Am I correct that these would be excellent .38 caliber rounds for an older S&W model 38 snubbie (the bodyguard airweight model before +P rating)?
Yup.
But maybe still too much recoil for my wife? She's recoil adverse.
Hmmmm. Well as Tim says, recoil ("pressure on your hand") is inverse to energy put into the bullet. The bullets are carrying energy levels equal to most +P rounds.
BUT: first, these aren't as strong as Buffalo Bore's +P rounds.
Second, the way you'll perceive the recoil on these standard pressure BuffBore's may be different from how they would feel from a similar-bullet-energy +P round.
Buffalo Bore's standard pressure 158 is similar in bullet energy, weight and shape to Remington's 158+P. In theory, the BuffBore's recoil should feel "nicer" in that the impact to your hand is spread out over more time. You should get more "push", less "slap". In order to avoid +P pressure, there is ONLY one choice Tim had to make: spread the push out over time to reduce peak pressure. He did it mainly with very careful powder selection.
What I don't know is how much of this "push versus slap" effect he's accomplished. It's possible the difference will be so marginal it's hard to detect. This "push versus slap" effect was first noticed by proponents of bigger-bore handguns to do the same power as smaller bore - for example, 45LC+P loaded to 44Mag-class power levels. The difference in how the recoil felt was VERY noticeable by early experimenters such as Dick Casull, John Linebaugh and Tim Sundles (years before he was selling ammo professionally). The 45LC loaded to about 32,000psi can do the same work a 44Mag needs 40,000psi to pull off per Linebaugh.
Of the three new BuffBore standard pressure choices, the lightest (125gr) *should* hurt the least in an ultralightweight gun. All three rounds should be significantly more useful for self defense than 148gr target wadcutters. She can still use those (mostly) for practice, though she should end every practice session with a cylinderfull of carry-grade ammo.
