So you want to buy your girlfriend/wife a gun

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... So I will go and give it a chance, but I don't think I'm going to like it; I don't feel confident racking the slide. I have had two semi-autos jam on me, one of them being the Glock I qualified with and yes, you really can jam a Glock. I think I have a talent for jamming semi-autos. I don't like "plastic" guns (I'm not saying they are bad; they just aren't right for me.) I think they recommended the .380 for me because I'm small, (5' 2" and 115 lbs.), female and have delicate looking hands and wrists. ...

Are you familiar with www.corneredcat.com? She has some very helpful information about racking slides.

My hands are small, but not delicate -- more like a man's hand in miniature than a normal, woman's hand. I can rack the slide on anything I've ever picked up (BTW, little pocket semi-autos are notorious for having VERY stiff springs and being hard to rack). My problem is being unable to reach the assorted controls -- especially the slide lock. I once shot an entire target match with a borrowed Colt 1911 that had to be cleared safe by the range officer (it was his gun), every time the range went cold. :what:

If your jamming issue is limp-wristing you might be able to improve it by doing wrist exercises. Get some object of weight, I use a 4lb iron mallet, but a small dumbell would be even better. Here's a picture:

wrist-exercises.jpg


I do them in 3 positions, palm up, palm down, and palm to the inside. Do them with your forearm supported on the arm of a chair to make sure that its your wrist rather than your biceps doing the work.

All that said, if you don't like shooting semi-autos you have that right. I don't like shooting revolvers myself. They feel different and different people will prefer one or the other. :)
 
Soon after I met the women who became my wife (now hitched for 32 years) I took her camping. She likes to camp and sing songs around the campfire. Fun.

I brought along my Marlin 39A, that in those days sported a scope. She said that she had never fired a gun and had never been around any and didn't want to start now. No amount of cajoling could convince her to take a shot.

So I tossed out a coke can and commensed to bouce it along. She just watched. Finally I turned the Marlin over to her, gave her some ear muffs and told her that she HAD to take a shot. She did.

After a box or two of shells she returned the rifle. She held the gun perfectly and was a fantastic shot right out of the box. She still is, and we love walking along a country trail shooting our .22 rifles at pine cones, bits of wood, pebbles, etc... She was also an excellent shotgun shot the first time she tried it. A natural shooter. Also a wonderful cook! And she makes a mean martini!
 
Thanks for the info. My long time girlfriend enjoys going to the range with me, but she doesn't like shotguns. She says she wants a gun, but I don't think she has the heart to shoot anyone. Do you have a suggestion for this?
 
You don't think she has the heart to shoot someone or she doesn't think she could do it? To me, those are 2 different things.

I was against having a gun in my home for many many years. I've even been through a few experiences that you'd think would have made me change my mind sooner - raped as a teenager, beat up by a customer. I was still against it. All for other's rights to bear arms, but not my choice and not in my house. A few years ago someone came on my property that creeped me out and the police even suggested I get a gun. I still said no - scared of it with kids in the house especially being someone never around the things. A few months ago someone tried to break in while I was home with one of the kids. I didn't even know it until I found the broken door, I still don't know what scared him off but that was finally the event that changed my mind. I got a camera that shows the side door and the driveway but I also got a gun, took a class and started going to the range every week. The whole momma bear thing kicked in and there is no doubt in my mind - I don't want to shoot anyone but I will if I have to.

First i bought a used .22 Taurus with a pop up barrel so i didnt even had a slide to deal with and practiced with that to get comfortable with a gun. In short time I upgraded to a slim .9mm. Cornered cat really helped me with the slide. When I first bought my 9mm I was distressed I bought something I found hard to shoot. The info on that site really helped and I'm completely comfortable with it now.
 
Thanks for the info. My long time girlfriend enjoys going to the range with me, but she doesn't like shotguns. She says she wants a gun, but I don't think she has the heart to shoot anyone. Do you have a suggestion for this?
If I met a women who wanted to kill someone I'd seek another. Women nurture, men fight. It is how we are wired.

