Hey Cathy, Here's some of my thoughts and I hope they'll help.
The thing about hearing protection cutting down on perceived recoil is true. When I was a kid, I didn't have the ears on and a .30-30's muzzle blast really busted my nerves in a hurry... three rounds fired and I was done.
One of my problems is that people like to say "kicks like a mule". I've never been kicked by a mule, but I have been kicked by a horse (have three right now). I've never met a gun that kicks like a horse yet. That HURTS and can cut you up pretty bad. I know people who have hurt themselves with recoil - but it usually involves doing "stupid human tricks" and not holding the firearm correctly.
The "kicks like a mule" thing... I grew up in the South in a family with some pre-WW2 farming background and that's an expression I've always heard. (As a horse owner, I've been kicked by a horse once too and I was lucky in that it just rolled off and I wasn't hurt. If you want to get kicked, get between two horses. But a mule can out-kick and out-buck a horse of equal weight.) Those stupid tricks with a gun will get you- people don't realize the recoil can do as much long-term damage as getting shot, but in different ways. But, if somebody has an arthritic condition like I do, they have to be more picky about what they shoot on a regular basis. The way an individual with a disability may hold the gun may not be the "absolute proper" way according to others. Kinda reminds me of some guys who say "if you don't go prone and sling up, you can't shoot", but there's more than one way to do things.
So far the gun I've shot with the most recoil was my hubby's 12 gauge 870 express.
I remember when I was 17 or 18, my Daddy picked up a 870 in 20guage. He and my sister shot it then and they both told me I shouldn't as I was in bad shape back then. A few years later, after rehab therapy and a couple of years lifting weights, I tried it out and didn't feel like it kicked. A couple of years ago, I tried a 12guage in an 870 and didn't feel like it kicked either. But there's the matters of my size/weight vs. your's and stock fit. I had the ears on with both 870's.
I went about 40 years afraid to pull a trigger because I was afraid of recoil and the loud noise. Getting good hearing protection and learning that guns do NOT kick like horses made all the difference.
I was 15 before I shot a .30-30 the first time and like I said, the muzzle blast busted my nerves in a hurry. It was a few years after that before I shot high-power rifles again. About 4 years ago, I got into K98k and VZ-24 and 8mm... first few rounds I fired was that hot stuff the Turks loaded and it was stout recoil, but not un-shootable. Seems to me like your Marlin '06 oughta be pretty nice shooting. The great thing about a .30-06 is the handloads can be loaded lighter with 110gr SP's for varmints or heavy with 220gr SP's, or anything in between depending on what you're doing. You might start light with it and work your way up according to your comfort.