home defense plan

If the situation is that bad with the MIL, perhaps you need to send her a certified letter instructing her that she is persona non-grata at the home and share your concerns with the local PD. That way, if she shows up uninvited, she is automatically trespassing and they can take action.

Might be just enough to make her think twice and stay away.

Lot's of threads abounding that you can search up regarding hardening your home. Better locks and dead bolts and better outdoor lighting seem to be the usual starting places.

Interesting question, especially with the mother-in-law with mental issues. We often talk about safety with kids in the house but now you've got to worry about safety with an adult. Hard nut to crack. I think your top priority is to keep her restricted from access, even if it adds seconds to your own access.

The first thing I would do is make sure the guns were secure, s only you or your wife could get to them. A gun safe or strong metal cabinet, secured to the floor and wall. "Can be easily done by drilling some holes in the floor and walls.
It isn't meant to stop someone who has time to defeat it, but will slow them down if you are in the house from getting your guns to use against you.

Since your in Texas contact the local LEA and see if they provide home security inspections / advice. I was in a similar situation and by striking a good rapport with the officer I received a lot of helpful information above and beyond what I was looking for. In Kentucky prior to moving to Texas it was "we are not interested". God bless Texas.

The idea of the letter is to document that MIL was told "don't come here". Then if she does come, she can't say, "I didn't know" and could be subject to a trespassing charge.

This is not a restraining order.... and unless she has done something by way of an assault or threat, I think getting a restraining order is unlikely.

Yes. Most departments do security checks for businesses and homes.

I am confused as to what you are concerned about.

First absent specific threats or actions a restraining order against your M-i-L may be premature.

Protection of your home begins at the property line. Keep grass mowed, bushes trimmed, fences in good repair, good entry doors (steel clad ones are best), deadbolt locks, outside lighting, locks on the windows. As discussed your local police department should be able to make recommendations.

This may sound stupid but it isn't. If she shows up at your house does everyone know not to let her in the house? You said you are living with your F-I-L which means she is his daughter. My in-laws house sitted our house when we recently went on vacation. While we were gone my F-I-L invited his youngest son over. My Brother-in-Law is dishonest, cheats and steals from everyone including family. My wife will not invite him over anymore for family events. Yet his Dad thinks he doesn't do anything wrong. Get the picture? It's your F-I-L's house.

But you also say she wants to see your son (her Grandson). Given her mental health problems kidnapping should be a concern. How old is your son? How well supervised is he? Does he go to school? How does he go to & from school? Is he supervised when he plays outdoors? Where do he play outdoors? Is his play area fenced and gate locked? Yada, yada, yada.

A firearm should only be a very small part of your defense plan.

Does making a letter grant the same type of protection as asay a restraining order?

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That's a little beyond the scope of THR, but no. Restraining orders are court-issued and legally binding. Letters are... letters. Consider speaking with an attorney about this matter.

If there is a cast of characters in your life that might be the type to associate with the unscrupulous, prioritizing the security of your unattended firearms would be wise. For example, if it's not on you, it's locked up.

Other than that the usual rules apply. Think in terms of layers, early warning, buying time, and roles for others who are able/willing to have one.

• Lock doors and windows.

• Harden them if you can (no hollow core, for example).

• Early warning is good. Get a dog. Or an alarm–even something cheap and noisemaking off of amazon.

• Think ahead about where you would be likely to defend from. It sounds like there may be too many in the house to have a common hallway where you could get everyone behind you. So, be VERY cautious with where you might think about firing a gun in the house. American construction materials are generally concealment, not cover.

• With that many people, it's worth a warning that night time bumps could very easily be an old man going to the bathroom or someone coming/going from the house.

• Talk to the missus to work out the best role for each of you. Maybe she calls 911 while you watch the door, for example.

Buy this...you can often find it for less. For rapid deployment handgun storage, this is unquestionably one of the finest of its type. It absolutely most be bolted to the floor.

For your shotgun, they make fast-access shotgun containers but they are pricy. One low-cost option is to simply lock the gun with a device that disables it. As cable locks and trigger locks are absolutely terrible, I generally make my own. Some guns will have enough openings where a giant padlock can hook through the receiver, rendering the gun useless. I generally make a thick curved steel rod with a welded loop on each end, in which it is inserted through the action, and a pad lock attaches to. The thickness of the piece and the padlocks themselves are intentionally thicker than most bolt cutters can handle, and the way each piece sits is difficult to get leverage for cutting.

The first thing I did on my new house was reinforce the doors. The typical door has a cheap strike plate that attaches only to the door trim with two 1" screws. I replaced these with a single strike plate for the door knob and deadbolt that is secured with eight 3" screws that go into the 2x4 framing around the door.

I have motion detectors outside my house. When we lived in the city, would scare the pizza guy to open the door as he reached for the door bell.

Let's me know when the armadillos are tearing up the yard now.

In any case adding time to any defense plan almost always helps.

Most of what you need to do isn't gun related. Therefore, from a strict view of what the forum does, off topic.

Guns are the last ditch effort because everything else failed. When that becomes an accepted way of seeing things, then what you need to do up front with family and lifestyle starts to fall into place.

Keep those members of "family" who aren't trustworthy at arm's length. It won't be a failure on your part as much as other family members who defeat the plan. If they don't adopt the same line of defense then they will be the ones who undermine it.

