You know you're tactical if........

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hkmp5g17

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You talk about your specops days in the army.....the Savation Army!:scrutiny:


You wear your fanny pack on your ...well on your fanny!:rolleyes:




You've never had a negligient discharge- except after eating Mexican food!:eek:


You've competed in 3 gun matches- in the Walmart produce aisle!:evil:


You conduct weekly live fire hostage rescue drill in the "funhouse' aka the outhouse!:barf:


You own the Lorcin "Tactical" model- duct tape sold seperately!:(

And most impotantly-

You KNOW you're tactical because you have a tactical usernam.... like hkmp5g17! Oh wait.......:uhoh:
 
You know you're "tactical" if...

Your pyjamas are made by Robbins 5.11...

Your bedroom slippers have Vibram soles...

Your trousers wear out at the IWB holster point, rather than at the seat...

Your shower curtain reduces IR radiation...

Your night lights all have red bulbs to improve night vision...

And, last but not least - your Dobermann/Rottweiler/other tactical dog is trained to bring your gun to you in its mouth if it hears an intruder.

:D
 
Reaally tactical folks use IR night lights...with NVGs by the bed.
Click to expand...

Reaaaaaally tactical folks have no night lights at all.

Through endless tactical drills, they can "see" their bedroom layout in the pitch black as if they were Zatoichi, the blind swordsman, and can shoot COM double-taps by using hearing alone as their "sights".

:D
 
......your carbon fiber underwear you custom ordered from BlackHawk has a Kevlar liner to combat that 'not so fresh feeling' during no-knock mall bathroom stall entries.....:p
 
torpid said:
Reaaaaaally tactical folks have no night lights at all.

Through endless tactical drills, they can "see" their bedroom layout in the pitch black as if they were Zatoichi, the blind swordsman, and can shoot COM double-taps by using hearing alone as their "sights".

:D
Click to expand...

I had no idea I was tactical. Thank you for opening my eyes, I shall attempt
to clothe myself in a manner more befitting my nature.:cool:
 
All your ammo comes in small packages with outragous graphics on the outside.
 
Your trousers wear out at the IWB holster point, rather than at the seat...
Click to expand...

ALL of my pants have that worn spot now. some have holes there. it sucks. my IWB is on teh inside of my pants and my folding knife is on the outside, in my back pocket. the rub against one another with a layer of denim in between and i get the hole. does that make me tactical?

Bobby
 
You know you're tactical when..........


You have a topographical map of your neighborhood.

You have a police scanner instead of a stereo.

You don't have an alarm clock...cause you never sleep more than 10 minutes at a time...never.

You think an AK is inaccurate.

You think an AR is underpowered....unless it's a really cool looking AR.

You have more than 12 issues of SWAT or Soldier of Fortune in your bathroom.

You have a carbon fiber toilet seat.

You have the latest tactical folder that cost $330 but your entire household furniture cost $50...including the cinderblock and board bookshelf.

You haven't read a non-tactics book since you "saw the light".

You watch movies and point out everyone's tactical errors to your buddies AND strangers in the theater.

You wake up everymorning and perform a tactical tuck-n-roll out of bed coming up in the fire position.

You "clear" your house everynight.

You're wife asks you to look at porn, sports or ANYTHING but more gun stuff.

When you go to a football game (cause your wife made you) you talk about the appropriate rifle and caliber to take out the QB from the cheap seats.

You wear camo everyday...except when you wear black.

Your idea of dressing up is a necktie and royal robbins.

When you go to a formal dinner and are required to wear a jacket, you wear a photographers vest.

You suck on bullets, not jolly ranchers.

You own a gun in every caliber made....and have a laser attached to each.

You think a Glock is the modern equal to the impact that the printing press had on civilization.

You believe the government is out to get you so you buried a weapons cache somewhere safe.

You think that owning an RPG is a perfectly acceptable request.

You believe that gunshows are the equivelent to sex....with every supermodel you've ever seen.

You've ever been asked to leave a gunshow for being inappropriate.

If everytime your significant other hugs you she says..."is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me" and you reply with a straight face..."it's a gun."

....:evil:
 
You know you're tactical when

You have more pictures of your guns and your hunting dog in your wallet than of your a wife and kids.

You get a 0.00% APR Credit Card offcer in the mail and apply just so you can buy a new gun.

When you buy a new gun...you have to buy it every finish available to match all your outfits. (thats for "A Tactical Eye for the Queer Guy") No offence intended

When you name your rifle, dog, wife, daugher are named "Charlene". (IN THAT ORDER)

You build more forts in the living room using chairs, boxes, and blankets than your 6 year old son.
 
If you "slice the pie" on entering your bathroom for routine nighttime urination......

If you eat with the off hand to keep your firearm hand unhindered.....
 
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