I've also heard that the .357 is a better man stopper because it's more controllable.
Apples and oranges.
Terminal ballistics is an inexact science and 44 magnum for social work (having to do with people) is barely better than 44 special. Energy wasted is just that, wasted.
No manstopper will stop anything if it misses.
A flinch, once developed is VERY hard to unlearn.
I started out shooting .357 magnum 38 years ago because I could get a gun in that caliber and ammunition was less expensive (and I started loading my own the same week I bought the gun). I now shoot 22 Long Rifle in various handguns, 9mm, 45 ACP, .357 Mag, 44 Mag, 45 Colt and 454 Casull. I load most of the magnum cases to medium Special velocities for my convenience.
If this is your first handgun, I would recommend a good, target-grade 22 rimfire. Shooting a handgun is a different skill than a long gun and 22 rimfire is a lot cheaper to practice with than even the least expensive handloads (I noticed your other thread asking about loading).
Second choice would be .357 Magnum and shooting 38 Special power loads (or actual 38 Special ammunition) for practice.
Not that the 44 Magnum is only for experts or too much to handle. But lighter loads, cheaper ammo and the ability to have LOTS of practice is more valuable than the "cachet" of large bore. Besides, revolvers are somewhat addicting and you will wind up with a big brother for the medium caliber soon enough.
In the meantime, consider this:
In the absence of any other information about your shooting experience, my recommendation is for a 22 rimfire.
semi-automatics:
Ruger Mark I, II or current model III
or Browning Buckmark or
Smith & Wesson Model 41
Revolvers that come immediately to mind are:
Ruger SP101
Ruger Single-Six
Smith & Wesson's K-Frame K-22 "Masterpiece" (I had one a while back)
Smith & Wesson 617
Taurus (I forget the model #)
Here's my reasoning:
1 Practice is important for becoming a good shot. Practice (beyond dry firing) takes ammo. Ammo is cheaper for a 22 than for any other caliber. Example: 22 rimfire costs (around here) $20 - $30 per 500. 500 rounds of 9mm (a very inexpensive round) is at least $100 to $150 per 500.
2 Practice with a round that has almost no recoil makes concentration on sight picture, breathing and trigger control much easier without the distraction of recoil and excessive muzzle blast. You can add those elements later after you have gotten the basics ingrained in your subconscious. If you start out with a hard-recoiling round you are almost certain to develop anticipation (usually characterized by a flinch) which is devilishly hard to cure. Prevention is much easier to, especially while you are learning.
3 Having a good, accurate 22 will put you on the range (if you go to a formal or informal shooting range) where you will get acquainted with other shooters, see their gun handling practices and see their guns. Most gun owners are proud of their hardware and if you exhibit good safety practices, a modicum of shooting skill and a little bit of polite interest, they will very probably let you handle their guns and even send a few rounds downrange. You can get to try out a wide variety of guns that way and collect testimonials from people other than salesmen when you go to a store.
4 Most (accurate) 22 rimfire guns are cheaper to buy than similarly accurate centerfire guns and hold their resale value well.
Good luck. Thanks for reading.
Lost Sheep