The statistically highest risk is social - interacting with people who will aggressively act out their interests. In police statistics it shows up as a drug lord sending an execution squad to recover his merchandise because you stole it, or a wife beater recovering his manipulative girl friend using you as an escape hatch for another of her bad decisions.

Most don't actively look for those opportunities, but the social entanglements that defeat home security are still out there. A MIL with sketchy friends and family members who will open the door to them are apparently the weak links in your defense. You may have moved in with good reasons but you also accept the elevated risk.

Second, nobody discusses what kind of guns they have, and you never display them. Exercise discretion, keep them locked up and out of sight. Most gun thieves have "casers" who are socially adept at looking interested in firearms and who are smart about following up on every lead - by getting into the home thru another family member as a friend of a friend. They don't look sketchy and play well socially. Nonetheless, in most cases, the gunowner actually shows the participating thief where his guns are and what they are about six to eight weeks prior to the burglary.

Physical home security comes next, there are dozens of suggestions on how to harden the house. Again, not gun forum topical. Basically you harden up to commercial security standards - an almost windowless hurricane rated bunker. It's not a McMansionville aesthetic and gets your neighbors out of joint about ruining property values. Tread carefully.

After that, then you worry about when you grab a gun. Problem is, the BG's were already attracted, assessed the risk, and decided they could do it. Which means most internet home intrusion scenarios are a self admission of a major fail in planning and execution of what is MORE important than whatever gun is picked. There is also the choice of tactic - to stay and fight it out. That isn't necessarily the best option. How about just getting out the back and leaving with family and firearms?

Is there an escape route, and where do you meet the cops so they don't consider you the perps? Do you really want to stay and be in the crossfire with the BG's on one side shooting it out with the SWAT team on the other? Again - grabbing the gun and staying with your family hunkered down behind you directly in the backstop of bullets coming your way isn't optimal.

Prevention is the best defense.

Physical home security comes next, there are dozens of suggestions on how to harden the house. Again, not gun forum topical.

MOST DEFINITELY on topic here ... the earlier suggestion to see if the local LEA (law enforcement agency) will do a security survey/crime prevention inspection of the premises might be worth consideration.

There are a number of threads in ST&T about hardening the home...

Get a dog Or Two! Great early warning system and could really buy you time when you need it.

This may sound stupid but it isn't. If she shows up at your house does everyone know not to let her in the house? You said you are living with your F-I-L which means she is his daughter. My in-laws house sitted our house when we recently went on vacation. While we were gone my F-I-L invited his youngest son over. My Brother-in-Law is dishonest, cheats and steals from everyone including family. My wife will not invite him over anymore for family events. Yet his Dad thinks he doesn't do anything wrong. Get the picture? It's your F-I-L's house.

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This is definitely worth mulling over.

First consider how best to gather all loved ones as quickly as possible. Consider possible entry points and where an intruder might head. Carry at home since you never know when something could happen.

My wife and I have an agreed upon series of actions to take if an intruder is suspected at night.

Discuss with the family what to do for a smoke alarm, storm warning, then ask what they should do for a break in...and see what they think. Then add your suggestions. Make it a family safety and preparedness thing, not some paranoia exercise as that might not foster as good of a conversation.

If Grandpa is disabled, can he shoot? Would he want to carry?

Odds are fairly good that an intrusion will occur during the day when no one is home, though. There are a lot of easy wireless cameras available that you could set up. Make sure doors and windows are secured, too.

BSA1 said:

A firearm should only be a very small part of your defense plan.

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A firearm should be the very last item in a long list of items in your defense plan.

Absent physical threats there's not an awful lot that can be done. If threats are made and witnessed you can get an order of protection.

I went through a period of time last fall that got a little sketchy with my ex-step-father. I ended up with an order of protection against him for two years, thanks to text messages I handed over to the judge. (There was a 'family issue', and some valid, serious threats were made against my life and my family by him, and his motorcycle buddies.)

A piece of paper doesn't buy you complete peace of mind but it does shore up your legal footing if you find that you have to defend yourself.

Secure the guns you aren't personally carrying right now - that should go without saying, to keep 'em from unauthorized folks who might wonder in when you aren't around. When I leave the house the only gun that is not in a safe is on my hip as I walk out the door.

Other than that review your home security arrangements and go over stranger danger with your family. The person who is a threat may not be the one to take action against you. (Some people are predisposed or otherwise inclined to convince others to go do their dirty work for them.)

Have a plan of action and go through it - this "threat" (if it turns out to be one) is really no different than any other threat, you plan the same no matter what.

Be careful about information getting back through third parties and make sure you and your family aren't posting up on social media when you are coming and going, pictures of the house, etc.

"HEY EVERYONE LOOK I'M OUT EATING DINNER WITH THE FAMILY! HERE IS A PICTURE OF MY FOOD! AND NO ONE IS HOME!"

or...

"Life is good!" {picture of the beach} {location tagged to a different state}

^^ two of the most sure fire ways to get robbed, ever.

The rule of thumb is "if you wouldn't post what you write on a sign in your front yard for strangers to read as they drive by your home, don't post it on social medai."

If MIL warrants a restraining order, get it. Also, you may want pepper spray so that if your MIL does come and is mentally unstable, you have a less lethal option.

I'd talk to family members to let them know how they should respond to situations, and how you will be responding as well. Also, make sure you have a good flashlight! With so many people in the house make sure you ID anything that goes bump in the night.

Home defense....nothing is static! Very fluid.