See with monkeys, just like people ya got to train em right. Most people are trained to be good and its only the few that are bad and need shootin. And as monkeys being primates like us they are easy to train.
Well I bet ya are asking how do you train a bunch of wild monkeys!?!
By killing a chicken thats how. See ya cant train a chicken at all, but the monkeys don't know that. They just see you trying to train one and laugh their arse off. Yea he tried that with us but we aint 'avin none of it, he must be 'avin a laugh.
Well what ya do is make it sit in the corner. Ya know "Sit!" "Stay" Well that dumb chicken dont know any better so he walks off. Ya pick him up and do it again "Sit" "Stay" Sure enough that little bstd walks off again. And again ya move him back and tell him to stay. Bout this time the monkeys are pissin themselves laughin to bits.
Thats when ya strike. Ya just pick up that damn chicken (Which by the way was meant for dinner any way) and chop off its little head. Heck pull an Ozzy and bites its head of for better effect on them stubborn monkeys. Toss the head to them little piss ants, pluck it and eat right in front of em.
Their eyes get really big round this time and when ya say "sit" they "SIT!"
Next group of little smart arse monkeys come by and act up ya say sit. Well they start to laugh and their buddies go WOA WOA WOA. SHHH thats one crazy fella ya better sit or your for dinner and were using yer head for footie!
Problem solved!