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Osama and Whitney, Sittin' In A Tree

Discussion in 'Legal' started by mike101, Aug 23, 2006.

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  1. mike101

    mike101 Member

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    I suppose most of us saw on the news, yesterday, that Bin Laden has the hots for Whitney Houston, and would like to have her husband, Bobby Brown killed.

    If this information can leak out, how is it we can't find this guy?

    I think, maybe, it's time to get our people out of Iraq, and invade Pakistan. The Pakistanis are not our friends, and I don't trust Musharef as far as I can throw him.
     
  2. Biker

    Biker Member

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    Whaaaaat!? :scrutiny:

    Biker
     
  3. mike101

    mike101 Member

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    I'm serious. It was all over the news yesterday. Local and national. Bin Laden thinks she is the most beautiful woman in the world. I guess he doesn't have any recent pictures of her.:what:
     
  4. JohnBT

    JohnBT Member

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    And I thought I kept up with the news. I wonder if he would use a handgun or a rocket to take out her husband? If a handgun, what brand? John

    Boston Herald:

    "The bizarre revelations are contained in a new autobiography by Kola Boof, 37, a Sudanese poet and novelist who claims to have been bin Laden’s sex slave. “Diary of a Lost Girl” is excerpted in the September Harper’s maggie.

    Boof, who wrote for the soap opera “Days of Our Lives” until she was fired last month, said bin Laden was obsessed with Houston and wanted to give the Grammy winner a mansion in Khartoum.

    “He explained to me that to possess Whitney, he would be willing to break his color rule and make her one of his wives,” Boof writes. “He would say how beautiful she is, what a nice smile she has, how truly Islamic she is but is just brainwashed by American culture and by her husband, Bobby Brown.” "
     
  5. mike101

    mike101 Member

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    Rocket or Handgun?

    I don't think he'd use either. He seems pretty partial to AK-47's. If he wants to use a handgun, I might be willing to lend him one of mine!;)
     
  6. Biker

    Biker Member

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    That's just plain weird.

    Biker
     
  7. mike101

    mike101 Member

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    It IS weird. But that Osama, he has some pretty weird ideas about a lot of things.

    Maybe we could sneak Whitney over the Afghan-Pakistani border and give her a bullhorn. If she belted out "I Will Always Love You", she might be able to coax him out of his cave.:D
     
  8. USMCRotrHed

    USMCRotrHed Member

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    Outside of Tony Blair and Israel, Musharef is probably our strongest ally in the Global War on Terrorism. His political trouble is that he has to walk a very fine line in order to stay as president. Trust him or not, he is giving us results and following it up with results and arrests of conspiritors in many of the plots that have been uncovered. I don't trust the Pakistanis either, but Musharef...I'm glad he's in charge over there.

    As far as Whitney is concerned.....That news only verifies that Bin Laden is certifiably crazy
     
  9. Biker

    Biker Member

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    I dunno...the way she's lookin' nowadays, a burka might be a damn good idea.

    Biker
     
  10. orionengnr

    orionengnr Member

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    Turn her over to him.

    "it's for the children..."
     
  11. Roadwild17

    Roadwild17 Member

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    What, the NSA & CIA havent thought of bugging her with a gps tracker and leting her go roam the mountians :what:

    Just a ? the AK that Ossima alwas has bedhing him; 47, 74, or M ?
     
  12. CTD99

    CTD99 Member

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    Bobby Brown might want to have a word with Osama, but he might be busy snorting stuff or beating on Witney to stop and talk.

    Witney was the best singer I have ever heard. What a voice! What a waste of talent!
     
  13. mike101

    mike101 Member

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    You know, Osama better watch out. Bobby probably has more guns than he does.:D
     
  14. gregthehand

    gregthehand Member

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    I just have to wonder how true the claims are. We are a culture obsessed with stars. I'm sure making these claims has boltered this woman's bank account considering she did just get fired from Days of Our Lives. Makes me kind of wonder when we take the word of some drama writer as truth about some crazy guy's feelings!
     
  15. ConstitutionCowboy

    ConstitutionCowboy member

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    B - O - N - G - I - N - G!

    Sorry, it just seemed to fit.

    Well, there is one way to find out how hot he is for her. Clean her up and schedule a concert for Kaboul. When he hits Ticketron, we got him!

    That said, this might be serious. Hell, the guy blew up two of our tallest buildings. I'm sure his sexual proclivities are no less compelling to him.

    Woody

    Look at your rights and freedoms as what would be required to survive and be free as if there were no government. If that doesn't convince you to take a stand and protect your inalienable rights and freedoms, nothing will. I'll bet Bobby Brown wishes he had!
     
  16. Sawdust

    Sawdust Member

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    :rolleyes:

    IBTL

    Sawdust
     
  17. longeyes

    longeyes member

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    They'd make a beautiful couple.

    How many prisoners can we trade her for?

    Can we throw in Bobby for a sweetener?
     
  18. Sergeant Bob

    Sergeant Bob Member

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    Some people will say anything to sell a book.
     
  19. Deanimator

    Deanimator Member

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    I was really upset when I heard that on Fox News yesterday. The last thing I need first thing in the morning is to have my opinion of bin Laded raised...
     
  20. longeyes

    longeyes member

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    He'd also like to convert Jenna Jameson, I'll bet.

    So much impurity, so little time...
     
  21. Sistema1927

    Sistema1927 Member

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    This sounds like something from The Onion.
     
  22. coltrane679

    coltrane679 Member

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    Yeah, this is all very funny, but somehow it's pathetic that Americans only successful response to this mass murderer are bad jokes--is that suppose to obscure our relative impotence regarding this SOB? Five years on he is still alive while 3000+ are dust in a landfill.

    Next week the National Geographic Channel premieres a show called "Osama's Escape". Haven't seen it, but it sounds interesting:

    http://www.thejournalnews.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20060727/LIFESTYLE01/607270372/1031
     
  23. 50caliber123

    50caliber123 Member

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    Bin Laden's personel weapon appears to be an AKS-74U, the ultra-compact version of the AK-74. It always appears in his videos with him, and for some reason, it has to be symbolic, he has a 45rd magazine in the weapon propped against the wall during his videos
     
  24. Marshall

    Marshall Member

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    Whitney Houston = Bait.
     
  25. WayneConrad

    WayneConrad Member

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    Well, ya know...

    I get all my important information from people who write fantasy for a living.
     
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