Argument with an Anti about my parenting

[HGUNHNTR]

I've reached the point in my life where I have stopped trying to actively change peoples minds about an issue to which they are emotionally tied. I am very Liberal in my politics, and very pro second amendment. That combination has "won over" more people, I'm guessing, than many family arguments.

 

[sarge83]

I did thank him but I disagree with him.

 

[browneu]

Some arguments aren't worth fighting. However, in your case your father in law might cause issues with your wife if he thinks his grandkids are in danger.

Fortunately, my father in law is pro second amendment like me. We often go shooting together and show each other our new toys in the open. (Normally the family is present including the kids.)

I hope this blows over for you but my cynical side thinks that it might be something that could cause some trouble if you don't tread carefully during your next couple of visits with him.

 

[merlinfire]

I am very Liberal in my politics, and very pro second amendment. That combination has "won over" more people, I'm guessing, than many family arguments.

It's hard to change people's minds if you come from a direction they've already build defenses on. Since you don't fit the stereotype of a gun owner, you hit em where they're not expecting. Not a dig on conservative gun owners, but I do know for a fact that I have some fairly liberal friends that would not have been as comfortable with my pro-2a stance if I had fit their stereotypes. Just a fact.

If we could ever convince a generally liberal organization (that has clout) to be pro-2a, that might do more for "hearts and minds" than the NRA ever did.

 

[Arkansas Paul]

I am very Liberal in my politics, and very pro second amendment.

Holy cow! I'm not the only one!

 

[Grousefeather]

Argument

Hmmmm, I am ex AF, and PRO gun, he must have been a cook. lol.

 

[armoredman]

Ex sailor here, our guns tended to be too big to carry. As for parenting and firearms, I posted these pictures before of me and my son, and I think they say it all.







No one "unfriended" me after I posted them, and if someone does, well, they obviously weren't friends to begin with.

 

[NG VI]

I'll never talk about this again with him,

In other words, you learned a valuable lesson!

The stressed out antis, not knowing that I was "the guy", confided in me that they knew that the tarp was "so they wouldn't see" the kids "shooting animals" with "real guns".
Seriously.
They really believed that.

I've noticed that when people take a stance, political, religious, on a TV show, movie, or game, doesn't matter, that they don't actually know much about, whether or not they could quickly and painlessly learn more, they tend to believe all kinds of wild things.

Things an even slightly more informed person would be absolutely ashamed to admit believing. Also they can tend to be suspicious as all hell, usually just because that's the way the wind blows.

I wish my father had introduced me to shooting.
__________________

Me too

 

[xfyrfiter]

My younger brother is a former Marine, politically farther to the right than Atilla The Hun,not an anti in any way, but will not have anything to do with guns. so, just goes to show that you never know what makes some folks tick.

 

[Shadow 7D]

There are some who don't want to associate with guns do to traumatic or 'bad' previous personal experiences, such as loosing a friend as a child in a gun accident.

Others just hate them,
but telling them apart is hard when they are screaming at you.

 

[Hoppes Love Potion]

There's really no reason for you and your FIL to visit the topic for several years, is there? In the meantime, safe weapons handling can be gradually introduced to your kids. It can be as simple as teaching a 2-year-old to keep his toy raygun pointed in a safe direction. And of course Dad and Mom will lead by example.

 

[teumessian_fox]

I adopted a policy long ago, viz. if any family member repeatedly brings up controversial issues, it's because said family member is a troublemaker and thrives on conflict. I refuse to have contact with such defective, low life, mentally disturbed people.

It's made my life much more peaceful.

I don't know what your circumstance is, but it sounds like that's just the kind of person your FIL is. And if so, "guns" are only his method of baiting you for a fight. If you didn't have guns, it would probably be religion, or some such. Is he worth the aggravation?

 

[DammitBoy]

I have two friends who served in the military, one in the army playing with tanks, the other in the navy worked on a sub. Both are very anti-gun and neither of them were cooks.

Every other single person I know with military backgrounds have been very pro gun. Of course, most of those guys are Marines and gun nuts like me.

Semper Fi maggots!

 

[Yo Mama]

Hey all, thanksfor the support and kind words.

Sounds to me like you were attempting to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.
You say this was your father in law. Just out of curiosity, what does your spouse think about it? I mean both the issue and the argument with the father.

My Wife thought I was respectful, and rational, and agreed with my points as did her Mom.

I really feel bad about it, I should have had a saving face, and said something like whoa we were just talking a minute ago, and it seems like we are off now, your oppinion matters to me and so I'll just end this here.

Armoredman, your boy's face says it all, and I bet you that when he's older he won't remember all the tv shows he watched, but will remember Dad taking him out shooting.

Some arguments aren't worth fighting. However, in your case your father in law might cause issues with your wife if he thinks his grandkids are in danger.

Exactly my concern. We live close, and see them often. I aknowledge that when my kids do something that shows interest in my passion that I tend to be overjoyed. When I ask my kid what she wants for Christmas, and she says a pink rifle, my heart palpitates.

It doesn't mean I'm going to give my four year old a box of ammo, the rifle, and say hey good luck to you.

I'll probably call him tonight to make sure he's ok.

I wish my father had introduced me to shooting.

