Quantcast
  1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

When No Means No...In the Shooting Sense

Discussion in 'General Gun Discussions' started by Anthony, Apr 26, 2006.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Anthony

    Anthony Member

    Joined:
    Dec 26, 2002
    Messages:
    572
    Hello Everyone,

    I would imagine that the majority of people on The High Road are careful not to discuss their shooting hobby very much in their respective work environments due to lightweight Yuppies and their PC breatheren. Recently I accepted a position with a small company in which several members of management enjoy shooting. Initially I thought this would be a blessing and deviated from my long standing rules of mixing business with pleasure...little did I know!

    The bad part is that these individuals are not truly shooters in the sense that this is their primary or only hobby. They don't sit down with Elmer Keith's books and read them over and over again, research new calibers, etc. They are golfers who like to go shooting sometimes. I went shooting with one of them ONCE and now the guy is all over me like a cheap suit.

    Anyway, following our one shooting trip he started pestering me literally everyday about going shooting again. He has proven to be a rather rude individual as you get to know him who talks about others behind their back in very ugly ways. In fact, I know he has discussed a couple of my firearms projects with other people without my permission. He's also one of those individuals who isn't very bright, but fancies himself clever and intelligent. Further, he tries to lecture me about shooting and equipment when he's been doing it a few months compared to my 24 years of enjoying the sport. Then when he needs help he asks my advice. Combine this with a massive inferiority complex and you have this guy.

    The first time I mentioned being interested in long range rifle shooting, he immediately suggests we buy the same kind of rifles, learn together, and go shooting every weekend. Yes, the first time! Further, if you put him off about going to the range he starts suggesting ways you could go or equipment you could use. He's like a leach or someone of the opposite sex who won't take "no" for an answer! We're talking "no life" in a big way when it comes to this guy while I have a very full one that I eek out time every couple of weeks for a big trip to the range...and I don't want to spend it with him! I've got a regular group of shooting buddies and a very talented disabled student I have been teaching for sometime.

    Ignoring him and the subject didn't work so I finally told him that I was not single and living in an apartment like him so I did not have as much free time. Further, when I did get time it was very last minute. So I would not be planning any future shooting trips with him. He alluded to the coming day light savings time shift, but I did not take the bait or give him any hope. I've simply kept our discussions to business unless he asks for shooting advice and that's it. I've reversed some of the things I have said about my shooting projects or interests just to snub any stories he has spread about me and my hobby. I'm a very private individual by nature and have gotten used to other shooters being the same way.

    The worst part is the guy now shoots where I shoot on a regular basis as he lives near the range. If he were to come over and try to "train" my disabled student like so many men I have chased off (she is rather attractive) all hell would break loose. This guy is friends with individuals in the executive suite of our company and I do not wish to be mean to him, but he's working on it pretty hard here.

    The other day he says to me, "You know, for someone who is really into shooting you don't go very much." I replied that there was more to shooting than the act itself and left it at that.

    Anyone ever have a similar situation or humorous story along these lines?

    How did you handle it?

    Currently I am auditioning other ranges to start frequenting just to get away from this guy and hope to find one soon.

    In closing, I would like to say that although I was never one of them I feel for all of the ladies who had the deadbeat guys who would never stop calling you and bothering you to go out with them.

    Now I know what that feels like!
     
  2. Mongo the Mutterer

    Mongo the Mutterer Member

    Joined:
    Apr 28, 2005
    Messages:
    1,242
    Location:
    St. Louis
    I'll tell you how I would. Very carefully.

    You are the newbie, he is the old hand at the company. Also you said he has low self esteem. My first advice is watch your six!

    Then, although I wouldn't go shooting with him, I would provide him with shooting stuff (magazines, etc.) and discuss firearms with him. It seems your goal is to away from range trips with him. If you discuss opinions, and respect his (when you can), you will be better off.

    You already said he is a backstabber, so don't turn your back to him. Hold your enemies close.

