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FireQuest Exotic 12 Gauge ammo - Mall Ninja Alert!

Discussion in 'Shotguns' started by Navy_Guns, Oct 16, 2007.

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  1. Navy_Guns

    Navy_Guns Member

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    http://www.firequest.com/catalog/showcase_item_4.html

    You HAVE to check out this site - They sent me a catalog in the mail and the descriptions of their "Exotic" 12 gauge ammo has me seriously cracking up... I think whoever wrote these must have been the head Mall Ninja.

    12 GA. Terminator-X
    The lethality contained within the hollow core slug of our terminator 12 GA. almost can't be advertised. Upon impact, This slug mushrooms and expands to nearly 2 inches, stopping the slug from totally penetrating your objective. This rapid expansion forces the dozen of tiny pellets to spread through your objective like a cancerous disease, opening an area at the impact point equal to a softball! The cavity created has the shock effect of 95%! That means only 5% of any living being could survive this kind of hit.2 3/4 round. $14.99 for 3 rounds.

    Cancerous disease? Holy crap - last I checked it can take months to die from cancer. I'd hope my 12 gauge would be more effective than that...

    12 GA. Flechette Shot Shells
    A Flechette is a small dart shaped projectile, that is clustered in an explosive warhead, dropped in a missile from an airplane or fired from a hand held weapon. One unique application of this 1 1/2" Flechette was to load these in a 12 GA. shotgun for taking out snipers hiding in thick brush or trees. Due to the penetration of these projectiles, tree limbs and brush would not disperse the darts. Even if some were dispersed, this would still have an all-covering pattern within a tree or brush. Generally 20 of these darts are placed in each 12 GA. shell. Also known as "Satan's Toothpicks" $16.99 for 3 rounds.

    If you are a sniper and you suck so bad that a Mall Ninja toting a 12 gauge loaded up with this crap can sneak up on you and shoot you, you deserve to die...

    12 GA. "Piranha"
    This 12 gauge round contains dozens of razor sharp steel tacks that blast out at high velocity which virtually guarantees that there will no response from the perpetrator. Each round is buffed with #12 shot thus creating a double shock to the wound area. Absolutely will not harm your shotgun. To be used no closer than 10 feet and no further than 50 feet. $14.99 for 3 rounds.

    "Excuse me Mister Perpetrator, but the instructions on my "Piranha" bullets says you can't be any closer than 10 feet, so would you mind backing up into "double shock to the wound area" range?...
     
  2. Anteater1717

    Anteater1717 Member

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    Yet none of them work nearly as well as double ought.
     
  3. trueblue1776

    trueblue1776 Member

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    And it appears they were named by an elderly Chinese woman.
     
  4. Okiecruffler

    Okiecruffler Member

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    OMG, that was the funniest thing I've read all week.
     
  5. sm

    sm member

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    :scrutiny:

    Not sure a Hickory Axe handle "upside da head" would knock any sense into folks that are Figments of Imaginations and Have Marketing Degrees from Horse-Manure University.

    I'm willing to volunteer , all in the name of Research of course.

    Use Enough Axe Handle.
     
  6. 41magsnub

    41magsnub Member

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    I want to try the confetti ammo! I wonder how many rounds I could get off over a parade before the cops shoot me?
     
  7. 41magsnub

    41magsnub Member

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  8. Jorg Nysgerrig

    Jorg Nysgerrig Member

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    Blah, just another site selling the same novelty crap that's been floating around for years.

    I am curious to pattern the "Rhodesian Jungle" stuff, but not curious enough to spend $5+ a shell.
     
  9. alucard0822

    alucard0822 Member

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    The flame thrower and bird bomb rounds are high priced fun, but glad I tried them in a broken NEF 12ga probably worth less than the shells, the flame thrower rounds throw about a 20' fireball that is probably powdered magnesium, definitely not safe for your barrel.

    And the revenge in a bottle, I think they are a collection of tapwater from various mexican bars.:evil:
     
  10. Dope

    Dope Member

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    *gets on phone and starts ordering*

    Dope
     
  11. PercyShelley

    PercyShelley Member

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    They have confetti rounds.

    Is it tactical confetti?

    (that means the confetti is black)
     
  12. kurtmax

    kurtmax Member

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    Wow... just wow. Since when has 00 buck not been good at killing things? I'd also think that flechettes would get deflected more than shot/bullets by bushes since they could be knocked off balance easier.
     
  13. 2RCO

    2RCO Member

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    I wouldn't suggest confetti ammo for HD.
     
