What load to whack Barney?

[Hardtarget]

the higher the "splatter quotient" the BETTER!
Think MASSIVE ! and don't hesitate.
Mark.

 

[kalibear45]

A 300gr .44 magnum slug should do the trick

 

[larryw]

For a one-shot kill, set the remote to "off". No pinko, wimpy purple dinos in this house!

 

[Gunner45]

Oh come on guys,........I can't belive no one listed the .577 Tyranasaur.


Gunner45

 

[enichols]

Flamethrower.

 

[Feanaro]

I'm thinking a 700 Nitro Express to the head, just to be sure.

 

[KC]

I have done this, great way to relieve tension.
I personally reccomend a few .45-70 slugs, followed by a magazine or two of .308. Be careful though; the wind will likely pick up the tattered shreds, making cleanup problematic. A small can of tomato paste surgically inserted in the subject's torso prior to exection will reduce this undesireable scattering effect. But oh, the splatter...

Good Times.



KC

 

[rick458]

I will second the Flame thrower
as for the .577 Tyranosaur I thought Barney was the one who was supposed to die not us

 

[SquirrelNuts]

You could drag him through a minefield. Tie some fishing line to his neck and see how good his EOD skills are.

-SquirrelNuts

 

[Sleeping Dog]

Let me see if I can attach something relevant to sing along with ...

 

[foghornl]

Up close, I would suggest the "Dragon's Breath" 12 Ga load. Longer distance, probably some .30 Cal incendiary rounds.

 

[Brian Williams]

106 recoiless with flechette round, tap the 50 cal spotter a few times and then stand aside and let the 106 recoiless do the job

 

[axeman_g]

Barney gets a clean kill

As a father of a 30 month old, I understand your pain.

I think Barney deserves a quick, clean killing shot. In a classic sort of way, I would personally like to use some sort of European Drilling on him.

The Wiggles on the other hand get this treatment ... every single one of the cast members....

This is an old Persian execution method. Take the condemd (sp?) and slice open both palms of their hands (or paws???). Pour salt into the wound, stick their finger tips into the cuts. Then bind the persons hands into fists with leather. Then soak their hands in water long enough so the leather will shrink tight around their fists.

Infection will set in about three days later. The fingernails will continously grow into the wound, keeping it from healing, creating more infection and agonizing pain. Eventually gangrene will set in and spread up both arms. The victim will usually die in extreme pain approximatley 30 days later.

I save this special treatment for very deserving individuals. The Wiggles qualify.

 

[Reloader]

My son almost got expelled in 5th grade for singing:

"I hate you
you hate me
I shot Barney happily
A shot rang out and
Barney hit the floor!
No more purple dinosaur!"

NO sense of humor in schools anymore, even if he did sing it to the kindergarten classes................

 

[Wombat]

RPG

Definite one shot stop. A little messy, but most satisfying.

 

[GhostShooter]

Well I was going to say a dull butter knife but after reading axeman's post .... um..... I think I'll *heads for door* be seeing ya.

 

[Neal Bloom]

My bare hands would suffice! Few things raise my blood pressure as that thing. I thank the heavens my two kids grew out of it.

 

[shermacman]

I like the Mother Earth method: small mammals with sharp teeth ripping at the flesh until extinct. No guns, no explosives, totally natural, totally organic!

 

[mtnbkr]

I think I'd go with .22 LR and just wing the sucker to death

Darn, you beat me to it. That's exactly what I'd do. Buy a brick of ammo and a 10/22 and spend the day sniping barney. Even better if I get to stalk him through the woods while doing it

Chris

 

[TheFrontRange]

For just one horrible second I thought this thread was some sort of recipe for knocking off none other than Barney Fife, M.D. (Mayberry Deputy).

I knew that such was not in keeping with the standards here at THR and I'm sure most if not all members here would rush to the backup of our favorite small-town lawman, especially since he'd be trying and probably fumbling to speed-load that one round into his .38!

Viva Fife!

 

[CZ-75]

155mm or larger.

All I want to find is a purple smear 20 yards long.

 

[stevelyn]

Two pounds of C-4. However since that's not easy to come by, an open area, ten feet of cannon fuse, a roll of duct tape, two cans of GOEX, a lifeboat match and reliable transportation.

 

[Mute]

I'd prefer a baseball bat so that death will be slow and painful.

 

[pax]

Best way to kill Barney is to stop buying his products.

Oh, yeah, and turn off the TV.

pax

No. -- first word learned by a toddler, last word learned by toddler's parents

 

[Gus Dddysgrl]

I would go for the baseball bat idea, but I am better with a field hockey stick. Besides I've hit people(on accident) with mine and it didn't break. I've seen fewer hockey sticks broken then baseball bats.

Gus

PS Once we get rid of Barney are there any other annoying charaters on TV we should get rid of?