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Want first gun, wife problems

Discussion in 'General Gun Discussions' started by TelSmith, Feb 17, 2011.

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  1. danprkr

    danprkr Member

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    Secret = BAD DOG NO BONE!

    I will start by saying that there is a reason I am on my 2nd wife, but my advice would be just to tell her that you've come to the conclusion that one of the actions you need to take to meet your obligations to protect her and your children is to learn to use and have a firearm. That's the way it's going to be.

    Now be prepared to pay the price for that, and keep in mind that the price may very well be not only your marriage, but your kids. Because if you live in a liberal area her accusing you of being a bad parent because of the guns may fly. It wouldn't in my area, but I don't know where you live. If it flies there, then some judge may take your kids away and you'll NEVER see your kids again.

    So, if it's worth that risk to you then go for it.

    If not then start a long slow sell on the idea. And, sometimes that doesn't work, but it's really your best option.
     
  2. Skyshot

    Skyshot Member

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    Join a gun club, and take her there, you have an uphill battle,lies and secrets will never work. May be you could get her in a women in the outdoors program that is sponserd by your states Wildlife resources.
     
  3. mcdonl

    mcdonl Member

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    I would give up anything for my wife and family.

    So, OP... if your only goal for owning the guns is self defense in the home and on the streets, you may have a tough battle ahead of you.

    Here is a thought though... find a friend who can keep the guns in their safe... find a range, find a CCW class and start practicing and attending classes. Also, involve your wife from a "Sporting" perspective as much as you can.

    Perhaps the combination of her knowing how responsible gun owners are trained, practice and educated will bring her around a little.

    Highlight some of the devistating home invasions too may help.
     
  4. LibShooter

    LibShooter Member

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    This sounds like a guy destined to be CEO of half his household and a Dad on every other weekend.

    You guys who say having a gun is more important than a happy spouse SHOULD divorce her. She deserves a better man. Marriage is about making each other happy. Ignoring her strong feelings on this will be much more damaging to your family than the a theoretical bad guy who is unlikely to ever break in to your house.
     
  5. mcdonl

    mcdonl Member

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    I should note.... I have indeed "hid" purchases... Maybe "Not Annouced" is a better description.

    My wife has no problems with guns and will occasionally shoot but I don't ask her about her shoes and purses and she doesnt ask me about my guns :)
     
  6. Hoppes Love Potion

    Hoppes Love Potion Member

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    Listen to your wife. Many millions of Americans live in dangerous cities and they hardly ever get mugged, robbed, beaten, raped, tortured, or killed. Tell her the odds are she and the kids are perfectly safe, and if anything ever happens, the police will probably get there in time. Thank her for convincing you that you don't need to protect her or the kids.
     
  7. CalebJns

    CalebJns Member

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    I have an awesome wife, (it's my father in law that doesn't like me to have guns...but he grew up in a war riddled country, so he has a bad taste for that reason) and agree with everyone else, your marriage is worth SOOO much more than a couple hundred dollar firearm. We also do not have children as of yet...The danger of taking her shooting is that she may actually fall in love with it. Remember to start her out with a small .22 semi auto, then work her up to bigger and better things. It may even be worth while to get a small pellet pistol. You don't want to scare her off with recoil. Also make her wear a t-shirt and hat, glasses and ear protection. T-shirt should be full, not a tank top, or anything low cut...have a buddy that his wife refuses to shoot anymore because a casing went down her shirt, the hat also helps to keep the cases from hitting her face, etc...just becareful, my wife has fell in love with my 1911's and big revolvers....good luck to ya and takes it slow and easy.

    Sent from my HTC Glacier using Tapatalk
     
  8. feedthehogs

    feedthehogs Member

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    This really isn't about guns, its about your wife says no and thats it. No discussion, no compromise.

    I particularly don't call that a marriage. I imagine this happens quite a bit whether you admit it or not.

    Once that general problem is fixed, then you have a better chance of having a say in your house.

    And if you knew she was liberal in her ways, why get married?

    Don't get you guys who marry opposites and then try and figure out how to change the wife.
     
  9. InkEd

    InkEd Member

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    Educate her about firearms and present solid facts that favor your point if view.

    Here's a little test that I like to have people try when they question the need for a gun.

    See how long it takes to get from your front/back door to certain parts of the house. (I recommend the door to a bedroom.) It usually takes only a number of SECONDS!
    That is the amount of TIME you have to LIVE if someone breaks into your home. (Pretty scary FACT.) Now ask, if that is ENOUGH time for you to CALL for help, give a RUNDOWN of the situation and WAIT for help to be AVAILABLE? (The chances are you just phoned in the location for the coroner to pick up your body.) Next, lay on your bed and see how long it takes to draw a weapon and aim it at the bedroom door. That is how long it will take to SAVE your LIFE!

    Your time, your life and your choice.

    It is that simple.
     
  10. youngda9

    youngda9 member

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    Where do you live? There are a bunch of great people here who would gladly take you shooting.

    You could become more familiar with firearms, and get to know a shooter. Then you could bring yor wife along and educate her so she can see that it's just a tool and will not do anything on its own.

    A hunk of metal cannot be inherently evil or take over your mind or anything...that seems to be what many lefties think...er, believe.
     
  11. TrakHack

    TrakHack Member

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    LibShooter nailed it.
     