Really, one has to be trained to kill a person, which is what we do in the infantry. We train people to kill other people with gusto. If a soldier kills a bunch of people we give him an medal. Today we are putting women in combat units. A big mistake IMO, and for lots of reasons.

We hope that your GF will never be in a situation were she has to consider killing someone. It's rare today. A good thing.
 
Put a woman between a danger and her children or loved ones and you find out just how dangerous that nurturer is.

The most dangerous situation you can get into (well one of them) is to be between a momma griz and her cubs.
The stupid macho 'I'm gonna blow you away' is stupid
PERIOD, doesn't matter what gender. Being able and willing to defend yourself is just that. That isn't violence it's a willingness to do what needs to be done, including violence if required. MUCH different mindset, either you can get it or you can't. No matter of talking can really change someones minds, I've seen the rambo freeze when SHTF and the quite church mouse just took over and did what was needed to be done. Who'd of thunk that?
 
Put a woman between a danger and her children or loved ones and you find out just how dangerous that nurturer is.
...

Kipling, I think, put it best.

...
Man, a bear in most relations — worm and savage otherwise, —
Man propounds negotiations, Man accepts the compromise.
Very rarely will he squarely push the logic of a fact
To its ultimate conclusion in unmitigated act.

Fear, or foolishness, impels him, ere he lay the wicked low,
To concede some form of trial even to his fiercest foe.
Mirth obscene diverts his anger — Doubt and Pity oft perplex
Him in dealing with an issue — to the scandal of The Sex!

But the Woman that God gave him, every fibre of her frame
Proves her launched for one sole issue, armed and engined for the same;
And to serve that single issue, lest the generations fail,
The female of the species must be deadlier than the male.

She who faces Death by torture for each life beneath her breast
May not deal in doubt or pity — must not swerve for fact or jest.
These be purely male diversions — not in these her honour dwells—
She the Other Law we live by, is that Law and nothing else.
...


For the whole poem, in all its politically incorrect glory, http://www.corneredcat.com/The_Female_of_the_Species/
 
If I bought a gun for any family member, it would be for my mother because she would likely be the only one who would firstly, have actually learned what to do, secondly, not have a freak out, and thirdly, actually try to inflict maximum damage upon a threat. My father is liable to get not read the instructions, get flustered, and if he were to fire, then he would most likely try to avoid inflicting lethal injuries. My brother would probably read the instructions but never practice or give up early. He would also likely panic and call for the Police or get caught up in some sort of theoretical procedure. He would probably take a defensive shooting too far and either overkill or shoot someone who is fleeing or otherwise not a threat.

If I had a girlfriend, I probably would not buy her a gun without her consent and interest. She would also need to be present so she could pick out her gun of choice.
 
Me? Buy my girlfriend a gun? :laugher:
I'm afraid you are delusional. I attract women the way that Obama attracts NRA endorsements.

Buy a gun for my mom? Let's think... I want something that she'd definitely be able to use, something that won't incapacitate her when she's shooting with a headache, and something that won't offend her antigun sensibilities. It also must be framed for a woman with rather large hands (it turns out that some of my things are too small for her), and it also must be capable of doing a 1 shot stop (and hopefully a kill for the mercy of whoever the target is). I say that I'd get her a Jericho in 357 Magnum.
 
I want to buy my husband a gun...

I have a Sig 226 and the Boy (16) has a S&W 67. Husband likes to come to the range every now and then and prefers the 67 (how can he not love my Sig???) but I want to get him one of his own. He shot a lot when he was a kid; his best friend's dad was a gun dealer of questionable repute. But it has been (eek) 25 years since then. I ask him, and he just wants parts for his '70 Mustang. :rolleyes:

On a more serious note:

First of all, there is nothing more nurturing than being protective.

