You make a strong case and I completely sympathize with the damned if you do, damned if you dont plight. My reaction was a bit emotional and I guess while I can see you are right, I just wish the peace officers could or would have tried harder to de-escalate the situation. Perhaps they did try.
In answer to your question, "Would you agree that it is pretty unusual that someone would react that way when asked for ID?"
I have a strong aversion to a police officer asking for my I.D. unless I'm driving a car. Here is the reason:
I have, while minding my own business, standing in a friend's yard, or on the sidewalk in front of my girlfriend's house, not doing anything in particular but standing and talking, been approached no less than 4 times by officers and asked for I.D.
I was asked intrusive questions such as "where was I going" (I wasnt going anywhere, I was obviously standing there talking to someone else), "what was I doing there in the area", etc.
I was patted down for weapons and treated suspiciously and detained until the officers in question were satisfied. I was not given any reason for them to approach me. This, is in my opinion harassment, and reason why officers should not be allowed to ask for I.D. unless you are the suspect of a crime or for a driver's license while driving a vehicle.
I have never been arrested, nor to my knowledge has a warrant ever been made for my arrest.
Yet I can see clearly why someone would not want to provide I.D. , and might look to their home as a safety zone to hide from having to comply with such a request.
I think it is easy when you're dealing with "bad guys" 8 hours a day to lose sight of the fact that as a person in authority, someone carrying a gun no less, you can easily rattle someone and leave them shaken up - especially when most of the actions of the day (seen in newspapers, on television, and in the bravado persona of macho cops) does not inspire trust.
To help illustrate, I'd like to share that my 13 year old sister shared with me recently that she actually fears the police and feels more uncomfortable around them than she does driving through a neighborhood with gangsters. I assure you she did not come to her conclusions with ANY help on my part as I have not shared my negative emotions toward them with her. I don't know where she got her fear from, and I didnt ask her. But:
How does that inspire confidence to be open and truthful with the police?