    YMMV
     
  3. BullfrogKen

    BullfrogKen Moderator Emeritus

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2005
    Messages:
    14,886
    Location:
    Lewisberry, PA
    Reply with, "You're right, I don't. These guys here at work keep me so busy, and with spring coming I need to spend time doing projects and family activities. Sorry. Why don't you go on out there and have fun. You don't need me to come along to have a good time, do you?"

    Keep turning him down, avoid extracurricular discussions, and make yourself into a very boring person to spend time with. He'll give up.

    And you've learned not to make that mistake again. I passed up many opportunities to develop this kinship at work. Many . . .

    I can make a choice of being discreet and not getting hassled, or let everyone at work know (because once the gossip hound finds out, everyone knows) and then have to make choices about carrying and the negative light it puts me in among those who despise my interest.


    I bet if this guy's a jerk, and everyone knows he's a jerk. Act like a gentlemen around everyone else, and politely downplay and dismiss with an incredulous look the subject when anyone brings to you what he's said around the office. You can do damage control, an eventually folks will forget. But you have to make an effort now to dissassociate yourself with him, and appear to concur with everyone else's opinion the guy is over the top, you just didn't know it until you spent an afternoon with him.

    I bet he isn't 30 yet, not even 25? Eventually he'll move on to another company. Just don't encourage him. At all.
     
  4. Anthony

    Anthony Member

    Joined:
    Dec 26, 2002
    Messages:
    572
    Would you believe more like 50 years old?
     
  5. High Planes Drifter

    High Planes Drifter Member

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2006
    Messages:
    1,204
    Well, if you keep avoiding him and make it a point not to at least be sociable with him in the office, he WILL begin to resent you and start unwanted rumors about you. I'd handle this with "silk gloves". Socialize with him at work a bit, but make it a point to bring up how you have a home project going on, or how you have big plans for the weekend with your wife + kids. Bring this up first so he wont ask you to go to the range or anywhere else. What Im getting at is - if you feel he has stroke with upper management - then dont just give him the cold shoulder; dont just completely shut him out. So he's an a$$h*le, its not going to kill you to be friendly to him.

    Or if you have the cahunas' and are confident enough in your sexuality, you could grab his butt and smile seductively at him when he turns around. That'll get him off your back.;)
     
  6. Anthony

    Anthony Member

    Joined:
    Dec 26, 2002
    Messages:
    572
    Highplains Drifter: LMAO!!! I'm afraid I am knuckle dragger deluxe...I could never do anything of the kind.

    Actually I recently came into a mountain of work so I have a good excuse to be remote for awhile and this is common knowledge.

    I do associate with him and agree with your "silk gloves" point.

    He's not so much of an @sshole as he is just pathetic.
     
  7. Havegunjoe

    Havegunjoe Member

    Joined:
    Jun 8, 2004
    Messages:
    276
    Location:
    Minnesota
    Everyone who knows me at work, knows I shoot.

    "I would imagine that the majority of people on The High Road are careful not to discuss their shooting hobby very much in their respective work environments due to lightweight Yuppies and their PC breatheren."

    I have pictures of myself hunting and shooting as well as myself on the company sponsored trap team on the walls of my office. Do the rest of you really hide the fact that you shoot?
     
  8. XDKingslayer

    XDKingslayer member

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2006
    Messages:
    1,811
    Location:
    Port Charlotte, Fl.
    Employ bullseye shooting competitions at $5.00 a round. i.e. he shoots 4 bulls and you shoot 6, he pays you $10.00.

    He'll go away when he's broke and you'll have more money to buy guns.
     
  9. WayneConrad

    WayneConrad Member

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2005
    Messages:
    2,128
    Location:
    Phoenix, AZ
    "Do the rest of you really hide the fact that you shoot?"