Anyway, when I was looking for an auto (so I could pass the 38 special on to the kid) I was intimidated by all the levers and buttons on the pistols. I sucked it up and got ignored by many rude gun counter clerks and asked embarrassingly ignorant questions and held every 9 mm gun in three towns for months before I picked up my 226. It felt like coming home.

That's how a gun should feel to your wife/girlfriend, if you want her to go out to the range and shoot and improve and enjoy it. I don't carry but even if I did I would haul the sucker around in a tote bag. I can reach all of the controls with one hand, and the slide isn't too hard for me. I'm still struggling a little with where exactly to put one thumb, but that's a good excuse to get out to the range until I figure it out :)

I'm medium sized, medium aged, law abiding, moderately intelligent and a registered voter. I didn't hold a gun until I was 35. If I can pick out a gun, your wife or girlfriend can. She has probably absorbed WAY more information than she realizes from your babbling on the subject.
 
I'm medium sized, medium aged, law abiding, moderately intelligent and a registered voter. I didn't hold a gun until I was 35. If I can pick out a gun, your wife or girlfriend can.

I'm afraid this notion is lost on a lot of people, tbh.
 
I see more and more women carrying. I think its great! My wife had a scare in a parking lot one night, shortly after she asked me to take her gun shopping. She got her carry permit and we picked her up a Keltec P32, a little Jimenez 22 (has been 100% reliable - otherwise I wouldn't let her carry it) and a Mossberg 500C for the bedside....she shoots regularly and bought what she felt comfortable and confident with. She is rather small and has smaller hands...so recoil wasn't as much of an issue and "fit". She couldn't keep ahold of some of the subcompact / pocket pistol 380's and 9's..but the 32 loaded with hydrashock is her perfect fit. Shes accdurate with it and has practiced alot.

I would never have attempted to buy her a gun...I felt that guns are the most effective for protection when the person carrying feels confident with their ability to accurately handle the "said" weapon...
 
I WANTED to buy my wife a gun. I still DO! Because she decided she "really liked" my VERY OWN, PERSONAL G19 while she trained prior to getting her carry permit. I haven't carried that gun since. I'm not sure if I've even SEEN it!

Remember gents, that woman is likely your potential BACK-UP. Get her good training (that means from someone who isn't YOU). See that ALL her gear (gun, ammo, holster, etc., etc.) is AT LEAST as good as yours. Good enough & hand-me-downs will NOT DO!

If you've got hard-line, serious, no-flex opinions about the process of her being armed. You secretly tell those opinions to a gun-savvy 3rd party who is trusted by BOTH of you. Then let that 3rd party "filter" those opinions to your wife. Trust me ;)

Anyone who thinks the female human is less capable of taking a defensive stand has never seen a women who believes/recognizes their children are endangered. They make a Momma Grizzly seem kind & soft-hearted.
 
For several years I tried to teach my wife how to use a 9mm. She just couldn't (or wouldn't) get comfortable using it.
About a year ago a friend loaned me an old Charter Arms Undercover 38. He just wanted me to clean it up and shoot a few through it. My wife picked it up and liked it. Well, we went behind the house and she began to shoot up all my 38 ammo. A few days later she was the proud owner of a Chick Lady ultra lite. (Pink Charter Arms .38)

She now shoots once or twice a week and is completely comfortable with her own little 5 shot revolver. I don't even go out to coach her any more. She has even picked her favorite load that groups the best. And by the way, at 15 to 20 yards she can shoot a pretty darn good group.

She now wants to learn how to operate and shoot my little automatic carry gun so she can get a CCL. (In Arkansas to qualify with revolver means you can only carry a revolver but qualify with auto you can carry either) So we have been doing some practice with a little 380 and she likes it. She even likes the 9mm now, go figure.

So I guess she just needed to pick up the right gun to get interested in it. I really haven't figured it out.

