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Need To Get Something Off My Chest...

Discussion in 'General Gun Discussions' started by Ohio Rifleman, Aug 6, 2007.

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  1. MT GUNNY

    MT GUNNY Member

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    I dout AGOUTIs father has a saftey issue with his son, cuz he already has a SKS which can be very dangerous in its self..
     
  2. boredelmo

    boredelmo member

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    Maybe you're a bit sensitive? Sounds like if he was chuckling it was in a light humorous way.

    My dad sometimes think I'm a bit paranoid when i cc in the house (I'm 19 and at the parents house for the summer). He thinks he's safe enough and that nothing would really happen. And if something did, he would take care of it.

    Example story: Loud pounding at door at midnight. We werent expecting any company, i asked firmly who was at the door. No response but extra pounding. I ran upstairs to grab the sig, while doing that my dad went and opened the door. He laughed at me grabbing a gun since it turned out to be one of his friends that needed a place to crash. But i didnt like the situation and how my dad just opened the door. He said if i felt so threatened, why didnt i just wake him up? I told him im more afraid of a grumpy dad than the meanest burglar.

    My dad is gone 6 months out of the year and while hes gone, my mom really appreciates me CC'ing.


    So no matter how much my dad scoffs at my paranoia, i don't mind, I'll keep this house as safe as possible within my power.
     
  3. Neophyte1

    Neophyte1 Member

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    G21

    I agree with you whole-heartily: Seeing our Children Growing until grown;
    wow. How does the old saying go.
    Something Like;
    my child remain my child no matter how old I become.
    My Son My Son I see you as the day you were born.
    My Son we are your parents: Our concerns are forever.
    We didn't bring you into this World to Bury you,
    So stand behind me and let me be the first to go.

    I had to paraphrase: CRS club

    Ohio Rifleman: Be patient with your Father, his concerns are for-ever
    Should my little bit of mess mean something to you; you'll understand that your Father loves you.
    He hasn't Kicked you out of the House. You appear to respect, only frustrated with his opinion and decision. Let it go, The next time you see him remember;
    This is the first day of the rest of our Lives.
    Forget not; to tell him that YOU love him.
    One day you will not have the opportunity.
    Tomorrow is a new day.
     
  4. Henry Bowman

    Henry Bowman Senior Member

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    I understand that. But he may not want you taking a lead on home defense. There could be many reasons why. Some valid, some not. The validity of some will depend on the partriculars. He knows you well and for some reason isn't comfortable with the idea of you seeing yourself in or taking on the role of HD.

    You could ask him his reasons. Be willing not to take offense if it involves him not seeing you as being as mature as you see yourself. If it involves training, maybe he will be willing to instruct. More likely, you will need to show that you take it seriously and are willing to get sound training (on your own). I'd recommend tdiohio.com. It is close by, not cheap, but very professional.

    If he doubts your maturity (and is honest enough to say so to his son), remember that humility is an easily-recognized sign of maturity. I don't know you. I'm not saying you're immature. I'm just saying you're young. Nothing to be ashamed of there. He may be aware of some less than mature behavior that happened only 2 or three years ago. That will change. Likewise, when you are his age, "2 or 3 years ago" will seem like yesterday.

    Sorry to sound like an old fart (I'm only 45 and consider that "relatively young"). Still, our opinion doesn't count. His does.
     
  5. Ohio Rifleman

    Ohio Rifleman Member

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    I already personally own three guns, and my dad's taught me pretty much everything I know about guns and gun handling and maintainence. It seems that me using those guns for anything other than punching paper seems to bother him a bit.
     
  6. Hoppy590

    Hoppy590 Member

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    my fathers the same way. he wants me to clear any purchases with him, and doesnt want me to CCW. his logic "my house my rules" thats fine, when it comes to who gets the last slice of pizza, who picks what mel brooks movie, or how late/loud i can have the tv on then yes, thats fair. that "logic" should not even be considered int he exercising of my constitutional rights. officialy iv only cleared 2 of my purchases through him. and one of them was post fact. he knows about most of my collection. and obviously seems upset about it. but i dont care.

    he also demanded keys to my cabinet. using the same "my house my rules " logic
    i countered asking what he could possibly need access to my gear for.