    I've got my favorite target -- the one day when I shot like I knew how -- hanging on the wall by my desk next to a list of phone numbers, a Thomas Jefferson quote, an AzCDL sticker, and various to-do lists.
     
  10. m.i.sanders

    m.i.sanders Member

    Joined:
    Dec 24, 2002
    Messages:
    233
    Location:
    Upstate SC
    I don't hide the fact that I shoot. I have gun rag's on my side table, a collection of bullets I picked up from the range, and a NRA calander hanging up.
    Actually, there's at least seven people on my floor besides myself that have a CCW permit, not to mention all of the hunters, IPSC shooters, etc, that work here. I once dropped a dummy .45 acp round in my bosses office and a vendor found it. She knew exactly where it came from. :evil:
     
  11. akodo

    akodo Member

    Joined:
    Aug 31, 2005
    Messages:
    2,778
    it seems like a good idea to acknowedge your shared hobby in a nontimeconsuming, noncommital way.

    One way would be to give him a book on the technicals of shooting you enjoyed. Be aware that you may never get the book back, but really, $20 is a small price to pay for getting him off your back for a while, but not having him turn on you (chalk it up to a stupidity tax for getting in there in the first place)

    mention in passing 'a guy I know mentioned getting gun XYZ the other day' something that can get him exited, but give you the easy out of 'i don't know why he wants it' or 'youd have to ask him, I won't see him again for another 3 weeks' etc. Again, you are allowing him to spend lots of mental time 'with' you while you are actually free to do your own thing
     
  12. Standing Wolf

    Standing Wolf Member in memoriam

    Joined:
    Dec 24, 2002
    Messages:
    24,041
    Location:
    Idahohoho, the jolliest state
    I've never been ashamed about the fact that I exercise my Second Amendment civil rights.

    Sad to say, the world includes altogether too many dependent, pestiferous people who have no idea how boring they are. Television was invented for them, but many of them seem not to know how to make good use of it.
     
  13. migoi

    migoi Member

    Joined:
    Feb 11, 2004
    Messages:
    560
    Location:
    Hawaii
    High Plains Drifter...

    I think you've blended a couple of words:
    Kahuna is the Hawaiian word for priest, teacher, expert, or advisor.

    Cojones is the slang Spanish word for testicles.

    Of course you could have been referring to a Hawaiian priest well endowed in the testicular region.

    migoi
     
  14. 30-06 lover

    30-06 lover Member

    Joined:
    Mar 2, 2006
    Messages:
    584
    Location:
    CA
    I had a buddy (for about 6 months) that I thought was a cool dude, but the more I went hunting and shooting with him, the more he opened up to me. He started expressing sexual fantasies that has about his mom and juvenile sister.:what: Well after he dropped that one on me, I have had little contact with him. I still see him around where I used to work, and when I see him, he begs me to go shooting with him or take him hunting. I just say that I can't because I don't have the money, time, transportation, etc. He getting the hint and now doesn't ask me to take him, but he will call and invite me to go with him. I politely decline and thank him for the offer. It sucks knowing what I know, and not have aything I can do about it becuase he has not done anything to his mom or sister...yet.:barf:
     
  15. Preacherman

    Preacherman Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2002
    Messages:
    13,309
    Location:
    Louisiana, USA
    Migoi, Migoi, Migoi . . . what am I going to do with you??? :eek:

    :evil: :D :neener:
     
  16. aguyindallas

    aguyindallas Member

    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2004
    Messages:
    1,604
    Location:
    Texas
    I have the answer:


    Point him to www.thehighroad.org

    It will consume so much of his time, he wont bother you anymore.
     
  17. Lupinus

    Lupinus Member

    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2005
    Messages:
    3,502
    Location:
    Upstate SC
    most of the people at my work know I shoot, own guns, and any who have started the gun control stuff have gotten the gun control doesn't work speech. Now if it actually had effect or bored them so much that they don't want to endure it agian I'm not sure, but it has gotten those few people off my back. Honestly, other then a few people none have had anything bad to say about guns. And of those few none have been downright hostle twoards guns.
     
