Well, I LIKE cleaning my guns. In fact, it's one of the most fun recreational activities I have for a late Sunday afternoon in winter. So, anyway:
All of the usual solvents are about equally good, I am sure, but I like the smell of Outers the best. Klean Bore Formula 3 Gun Conditioner also has a fabulous smell. Really, they are all good, but I recently came across one that had some phoney-baloney orange or citrus smell added to it. It probably cleans just as well, but the smell offends my traditionalist, stuck-up nose.
Even though most modern solvents claim they won't harm wood in any way, I still remove wooden grip panels if I'm going to be doing a serious cleaning, which is most of the time.
As for lubrication, I usually wipe the whole gun down with the same solvent used for cleaning, since they all contain some fine, high-quality gun oils anyway. I don't think 3-in1 is a good choice. It's a little on the heavy side, and for a revolver, where you probably won't be opening it up for internal cleaning regularly, it may gunk up the gun. For autos, though, it's probably okay. I usually use Outers oil or the Klean Bore 3 stuff for any additional lubrication.