I'll put in a good word for the Smith & Wesson BG380! The recoil is negligible at best, slide stays open at the end of the magazine, is easy to handle, accurate out of the box, and easily concealable at all times. I carry an extra magazine with me at all times and use Hornaday's critical defense ammo.
It would probably be best to have your wife shoot any gun before purchasing if possible, but definitely make sure she tries the Body Guard 380.