She got a gunrack on her shopping cart... for Uzis.
She got a trauma plate in her Nomex panties.
She got a black belt in sixteen katas and can still kill your a$$ with a shoe.
She got piano wire stashed in her weave.
She scolded me with a kubaton.
She a lipstick applicator look like a 12 gauge round.
I said she had a nice rack and she thought I was talking about her shotgun. Then she figured it out I got the kuboton again. I couldn't even spell Krav Maga before yesterday.
Her compact got a retractable handle so she can check the underside of her ride. I ain't never seen a bullet proof Geo, but she got one.
She use a flash bang to get everybody out of the pool.
She just look at a perp behind her Oakleys and the fool would throw his hands up and say "I did it" on the WAY to the crime. Hell he ain't even got to be strapped yet. Hell he was just thinking about robbing the McDonalds NEXT Thrursday... just fall on the ground blubbering 'don't kill me momma.'
That's how tactical your momma is.
with apologies to Chris Rock.