Sigh..Just Had a Debate with my SFIL

Ignore him. Simple

I would just let it be, no need to get in arguments over things that create hard heads. And it is a Toyota Prius.

This would be a good time to buy an AK just to yank his chain.

yeah, in situations where i know i can't change anyone's mind and it'll only frustrate me to try, i just avoid the topic. they know where i stand, and they can ask for my opinion if they want it.

i agree the prius doesn't solve the oil problem.

Makes me appreciate my dad and father-in-law even more. My dad is 82 and still buying guns that he will never, ever shoot. My father-in-law is one of my best friends. We go to gun shows together and take motorcycle rides together. Not trying to rub salt, but just taking a moment to express my appreciation for the two 'fathers' in my life.

My FIL is an ignorant liberal A hole in Minneapolis MN, and can't even vote himself because he has a felony conviction. HA! I married his wonderful daughter 18 years ago and we butted heads a few times the first couple years. I stayed calm and rational, he ranted. I had facts, he had... well whatever those people have. I smile all the time and I never let him suck me in. He eventually gave up. He still throws a barb now and then but I don't take bait and mom-in-law usually shushes him up right away. One time he bragged about sending $50 to the brady's handgun control. I excused myself, left the room, came back from the den with an envelope and a donation to the NRA for $150. made a point of asking the wife to remind me to mail it the next day.

A general comment, moreso than gun-driven: Debating via email - especially with family - is generally counterproductive. If he insists, a GREAT show stopper for oral or written arguements that will stop any semi-rational person is..."Well, you may be right."

Then, walk away, change the subject, or [to keep this gun-related] go shopping for the gun/components/extras you've been wanting for a while.

Q

My BIL is a little like that. He is a peaceful man who thinks guns are dangerous, but once he realized I am a peaceful man who happens to like guns we get along just fine. He is a great guy, and I think it's a bit of a guilty pleasure that he enjoys a trip to the range to shoot sometimes.

I'm lucky enough that all my family members, extended and otherwise, are all pro-gun. Don't get me wrong though; many of them are imbeciles and some are down right dangerous, others can't be trusted or respected one whit, and a few are unable to think for themselves, but none are anti.

I've often thought about how my wife's knee-jerk reactions might have formed her, had I not been around to keep her neck red.

Sign him up for a NRA membership!

Arguments with older gentlemen are pointless because they are set in they're ways and way to bull-headed. Plus your still wet behind the ears in his eyes so you just aren't gonna win with him.
I know because i'm "older" now and I find that many folks are wrong unless they agree with me Her Highness loses many arguments with me because I'm never wrong. I might not get dinner, but again, point in fact, I'm never wrong. Well, ok there was that one time back in '84 and I'll agree that maybe I just wasn't full correct.

Mike

"I just wanted to rant but wondered if you all have had this happen with a "family" member... "

Only briefly, but my family generally knows me well enough to know there's nadda they could ever say that would alter my positions, none of them are strong anti gun enough to risk a debate, and they know I tend to do my research on a topic before having a strong opinion on a topic, and they know my opinion on the "gun issue" is strong. My ex in-laws were another matter, but they and I were smart enough to realize it was a topic best left alone for us all to get along.

He's not a family member.

He's a step-father-in-law.

If you're in line for a fat inheritance, then keep the peace if the money is worth it to you. Some old government worker isn't going to change his mind for your sake.

If not, well, then who gives a crap what he thinks? He'll respect you more if you don't. Get into debates via e-mail, and he won't respect you. Respect from in-laws is far more important than being liked.

If you can't have respect, fear is good, too. A quite, intimate Christmas with your wife can be really nice, if you get my drift.

A lot of this comes down to who wants what from whom. It's always best to want nothing from anyone, except those to whom you've made voluntary commitments, i.e. your spouse, children, and maybe a loyal dog or two.

I was given the advice to never argue with an unreasonable person. It has served me well. But the real showstopper for an argumentative person is "Perhaps you're right." As long as they don't know you're using it, it works great.

I had an argument with one of my uncles on my mom's side once. He's about as stereotypical suburbanite as you could possibly be. We got into talking about Detroit and how all sorts of wacky violence goes down there. He proceeded on this rant about how there are too many guns and we need to ban them all and it will solve the problem. My face turned into this :banghead:

I calmly pointed out to him that a study by U of Mich in the mid 90's found that suburban Detroit (3 counties) has a firearm ownership rate of ~45%. Detroit has a firearm ownership rate of ~20%. I suggested that maybe there is a cultural/societal problem and that gun violence is just a symptom of that. I pointed out that if his argument was valid, then his quiet neighborhood should be a war zone. He tried to weasel his way out of that but I had him trapped

My dad was standing behind him the whole time. My dad's not the biggest fan of guns but he tolerates them because he knows its my hobby and I am safe with them. He was cracking up (silently) as I dismantled my uncle's argument. I was also wearing my pistol the whole time and my dad knew that too.

My uncle is a good guy, just misguided. Be respectful and use facts if you want to argue. Nothing worse than burning a bridge over a disagreement.

Oh and here's the study I quoted in case someone wants to read it. Its actually really informative as to the demographics of firearm ownership. It really kills the gun owner as a dumb redneck or gangbanger stereotype.

Attached below

My sister is phenomenally liberal. She worked on the McGovern campaign and worked for every Democratic presidential candidate since. She hates guns. Sarah Palin terrifies her. Her husband is just as bad.

We don’t talk about politics. We don’t talk about guns. She knows I carry all the time and she ignores it.

My wife and I spent a week visiting these two loonies a few years ago at their MD home. I left my guns in the car and didn’t mention them. They were in blissful ignorance.

Every winter, they rent an apartment in Vero Beach for a month. When I visit them, I pack 2 guns. I don’t mention it. They might not even know. Doesn’t matter. I WILL NOT change my behavior to humor their stupid beliefs.

My question to the “gun show loophole” crowd is, “What about the Newspaper loophole”? There are guns in the classified ads every day. Are the people selling those guns going to do background checks? Are they even going to ask for ID?

How about the “office loophole”? If a guy at the office sells a gun to a fellow worker, is he going to do a background check or ask for ID? Selling the same gun to the same guy at a gun show won't make any difference.

People "buy guns on the street" every day and it's perfectly legal most places.

The "loophole" is a straw man / smokescreen attempt to justify more restrictions on gun sales and ownership.

I think we need to start arguing about the "dealer loophole." Why are background checks infringing on the convenience and even ability to buy a gun at a gun shop? This doesn't happen anywhere else...

We don’t talk about politics. We don’t talk about guns. She knows I carry all the time and she ignores it.

My wife and I spent a week visiting these two loonies a few years ago at their MD home. I left my guns in the car and didn’t mention them. They were in blissful ignorance.

Every winter, they rent an apartment in Vero Beach for a month. When I visit them, I pack 2 guns. I don’t mention it. They might not even know. Doesn’t matter. I WILL NOT change my behavior to humor their stupid beliefs.

Click to expand...

Carbon copy of my situation. Just don't talk about.

You can find studies on teh intarwebz to prove that Elvis is alive, gay and living in Tijuana.

Some people have too much time. If you're one of them, by all means debate this fellow. Otherwise, well, IMO, move along.

Yeah, just don't talk about it. If he brings it up, just say "Oh" or you could just simply smile and remind him the constitution protects you both.