Oh my, where to begin:
Customer (18 year old kid) : Can you hunt deer with a machine gun?
Me: Why, you got one?
That shuts 'em up quick.
Very old man on phone: You got any clips for a tree-o-six?
Me: Yes, Sir, we have magazines for many different models of thirty ought six; What model do you need one for?
5 second silence
Customer: I need a clip for a tree-o-six, dammit!
Me: I understand Sir, but I need to know which model. I can think of about 40 different magazines in thirty-ought six that we stock.
Customer: Whattaya, some kinda smart a__? I want a clip for a tree-o-six!!!
Me: <hangs up phone>
I'm pretty sure he wanted an en bloc for a Garand, but he didn't have to be that way about it.
Customer, kid about 20: You got any Glock 7's?
Me: NO!
Same question, from well-dressed business type: Do you have the Glock 7, the all-plastic pistol?
Me: There is no Glock 7.
Customer: No, there's one right there..<points at Glock 17 in case>
Me: Sir, that is the Glock 17, and it is not all plastic, nor will it be undetectable by airport X-ray security scans. This is not Hollywood, this is reality.
Customer: That's a gun for evil people.
Me: Tell that to the Saint Paul Police Department; they carry them daily.
One of my favorites-
Woman, came in with man who was looking at shotguns on the other side of the gun counter:
OMG, that's a machine gun up on the wall! Machine guns are illegal! I'm gonna call the cops right now...
Me, pointing to AR-15: One, that is NOT a machine gun, it is a semi-auto. Two, machine guns ARE legal to own in Minnesota, with proper Federal paperwork, and three, I've sold several of these to cops, my own Dad being one of them......here's the phone, go ahead and make a fool of yourself if you want......
so many more, usually the" <insert caliber here> is the
only one for defense"..........or the, "I was a Green Beret Marine Seal Sniper, and this is what I used"....<holding up AK with receiver cover scope mount>
Don't even get me started on the people bringing guns in for the gunsmith saying, "It's unloaded" as they hand it to you unopened-then when you open it and a round falls out, they stare dumbfounded and say, "How did that get in there...?" We'd usually slip an extra charge in there for that.....