Recoil is pretty much what you make it to be.
I have a 629 with a 3" barrel, it's quite a hand full, my brother in law has a 629 with a 9" barrel and scope mounted on it, the same loads that make my little gun buck and snort, are like nothing happened in in his. I hear about folks that think a .357 kicks in a 4" barrel, but I guess I'm desencitised from the 44 mag. I think with enough practice, any of them are OK.
The gun that's hardest on my hand is my little P3AT, I can only shoot about 100 through it in 1 setting. This has as much to do with grips and how little there is to grip as anything. That's the 2nd thing, I think that grips that are comfortable make alot of difference. I have tryed several styles and brands, all my relovers wear rubber Hogue, as they seem to fit my hand the best.
Last thing is noise. I think noise is as hard to handle as the recoil, and makes it worse. I use earplugs myself, but I see most folks that use them don't instal them right. You have to reach over your head and lift your ear up with one hand to make the ear canal strate, then put the plug in flush with the ear. Now, I admit that on occasion, I've had to use a key to dig the plugs from my ear, but my hearing scores at work haven't change in 10 years. If you don't wear plugs right, I say go with muffs.
I hope this helps.