That said, I shoot .357 with no problem, so I maybe I'm just an idiot.
Interesting. Do you have to change recoil springs or anything?I have actually loaded and shot .45 Minor for IDPA ESP. My preferred load is a 200 gr bullet at 660 fps to give the same power factor as 9mm econo-ball 115 at 1150.
That .45 load has a less sharp FELT recoil than that 9mm, even though the computed recoil will be the same for same weight guns. However, I have also shot a lot of 9mm subsonic, 147 at 900 for the same power factor and it is also more comfortable to shoot than the light fast bullet.
To summarize, recoil in the same weight gun with the same power factor ammunition:
.45/200 = 9mm/147 < 9mm/115
At least to my perceptions. I am not exactly in The Princess and The Pea league and a lot of people see differences where I find none. Also, it matters how you are shooting. A lot of the differences are masked by adrenaline if you are shooting fast in competition like IDPA or IPSC.