  18. CB900F

    CB900F Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2003
    Messages:
    4,717
    Anthony;

    I think High Planes Drifter gave you some good advice - except for that last paragraph. I did laugh at that, but wouldn't consider it as a practical solution. What if he smiled back?

    In any case. Yes to silk gloves. Maybe one or two more times, tell him your're going to the range, actually shoot with him. Don't cut him dead on this if he's truly the type you've made him out to be. Not to say you can't recieve a phone call 'bout an hour into the shoot & have to leave.

    In other words, distance yourself, but do it nicely & slowly. Consider this a real world intelligence test.

    900F
     
  19. Stevie-Ray

    Stevie-Ray Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2003
    Messages:
    4,090
    Location:
    Mitchi-gun, the Sunrise Side
    Bad idea. He may also increase his attention 4-fold. How do you get out of that one?:uhoh:
     
  20. gunsmith

    gunsmith member

    Joined:
    May 8, 2003
    Messages:
    5,906
    Location:
    Reno, Nevada
    I disagree with everyone

    Just tell the guy the truth.
    He's heard it before, he needs to hear it again.
    If everyone treats him with kid gloves he won't learn.
    You will be doing him a big favor by taking him aside and telling him what you
    told us.
    Your co workers allready know he has a problem and that will lessen any negative impact.

    Or you could just start telling people that while you are flattered by his constant attention, and you have no predjudice against homosexuals you wish he would stop asking you out because your hetro....I did that once in a similar situation and it worked like a charm.
     
  21. MechAg94

    MechAg94 Member

    Joined:
    Apr 17, 2005
    Messages:
    4,748
    I don't make it a secret about owning and shooting guns, but I am very reluctant to get into details about what I own and how many guns I own. Just goes against the grain.
     
  22. CajunBass

    CajunBass Member

    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2005
    Messages:
    5,690
    Location:
    North Chesterfield, Virginia
    I used to have that problem when people would find out that I like to bass fish. "Well, when are we going fishing?" My usual reply was "I prefer to fish by myself. I can go when I want to, stay as long as I want to, come home when I want to. I couldn't tell you "I'm going tomorrow, because to tell you the truth I don't know if I am or not. I won't know until tomorrow."

    I had one guy who kept telling me, "That doesn't matter. Just call me anytime. I called him one morning at 0530 when I knew he had worked the 3pm-11pm shift. "Hey, You ready to go to the river?"...... Huh? You mean NOW? Ok. I gotta take a shower, and get something to eat....Ok. The boat is leaving the ramp in 30 mins. Be there if you want to go.

    Never heard anymore noise from him about going with me.
     
  23. evan price

    evan price Member

    Joined:
    Dec 7, 2005
    Messages:
    5,476
    Location:
    http://www.ohioccw.org/ Ohio's best CCW resour
    You could try going the other way entirely. Start bugging the guy about going shooting more often. Only take one gun like a .22 or something. Then start long boring conversations involving the relative merits of the .41 Action Express Versus the modern .40 S&W cartridge and go in to great detail ballistically. Bore the guy to tears.

    I had a fella liked to do the same stuff that I did, I would let him make "appointments" like, next Saturday at 7am, then I just would turn off phone ringer and leave cell phone in truck and sleep in. Next week at work Iwould get the "Hey man where were you?" thing, I would just say I overslept. Do this often enough they ge the message.
     
  24. evan price

    evan price Member

    Joined:
    Dec 7, 2005
    Messages:
    5,476
    Location:
    http://www.ohioccw.org/ Ohio's best CCW resour
    If all else fails, tell him he isn't professional enough.....:evil:
     
  25. Kestrel

    Kestrel Member

    Joined:
    Dec 26, 2002
    Messages:
    2,168
    Just put him in the car and drop him off in the country...
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.

Share This Page