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Where did the word "Mall Ninja" come from

Discussion in 'General Gun Discussions' started by Lonestar, Aug 11, 2006.

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  1. Lonestar

    Lonestar Member

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    I have been trolling Gun Forums for years and posted on a few, somewhere I picked up the term Mall Ninja, and everyone on various gun forums agree that the term means a person who is super tactical, a wannabe civilian commando.

    Unfortunately I dropped the term in conversation with my wife and her liberal girlfriends:barf: and when they asked why Mall Ninja = tactical, I had no good way to define the term.
     
  2. ny32182

    ny32182 Member

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    I first saw it with regard to the hilarious "Gecko45" guy from Glocktalk, who said he was a mall security guard and a ninja, among other things... though I don't know if that is where the term originated.
     
  3. Reap23

    Reap23 Member

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    Oh yeah...

    I loved that thread! Does anyone still have it? Wasn't the guy worried about taking .308's in the back while reloading or something? Please still have a link... anyone?
     
  4. PinnedAndRecessed

    PinnedAndRecessed member

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    Last edited: Aug 11, 2006
  5. PinnedAndRecessed

    PinnedAndRecessed member

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    BTW, I'll bet the farm that the original mall ninja was a very savvy, true gun expert and was poking fun at the millions of internet Rambo idiotic wannabes.

    The way he manipulated the original thread was pure genius.

    Either that or he was a total freaking retard.
     
  6. ny32182

    ny32182 Member

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    I think it was a regular member messing with them. The way he started the thread garnered serious responses at first, and then he slowly went farther off the deep end, seeing what outlandish things he would ultimately be able to say before someone called him on it.

    It was pure genius. That is what made it so funny.
     
  7. AJAX22

    AJAX22 Member

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    Here's a link to all of the posts Gecko45 has made, somone actually compiled a list, I'm only a little way down and I've already shot coco out my nose twice...

    Don't eat or drink when you read his stuff.

    http://lonelymachines.org/mall-ninjas/
     
  8. Hawkmoon

    Hawkmoon Member

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    Yes, I believe that was the birth of the Mall Ninja. I missed out on his pal, SpecOps, though -- thanks for posting the retro view.

    6'-5" and 250 pounds, eh? IF that were all muscle it might be not too bad, but I'm 6'-3" and currently 230, and I consider myself to be horribly fat and out of shape. I don't see 6'-5" and 250 as being much of an improvement.

    Anybody else notice how quickly Gecko got promoted from Sergeant to Lieutenant? The boy is certainly on a fast track to ... somewhere.
     
  9. .45Guy

    .45Guy Member

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    Dangit, all the hits have ate up the geocities site's bandwidth. I'm gonna have to wait to read page two.:mad:
     
  10. Devonai

    Devonai Member

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    I have to agree with ny32182. I read the archive that Ajax posted, and it seems that way to me.
     
  11. hso

    hso Moderator Staff Member

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    My understanding is that the evil genius behind Mall Ninja was a member here who helped manage a gun shop and had gotten his fill of the Cyber CIA, Recliner Recondo and Rambozo crowd and decided to lampoon them.
     
  12. Dan M.

    Dan M. Member

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    My theory

    Gecko45 and SpecOps are really Michael McKean and Christopher Guest and they are developing another improv movie a la "This is Spinal Tap", "Waiting For Guffman" or "Mighty Wind" only instead of touring rocker stars, community theater or a folk music revival, this movie is about mall security.
     
  13. Carl N. Brown

    Carl N. Brown Member

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    Irregardless of the origin, the term "Mall Ninja" conjures
    in my mind the image of an "expert" who learned his
    martial arts/gun fighting skills from the video arcade;
    like the guy who posted about using flash bang grenades
    for home defense.
     
  14. whm1974

    whm1974 Member

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    I used to work at a jr college that had a police training course, and half of the students would take a security guard job at the college. quite a few of them had a chip on thier shoulder. And a couple of them were police rejects as well.

    I have heard policemen make snide remarks about "rent a cops" before.

    -Bill
     
  15. Essex County

    Essex County Member

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    I've got to travel 30 miles to the nearest mall. Last time I was there in 2 002 I spotted no Ninjas. I don't doubt that they exist, but aren't they required to wear nameplates? I still think they don't matter much....Essex
     
  16. wingnutx

    wingnutx Member

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    iirc, he said he duct-taped SAPI plates to his back just in case.

