You know you're a mall ninja if....

Mall Ninja 4 Life


Just kidding... I think personally, I fit the Armchair Admiral characteristic more.. Getting a bit older.. Now wheres tthat naval uniform I bought at the thrift shop today

When you talk about being in "Nam" and you would have been ten years old!

When you show an Appendix scar you got a Purple Heart for.

You have a bullet hole in your shoe and walk with a limp.
Your carry gun is a model 92...pellet gun. with a disabled safety.

If you have one of these; http://www.sportsmansguide.com/net/cb/laserlyte-pistol-bayonet.aspx?a=601692&pn=1
Rmfcasey

Can't go to the airport 'cause the steel plate in your head sets off the security scanners.
Rmfcasey

It takes you 10 minutes to decide which of your carry weapons you need to draw for the occasion. [ I had a guy who worked for me that carried about 5 knives]
Rmfcasey

Ninja's; Attack!

I never laughed so hard.

Many is the time I've bought something Mil-spec but not to be a Rambo or a mall ninja. HONESTLY! No, really, ammo boxes and cold weather gear from cheaper than dirt are pretty darn useful in the frozen tundra of Vermont.

I am guilty of owning Shurikens, Katana, Wakazashi-sa, Tanto, and Bokken.
I own an extensive collection of First Person Shooters and every Bruce Lee movie, also, the holy grail of a Modern Ninja, a home-made pair of Nunchaku, even though they are NOT weapons of the true Ninjitsu arts...

I do not clutter my weapons with tons of useless crap.
I collect edged weapons for fun, not for delusions of Samurai.
I don't dress up to play soldier, at least, not anymore...
Yeah, I used to bb gun war as a kid and have paintballed/laser tagged with my kids... They actually have most of my militaria now... Their peers are soooo jealous

I know that laser is actually an acronym. You're not getting me to tell you, so go look it up yourself

I've been a special farces commando and a fully ranked Private Joker FNG for a long time, but I've never claimed to be anything I wasn't.
Which is what a true mall ninja does to dishonor himself and also the code of Bushido...

I have spoken. Ninjas; Vanish!

If you have one of these; http://www.sportsmansguide.com/net/c...?a=601692&pn=1
Rmfcasey

Click to expand...

......................................................................Engrave it! Add up to
3 initials... just $5!...and you actually spend the extra $5.00

If you try TOO hard to convince others that you are NOT a mall ninja.

You arrive to hunting camp with a polished 2010 Ford F250 Diesel w/ 6" lift, grapplers, skid plates, leather & nav, refuse to drive it "in the brush" because it might scratch, manage to shoot a decent deer (while dressed like little Lord Fontleroy) & LINE THE BED WITH HEFTY BAGS to keep from getting blood on it when transporting the game.

^ sounds like you know this person.

You think? Would not have been so bad had I not been mercilessly ridiculed for "tearing up my truck" by taking it through the brush.

You live in the city,don't hunt and this get up is in your closet.

You might be a mall ninja if....

I want the hood ornimant

I agree, the hood ornament is quality.

You wander around the gunshow wearing head-to-toe camo, that still has the store creases.

Tooltech -

It isn't the store creases.

It is because you send it to the dry cleaners every week........


isher

Back in post #50, The Pretender had a link to "Tactical Shorts". link

In the Features section it lists the advantage of "Airport-Friendly Heavy Duty Hardware"

What is Airport-Friendly Heavy Duty Hardware?

Airport-Friendly Heavy Duty Hardware

Click to expand...

I would take that to mean that it is some kind of strong plastic that they call "Heavy Duty", and since it's plastic it is airport friendly because it won't set off the metal detectors.

LMAO

You contemplate light armour for you car, because you have to drive through the "bad side" of town every now and then.

If you were kevlar underwear.

Isher said:

Tooltech -

It isn't the store creases.

It is because you send it to the dry cleaners every week........


isher

Click to expand...

Second Lt.s do?

If everything in your tactical loadout came from a Cheaper Than Dirt.

Click to expand...

If you HAVE a tactical loadout.