Not saying your situation is mine, but my dad left when I was 5. Haven't seen him since. Even lives in the same town. I found a few good father figures who were patient with me and taught me.

When I was married, and then had kids, I swore I'd never leave them, and always be a good Dad. I think I've done well, and my family is my life.

 

[CZguy]

Never wrestle with a pig - you both get dirty and the pig likes it.

Toforo,

Sounds like you grew up on a farm too.

 

[jeepmor]

I can say one thing, you best not have one of your young'ns cut a finger badly, you'll never hear the end of it. Beyond that, I share your position, not his.

 

[Larry E]

Arguing with the in laws or any other relatives about most anything is pretty much pointless. If they want to argue they'll find something to argue about, I just smile and find someone else to talk to. If they think that I'm what they'll find under a horse's tail, that's fine with me and they're not the only ones who think so.

My step son just retired from the AF, and nearly had a kitten when I mentioned I'd gotten an AR. He owns guns, and has hunted although his wife doesn't approve. Didn't ask why he had the attitude because I didn't want to start an argument, and really don't care either.

My nephew who's done at least a couple of tours in Iraq has owned a gun since he was 8 or 9, and likes to shoot.

No accounting for some people's attitudes, and not much use trying to change them usually. I just try to stay away from people who are disagreeable, and since I can be as disagreeable as anyone they're usually happy I stay away.

 

[THE DARK KNIGHT]

I'm not sure why so many people are so surprised that there are anti-gun veterans out there? There are plenty of cops, veterans, etc. out there who are anti gun. Being in the military or law enforcement doesn't simply make someone pro gun. I know plenty of anti gun cops, veterans, you name it. Guys who come out the Army and think only a trained soldier can handle a gun properly and no one else should have them.

 

[robmkivseries70]

Forum Surfer........I didn't even know how to respond.

Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...............

Best,
Rob

 

[Onmilo]

Why are you argueing with this person?
YOU are the parent, YOU make the rules and decisions for YOUR children.
When your kids are out of your house they can decide how they wish to approach the rest of their lives.

 

[MoyockDiesel]

Got my first "real" knife from my Grandpa when I was 8...lockblade Ka-Bar 5" blade...my Brother and close cousin got them too. My Mom nearly flipped out, but she dared not go against the patriarch of the family...what he said went....period. I still have to this day...come to think of it I might break out the Never Dull and polish it up. Still in the original leather case with Union Workman Chewing tobacco stamped into the leather...gotta love it. I gave my Son his first knife when he was just a Bear cub scout...Scouting Ole Timer...which he also still has...needless to say his Momma didn't say a word. I think you're doing a fine job. Retired U.S. Navy

 

[whalerman]

I read this board all the time to learn from the wisdom of others. The post by Patriotme is on the money. Some people are always willing to let others carry the load. Liberty isn't free.

 

[hey_poolboy]

I was so little when I got my first pocket knife I don't even remember. It was quite certainly under the age of eight. My Grandfather got me my first .22 rifle at the age or 8 or 9.

When the weather gets a little warmer I plan to take my girls out to shoot that .22 rifle a little bit. They are 5 and 7 years old, and love to sit with me on the back porch and shoot the BB gun. They have both shot a .22 before, but I want to take every opportunity to get them around guns and other responsible gun owners and learn proper safety and courtesy. Fortunately for me my in-laws are fine with it all.

 

[Manco]

My dad (who passed on years ago), two uncles on my mother's side, and two uncles by marriage served in the military (all infantry), but out of them only my dad owned any guns privately, although he didn't seem any more interested in guns than the others. There was no ammo in the house, and he never shot them. And he'd never talk about guns (much less allow me to handle or, heaven forbid, shoot his) except to bad-mouth the M16 (probably well deserved back in the day) and praise the AK-47 (giving it an almost mythical status, swearing that it could chamber and accurately shoot almost any rifle caliber), although he seemed pretty fond of his M1 carbine and his two pistols (a 1911 and a PPK) as collector's pieces.

I'm the only real "gun nut" in my entire extended family (except my mom, sort of), and I know a lot more about them than my dad, rest his soul, but I knew better than to argue with him over it. Yes, I tried once or twice upon a time, but he didn't think that any mere civilian could possibly know anything about guns. I would guess that this was a reflection of the view shared by all of the members of my family who have served, that guns are instruments of warfare (and I suppose law enforcement) with little or no applicability to civilian life. I, of course, beg to differ...but silently.

 

[BLACKHAWKNJ]

"20 years military" doesn't mean anything, too many military people are just glorified clerks and desk jockeys, they enlisted because they couldn't find a civilian job with the same pay and benefits and they couldn't find a government job either. Not al that conscientious, either, IMHO. The same goes for too many LEOs. The Army I served in (1967-1971) was not really a gun friendly place, except perhaps in SE Asia where it couldn't be avoided, and it's gotten worse since then.
I am not a parent nor do I portray one on the Internet, several parents I have known with similar situations have made it clear to in laws that they will raise their kids the way THEY see fit and if the grandparents-or anyone else-doesn't like, their options are to 1. Accept it and get over it or 2. Take over raising the kids themselves. Family is important, grandparents and especially grandfathers are wonderful things-I missed out on both of mine-but you don't let them run your life for you.