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Santa has a CCW (xmas story)

Discussion in 'General Gun Discussions' started by Berg, Dec 21, 2006.

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  1. Berg

    Berg Member

    May 5, 2005
    Where the 92 meets the 101
    Yes it's that time of year again to haul this one out....

    'Twas the night before Christmas, cold, dark and foreboding,
    As I sat at the workbench, quite busy reloading
    The empties from autumn were polished so clear
    For primers and powder, and bullets from Speer
    And Sierra boat-tails, and Nosler's Partitions
    (My bench ain't no place for brand name omissions!)
    All sat in their boxes, right next to the press
    With dies from Midway, and RCBS

    When all of a sudden there came such a jolt,
    I grabbed for my Mossberg, and whipped out my Colt.
    As I spilled Hodgdon's powder all over the shelf
    I scrambled for cover, just to protect myself
    From up on the rooftop, came hoofbeats and snorting
    Like the noise out of L'il Rock, from Clinton's cavorting!
    I eased off the safety, to press-check my auto
    With 230-hardball, I'd knock 'em all blotto

    Were these rogue federal agents, sent by Schumer and Hillary?
    Or a staggering Ted Kennedy, reaking of distillery?
    My question was answered with a knock, and some sneezing,
    "It's Santa, you moron, lemme in there, I'm freezing!"
    I flipped off the dead-bolt and threw the door open wide,
    To find St. Nick a'shivering, Rudolph by his side
    He eyeballed my Commander, with a nod of approval
    "You're all set," he said, "for dirtball removal."
    "But this 'tis no raid, we're not here to harm you
    Or persecute, prosecute, or even disarm you"
    Instead, said dear Santa, he needed to borrow
    My .357, 'till day after 'morrow"

    It's okay," he assured me, with a hint of frustration.
    "I'm enrolled in the National Rifle Association"
    He showed me his card, 'twas a Life Member rating
    "I've had this since me and the missus were dating!"
    "And you see, John ol' buddy, I've gotten real nervous
    Since Feinstein was elected, with a promise to serve us"
    So henceforth as I'm out there, my presents a'stackin'
    "I want to assure you, I'm legally packin'"
    "And my gift for you this year, should give you a hoot
    "I've told the Supreme Court to give Brady the boot!
    Now, Rudolph and I must be on our way"
    He said, as he climbed back on the seat of his sleigh

    With the reins in his hand, and my Smith in his pocket
    He jingled the sleighbells and was off like a rocket
    With a pair of speedloaders, and ammo to spare
    I knew he'd be safe, he was loaded for bear
    As he faded from view, I could still hear him calling
    "From D.C., where 'P.C.' is already falling
    "To bad guys in L.A., Detroit and Atlanta:
    I'm licensed to carry. Don't be messin' with Santa!"

  2. ArfinGreebly

    ArfinGreebly Moderator Emeritus

    Oct 10, 2006
    North Idaho

    Brings a tear.

    "God bless us, every one!"
  3. DoubleTapDrew

    DoubleTapDrew Member

    Feb 23, 2006
    Haha that's awesome!
    If I had his job I'd definitely be packin!
  4. hockeybum

    hockeybum Member

    Nov 26, 2006
    the second picture is now my background. what a good way to get into the christmas spirit :evil:
  5. f4t9r

    f4t9r Member

    May 27, 2005
    That was cool , I enjoyed it
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