I did not take it that he was doing anything offensive or rude.
But two different people, who didn't have ill intent toward TM, did think he was doing something that was offensive and rude. Now, they may both have just been wrong. I suggested that possibility in my first response. We weren't there, we can't see. Maybe he was completely neutral. Maybe something was sending very "off" signals to these two different guys. T.M. thought their reactions were noteworthy enough, though, to come ask for help to avoid making whatever mistakes
might have instigated those reactions.
My point was if someone is offended by a perceived look or reaction from a person they don't even know they are just overly sensitive.
How can you say that seriously, though? Really? You can't imagine how some stranger might look at you in a way that made you uncomfortable? Might threaten you? If so, that's a pretty big failure of our concept of situational awareness: Noticing those around you and how they're acting and whether they're taking an improper amount of interest in you. Is that guy staring at you from across the sidewalk just lost in thought, or is he about to pull a knife and demand your wallet? Etc.
If you can agree that you do notice when people act oddly toward you, and indeed, that you may react to them to express that you're uncomfortable, and try to gauge whether they mean you harm or are just "off", then you must comprehend that someone else might react to YOU (or Trunk Monkey in this case) with the same attention.
It isn't like "situational awareness" is something that WE own. We try to get people to do it consciously and with a purpose, building a stronger habit that may keep them out of certain kinds of trouble, but everyone*** does this. Even unknown strangers in a parking lot or apartment commons in a sketchy part of town.
(*** -- Almost everyone -- with the acknowledgment that folks who's minds operate somewhere down the autistic spectrum often find reading social cues and non-verbal messages hard or impossible. Those folks often have to learn this as a very focused, laborious task.)
Going though an average day without getting your feelings hurt over some non-event isn't gruff and tough, it's normal adult behavior.
Again, that seems to miss T.M.'s question, and my point. He didn't get his feelings hurt, he was confronted by two different, non-threatening, people who were alarmed by his demeanor. He wants to avoid creating conflicts, both because doing so is dumb and a sign of social underdevelopment, and because conflicts with the wrong sorts of characters (especially in bad neighborhoods) can quickly escalate into violence.