  12. va1911

    va1911 Member

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    What worked for me is we were sitting together one day with some quiet time (no kids) and I brought up some home invasions that had happened in the area. I said we need to formulate a plan should someone manage to get into the house while we're all here. We talked about what to do, who calls 911, which bedroom is the "safe" room where we all gather, etc. From there I was able to talk about the police response issue and that we really needed a firearm in the house to prevent a tragedy within the first 3-5 minutes of calling 911.

    For me, I already had a few guns and my wife knew of them but they were locked up in the basement. This conversation came to a result of me having a handgun locked in a handgun safe in the nightstand, so I feel a lot better. It's not the best access but we have toddlers so there is no other way that I can come up with.

    If you need to you can actually run the scenario. Get out the stop watch. Tell your wife, ok, you just dialed 911, now you hear a crash and the bad guy is in the house. LEt the seconds tick by, give a play by play, now he's at the stairs, now he's in the bedroom, etc. Stop when you need to but it drives home the point that A LOT can happen in 60 seconds.
     
  13. BoilerUP

    BoilerUP Member

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    I've got a liberal wife - our very first date was to an indoor range. Her + Colt Mustang = 7 shots inside the 8 ring at 7yd for her very first time firing a handgun. I knew then it was true love. She even bought me a Savage BVSS stock for Valentine's Day this year...

    If the OP's wife is as open-minded & progressive as liberals so often profess to be, she shouldn't be uncompromisingly opposed to simply having firearms in the household and/or being instructed in their use by a professional firearms instructor. There are multiple ways to mitigate (even eliminate) any possible risk to children, starting with EDUCATION AND EXPOSURE.

    Like any persuasive argument in life (and especially in marriage), its important to figure out exactly what her objections are and speak directly to those concerns.
     
  14. tarosean

    tarosean Member

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    Welll OP if you figure out how to persuade her... I need some help with my wife and a certain Nighthawk T3 Comp I've been eying. She has her own guns and shoots sometimes, so thats not my argument.

    I just need some help convincing her that the minuscule cash outlay required for one, is really not that bad. :)
     
  15. 9mmforMe

    9mmforMe Member

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    Forget what all these guys are saying. Go out and get as many guns as you can reasonably afford. Store them safely for the children's sake and go to the range as often as you need to become proficient. If the wife complains then bring home a new mommy.


    Buzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!


    Ugh...damn alarm clock!




    lol...my wife is very liberal and so am I actually. With that said I have been a gun enthusiast for over 15 years and though she didn't like my pistola being in the house she compromised and now admits she is curious about firing one!!
    I was shocked but practically rushed us out the door to the range. Keep working on your queen and she will come around. Emphasize that having a gun is a testament to how much you love your family.
     
  16. Justin

    Justin Moderator Emeritus

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    I'm sure that'd be a great way to run a marriage.

    If you live in Afghanistan.

    Meanwhile, those of us who live in the first world during the 21st century might find a different strategy would be more appropriate to the situation at hand.
     
  17. clamman

    clamman Member

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    I married a woman whose first husband was abusive to her, and eventually killed himself while she was in the same room with a 9MM to the noodle. When we started dating I told her I am a hunter, but I kept all guns out of view. As time went on, I would very slowly make her aware of my collection. She finally accepted them because I proved to her I am a responsible person. It took at least five years just to get her to touch one. We now have been married for sixteen years, and she owns several weapons, and we shoot together. Just have patience, be responsible and hopefully she will come around. How about this? Go buy a compound bow and start target practicing? Get her involved in that with you, and show her how satisfying it is? Just a thought.
     
  18. oneounceload

    oneounceload member

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  19. RockyMtnTactical

    RockyMtnTactical Member

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    I wouldnt keep it a secret. I would tell her that you are buying a shotgun and she doesn't have a say. As a man, I see it as my job to keep the family safe. Good luck!
     
  20. RONSERESURPLUS

    RONSERESURPLUS member

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    hELLO ALL

    As Far as Your situation, I have Little good news! I've dated and Lived with a Few Liberal women and even when I was inthe Military the idea of a Firearm was non-negotiable! You can try talking to her, reasoning with her and even pleading with her, a Liberal is a Liberal is a Liberal and your Not going to change that? Ya might be able to nag her into letting you have one, But inthe end, it will be a point of Friction of grief! You need to decide whats important in your life commn sence or a relationship, with a liberal, your not likely to have BOTH! Trust me, I know! I was stationed in calif for over 12 years and many of the women I dated and chased after were Liberals! I know of what I speak! I had the good sense not to marry one, and in your case too late about that? Wish I had better advice, but alwas, I don't! LOL

    RON
     
  21. TrakHack

    TrakHack Member

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    And having a gun in the house is both necessary and sufficient for ensuring the safety of your family? Really?
     
  22. 2WheelsGood

    2WheelsGood Member

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    Holy smokes! Reading some of these suggestions completely explains why the divorce rate is so high. I think Justin said it best... "if you live in Afghanistan".

    If you decide through rational discussion with your wife that you simply can't come to an agreement, you'll have to decide to either drop it, or go your separate ways. But seriously, buying a gun and then lying to her about it? If that's what your relationship is really like, why would you want to be married anyway?
     
  23. TexasRifleman

    TexasRifleman Moderator Emeritus

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    That's a good place to stop this one.
     
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