out volume of The High Road’s lore,
While I nodded, nearly crashing, suddenly there came a smashing,
As of some one loudly bashing windows next to my back door.
`'Tis some criminal,' I muttered, `glad my gun is in the drawer.
wake up, honey, load up yours.'
Click to expand...
 
Colin,

Great start!

Here are a few lines to jumpstart things again. Feel free to edit, modify, or omit as desired.

911, my wife was dialing, as we glimpsed the burglar smiling:
our belongings he was piling in the middle of the floor.
If our eyes did not deceive us, he was moving to retrieve us!
Angrily I bade him leave us, through the barricaded door.
Click to expand...

Or, alternatively,


911, my wife was dialing, as we glimpsed the burglar smiling:
our belongings he was piling in the middle of the floor.
Since our eyes did not deceive us, angrily I bade him leave us;
killing him would deeply grieve us, and might stain the new wood floor.
Click to expand...




Also, consider changing "midnight stormy" to "midnight hoary" (frosty) to maintain the internal rhyme of the original.
 
Us knuckle draggin', gun totin' hillbillies like that prose . . . Way to Git 'er done LWGN!
 
Horton Hears a Gunshot

The Cat in the Glock Hat

How the Grinch Stole Firearms

Green Tips and Ham

One Fish, Two Fish, Shoot Fish, Eat Fish
 
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