7.62FullMetalJacket
Member
Most have probably seen this in one form or another. Appropo for the "pay their fair share" crowd.
************************
The Ant and the Grasshopper
OLD VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,
building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances
and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!
MODERN VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a
fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the
shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others a! re cold and starving.
CBS, CNN, NBC, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering
grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a
table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast.
How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper
is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries
when they sing "It's Not Easy Being Green."
Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the
news stations film the group singing "We shall overcome." Jesse then has
the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
Tom Daschle , Dick Gephart, Hillary Clinton and Howard Dean exclaim in an
interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of
the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to
make him pay his "fair share."
Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act,"
retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing
to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay
his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.
Hillary Clinton gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a
defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of
Federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list of single-parent
welfare recipients.
The ant loses the case.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the
ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be
the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow.
The grasshopper is found dead in a drug-related incident and the house,
now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once
peaceful neighborhood.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Vote!
************************
The Ant and the Grasshopper
OLD VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long,
building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks he's a fool and laughs and dances
and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.
The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!
MODERN VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a
fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the
shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others a! re cold and starving.
CBS, CNN, NBC, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering
grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a
table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast.
How can this be, that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper
is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries
when they sing "It's Not Easy Being Green."
Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the
news stations film the group singing "We shall overcome." Jesse then has
the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
Tom Daschle , Dick Gephart, Hillary Clinton and Howard Dean exclaim in an
interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten rich off the back of
the grasshopper, and both call for an immediate tax hike on the ant to
make him pay his "fair share."
Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act,"
retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing
to hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay
his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.
Hillary Clinton gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a
defamation suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of
Federal judges that Bill Clinton appointed from a list of single-parent
welfare recipients.
The ant loses the case.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the
ant's food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be
the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow.
The grasshopper is found dead in a drug-related incident and the house,
now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of spiders who terrorize the once
peaceful neighborhood.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Vote!