    Defense, he said theres no reason hed need to use my stuff, at the time, he had better, pistols etc.
    Sport, he said theres no reason hed need to use my stuff, at the time he had better sport gear.

    which brings me to the only logical conclusion i can think of. distrust. he would only need a key to remove my arms incase he thought i wasnt responsible.

    iv never given him any reason to believe that... oh well. hopefully out of here soon enough
     
  7. Trebor

    Trebor Member

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    Suck it up. His house, his rules and all that.

    When your out on your own it won't make as much difference what your dad thinks of your lifestyle.

    Just don't make this one of those arguments that sours your relationship for years. You don't have to be "right" or convince him of anything, Just let it go, suck it up, and do what you want when you move out.
     
  8. Ohio Rifleman

    Ohio Rifleman Member

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    The "his house, his rules" thing doesn't really apply here because I have not been expressly forbidden from doing anything. Let me repeat that...


    MY DAD HAS NOT FORBIDDEN ME FROM DOING ANYTHING
     
  9. jt1

    jt1 Member

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    Ohio Rifleman - Let it go, do what you want to do, and be happy he's still around to give you a hard time!
     
  10. cassandrasdaddy

    cassandrasdaddy Member

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    that is why i left home young. then it became my house my rules. i didn't try to have it both ways
     
  11. ftierson

    ftierson Member.

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    What jt1 says...

    :)

    Forrest
     
  12. Henry Bowman

    Henry Bowman Senior Member

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    Then what are you complaining about? He chuckled at you? I guess we all missed the point.
     
  13. Ohio Rifleman

    Ohio Rifleman Member

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    Thanks for the responses, all. We do live in a very nice town/neighborhood, but, as we all know, things do still happen. I'm in no hurry to buy a shotgun. Actually, I was hoping my next firearm purchase would be a handgun I could realistically use for CCW. As my dad pointed out, it is a tremendous responsibility to carry a gun. But then again, so is driving a car. In either situation, a moments inattentiveness could get yourself or someone else killed.

    I interpreted that as sort of saying that my concerns were invalid, and that I should depend on him for protection/defense. I thoroughly despise depending on others for anything, so that's why the thought of getting a shotgun/CCW appeals to me. I'm responsible for myself.
     
  14. Henry Bowman

    Henry Bowman Senior Member

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    Correct you are. Carry on and keep safe.
     
  15. ArfinGreebly

    ArfinGreebly Moderator Emeritus

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    Chip Off The Old Block

    It's only natural for a young man to look up to his father and try to learn the skills that his father has.

    Dad, sooner or later I'm going to have to take care of things like this myself. You've always done well with it, and I'd rather learn from you than someone else.

    I know it's early for a sidearm, but I'm sure you can give me the guidance I need in selecting and learning to use the long arms.

    I'd appreciate learning from someone I trust. How can we arrange this?

    Could be he'd rather have you learn from "someone who's trained" rather than some fool stranger down at the range.

    You can tell him what you plan, or you can ask him how the plan should go.

    More wisdom comes from asking than telling.

    At least, it seems that way to me.
     
  16. EdLaver

    EdLaver Member

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    Not to be rude to you Ohio, but like some of the other posters have mentioned. If you live at your fathers house then you must simply abide by his rules out of respect of him being your father. If you do not want to abide then you should leave and have your own place of residence and make your own rules.

    I personally think that he is wise about what he has asked of you. If in any case there is a home invasion he doesnt want two, (you and him) possibly three (the intruder or maybe more) to be blasting away and someone getting caught in a incidental crossfire. Makes sense to me, but it took me until I was 23 to mature and understand alot of things my dad told me at a younger age. I tell you what, my relationship with my father is bulletproof now because I respect all the things he told me, even when I was young and bull-headed.
     
  17. Hoppy590

    Hoppy590 Member

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    apply that to any other tyranical situation. replace Father with country and see how much it makes sense. whether its the BATFE or your Dad. there are some things you should argue when no logical arguement is given.

