I can't write music at all, but I'm pretty good with lyrics. Given that Karaoke discs provide a near-limitless supply of songs without the words, I've found music I liked and have written several songs that have left audiences howling, and usually one woman blushing furiously. (I'm dangerous when you put a pen in my hand...)
A friend suggested I write a song about my favorite gun. After getting over my initial reaction, I started thinking about it.
Anyway, here's what I came up with. It helps if you are familiar with the original song.
Ross Five Hundred
Lyrics by John Ross
To the tune of “Zoot Suit Riot” by The Cherry Poppin’ Daddies
Sixteen bar lead-in
What’s that thundering in the woods? A real belt cannon that delivers the goods
Balance and power and lots of blam; Am I its Daddy? Yes I am!
Ruger came to play, but they see they don’t know how
They’d best stay away from four hundreds at two thou!
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Throw down a half pound of lead
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Keep the front sight out of your head
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Throw down a half pound of lead
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Keep the front sight out of your head
(Spoken)
Fire, Jerry!
A tight-gapped, custom-made, pile-driver, man
Fast twist spinning slugs fast as it can
Cut me, Elmer, and you’ll understand
In my veins muzzle energy ran
The Performance Center says it was the factory’s finest hour
Now you dealers know where your shooters come for power!
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Throw down a half pound of lead
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Keep the front sight out of your head
You’ve got a Ross .500!
You’ve got a Ross .500!
You’ve got a Ross .500!
(Spoken)
It’s really nice
Shoot every day
Best grip it firmly
Don’t let it get away
It’s really strong
Comes up so well
Don’t let it bite you
It’s got stomp from Hell!
Oh, the Performance Center says it was the factory’s finest hour
Now you dealers know where your shooters come for power!
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Throw down a half pound of lead
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Keep the front sight out of your head
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Throw down a half pound of lead
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Keep the front sight out of your head
You’ve got a Ross .500!
You’ve got a Ross .500!
You’ve got a Ross .500!
(Spoken)
I think I’m about ready to shoot it…
JR
A friend suggested I write a song about my favorite gun. After getting over my initial reaction, I started thinking about it.
Anyway, here's what I came up with. It helps if you are familiar with the original song.
Ross Five Hundred
Lyrics by John Ross
To the tune of “Zoot Suit Riot” by The Cherry Poppin’ Daddies
Sixteen bar lead-in
What’s that thundering in the woods? A real belt cannon that delivers the goods
Balance and power and lots of blam; Am I its Daddy? Yes I am!
Ruger came to play, but they see they don’t know how
They’d best stay away from four hundreds at two thou!
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Throw down a half pound of lead
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Keep the front sight out of your head
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Throw down a half pound of lead
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Keep the front sight out of your head
(Spoken)
Fire, Jerry!
A tight-gapped, custom-made, pile-driver, man
Fast twist spinning slugs fast as it can
Cut me, Elmer, and you’ll understand
In my veins muzzle energy ran
The Performance Center says it was the factory’s finest hour
Now you dealers know where your shooters come for power!
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Throw down a half pound of lead
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Keep the front sight out of your head
You’ve got a Ross .500!
You’ve got a Ross .500!
You’ve got a Ross .500!
(Spoken)
It’s really nice
Shoot every day
Best grip it firmly
Don’t let it get away
It’s really strong
Comes up so well
Don’t let it bite you
It’s got stomp from Hell!
Oh, the Performance Center says it was the factory’s finest hour
Now you dealers know where your shooters come for power!
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Throw down a half pound of lead
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Keep the front sight out of your head
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Throw down a half pound of lead
Ross Five Hundred (Magnum!)
Keep the front sight out of your head
You’ve got a Ross .500!
You’ve got a Ross .500!
You’ve got a Ross .500!
(Spoken)
I think I’m about ready to shoot it…
JR