Limerick topic

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Oleg Volk

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A friend has to write a limerick based on the story A good man is hard to find. My quick try is here:
Three lawful adults versus three psychopaths
A classic example which begs for sidearms
They were injured already but they weren't ambushed
Yet they went to the slaughter like 1940s' Jews
But at the point of death, did Grandma wish for a gun?

I think others here can come up with better lines.
 
Can't chase those links, Oleg, but yours is no limerick. Limerick is:

a (9 or so syllables)
a (9 or so syllables)
b (6 or so)
b (6 or so)
a (10-12)

"There was a young man from Nantucket".....

etc.

Usually tasteless, and almost never repeatable in polite company.
 
Oleg, you know that limericks rhyme, right?

The problem is that limericks are supposed to be humorous. Nothing too funny about this story.

Still, here are a couple of tries:

A family took quite a spill
But they would be here with us still
Had they followed the rule
Learned in some hard-knocks school
Shoot fast and shoot straight: shoot to kill

When traveling with son and with daughter
If you don't bring a gun then you oughter
For when things get quite tense
You can make your defense
Otherwise you'll just be cannon fodder
 
There once were some Jews in Warsaw
who hid away rifles when they foresaw
the cattle trains lining up at the station
and grimly discerned the final destination
And weighing the situation clearly
made their enemies pay very dearly

But the Jews in Krakow, in Minsk and in Prague,
filed silently away, ahead of the man with the prod.
They paid for their own death with possessions and hair
with the gold from their teeth; then rose into the air
borne away on the smoke over a world that didn’t care
If life has great value, then don’t sell it cheaply.
Keep your gun by your side, don’t get on the train meekly
 
I realize the Limerick has nothing to do with what Oleg needs... But, I started thinking of Oleg's line about his Grandma and I couldn't help but contrast that with who had resisted, in Warsaw.
One the one hand, they all died (resisters and non-resisters alike)... Yet, those who resisted must have died with some satisfaction...? Or maybe it doesn't matter once you're dead. I don't know.

I do know that those few resisters in Warsaw held up an entire army for some weeks. If they had all resisted, how many might have survived? How much sooner would the war have ended if more armies were tied up in Kracow, Budapest and Sophia, instead of at the gates of Leningrad and Stalingrad?

Keith
 
Hutch is 100% correct, limerick is 5 lines, in the syllable amounts he described.

Here's an example...somewhat fitting considering Oleg's poor limerick:

There once was a man with a yearning,
So he came to me looking for learning,
But I set his head right,
Said, "Write only at night,"
For you'll need your day job to keep earning."
 
Please, people! A limerick goes like this:

duh-DA-duh-duh-DA-duh-duh-DAY
duh-DA-duh-duh-DA-duh-duh-DAY
duh DA-duh-duh-DOO
duh DA-duh-duh-DOO
duh-DA-duh-duh-DA-duh-duh-DAY

Get it? Lines 1, 2, and 5 rhyme (Keith - look up "rhyme"), as do 3 and 4.

Like a sonnet or a Haiku, a limerick has a very closely prescribed form.

Oleg (though he ignored it :) ) even posted a link: http://www.sfu.ca/~finley/discussion.html
 
Hmm. That's one of my favorite short stories, but asking for a limerick from it seems pretty odd. Now I do have some awesome knock-knock jokes inspired by "Death in Venice" and a comic opera in the works of "Heart of Darkness."
 
There once was an old lady who read
about the Misfit who dealt in lead.
On the Road to Tennesee,
they found the Misfit, oh me,
And now, her whole family is dead.


Or.....

On a dusty back road in the hills,
She recognized the bad man who kills.
Bang went Bailey,
and then John Wesley,
And the Misfit? He just did it for thrills.

hillbilly
 
You all make my eyes bleed.

You can count a fifteen-round magazine, but not nine syllables or five lines?

:uhoh:
 
How about this:

There once lived a guy named Twoblink.
He looks like Skunky but don't stink.
His calculations were mysical
Of subjects cowboy logistical
But they don't make sense like he think.

:neener:
 
There once was a man called The Misfit
Who met with a talky old nitwit.
She blubbered and cried,
when he shot her, she died,
And he's with Bobby Lee and Hiram, the half-wits.

hillbilly
 
Maybe not a "true" limerick in every nitpicky sense of the word, but I do like the way this one sounds....


Ahem.............



A good man is so hard to find.
Harder still, for the tactically blind.
Lady carries no gun,
So the Misfit has fun.
And leaves only bodies behind.

hillbilly
 
Poem From A Friend

I don't know if this helps, but a friend of mine wrote it years ago (before the S&W bruhaha with Clinton):

Some say they put their faith in God,
Such is their profession
But for me, I'm more worldly
I trust my Smith and Wesson.
 
There once was a Skunk named Jeff
Who was thin and needed to gain heff
He's anything but practical
He's fragile but tactical
He's always wearing black or CF.

:neener:
 
we have here a group that has read,
of the misfit who shot grandma dead,
the battle is thick,
for a good lim'rick trick,
but they should read "wise blood" instead...

:rolleyes:

studied flannery a bit, very interesting author...

you DON'T want to be the controlling, manipulative character in her stories

they never fare well,,,

:D

(chuckle,,,still editing)
 
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There once was a family unarmed,
Because they were never alarmed.
'Til one day, sadly,
Some goons behaved badly.
Now the family's compost at a farm.

OR

There once was a family that packed.
One day, some goblins attacked.
Said Brother to Sis,
"You're too quick and don't miss!
Leave me the last one in the back!"


And just for grins...

There once was a young man named Peter
Who attempted to read a gas meter.
Because it was night,
A match he did light,
And it completely, utterly, and irrevocably destroyed forever the meter.
:evil:
 
Okay, 280 Plus, here are the first two lines for you....


There once was a preacher whose crime,
Was faking his blinding with lime.......
 
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