    :D
     
  17. Q-Lock

    Q-Lock Member

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    Thank you for the links! I always wondered where the term "mall ninja" came from...now I know. Those posts make for a great laugh.
     
  18. wingnutx

    wingnutx Member

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    HAH!
     
  19. daysleeprx

    daysleeprx Member

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    That site AJAX22 posted delivers. Oh man.
     
  20. Thefabulousfink

    Thefabulousfink Member

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    Of course you couldn't see them, THEY'RE NINJAS:neener:
     
  21. fedaykincmndr

    fedaykincmndr Member

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    If y'all really think about it, that's REALLY sad. I was more astonished by that than entertained. Don't get me wrong it was VERY funny, but that's really sad. I betchya there's a shrink somewhere that would love to get inside that one's head for a few minutes. Then again, the pain and PTSD inside that head might make the shrink crazy!! :D :what:
     
  22. coyote_jr

    coyote_jr member

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    I am a Master of three martial arts including ninjitsu, which means I can wear the special boots to climb walls.

    That line produced tears:D
     
  23. Dionysusigma

    Dionysusigma Member

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    [​IMG]

    The Original. :D
     
  24. jooos

    jooos Member

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    Mall Ninja

    You've got to read this....From my Myspace CCW group.

    http://forum.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=messagebo...2858192B3C1DF6848952
    This is the first I heard of a "Mall Ninja" some pretty funny stuff.

    quote:
    Hello All.

    I am new to this group; however I am not new to carrying. I have been carrying for awhile now. I have lived my entire life by the traditional Republican values (yes I said I am a Republican and damn proud of it!), the Boy Scout Motto of Be Prepared, and the motto Better to be judged by 12 than carried by 6.

    I carry six guns. All of them are Glocks in .40 S&@ caliber with Night Sights and are bone stock except for some wolf springs. I carry 2 Glock 22s on my right and left hips in C-Tacs, 2 Glock 23s in my Alessi Bodyguard shoulder holster, 1 Glock 27 on my left ankle, and another Glock 27 in my right hand pocket. I also carry some folding knives. I carry 2 Chris Reeves folding knives, both of them are Sebenzas. I carry the small one in the left hand pocket of my 5.11 Tactical pants. I carry the larger one in the mag pocket on the right hand side with a Glock 22 magazine. I carry another 4 Glock 22 magazines behind the guns on my hips. I carry an extra magazine on a mag pouch on my right hip. I also carry a surefire E2E flashlight clipped onto my left hand pocket. You never know when you will need a light. I am going to be carrying 2 pairs of hand cuffs when I decide on a decent manufacturer and holster (suggestions are wanted). For my commo gear (I wasnt in the military but I adopted some of it into my everyday lingo through many CCW courses) I use a Nextel I560 phone in black (dont want to get the yellow one and give my reflection away in case some BG seems me in an alley) and I have a Pager with Skytel service. I also have a Zippo lighter in case I need to make a torch or something if stuck in a Hurricane Katrina situation. I also carry some OC spray (Fox labs if youre wondering)

    I just wanted to share some of my experiences. I have been carrying a long time. I remember when I got my first permit. I felt ecstatic. It was an awesome responsibility I was ready to deal with. Not to mention I had been trained for it. I took an intensive CCW class that was several hours in length and have taken a few classes since then. I was like a Police Officer on his first shift. I was so happy that I had been granted the right to carry because there needs to be many more CCWers to help bring crime rates down. It is a heavy burden that we as Sheepdogs have to bear to protect the sheeple.

    On my first day CCWing I went on patrol and walked around the entire neighborhood watching things with my hyper sense of awareness. Nobody but other CCWers understands what I am talking about. I walked through the neighborhood and I saw the illegal immigrants sitting on the stoop watching me with a keen eye. I suspect that they were intimidated by my presence (I am 61 and 325 lbs) with a 50 inch waist. I dont understand Spanish but they must have been talking about me.

    As a side note, what does Gordo mean?

