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What Gun for LLAMAS!

Discussion in 'General Gun Discussions' started by Cosmoline, Nov 26, 2005.

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  1. Cosmoline

    Cosmoline Member

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    And please, don't tell me "a llama" :D

    http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/05326/610474.stm

    The first hint Dale Airsman got that his morning's chores might end badly was the unusual growl from Charlie, a 4-year old llama.

    The noise graduated to a high-pitched squeal, whereupon Charlie spit, flattened his ears back and bared his teeth, including the three sets of razor-sharp "fighting teeth," which llamas use to rip the scrotum from male competitors in the wild.
    ----

    Jesh! I've run into small groups of llamas up here over the years--there's one or two outfits that use them to pack for tourists. I had no idea my nethers were in danger! Though in truth I've never trusted them. Too foreign and shifty-eyed.

    I never trusted the llamas very much either.
     
  2. MICHAEL T

    MICHAEL T Member

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    Thats what Llamas were designed for Llama protection :neener: . It your..........:what:
     
  3. Rupestris

    Rupestris Member

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    Well, I had planed to move to Montana and become a Llama farmer.
    I guess I'll raise me a crop of dental floss instead.:p

    I've heard of sheep farmers useing llamas to defend the heard from wolves and coyotes. They're pretty good at stomping the beans out of a predator.

    Like any animal, they are to be concidered unpredictable at best. Bears, dogs, deer, koalas, llamsa, etc... Expect the unexpected.
     
  4. Preacherman

    Preacherman Member

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    Somehow, even in my wildest fantasies, I have never been tempted to get "huggy-kissy" with any male animal, of any genus, species or breed... :what:
     
  5. Cosmoline

    Cosmoline Member

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    Awww shucks
    [​IMG]
     

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  6. jsalcedo

    jsalcedo Member

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    40mm grenade launcher.

    Anything else would be unsporting.

    Good thing charlie didn't try to do the scrotum ripping thing.
     
  7. Wiley

    Wiley Member

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    As the great 20th Century philosopher Ogden Nash wrote:

    "The one L Lama, he's a priest.

    The two L Llama, he's a beast.

    Bet you've never seen a three L Lllama."
     
  8. Dave Markowitz

    Dave Markowitz Member

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    You joke about llamas, but...

    The llama is a quadruped which lives in the big rivers like the Amazon. It has two ears, a heart, a forehead, and a beak for eating honey. But it is provided with fins for swimming.

    Llamas are larger than frogs.

    Llamas are dangerous, so if you see one where people are swimming, you shout...

    Look out, there are llamas!

    :neener:
     
  9. Don Gwinn

    Don Gwinn Moderator Emeritus

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    . . . . and they can complete a film on time and under budget, even if all the previous staff have had to be sacked.



    I have no words.
     
  10. Biker

    Biker Member

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    I've always wondered why most of the llama ranchers I've known had high-pitched voices.:uhoh:
    Biker
     
  11. El Tejon

    El Tejon Member

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    I would use whatever they used in Napoleon Dynamite.:D
     
  12. ALASKACAJUN

    ALASKACAJUN Member

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    Sounds like a job for the "Holy Hand Grenade!"

    - Clint :D
     
  13. Capt. Charlie

    Capt. Charlie Member

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    It ain't the teeth I worry about. The male's fighting teeth can easily be cut out just using string as a saw. In fact, I don't know anyone with llamas that leaves them intact. It's the spit I don't like. When that head points to the sky, ears go flat back, and you hear that gurgling in their throat, watch out! They can spit clear stuff, not too bad, or they can reach way down deep and pull up the most disgusting, vile, nasty stuff you can imagine and plant it dead center bullseye (in your face) from 7 feet away! We have five of them on the ranch where I help wrangle horses and guide trail, and we haven't lost a lamb to coyotes since we got them. Llamas are smart, really smart. They learn to do things after only 2 or 3 times. They are also usually laid back and gentle, but they do have a strict pecking order, and owners have to stay at the top of the order. Otherwise you get what happened there. I can't picture getting "kissy feely" :rolleyes: with them, but some folks try to treat them too much like a pet, and with llamas, familiarity really does breed contempt. They're extremely independant critters with a personality somewhat like a cat. They are outstanding pack animals for backpacking and small children can ride them. The fun thing is how they greet each other (and you). They rush up and plant their nose right up against yours. Always good for a few laughs when you introduce someone new to them and they don't know what's coming :what: :evil: :D .
     
  14. Jamie C.

    Jamie C. Member

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    ...razor-sharp "fighting teeth,"........to rip the scrotum from....

    Hmmm.....

    I used to have a sister-in-law that, rumor has it, got into a sorority or some other "group", while in college, by castrating a lamb with her teeth.... :eek:

    She never confirmed or denied this, and would only smile when asked about it.... Which I always found more than a little scary. :uhoh:


    J.C.
     
  15. The_Antibubba

    The_Antibubba Member

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    That llama spit sounds even better than pepper spray!

    Does anyone know if you can carry a llama in NYC? :D




    "Old llama herders never die-the just get sacced"
     
  16. Sheldon J

    Sheldon J Member

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    The daughter was given a baby Alpacka mostly dead 2 days old and the mom had abandoned it. She now has a 6 month old very valuable animal. One problem she has been dealing with is something called "Crazy Llama Syndrome". Basically it boils down to you bottle feed them they think of you as part of the flock, so when they mature they want to fight. How do you fix this, well... you fix them..:evil:
     
  17. Gunpacker

    Gunpacker Member

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    They can be mean for sure.

    Saw a film clip on one of the "funniest" shows. In the clip, a reporter went into a fenced area with Llamas. One of them came up to the reporter who wasn't afraid, proptly kinda grabbed him between his front legs, and pushed him forward for 20 yards or so into a sewage trench. Llama stopped short. I am not sure, but the Llama appeared to be laughing.:evil:
     
  18. Capt. Charlie

    Capt. Charlie Member

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    I saw that clip! I'll bet that if that reporter knew what that (male) llama REALLY had in mind, he never would've let that clip go beyond the cutting room floor! :what: :D :D
     
  19. stratus

    stratus Member

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    You people must have all been drunk at the time of posting. I read some of these posts and... oh my hairy lord.

    I did not know llamas have beaks and fins. I just think of Napoleon Dynamite. "eat the FOOD!"
     
  20. Shorts

    Shorts Member

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    I think the protection you're looking for is called a "cup"
     
  21. heisler

    heisler Member

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  22. Justin

    Justin Moderator Staff Member

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    THE CHAIR IS AGAINST THE WALL
  23. Preacherman

    Preacherman Member

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    Hmmm... So, if I have a Safepacker specially made out of llama hair, does that make it an Al-Packer?

    :neener:
     
  24. Justin

    Justin Moderator Staff Member

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    THE CHAIR IS AGAINST THE WALL
    AAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!

    :)
     
  25. nfl1990

    nfl1990 Member

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    Well since noone has said it yet, I'll say it, a FA .50bmg
     
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