DEFINE YOUR NEEDS and TRY THEM FIRST
Dragon,
I went through this with my wife. She had shot many years ago, but not recently and wanted a gun for self defense.
We ended up with a 9m.m. SIG 225 police trade in. It was small enough to fit in a glove box or be carried in a purse, but large enough to be controlable and simple to operate. It can do double duty as a house and car gun.
If you are living in a climate like my home state of Florida, a belt gun may stand out.
Off duty, during the day, I wear a BERETTA 3032 Tomcat in a pocket holster. When carrying in a pocket, cargo pants are a great idea as you will need the pockets for the gun and spare mags.
At night or during the winter, when I can get away with a jacket, vest or sweater, then I prefer a compact 9m.m. like the SPRINGFIELD ARMORY XD Sub Compact. I found it much easier to shoot than the GLOCK 26 or KAHR CW9. The GLOCK had to short a grip and I found it hard to control. I use the XD with the PEARCE Extension floor plates and found they make a nice improvement for me in controlling the gun in rapid fire.
The KAHR was uncomfortable to shoot due to the recoil. I could just get through a 50 round box of ammo and my hand was hurting.
BERETTA 92 Compact and 8000 Cougar (now sold by STOEGER), GLOCK 19, SIG 228 and 229 and WALTHER P-99 are all very good to excellent guns if you can conceal them under a jacket or vest. I would bet my life on any of them and have carried them. GET NIGHT SIGHTS, the really work.
I carry an H&K P-2000 on duty and it is a great gun, but overpriced and can rust.
The guns I suggest have a shorter grip with reduced magazine capacity in the BERETTA 92 Compact (13 rounds), SIG 228 and 229 (13 rounds). The GLOCK 19 and WALTHER P-99 both carry 15 rounds magazines.
My major complaint with longer grip guns like the full size BERETTA 92 and the 8000 Cougar is that they are harder to conceal because of the longer grip. The same problem applies with the 1911 .45ACP, but is worse because the stell frame 1911 pistols are heavier.
The SIG 225 police trade ins are a bargain with one caution. Mine and many of the early ones will not shot ANY HOLLOW POINT. Mine is 100% reliable with ball and with COR BON Powerball ammo which is what I keep in it.
The gun has a good trigger (it can be smoothed), decent sights and is in that perfect all purpose size that fits the GLOCK 19. SIG 229 and WALTHER p-99.
I recommend a quality pancake style holster, although with the lighter guns, you can also use a belt slide.
All have proven completely reliable and accurate enough for defense to me.
There are other good choices, but I can only recommend what I have actually used.
Jim