JD
 
I can give you a little insight. A woman knows if she has a hard time picking up a new traditionally male skill it's going to be because she's a woman while if a man has the same problems it isn't blamed on his gender. It takes some guts for us to plunge into something that isn't traditionally our territory; knowing that we represent for all women. I'm glad I decided to follow through after our awesome NRA course but it's taking me a long time work up the courage to show up out at the range during the steel shoots. I'm a rank newbie but I feel like the fact that I'm a woman will be what people notice when suck (which I will, at first).
 
I never really thought of it that way. That explains a lot. A frend of mine gives CCL classes and sometimes has ladies only classes. They are always full. I think its great that more women are learning to defend themselves.
I know that I feel a lot better leaving the house knowing that my wife can defend herself and our children if needed.

JD
 
I'm a woman, and feel like I should add my input here.

If a woman wants to get into shooting, she needs to shoot as many different firearms as possible to decide for herself which one fits her hand size, sight picture preferences, etc. You can't just go buy her one and expect it to work out perfectly. I've seen several men go and buy their girlfriends/wives guns only to end up frustrated because she didn't like it or enjoy shooting it. Let HER decide. She's (hopefully) a grown up and capable of making her own decisions. I hate to say it, but this mentality is one reason that some women are reluctant to get into shooting. So many of the guys "know it all" (seen that myself too) and treat the women as if they are not capable of making their own decisions about it.

If she's interested, encourage her interest in it. Do not, I repeat, do not say "You're doing it wrong"(sure fire way to make her lose interest). Find a better choice of words to correct issues. Then, let her pick the firearm that she wants.

That's my vent. Sorry for the long post. This is kind of a hot button for me...I've seen it happen over and over again. I've actually had women tell me that they enjoy shooting with me more than their Husbands/Boyfriends. I find that sad, but it all comes down to letting her make her own decisions, and not making her feel like you're being overly critical. I think the suggestion to let her take a class from someone else is a great one.

Okay, I'm done. haha
 
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I bought my wife one last weekend. She tried out a lot of them and decided she liked a Walther PK380. She is small and it fit her hand good. She surprised me with how accurate she is.
 
When my wife went shooting for the first time, she shot an XDM 9mm and she is really good with it... she just doesn't like the fact that it doesn't have any kind of manual thumb safety on it(like my 1911).

The second time we went together, I insisted she try renting an M&P 9mm or an FNP 9 or something else... something that she could potentially be comfortable with... but she is very headstrong and wanted only to use the XDM 9mm again.:rolleyes:

So we rented the XDM 9mm for her again, and the second time we went together I had my 1911 then, so I let her shoot a magazine through that... she was OK with it, but was just intimidated by the .45 recoil and was flinching badly.

Then she got pregnant, so her shooting will be on hiatus until the baby arrives(and probably a short while after that too)... she doesn't want me buying any guns for her... so I'm not going to.

BUT! I will buy a couple guns, one in .22 and another in 9mm that *I* like... and if she happens to enjoy one or both of them when she's shooting again, then she can have it... if not... gotta buy some more:evil:
 
I had my 1911 then, so I let her shoot a magazine through that... then she got pregnant....
So that's how that happens. Sorry, couldn't resist.

Seriously, my wife's from Vietnam and seen stuff only solders talk about - bad stuff. On the other hand she understands their purpose and I was very surprised when she said that we should "get something." I'm old enough to know not to blow it right from the start, so got her a Ruger Mk III, which she actually enjoyed. Unfortunately someone in the same pistol class had a .45 that she (the other student) was obviously afraid of - her BF/hubby was making his own mistake. She was flinching so badly it was a bit scary where the rounds were going. Anyhow, that sort of freaked out my wife, which is unfortunate because at some point, I'd like to work her up to the point where - if she has to - she can use my .45. It might be doable but it'll be tricky. Yes I know that I could get her something like a .38, but we need to work up to even that point. Have to give it time and to not push.

The point of this blathering is that you have to be very sensitive to your wife's reactions to guns of various calibers - don't just hand her your Desert Eagle... work up to it.
 
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