    ( not saying anyones right or wrong. i just ask people to think about this)
     
  18. koja48

    koja48 member

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    That is DEFINITELY worth repeating . . . it's a "Dad" thing. And don't let this turn into an argument or deteriorate what sounds like a great relationship. I had similar feelings when my Son wanted to move out on his own . . . Dads are "protectors." This, too will pass. I wish my Dad were still here -- I'd relish the occasional difference of opinion.
     
  19. Ohio Rifleman

    Ohio Rifleman Member

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    I'm not taking this personally, and maybe some of you all are right, and I'm just making a mountain out of a molehill. My folks, especially my dad, are always telling me how I'm much more mature and trustworthy than a lot of other people my age. And, if they trust me with that 2-ton weapon I have sitting outside (car) then guns should be no problem.
     
  20. DavidVS

    DavidVS Member

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    Maybe he is thinking that after dealing with an armed criminal in the home apologizing to the woman of the house about the holes in the walls and furniture , and the blood on the floor, are things he would rather do than have you attempt...
    :)
     
  21. Bopleo

    Bopleo Member

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    Move out and get whatever the hell you want.

    How hard can this be?????
     
  22. sgratra

    sgratra Member

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    Thread ended at post 39 - why am I posting? :)

    This thread effectively ended at post 39. For what it's worth:

    Your dad has probably seen more than his fair share while on the force for 17 years. Put another way; YOU DON'T HAVE HIS EXPERIENCE. Who cares about his stances or views. He is worried about you staying alive; I know that sounds counter intuitive, but when you introduce a firearm for more than sport; you clearly jump to a new level of responsibility.

    Decisions have to be made on the fly, while considering every minute detail; from personal safety, to the safety of the public, to legal use of the force continuum; just to name a few. blah blah blah

    Just out of curiosity, why aren't you following footsteps and joining the force yourself?

    And no your not ready- PERIOD. Your closer than most though, myself included.
     
  23. TCB in TN

    TCB in TN Member

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    +1 and I never understood it till I had my own kids. That said dad trained me to take care of myself and the house if he was away, and I have been doing the same with my kids. (My 14 year old knows what to do IF I am away, or if at home and something happens to me).
     
  24. jefnvk

    jefnvk Member

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    Not to sound like an ass, but I got one last thign to say. If your father hasn't forbidden you to do anything, and you can do it/feel you need to do it, then by all means go ahead and do it.

    However, your argument sounds like mine the past few years have been. You don't like something your dad said, and will complain and moan to anyone that will listen, hoping for agreement from us that you are right, and you father is wrong.

    Believe me, I spent the past few years doing that. A while back, right about the time I really started cutting ties and drowning in the debt of living off on my own, I realized that those years, I was wrong, dad was right all along. Just because you hit the age the gov't has set for adulthood, doesn't mean you know quite everything. You may think you do, but sometime in the next few months or years, the same realization will hit you. Everything will become much clearer as to why it was done. Maybe one day, you'll even thank him.
     
  25. Hoppy590

    Hoppy590 Member

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    then when is he ready? when his dad says hes ready? :scrutiny:

    we all know depending on some one else is a loosing proposition. and all the fathers here have already stated no matter how old you are, or how much experience you have. your still a kid to the. so by default, if we all waited till our fathers or others older than us approved we would all be old and gray before we could CCW.

    whos to decide when im ready? my father, who as stated by other fathers, will always see me as a kid?

    myself? cause i already decided im ready to start this up. more courses, more range time. if it was up to my father i wouldnt.

    the state? cause iv already jumped through more hoops in 4 years than most of you will in a life time, just to own guns. iv been approved by a draconian state to own guns, twice, including a Class A license.

    Ohio doesnt seem to take this personaly, but i certainly do. iv busted my butt and fully know that even so much as talking trash in a bar, completly un armed, no physical conflict, puts my CCW at great risk. iv never been in a fight and having never weighed more than 130lbs in my life. know damn well to commit to avoidance and deescalation

    /rant
     
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