    I continued walking and I saw some gangbangers. There were 4 urban youth (read black kids playing basketball with jerseys listening to crap music err I mean rap music) who were probably carrying illegally. They were talking on someones porch. They looked at me and started talking amongst themselves. One of them called me biggie (some sort of respect thing?) and I kept walking.

    As I got further into town I realized I needed to recharge my batteries with some food. I got myself a burrito at the local store. It was being worked by illegals (they are everywhere arent they?) but they make some damn good burritos and nachos. I got a huge super burrito (the kind that are football size) and some nachos with extra cheese and jalapenos. A large soda would wash that down nicely. I brought my food to the table and then got up to fill my soda (it was a self serve soda fountain) when some illegal immigrant gangbanger drug dealers walked in. One of them looked at me and I knew I was in for some trouble. They were probably packing guns. Gangbangers always pack lorcins and hi-points and not quality tactical gear. I made eye contact to let them know that I am hyper aware and that they will not be getting past me should something go down. Those stupid illegal immigrant gangbangers would regret messing with me.

    Sure enough they called me a racist name. (Only white people can be racist, stupid racist illegal loving liberals!). I ignored it because I never start trouble when I am CCWing. I just waited in line for the soda machine when one of them pushed me. He wasnt strong enough to push my 345 lb frame. I told him not to touch me and took a defensive posture. I read about it on some tactical forums. Its one Navy SEALs use when going into close quarters combat. (I am not a SEAL or a veteran but I train just as hard with my CCW.) My CCW instructor approved of it and I told the illegal scumbag gangbanger that I would use force to defend myself and my family (who were not there, they dont patrol the neighborhood with me) if he should continue his attack.

    They laughed and pushed me again. I pushed back. I threw my weight into it and pushed him into some tables. His other stupid Mexican illegal immigrant friend started saying something in Spanish and he put his hand into his pocket. I reached for the Glock 22 on my right hip and drew. The illegal immigrant took his hand out of his pocket and I told him to get down on the ground. Then I told his buddies to do the same thing. I then proceeded to handcuff the one who pushed me and the bigger of the other two. I then put on some Hatch Cooltac gloves and searched them. All of the employees in the store and the customers started clapping and cheering for me.

    Bu not one to neglect my civic duty I had to keep a close eye and my Glock on the other one until my backup arrived. The responding officers came in with their guns drawn and ready to do some wet work. I laughed as once they saw me they put their guns away and I holstered mine. They proceeded to laugh once they saw I had the situation under complete control. They asked my advice on guns and we talked. I told them how I considered law enforcement at one point but I felt the job wasnt my forte. They didnt cuff me or anything and just took a statement. One of them even offered to buy me lunch and I got the number of one of the female officers who responded to the man with a gun call. When will the liberal anti-gunners learn that people like me are able to handle ourselves and act as sheepdogs for them (the sheeple)? Anyway we are going to the range and I am going to show her how to shoot. She also expressed getting her CCW permit. Luckily I have a lot of training and know a lot of people so she will probably taking a class where she will learn to think tactically.

    After about 10 minutes of questioning from the cops I was ready to hit the streets again. I continued to walk down the street and check the neighborhood out. I decided that I should probably check the local Dunkin Donuts / Baskin Robbins out. I wanted to stop and rest my tired feet but as a civic minded CCWer I would not shirk my god given responsibilities to protect the neighborhood. I went in and got myself an extra large Peanut Butter and Chocolate malt. As I waited for the ******* to make my malt I noticed one of the officers I saw at the burrito shop. He nodded at me and I sat down at the table next to him. He told me what a good job I did and how much he loved responsible CCWers. I told him that it was just the training from my CCW classes. The whole You default to your level of training thing. He was very impressed and said I would make a fine tac-officer (SWAT for all you non-LEO types). Then he offered to pay for my malt as the ******* guy who worked there called out my order.

    That was just one of my many forays into the streets. What made it unique was that it was my first day CCWing. Since then I have become an old hand when it comes to CCWing. I just wanted to share what my first day was like.

    *****Just to clearify... This is what the link above will show you... I did not write or post this....*****
     
  25. MDMadrid

    MDMadrid Member

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    mall ninja

    I went back and read all of the postings!!!! I never laughed so hard!! thanks
     
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