  14. Okiecruffler

    Okiecruffler Member

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  15. Cougfan2

    Cougfan2 Member

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    Navy Guns, thanks! This gave me a good laugh this morning!
     
  16. trueblue1776

    trueblue1776 Member

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    They also have SS109 for a buck a piece, advertised as AP, of course.
    http://www.firequest.com/catalog/223Armor_MoreInfo.html
    This site is the most retarded funny thing I've seen in a while.

    So Magnesium's atomic number is 12? SA-WEET!
     
  17. Navy_Guns

    Navy_Guns Member

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    kurtmax - Oh, but they DO sell 00 shells, except they call them...

    12 Gauge "Triple Decker"
    These 12 gauge shells are loaded with nine large bead balls (three sets of three) stacked on top of each other. They pack a punch EXTREMELY heavier than the standard 12 gauge and the results are exciting to see, hear, feel and completely devastating. If impact is what you want, then the Triple Decker is what you need. Comes three shells to a package. 23/4 round

    Price, only $16.99 for three shells!

    Good to know that the results are exciting to feel... I bet I'd be excited about getting shot with 00 buck, er... "Triple Decker".
     
  18. JG2000

    JG2000 Member

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    So what do they recommend for Dove? I'm thinking the Fireball or the Confetti. My poor hunting buddies have no idea what there in for :)
     
  19. foghornl

    foghornl Member

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    Novelty Rounds like these are exactly that...Novelties, with no serious purpose. {Although I do remember a thread here from "Preacherman" about a home invasion stopped with a 'Dragons Breath' round}

    Fun? ? Oh yeah....but no real serious use, except perhaps the "Screamers" and "Bird Bombs" for pest clearance from runways, maybe.
     
  20. CWL

    CWL Member

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    Gotta bookmark this site for future laughs.

    Just looked in the "survival items", they're selling Doans magnesium starters (mebbe $5) ON SALE for $17.99 from regular price of $24.99!
     
  21. sm

    sm member

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    If you build it, they will buy it. - anon

    Novelty Stuff has been around forever.
    Old magazines going way way back, had Ammunition, along with Snake Oil for guns, cars, health and beauty.

    Do a Internet Search, better yet hit the local Library and if they have Microfiche still - look these old publications up.

    They had Recoil Reducing Stocks, Aiming devices for Shotguns, Novelty Ammo/Exotic Ammo, even Ammo left by Aliens that would work in your shotguns.

    Oils and Oil supplements, Gasoline enhancers, Gave Saving devices.

    We got to figuring one day, we would have to pull over about every 50 miles and siphon OUT gas,otherwise gas would be spilling out of the gas tank going down the road.
    Spark Plugs, Plug wires, Points, Condensers, Carb dealie, exhaust dealie, oil and gas enhancers...
    I mean one would get a 500% gas savings if they bought all this stuff and used it. :D

    Some of the Ammo, really ruined guns and hurt folks.
    Some of the Recoil Reducers messed up guns, and folks too.

    One fella, thank goodness, mounted the gun in a tire, and used cord to slap trigger on some Novelty Shotgun shells. Blew the gun up!
    It looked like a grenade had gone off!

    Then his Grandpa and Daddy tore him a new one. It was the Pet Model 12 Police Gun he blew up!

    Remember the pressures in a shotgun are akin to that of a Grenade.



    One cannot buy skill and targets - me
     
  22. Cosmoline

    Cosmoline Member

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    That's priceless! It reminds me of "Spinal Tap" where the rocker doesn't want his prized guitar even FILMED because it's too potent.
     
  23. The Deer Hunter

    The Deer Hunter Member

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    When you read the description, not only does it say a blinding flash and extreme report comes out of your gun but it also says that the most elite around the globe use it. What it doesn't say is if these few "elite" wear ear muffs and those wicked thick sunglasses.

    If its going to blind the intruder/enemy, its going to blind you too because its about 2 feet away from your face.
     
  24. Stillwater97

    Stillwater97 Member

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    12 Gauge "Rhodesian Jungle"
    The Rhodesian Jungle rounds are great for in home defense! The combination of several large pellets surrounded by a mass of smaller pellets allows for double punching power to any intruder that is unlucky enough to cross it’s path. Make the intruder think twice with this double whammer power. If the big pellets don’t get you, the small ones will. 23/4 round

    What exactly is "double whammer power"?
     
  25. PercyShelley

    PercyShelley Member

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    I think it's some sort of cheeseburger.
     
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